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Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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When Playing "Hard-To-Get" Goes Too Far?! / Playing Hard To Get- The Pros And Cons? / A Solution Against Girls Playing ''hard To Get'' (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:03pm On May 04, 2009
IyaKadijat:

The best advice my mother ever gave me: "Always act like a lady, but date like a man."

If there was a man I didn't particularly care for, but I found him sexually attractive, I might have sex with him or keep him as a "friend with benefits", while still dating. If I found a man I actually liked and thought we may have some longevity together-he is the one I made wait for the nookie!

You can't blame women for playing hard to get since men always act like they have the attention span of a 4 year old if you give the p_ssy up too fast. If I make him wait, and give him something to look forward to by teasing or heavy kissing, petting, etc.-I've learned it drives them crazy! They'll be intrigued enough to want to know more about this woman before lying down with you. That's not to say they won't still try their luck, but I think the respect factor is there more than ever. Now if he can't wait until I'm comfortable enough to go on that level with him-then he wasn't the guy for me anyways!  

Maybe its me who is not understanding this "game" . . . is this about playing hard to get when a man asks you out or denying him sex until you feel you are ready to give it up? I dont understand why women who date are so quick to fall on their backs . . . what happened to giving you both time to develop intimacy outside of sex?
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:04pm On May 04, 2009
stillwater:

Some of us have to analyse first before venturing into anything.

pure waste of time . . . you know what you want already.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:07pm On May 04, 2009
davidylan:

pure waste of time . . . you know what you want already.

Waste of your time not mine. I don't act on impulse.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by 4Play(m): 4:11pm On May 04, 2009
@stillwater

Can you summarise in intelligible words what purpose your game serves?
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by IyaKadijat(f): 4:11pm On May 04, 2009
davidylan:

Maybe its me who is not understanding this "game" . . . is this about playing hard to get when a man asks you out or denying him sex until you feel you are ready to give it up? I dont understand why women who date are so quick to fall on their backs . . . what happened to giving you both time to develop intimacy outside of sex?

I agree with you wholeheartedly. But as I said in another thread, women[i] think[/i] about sex just as much as men do-we're all human here. The question is, do we act on it as much as men do? No-because we know society dictates that men can have their fun and not be called a ho in the morning. Females aren't so fortunate in this aspect.

I want to be respected and have a man I'm really interested in get to develop intimacy outside of sex before we go "there".
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:14pm On May 04, 2009
stillwater:

Waste of your time not mine. I don't act on impulse.

BS. Before a guy asks you out he's been sending signals for ages . . . you've had more than enough time to "analyse" the situation.

You all play hard to get and end up like iyakadijat anyway . . .
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by ThiefOfHearts(f): 4:18pm On May 04, 2009
Dont go and get yourself tailored for someone else's marriage. Olodo.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:21pm On May 04, 2009
4 Play:

@stillwater

Can you summarise in intelligible words what purpose your game serves?

What game? I'm talking about something innate in me when it comes to making decisions. If people call it playing hard to get, that's their business. Can't be bothered. It's very natural for me not to act spontaneously.

Intelligible words? Imagine the pomposity.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:23pm On May 04, 2009
davidylan:

BS. Before a guy asks you out he's been sending signals for ages . . . you've had more than enough time to "analyse" the situation.

You all play hard to get and end up like iyakadijat anyway . . .

Iyakadijat plays hard to get too? I laugh in Igbo. Funny enough I hardly think them through because it has always been a blatant NO!
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by spikedcylinder: 4:25pm On May 04, 2009
davidylan:

BS. Before a guy asks you out he's been sending signals for ages . . . you've had more than enough time to "analyse" the situation.

You all play hard to get and end up like iyakadijat anyway . . .

See this one? If a girl lays on her back on the first day now, you'll be the first person to try and use science to calculate the alacrity at which she spread her legs for you.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by 4Play(m): 4:26pm On May 04, 2009
stillwater:

What game? I'm talking about something innate in me when it comes to making decisions. If people call it playing hard to get, that's their business. Can't be bothered. It's very natural for me not to act spontaneously.

Sometimes, you can't help but admire the way people lie to themselves.  grin  

If you are ''playing'' as you already effectively acknowledged, what purpose does it serve? You are avoiding rushed decisions? Complete bollocks, you women already have a good idea what your decision is. The whole purpose of the game is to influence the man's perceptions of you. You know that's the truth.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by IyaKadijat(f): 4:29pm On May 04, 2009
I don't know about "playing". I like to go with the flow of things. If I don't want to have sex with you for whatever my reasoning is at the moment-that's not "playing" anything-that's me not wanting to have sex with you. No means no, right?
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:29pm On May 04, 2009
4 Play:

Sometimes, you can't help but admire the way people lie to themselves.  grin  

If you are ''playing'' as you already effectively acknowledged, what purpose does it serve? You are avoiding rushed decisions? Complete bollocks, you women already have a good idea what your decision is. The whole purpose of the game is to influence the man's perceptions of you. You know that's the truth.

No mind them now . . . that's why majority are still single today and pretending to themselves in daddy's house.

stillwater:

What game? I'm talking about something innate in me when it comes to making decisions. If people call it playing hard to get, that's their business. Can't be bothered. It's very natural for me not to act spontaneously.

This one na english language . . . a dude doesnt ask you out the first time he met you so the case of "acting spontaneously" does not arise. He must have been giving you signals for so long that you knew the inevitable was coming. In all that time you couldnt make a decision as to whether you wanted to continue seeing him as a friend or something deeper?

Make una dey deceive una sef dia.

spikedcylinder:

See this one? If a girl lays on her back on the first day now, you'll be the first person to try and use science to calculate the alacrity at which she spread her legs for you.

She cant lay on her back the first day . . . because i frankly wont even let it get to that stage. I'm a dude but even i know some things are not appropriate. Sex on a first date is one of them.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:33pm On May 04, 2009
4 Play:

Sometimes, you can't help but admire the way people lie to themselves.  grin  

If you are ''playing'' as you already effectively acknowledged, what purpose does it serve? You are avoiding rushed decisions? Complete bollocks, you women already have a good idea what your decision is. The whole purpose of the game is to influence the man's perceptions of you. You know that's the truth.

Since you guys have dismissed the playing as BS times without number, shouldn't I have changed my ways by now just to please the average man? *rolls eyes*

Point is I'll act as I deem it fit at any given situation. No apologies given.  In this 21st century a man's perception on how I choose to decide is the least of my concern.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:34pm On May 04, 2009
Wanting you to cherish her more (May not want you to take her for granted, guys, you know exactly what I’m talking about, She may think that if she gives in or open up too fast for you, she may lose the attractiveness and respect from you.)

May want to make more time to look for a ‘better catch’ Sometimes she just wants to get more security and assurance from you before she decides on you. Give her the time, do not force her to make a decision

Observe the women that you meet in the future. Determine whether they are just playing hard to get because they want to get assurance from you, or are they just playing around.

Although, some women can take it to the extreme, this can be very unnecessary.

I've heard some guys enjoy 'the chase' though (when the forming is down moderately), how true is this?
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by StrStruck(f): 4:36pm On May 04, 2009
Wow, this spoke to me, I'm going jump into the arms of the next guy who shows the slightest interest in me.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:39pm On May 04, 2009
St☆rStruck:

Wow, this spoke to me, I'm going jump into the arms of the next guy who shows the slightest interest in me.
Lol
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by 4Play(m): 4:40pm On May 04, 2009
stillwater:

Since you guys have dismissed the playing as BS times without number, shouldn't I have changed my ways by now just to please the average man? *rolls eyes*

Point is I'll act as I deem it fit at any given situation. No apologies given.  In this 21st century a man's perception on how I choose to decide is the least of my concern.

This orgy of self-deception continues.

Effectively, you claim to be playing so that you can make up your mind whether the suitor is good for you. Does your brain work in slow motion? You know that is complete BS.

A man's perception is the least of your concern? Who do you think you are deceiving with such porkies?  grin

Keep backtracking. The reality is that you play games that are ultimately counter-productive because the games won't help you get a better suitor.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:41pm On May 04, 2009
davidylan:


This one na english language . . . a dude doesnt ask you out the first time he met you so the case of "acting spontaneously" does not arise. He must have been giving you signals for so long that you knew the inevitable was coming. In all that time you couldnt make a decision as to whether you wanted to continue seeing him as a friend or something deeper?

Make una dey deceive una sef dia.


The English scatter your head? tongue Live with it. I've said my own.

St☆rStruck:

Wow, this spoke to me, I'm going jump into the arms of the next guy who shows the slightest interest in me.

Rotflmao. Even an idiot (of which they are uncountable in numbers compared to the sensible ones) that asks you out would start screaming "she's playing hard to get".
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:45pm On May 04, 2009
stillwater:

The English scatter your head? tongue Live with it. I've said my own.

You basically deceived yourself . . . grin Yeah you really dont care what men think of you . . . tell that to the marines.

stillwater:

Rotflmao. Even an idiot (of which they are uncountable in numbers compared to the sensible ones) that asks you out would start screaming "she's playing hard to get".

You only attract those you deserve . . . if you find only idiots flocking to you then you shld do some serious soul searching.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by 4Play(m): 4:49pm On May 04, 2009
St☆rStruck:

Wow, this spoke to me, I'm going jump into the arms of the next guy who shows the slightest interest in me.

Spare us your straw man. If you are not interested in a suitor, you tell him straight. For the ones you are interested in, why the games?
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:57pm On May 04, 2009
4 Play:

This orgy of self-deception continues.

Effectively, you claim to be playing so that you can make up your mind whether the suitor is good for you. Does your brain work in slow motion? You know that is complete BS.


I claim not to give an immediate answer so that I can make up my mind. I told you before you can call it whatever you feel. And it's a secret pleasure making guys uppity for a while.

A man's perception is the least of your concern? Who do you think you are deceiving with such porkies? grin


. . . when it comes to instances such as this.

Keep backtracking. The reality is that you play games that are ultimately counter-productive because the games won't help you get a better suitor.

Neither do the ones who agree at the spur of the moment are guaranteed some happily ever after tale you are trying to imply.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 4:59pm On May 04, 2009
davidylan:

You basically deceived yourself . . . grin Yeah you really dont care what men think of you . . . tell that to the marines.

You only attract those you deserve . . . if you find only idiots flocking to you then you shld do some serious soul searching.

That was a scenario I painted there before you go on your "search within" boredom filled frenzy. grin
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 5:00pm On May 04, 2009
stillwater:

I claim not to give an immediate answer so that I can make up my mind. I told you before you can call it whatever you feel. And it's a secret pleasure making guys uppity for a while.

cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy I cant shout.
All these small boys disgracing us up and down.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 5:03pm On May 04, 2009
davidylan:

cheesy cheesy cheesy cheesy I cant shout.
All these small boys disgracing us up and down.

Continue deceiving yourself! grin
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by 4Play(m): 5:05pm On May 04, 2009
stillwater:

I claim not to give an immediate answer so that I can make up my mind. I told you before you can call it whatever you feel. And it's a secret pleasure making guys uppity for a while.  

. . . when it comes to instances such as this. Neither do the ones who agree at the spur of the moment are guaranteed some happily ever after tale you are trying to imply.

It's not about the immediacy of the answer. We presume you will tell the men you are not interested in instantly.

The question is how do you deal with the ones you are interested in? To allow your decision linger shows you have an interest.

At what point will you stop this absurd lie and admit that part of the ''delay'' is to help shape the man's perception of you?
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by asha80(m): 5:05pm On May 04, 2009
I personally do not have time for hard to get if it gets past one week.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by StrStruck(f): 5:10pm On May 04, 2009
stillwater:

Rotflmao. Even an idiot (of which they are uncountable in numbers compared to the sensible ones) that asks you out would start screaming "she's playing hard to get".

Sis, if you don't jump on the boat you will not have a husband and that would be really costly; people on NL will create threads about you and the Earth will cave in and life as we know it will be changed foreveeeeeeer.
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 5:12pm On May 04, 2009
4 Play:

It's not about the immediacy of the answer. We presume you will tell the men you are not interested in instantly.

The question is how do you deal with the ones you are interested in? To allow your decision linger shows you have an interest.

At what point will you stop this absurd lie and admit that part of the ''delay'' is to help shape the man's perception of you?  

Allow stillwater to deceive herself now . . . when she's tired of daddy's room she wont need to be told what to do. Are we surprised when we see who many of these women eventually end up married to after all the early shakara?
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by jalether(m): 5:15pm On May 04, 2009
GAME PLAYING ARE FOR IMMATURE HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS, a grown woman/lady

shouldnt indulge in this BS women call hard to get, you are old enough to go for

what you want in life, if you are attracted to a guy, why hide your feelings, women need

to stop playing the innocent role, THE COLD TRUTH OF THE MATTER IS, WHETHER YOU PLAY HARD TO GET OR NOT

WHAT WILL BE, WILL BE. IF THE GUY LOOSES INTEREST ALONG THE LINE OR JUST HAS THE AGENDA OF HAVING SEX WITH

YOU,HE IS STILL GONNA DUMP YOU ANYWAYS, so is the game worth playing afterall
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 5:16pm On May 04, 2009
4 Play:

It's not about the immediacy of the answer. We presume you will tell the men you are not interested instantly.

The question is how do you deal with the ones you are interested in? To allow your decision linger shows you have an interest.


Of course. But having a relationship when it comes to me has to do with more than mere interest. HENCE  the thinking things through before a definite answer. There are a lot of girls that would agree instantly, I have no problems with that, no one should have problems with my views either! angry

At what point will you stop this absurd lie and admit that part of the ''delay'' is to help shape the man's perception of you?  

The absurdity here has to do with YOU trying to force me to admit to something I do not consider as important. What da heck am I trying to shape when his perception about me has already been made that's why he stepped up to me?
Re: Playing Hard-to-get Could Be Costly by Nobody: 5:20pm On May 04, 2009
jalether:

GAME PLAYING ARE FOR IMMATURE HIGH SCHOOL GIRLS, a grown woman/lady

shouldnt indulge in this BS women call hard to get, you are old enough to go for

what you want in life, if you are attracted to a guy, why hide your feelings, women need

to stop playing the innocent role, THE COLD TRUTH OF THE MATTER IS, WHETHER YOU PLAY HARD TO GET OR NOT

WHAT WILL BE, WILL BE. IF THE GUY LOOSES INTEREST ALONG THE LINE OR JUST HAS THE AGENDA OF HAVING SEX WITH

YOU,HE IS STILL GONNA DUMP YOU ANYWAYS, so is the game worth playing afterall

Say it louder bro . . . someone here isnt listening.

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