Hey yáll i have a question for all: Is Monogamy a myth ?

Why do SOME people find it soo hard to remain faithful. I met several married men who cheat on their wives

One said that his reason is that "his wife often times convulses when he sexes her" [she's epileptic]

the other one said " his wife was a virgin when he met her and she doesn't enjoy sex as much as he does" so he has to live his life,

Anyways, Im thinking that back in the day: women knew that they their husbands would have more than one wive, girlfriend, or concubine, as long as they were the FIRST wife and had a SON they didn't worry much about what their husbands were doing, some women still think this way,

But now, with the gender ratio imbalance, with more women than men, although every one desires a faithful husband, BF, and such, most people are not faithful therefore, Is Monogamy, nothing than a myth ?


I am meeting more and more Nigerian men, mostly men ABROAD who desire and want to remain Single, they just want to be poking girls all over the place, but don't want to be "TIED DOWN""

What do yáll think is Monogamy nothing but a myth ? Believing which may lead to nothing but a heartbreak,

posakosa:

What do yáll think is Monogamy nothing but a myth ? Believing which may lead to nothing but a heartbreak,

I think it's a MYTH these days.
The moral decadence has made monogamy fade into oblivion.
Too many women out there don't mind sleeping with married men for nothing.
Boredom has made most of em proud being second fiddles. . . .

Its not a myth. . . . . .FEW couples still stay faithful to each other
keyword - few

tope5000:

Its not a myth. . . . . .FEW couples still stay faithful to each other
keyword - few

What is the meaning of being faithful to each other?

U gotta admit times have changed. . . . .Back in the days, cheating meant one thing: sexual contact with another woman or man(if you are gay)
But these days, women are getting more complex and less accepting of betrayal of any sort.
Little issues like confiding in another woman emotionally other than one's partner is cheating nowadays.

~Sauron~:

I think it's a MYTH these days.
The moral decadence has made monogamy fade into oblivion.
Too many women out there don't mind sleeping with married men for nothing.
Boredom has made most of em proud being second fiddles. . . .

But even back then, it was a myth, many of our fore, fore fathers had more than one wife.

Too many women out there don't mind sleeping with married men for nothing.

This i believe is not a new phenomenon.

posakosa:

But even back then, it was a myth,  many of our fore, fore fathers had more than one wife.

It wasn't cheating then cos they were bringing em home after legally married to them.
There was no secret about it. . . . .A village chief could have 8 women in his bedroom conveniently.
Polygamy was an accepted practise in em days.

This i believe is not a new phenomenon.

There's a difference. . . . .Polygamy(it allows one to marry more than one wife)
Monogamy(you have to be with one at a time).

tope5000:

Its not a myth. . . . . .FEW couples still stay faithful to each other
keyword - few

its a myth I believe. If you were first wife and had a son. One was often respected back then. It didn't mean you or ur husband was faithful.  

But unless, there is an extremely valid reason, couples "hardly remain faithful"

I think that couples normally have to overcome an obstacle to understand their value to one another, before they both decide to "remain faithful" until they both experience a specific hardship, then Monogamy in my opinion is a Myth,

~Sauron~:

What is the meaning of being [b]faithful to each other?[/b]

U gotta admit times have changed. . . . .Back in the days, cheating meant one thing: sexual contact with another woman or man(if you are gay)
But these days, women are getting more complex and less accepting of betrayal of any sort.
Little issues like confiding in another woman emotionally other than one's partner is cheating nowadays.

The whole meaning of a relationship is to stay together, to be there for each other, in good times and in bad times, to support and love each other unconditionally. For this to work, both partners must have faith in themselves that they can live up to this commitment, and faith in the partner to do this too.

To be faithful is simply to live up to your partner's faith in you. To be faithful is to never do anything that you don't want your partner to know about. If you have faith in your lover, you allow him/her to do anything s/he wants, as long as it is not against your wishes, and you rely on him/her to know your wishes. A faithful couple never has any secrets from each other, and they tell each other anything and everything that is of any importance.

posakosa:

its a myth I believe. If you were first wife and had a son. One was often respected back then. It didn't mean you or ur husband was faithful.

But unless, there is an extremely valid reason, couples "hardly remain faithful"

I think that couples normally have to overcome an obstacle to understand their value to one another, before they both decide to "remain faithful" until they both experience a specific hardship, then Monogamy in my opinion is a Myth,

kinda agree with that

~Sauron~:

It wasn't cheating then cos they were bringing em home after legally married to them.
There was no secret about it. . . . .A village chief could have 8 women in his bedroom conveniently.
Polygamy was an accepted practise in em days.

There's a difference. . . . .Polygamy(it allows one to marry more than one wife)
Monogamy(you have to be with one at a time).

Valid argument but point being,

Though men marry ONE WIFE,  they practice" polygamy" with their concubines,  

Whether we name it polygamy and give it another name,  any man who experiences sexual relationship with any woman other than is first wife and this woman is not dead is cheating, hence the myth of monogamy.

posakosa:

Valid argument but point being,
Though men marry ONE WIFE,  they practice" polygamy" with their concubines,  
Whether we name it polygamy and give it another name,  any man who experiences sexual relationship with any woman other than is first wife and this woman is not dead is cheating, hence the myth of monogamy.

That's a GRAY area cos it ain't POLYGAMY until he marries them.

tope5000:

The whole meaning of a relationship is to stay together, to be there for each other, in good times and in bad times, to support and love each other unconditionally. For this to work, both partners must have faith in themselves that they can live up to this commitment, and faith in the partner to do this too.

This is theoretical. . . . . . .When does a man cross the line with another girl?
Sexual contact? Dancing dirty with a stripper or cyber sex?
At what point will you say your man has cheated??

To be faithful is simply to live up to your partner's faith in you. To be faithful is to never do anything that you don't want your partner to know about. If you have faith in your lover, you allow him/her to do anything s/he wants, as long as it is not against your wishes, and you rely on him/her to know your wishes. A faithful couple never has any secrets from each other, and they tell each other anything and everything that is of any importance.

U better start hosting shows for unfortunate women on ITV-4.

~Sauron~:

This is theoretical. . . . . . .When does a man cross the line with another girl?
Sexual contact? Dancing dirty with a stripper or cyber sex?
At what point will you say your man has cheated??

For me it has to me sexual contact i.e. groping, dirty dancing with any girl etc

U better start hosting shows for unfortunate women on ITV-4.

Lol . . . . what do i know

tope5000:

For me it has to me sexual contact i.e. groping, dirty dancing with any girl etc

So if you catch your partner yanking off his cock to other chics on the internet, it is not cheating??

~Sauron~:

So if you catch your partner yanking off his cock to other chics on the internet, it is not cheating??

~Sauron~:

So if you catch your partner yanking off his cock to other chics on the internet, it is not cheating??

To me that is madness . . . .he needs to chk into yaba left asap
Cheating is a very powerful thing . . . . u can cheat even with ur mind, u can be unfaithful even while having sex with ur wife or gf.

tope5000:

To me that is madness . . . .he needs to chk into yaba left asap
Cheating is a very powerful thing . . . . u can cheat even with ur mind, u can be unfaithful even while having sex with ur wife ur gf.

I agree cheating is powerful but what constitutes to cheating varies from person to person.
I know some women who do not agree MouthAction is cheating.

~Sauron~:

I agree cheating is powerful but what constitutes to cheating varies from person to person.
I know some women who do not agree MouthAction is cheating.

Well i am not one of those women . . . oral what??
If i catch my man involved in that nonsense . . . . i will castrate him str8

tope5000:

Well i am not one of those women . . . oral what??
If i catch my man involved in that nonsense . . . . i will castrate him str8

Well, if you were married, would you give him a chance ? , aren't married vows about "through thick and thin"

If you weree only dating ? won't you forgive ?

~Sauron~:

That's a GRAY area cos it ain't POLYGAMY until he marries them.

How is it a gray area, when he's sexing them,  he is "marrying them sexually spiritually and physically"  He might not be marrying them legally but he is marrying them in every other way, 

Included in the definition of marriage is "consumation" which im sure includes consentual sexual acts or relationship.

posakosa:


Well, if you were married, would you give him a chance ? , aren't married vows about "through thick and thin"

If you weree only dating ? won't you forgive ?

Bia . . . .wasnt cheating the reason why u said u wanted u EX dead?
Abi no u be the girl wey start that thread?

So why shud i forgive a cheater . . , once a cheat always a cheat

posakosa:

How is it a gray area, when he's sexing them,  he is "marrying them sexually spiritually and physically"  He might not be marrying them legally but he is marrying them in every other way, 
Included in the definition of marriage is "consumation" which im sure includes consentual sexual acts or relationship.

So in other words, sex is marriage?
Just when i thunk i have heard it all. . . . . . .We learn everyday.

tope5000:

Well i am not one of those women . . . oral what??
If i catch my man involved in that nonsense . . . . i will castrate him str8

Just letting you know some women are tolerant with such schitzos.
They believe sexual intercourse is the only thing close to cheating.
Different strokes for different folks. . . .Going to strip joints to touch boobs on a regular basis is not cheating to some women.

~Sauron~:

Just letting you know some women are tolerant with such schitzos.
They believe sexual intercourse is the only thing close to cheating.
Different strokes for different folks. . . .Going to strip joints to touch boobs on a regular basis is not cheating to some women.

I dont mind him going to strip joints not regularly tho but he must keep his hands to himself
or better still we go together.

~Sauron~:

So in other words, sex is marriage?
Just when i thunk i have heard it all. . . . . . .We learn everyday.

Im not in anyway stating that sex is marriage. I am saying that whether we give it the name another name or "polygamy", Sex with someone other than your first wife [if she's not dead] whether or not u're married, is as valid as "polygamy"

tope5000:

Bia . . . .wasnt cheating the reason why u said u wanted u EX dead?
Abi no u be the girl wey start that thread?

So why shud i forgive a cheater . . , once a cheat always a cheat

I agree with you "once a cheat, always a cheat" we should also note that people CAN change.

I wish my EX dead for several other valid reasons, other than cheating!

The reasons were clearly listed on the post

tope5000:

I dont mind him going to strip joints not regularly tho but he must keep his hands to himself
or better still we go together.

So you will let your partner pay to touch a woman's boobs or dip his finger in her tampon socket?
U might as well get him a LovePeddler he can shag every monday evening.
Tope, go and lie down. . . . .

posakosa:

Im not in anyway stating that sex is marriage. I am saying that whether we give it the name another name or "polygamy", Sex with someone other than your first wife [if she's not dead] whether or not u're married, is as valid as "polygamy"

Sex with someone other than one's wife is CHEATING/INFIDELITY.
It is not polygamy.

~Sauron~:

So you will let your partner pay to touch a woman's boobs or dip his finger in her tampon socket?
U might as well get him a LovePeddler he can shag every monday evening.
Tope, go and lie down. . . . .

What the big deal abt strip joints . . . .many husbands n wives go together[the kinky ones ] as long as he keep his hands to himself . . . . i dont see the big deal
Its bank holiday  . . . .i aint sleepy yet so i aint going bed

tope5000:

What the big deal abt strip joints . . . .many husbands n wives go together[the kinky ones ] as long as he keep his hands to himself . . . . i dont see the big deal

Hmmmmmm. . . . . .U are kinky.

Its bank holiday  . . . .i aint sleepy yet so i aint going bed

For shizzle, i completely forgot. . . . .Was thinking tomorrow is gon' be another stressful monday.

~Sauron~:

Hmmmmmm. . . . . .U are kinky.

I am NOT

For shizzle, i completely forgot. . . . .Was thinking tomorrow is gon' be another stressful monday.

I am waking up at 3pm tomorrow

how come you attract so many married men?

Hmmmm, Are the men to blame?? Women have played a part in this new trend too.

tope5000:

What the big deal abt strip joints . . . .many husbands n wives go together[the kinky ones ] as long as he keep his hands to himself . . . . i dont see the big deal
Its bank holiday  . . . .i aint sleepy yet so i aint going bed

shhhhhhh, , you are giving away your location.

its no myth but you have to be totally in sync with ur spouse to experience it