Hi NL, This is something that has been going on in my relationship for a long time now and have just been too scared to tell it to him for fear that he might think I'm one of those materialistic girls or gold diggers, who just wants him for his money. My bf and I have been dating for two years and so far, he's never bought me gifts (no mata how little). The only time he got me something was when we initially started dating of which he painfully told me it was expensive ( made it look like i was not worth spending that much on). Basically, I'm a giving type of person and i love it when he at least gives me stuffs and not seeing it as a burden. On his birthdays, i buys gifts for him, cake and make sacrifices for him and give him small gifts randomly (not on special occasions)

I do love him genuinely cos he's caring, affectionate, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes me out on  dates, makes me feel special and treats me very well. But it just makes me sad that i don't even have one thing in my possession that makes me proud to say was given to me by him. What I'm mostly concerned about is that he has a very good paying job and i feel bad that he doesn't spend on me. Sometimes i feel he's not that into me or is it that he just doesn't love me that much to want to spend on me. I've been the faithful, good and trustworthy girl, so i deserve to be treated more than this. I don't ask him for money whatsoever and he doesn't give me. I can't say I'm  that rich and at the same time I'm not poor, I'm satisfied with what i have, so i guess am not demanding. I don't know if he's being stingy or it's me that's just being unrealistic.

Pls Nldrs, what should i do in this situation cos it's really getting to me? Is he being stingy or careful with me not to spend anything on me (maybe from bad past experiences from girls). Do you think it might affect our relationship? pls kindly give your honest views about this.

Thanks for  reading!

I do love him genuinely cos he's caring, affectionate, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes me out on  dates, makes me feel special and treats me very well.

one of these days instead of a date at a restaurant. suggest going to the mall n see how he reacts. or just plain ask him to follow u to the mall sometime.
also, does he usually buy things for himself? does he talk about money often? if no, then maybe he's just not into spending. some guys just can't be bothered abt material possessions.
and ur username worries me. lol maybe u shld be with someone else.

I do love him genuinely cos he's caring, affectionate, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes me out on dates, makes me feel special and treats me very well.

if he were spending his money on someone else, u would feel some deficiencies in these areas as well^
so i think u can safely rule that out.

but does he give u gifts that u cld consider inexpensive but invaluable?
ex. if music is his favorite past time or hobby and he made u a CD of a compilation of his fav songs etc stuff like that

Prada_gal:

Hi NL, This is something that has been going on in my relationship for a long time now and have just been too scared to tell it to him for fear that he might think I'm one of those materialistic girls or gold diggers, who just wants him for his money. My bf and I have been dating for two years and so far, he's never bought me gifts (no mata how little). The only time he got me something was when we initially started dating of which he painfully told me it was expensive ( made it look like i was not worth spending that much on). Basically, I'm a giving type of person and i love it when he at least gives me stuffs and not seeing it as a burden. On his birthdays, i buys gifts for him, cake and make sacrifices for him and give him small gifts randomly (not on special occasions)

I do love him genuinely cos he's caring, affectionate, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes me out on  dates, makes me feel special and treats me very well. But it just makes me sad that i don't even have one thing in my possession that makes me proud to say was given to me by him. What I'm mostly concerned about is that he has a very good paying job and i feel bad that he doesn't spend on me. Sometimes i feel he's not that into me or is it that he just doesn't love me that much to want to spend on me. I've been the faithful, good and trustworthy girl, so i deserve to be treated more than this. I don't ask him for money whatsoever and he doesn't give me. I can't say I'm  that rich and at the same time I'm not poor, I'm satisfied with what i have, so i guess am not demanding. I don't know if he's being stingy or it's me that's just being unrealistic.

Pls Nldrs, what should i do in this situation cos it's really getting to me? Is he being stingy or careful with me not to spend anything on me (maybe from bad past experiences from girls). Do you think it might affect our relationship? pls kindly give your honest views about this.

Thanks for  reading!

i am truly lost in what you wrote, is it the gesture you are missing or the gift itself. is there something lacking in this relationship apart from him spending on you? why dont you accept that maybe he saves his money to buy a home or whatever a young man might want to do with his own money. you said you were neither rich or poor, why dont you do the deed and buy him something that he is proud of.  can you safely say that he has something in his possession that you got him that he can look at and be proud of? you bought him a cake/ made sacrifices and then expect to get a shopping spree at Prada?!
would it make a difference if he cooked you dinner at his place or gave you a gift he made by himself?
where did this spending for merit coming from? its not like you need it, right?
i am tired of hearing people calling guys who are "careful" stingy. so what about if he is saving his money, is that a crime? maybe you guys dont have the same goals.
what dont you tell him how you feel and see what he says. you already know that he doesnt like spending big money on gifts so brace yourself for his reply.
your relationship shouldnt be based on how much money or gifts he spends on you. if you are not comfortable with a guy like that, then maybe you should look for someone more generous. the bolded parts should have made you happy and content in this relationship.

Prada_gal:

Hi NL, This is something that has been going on in my relationship for a long time now and have just been too scared to tell it to him for fear that he might think I'm one of those materialistic girls or gold diggers, who just wants him for his money. My bf and I have been dating for two years and so far, he's never bought me gifts (no mata how little). The only time he got me something was when we initially started dating of which he painfully told me it was expensive ( made it look like i was not worth spending that much on). Basically, I'm a giving type of person and i love it when he at least gives me stuffs and not seeing it as a burden. On his birthdays, i buys gifts for him, cake and make sacrifices for him and give him small gifts randomly (not on special occasions)

I do love him genuinely cos he's caring, affectionate, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes me out on dates, makes me feel special and treats me very well. But it just makes me sad that i don't even have one thing in my possession that makes me proud to say was given to me by him. What I'm mostly concerned about is that he has a very good paying job and i feel bad that he doesn't spend on me. Sometimes i feel he's not that into me or is it that he just doesn't love me that much to want to spend on me. I've been the faithful, good and trustworthy girl, so i deserve to be treated more than this. I don't ask him for money whatsoever and he doesn't give me. I can't say I'm that rich and at the same time I'm not poor, I'm satisfied with what i have, so i guess am not demanding. I don't know if he's being stingy or it's me that's just being unrealistic.

Pls Nldrs, what should i do in this situation cos it's really getting to me? Is he being stingy or careful with me not to spend anything on me (maybe from bad past experiences from girls). Do you think it might affect our relationship? pls kindly give your honest views about this.

Thanks for reading!

Hey Prada Girl why don't you get a good paying job and stop waiting on a "boyfriend" to buy you possession you will be proud of? Have you bought him something he will be proud of or are you like and ambulance always crying mi waan mi waan

SeanT21:

i see ur confusion sis, i wouldn't make head or tail from it myself 

Prada_gal:

Hi NL, This is something that has been going on in my relationship for a long time now and have just been too scared to tell it to him for fear that he might think I'm one of those materialistic girls or gold diggers, who just wants him for his money. My bf and I have been dating for two years and so far, he's never bought me gifts (no mata how little). The only time he got me something was when we initially started dating of which he painfully told me it was expensive ( made it look like i was not worth spending that much on). Basically, I'm a giving type of person and i love it when he at least gives me stuffs and not seeing it as a burden. On his birthdays, i buys gifts for him, cake and make sacrifices for him and give him small gifts randomly (not on special occasions)

I do love him genuinely cos he's caring, affectionate, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes me out on  dates, makes me feel special and treats me very well. But it just makes me sad that i don't even have one thing in my possession that makes me proud to say was given to me by him. What I'm mostly concerned about is that he has a very good paying job and i feel bad that he doesn't spend on me. Sometimes i feel he's not that into me or is it that he just doesn't love me that much to want to spend on me. I've been the faithful, good and trustworthy girl, so i deserve to be treated more than this. I don't ask him for money whatsoever and he doesn't give me. I can't say I'm  that rich and at the same time I'm not poor, I'm satisfied with what i have, so i guess am not demanding. I don't know if he's being stingy or it's me that's just being unrealistic.

Pls Nldrs, what should i do in this situation cos it's really getting to me? Is he being stingy or careful with me not to spend anything on me (maybe from bad past experiences from girls). Do you think it might affect our relationship? pls kindly give your honest views about this.

Thanks for  reading!

madam, kindly rewrite this story or look for a better lie than this to gist us, ur story is full of contradictions and u are a poor liar, and worse still, u will never graduate from gold digging school.  arrant nonsense! 

lol go easy on her.
the girl just wants prada shoes for her bday. is dat too much to ask for?

Well, why dont you tell him that u want to spend a day of going out with him just for one day. Go out to shops / shopping malls and point at a teddy (something not that expensive but you think its cute and memorable) and tell him this:


AWWWWW. . . . How cute!!! Baby, can u buy that for me pleaseeeeeee. . . , I think that if you buy it for me, it will be the most special thing on earth cause I know u are the one whom give it to me as my first ever gift from u and Ill cherish it to the fullest.

And you make that cute puppy look. . .

And when he buys it for you than you ask him, o yes, I was wondering. How come u dont buy me gifts as cute as this? And you make the sad face like this


There you go! Try it and get back to us sharp sharp!

Gabry:

Well, why dont you tell him that u want to spend a day of going out with him just for one day. Go out to shops / shopping malls and point at a teddy (something not that expensive but you think its cute and memorable) and tell him this:
AWWWWW. . . . How cute!!! Baby, can u buy that for me pleaseeeeeee. . . , I think that if you buy it for me, it will be the most special thing on earth cause I know u are the one whom give it to me as my first ever gift from u and Ill cherish it to the fullest.
And you make that cute puppy look. . .
And when he buys it for you than you ask him, o yes, I was wondering. How come u dont buy me gifts as cute as this? And you make the sad face like this
There you go! Try it and get back to us sharp sharp!

poster aint looking for some cheap teddybear gift, she want the "big money gifts".
i guess this woman will never be satisfied until he spends all his salary buying her Prada shoes and the (real) Gucci bags so she can have something to be "proud of"

MRbrownJAY:

poster aint looking for some cheap teddybear gift, she want the "big money gifts".
i guess this woman will never be satisfied until he spends all his salary buying her Prada shoes and the (real) Gucci bags so she can have something to be "proud of"

Are u sure about that? But I thought the poster said she only wanted a gift at least cause she hast got any but she gave alot to him

Gabry:

Are u sure about that? But I thought the poster said she only wanted a gift at least cause she hast got any but she gave alot to him 

is baking a cake and making time for someone "a lot"? by what she wrote, we can clearly understand what kind of gifts she is looking for and it aint cheap teddy bear, look at how she described the first "gift" he got her.she wrote:"

made it look like i was not worth spending that much on. Basically, I'm a giving type of person and i love it when he at least gives me stuffs and not seeing it as a burden. On his birthdays, i buys gifts for him, cake and make sacrifices for him and give him small gifts randomly (not on special occasions)"

i dont know what he bought before but in HER mind, that aint enough and he should spend much more because "she is worth it". what she doesnt understand is that the fact that she is a "giving type" doesnt automatically mean that the person in front of her has to reciprocate. obviously she value this relationship with the amount that man will spend on her because  after all the care, affection, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes her out on dates, makes her feel special and treats her very well she is still sad that she doesnt have a"valuable" token of his love that would make her proud. i guess all the stuff i just mentioned is automatically void if no gifts are given.

the worst part of this girl post is this:

What I'm mostly concerned about is that he has a very good paying job and i feel bad that he doesn't spend on me. Sometimes i feel he's not that into me or is it that he just doesn't love me that much to want to spend on me.

so in her mind, to show love you have to SPEND money on her with expensive valuable gifts. this post is just about money, nothing more. she should have gone and sell herself in an auction to the highest bidder.

and then she wrote that silly part which was the nail in her coffin:

I've been the faithful, good and trustworthy girl, so i deserve to be treated more than this

bloody hell, where do they find these kind of low life?! so now, a man has to reward someone who is trustworthy, good and faithful?! is it not compulsory in relationship?! or am i missing something? ROTFLMAO
you see in this girls mind, all he did/doing/will do counts for nothing. affectionate, caring, good etc ZERO! the only thing she values is how much he is willing to spend on her. period!

oyinda.:

lol go easy on her.
the girl just wants prada shoes for her bday. is dat too much to ask for?

take wetin easy? can't u see how confused the poster is? this is what happens when ASSU strikes and people are left to watch yoruba movies and hollywood movies at the same time

@POST.

Whereva's that "auto-slap" feature. . .now i'm seriously thinking about smackin someone's brain SILLY!!!

@Poster:

I dont like girls like u, i really dont. You are there wondering if he's spending on another girl, u remind me of an ex who would even frown when i sent money to my own mum. . . and that was just annoying.

whitelexi:

@Poster:

I dont like girls like u, i really dont. You are there wondering if he's spending on another girl, u remind me of an ex who would even frown when i sent money to my own mum. . . and that was just annoying.

Now, that's a str8 VISA. . .outta my house N life. . .Good Lord, have mercy on the girl would EVEN do that to me

For someone ive dated for two years, i'd be bold enough to tell him by now ''dear why dont you give gifts, i appreciate the dates and all but sometimes i wonder why you dont buy me small stuff the way i do for you''
He may not see anything wrong in what he is doing, in times past perhaps no ex ever brought it to his notice thats the reason why we keep learning from people no one knows it all. Be bold tell him

What are people hitting the poster hard for? Every lady in a loving relationship likes to be surprised with little gifts every now and then (when she does so herself ohhhhhhhhh) She has clearly stated

''I don't ask him for money whatsoever and he doesn't give me. I can't say I'm  that rich and at the same time I'm not poor, I'm satisfied with what i have, so i guess am not demanding''

i dont see anything wrong with the poster as long as you're not longing for gifts like cars, houses, laptops, new phones, designers this and that etc

whitelexi:

@Poster:

I dont like girls like u, i really dont. You are there wondering if he's spending on another girl, u remind me of an ex who would even frown when i sent money to my own mum. . .  and that was just annoying.

FIRE! ! ! u no kill am? 

touchmeder:

What are people hitting the poster hard for? Every lady in a loving relationship likes to be surprised with little gifts every now and then (when she does so herself ohhhhhhhhh) She has clearly stated
''I don't ask him for money whatsoever and he doesn't give me. I can't say I'm  that rich and at the same time I'm not poor, I'm satisfied with what i have, so i guess am not demanding''
i dont see anything wrong with the poster as long as you're not longing for gifts like cars, houses, laptops, new phones, designers this and that etc

obviously she is not satisfied with what she has, if she were these gifts wouldnt be such a problem. see how she talk shit about the first gift she got from him(then you wonder why the guy dont want to give her anything anymore).
is it not suppose to be the gesture that matters? (not in her world) then they are quick to bring the STINGY card.
its the guys wallet, the guys money, he thought it was expensive but she thought not, what a crazy world, then why doesnt she pay for it then?!

MRbrownJAY:

is baking a cake and making time for someone "a lot"? by what she wrote, we can clearly understand what kind of gifts she is looking for and it aint cheap teddy bear, look at how she described the first "gift" he got her.she wrote:"
i dont know what he bought before but in HER mind, that aint enough and he should spend much more because "she is worth it". what she doesnt understand is that the fact that she is a "giving type" doesnt automatically mean that the person in front of her has to reciprocate. obviously she value this relationship with the amount that man will spend on her because  after all the care, affection, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes her out on dates, makes her feel special and treats her very well she is still sad that she doesnt have a"valuable" token of his love that would make her proud. i guess all the stuff i just mentioned is automatically void if no gifts are given.

the worst part of this girl post is this: so in her mind, to show love you have to SPEND money on her with expensive valuable gifts. this post is just about money, nothing more. she should have gone and sell herself in an auction to the highest bidder.

and then she wrote that silly part which was the nail in her coffin: bloody hell, where do they find these kind of low life?! so now, a man has to reward someone who is trustworthy, good and faithful?! is it not compulsory in relationship?! or am i missing something? ROTFLMAO
you see in this girls mind, all he did/doing/will do counts for nothing. affectionate, caring, good etc ZERO! the only thing she values is how much he is willing to spend on her. period!

I would want to agree with you but on the other hand, Im somehow agreeing with her.

You see, she did not say she wanted expensive gifts at all. We all know that he takes her out on a date. Yes!

But in a relationship, at times you drop by a mall or a store, dont you ever think about your bf/ gf? I know I do! Everytime I drop by a store and I see shirts or jeans or hats or wallet or shoes or any other things, I would always want to buy for my bf even if its cheap. But I dont really calculate. Its nice of the guy to bring her out on dates but to not buy her any gifts at alll is a little bit weird dont you think?    


Unless if the poster's bf is the type whom does not like going to shops to pick out gifts than I can understand that.


Poster, I disagree with you on the part where you said u deserve more than that cause mind u, if you're not worth it, he wouldnt even bring you out for nice dinners!! Mind u, my bf does not bring me out for nice dinners its because he loves home cook food instead. As for gifts, well. . . The beggining of our relationship, he gives me KEYCHAINS all the time and Im like okay! So I just colelcted them and I come to realize that those keychains has nice designs!! and people has been asking me to give it to them cause they love the designs. Im not a keychain person but no way am I giving it to them Ill just have to accept it and appreciate it cause it has been given by him. Now he buys me teddy's which is on discounted rate. (Dont blame him, we both are money contious people!) and when he managed to collect more money last 2 months, he bought me an IPOD, my first expensive gift and I almost cried. . .

But what makes him the most special bf is that he is not demanding, he is not lazy, he cooks for me on special occasions like my Birthday     and above all, he is funny.

Poster, u just gotta learn how to appreciate your bf in terms of non monetary otherwise I would say you no be serious jor. . .  

MRbrownJAY:

obviously she is not satisfied with what she has, if she were these gifts wouldnt be such a problem. see how she talk shit about the first gift she got from him(then you wonder why the guy dont want to give her anything anymore).
is it not suppose to be the gesture that matters? (not in her world) then they are quick to bring the STINGY card.
its the guys wallet, the guys money, he thought it was expensive but she thought not, what a crazy world, then why doesnt she pay for it then?!

i have gone back to read what you mean she meant by ''talking shit about the first gift''
i dont see the shit you speak of this is what she said 'The only time he got me something was when we initially started dating of which he painfully told me it was expensive ( made it look like i was not worth spending that much on)''
where did she ridicule the gift in that statement? i dont see anything wrong in what the poster would like to have in her relationship. We learn everyday one might think they have everything covered up but to your present gf its not so. Your ex might never had seen anything wrong in it.

if he aint getting u gift's then he's just not the gift type.
afterall u say he takes u out and is caring and loving towards you.

you cant have it all u know. make do with wat u got, and stop complaining.

izeek:

if he aint getting u gift's then he's just not the gift type.
afterall u say he takes u out and is caring and loving towards you.

you cant have it all u know. make do with wat u got, and stop complaining.

GBAM!! House. . .need we say more

If your so bothered about the issue. . .then I do not think your being chained to date him.

Sometimes u try in an honest way to make a slight change. . .  That slight change could upset the ante and u kiss your 2yrs relationship goodbye.

If he has been taking u out on dates, caring and loving as u say he is, then why not let things be the way they are? Do u honestly think he doesn't know he has not really bought u gifts? after 2 yrs?
You know, i can relate with the guy in question because i'm that type, I feel it will be good to buy gifts but only when i see a particular level of commitment like. . .  say, an engagement or even further more. I will be happy to take a girl out while we are dating, but at that stage i dont owe u anything gift-wise. If u feel ok with getting me small gifts, thats fine but u cannot demand anything of the like.

@Poster: if u like this guy, do yourself a favour and ditch this crazy and thoughtless risk you're about embarking.

_{Let those who have ears listen}

touchmeder:

i have gone back to read what you mean she meant by ''talking shit about the first gift''
i dont see the shit you speak of this is what she said 'The only time he got me something was when we initially started dating of which he painfully told me it was expensive ( made it look like i was not worth spending that much on)''
where did she ridicule the gift in that statement? i dont see anything wrong in what the poster would like to have in her relationship. We learn everyday one might think they have everything covered up but to your present gf its not so. Your ex might never had seen anything wrong in it.

you are not reading it clearly, here is what she starts by saying: so far, he's never bought me gifts (no mata how little) and thereafter she mention the gift like it is not worth mentioning. this is unacceptable LOL, especially when we hear that the guy thought the gift was expensive.

i am sorry but in a mans world, if we buy you a gift, no matter how little, we would like that gift to be recognized and not mentioned as if you never received anything. saying it like that means that the gift is worthless.

there is absolutely nothing wrong with what she would like to have, everybody can wish for stuff but to demand it like its a man's duty is wrong. lets hear what she has given him apart from baking a bloody cake and spare time for him?
some men hand gifts, others treat ladies the right way (like the poster)  and yes sometimes others will do both. we all know how it goes after the first gift.
ps, some women dont deserve gifts and some guys dont care about gifts, its just that simple.

ThoniaSlim:

If your so bothered about the issue. . .then I do not think your being chained to date him.  

whitelexi:

Sometimes u try in an honest way to make a slight change. . .  That slight change could upset the ante and u kiss your 2yrs relationship goodbye.

If he has been taking u out on dates, caring and loving as u say he is, then why not let things be the way they are? Do u honestly think he doesn't know he has not really bought u gifts? after 2 yrs?
You know, i can relate with the guy in question because i'm that type, I feel it will be good to buy gifts but only when i see a particular level of commitment like. . .  say, an engagement or even further more. I will be happy to take a girl out while we are dating, but at that stage i dont owe u anything gift-wise. If u feel ok with getting me small gifts, thats fine but u cannot demand anything of the like.

@Poster: if u like this guy, do yourself a favour and ditch this crazy and thoughtless risk you're about embarking.

_{Let those who have ears listen}

mmmmmmmmmmm. i wonder why she thinks he is not doing enough.

Prada_gal:

Hi NL, This is something that has been going on in my relationship for a long time now and have just been too scared to tell it to him for fear that he might think I'm one of those materialistic girls or gold diggers, who just wants him for his money. My bf and I have been dating for two years and so far, he's never bought me gifts (no mata how little). The only time he got me something was when we initially started dating of which he painfully told me it was expensive ( made it look like i was not worth spending that much on). Basically, I'm a giving type of person and i love it when he at least gives me stuffs and not seeing it as a burden. On his birthdays, i buys gifts for him, cake and make sacrifices for him and give him small gifts randomly (not on special occasions)

I do love him genuinely cos he's caring, affectionate, humorous,a wonderful person and a whole lot more. He takes me out on  dates, makes me feel special and treats me very well. But it just makes me sad that i don't even have one thing in my possession that makes me proud to say was given to me by him. What I'm mostly concerned about is that he has a very good paying job and i feel bad that he doesn't spend on me. Sometimes i feel he's not that into me or is it that he just doesn't love me that much to want to spend on me. I've been the faithful, good and trustworthy girl, so i deserve to be treated more than this. I don't ask him for money whatsoever and he doesn't give me. I can't say I'm  that rich and at the same time I'm not poor, I'm satisfied with what i have, so i guess am not demanding. I don't know if he's being stingy or it's me that's just being unrealistic.

Pls Nldrs, what should i do in this situation cos it's really getting to me? Is he being stingy or careful with me not to spend anything on me (maybe from bad past experiences from girls). Do you think it might affect our relationship? pls kindly give your honest views about this.

Thanks for  reading!

ms prada, how much do you think this guy earns?

MRbrownJAY:

you are not reading it clearly, here is what she starts by saying: so far, he's never bought me gifts (no mata how little) and thereafter she mention the gift like it is not worth mentioning. this is unacceptable LOL, especially when we hear that the guy thought the gift was expensive.

i am sorry but in a mans world, if we buy you a gift, no matter how little, we would like that gift to be recognized and not mentioned as if you never received anything. saying it like that means that the gift is worthless.

there is absolutely nothing wrong with what she would like to have, everybody can wish for stuff but to demand it like its a man's duty is wrong. lets hear what she has given him apart from baking a bloody cake and spare time for him?
some men hand gifts, others treat ladies the right way (like the poster)  and yes sometimes others will do both. we all know how it goes after the first gift.
ps, some women dont deserve gifts and some guys dont care about gifts, its just that simple.

bolded part is true but when you are nigerian it is commonly accepted that you pay for the pleasure of saying hi. i remember an ex g/f mum who tot it was normal to keeing asking me for ticket a year after me and her daughter parted ways. our society is wired to be a taking society.

Men are from Mars women are from Venus

Na wa oo!
@poster
which 1 be ur probs sef? D fact dat he's nt buyn gifts or d fact dat he doesnt spend @all. Wel gues u've dated dis guy 4 2yrs so ur meant 2 no his capabilities lyk knwing if he is d gift type or nt. Permit me 2 say ur nt d undastand type cos if u ar, guez dis shldnt be a probs @all.

@ everyone,

First of all, let me state here that my Username has nothing to do with my Personality, i'm nothing even close to a materialistic or demanding type of person (he knows it and luvs me for it). I luv him for who he is and not what i can get from him. Thanks for bashing me and making me look like a convict and materialistic person. I never said i don't appreciate all the things he's done for me. He is a good person, that i thank God for. I'm not saying that he should spend all he's got on me, I don't even know how much he earns. I always show sincere appreciation for EVERYTHING he does for me including that first gift and he knows.

I guess he's not the gift type of person like some of you have said, i just thought one of the ways Love is usually expressed with is Giving. Sometimes i feel sad when my own thoughtful gestures are not reciprocated.It would make me feel special if he at least gives me something for my birthday. I don't want a car, a designer shoe, bag or an expensive wristwatch. What i cherish most is the gesture in it than the gift itself (that don't mata but the gesture).

You should ask him to get his mum something special and see his reaction first

Hi,

It was really cool going through your post my sister. I have also painstakingly gone through the replies of people here. Some I find interesting and others I find rather annoying!

We are all entitled to our own opinions but we should be reasonable and realistic in our talks and thoughts! I don’t see her as being mamaterialisticr anything like that and she does not need to be poor or needy for her BF to buy her things! She does not need to ask him either for him to do that!

Giving to the people we love is part of loving whether you agree with me or not! You can give without loving but you can’t love without giving. If this guy does not have the money it is a different thing! If he really cares about our sister, I see no reason why he should not spend money on her. Someone said that he might have a “project” or that is being “careful” and people are misconstruinmisconstruing“stingy”. Bullshit!

Who is fooling who? Is either our guy is outrightly stingy or does not care about our sister! PERIOD! He Does Not Have To Have So much to buy her things AND HE DID NOT HAVE ANY RIGHT OR MORAL JUSTIFICATION (wJUSTIFICATION BUY HER SOMETHING AND TELL HER HOW EXPENSIVE THE GIFT WAS! That was the cruelest, uncivilized and antisocial behavior I have ever heard! How expensive or cheap a gift is is immaterial; the bottom line is the heart and thoughtfulness othoughtfulnessd the appreciative natappreciative the receiver!

Giving is something that some people have in them and some does not have and does not see the need to learn either! A life without giving and givers will be a monumental bore! It is not possible for us to love and care for someone without wanting to get them things. Some ladies are materialistic thmaterialistict and am not here to defend such girls! Having dated our sister for two years haba! What else does he need to know or find out about her and been materialistic? Smaterialisticeed to ask him for him to give her either!

I take my wife out from time to time even when it is not convenient! And she respects me for that! Sometimes she sponsors such outings! How can we profess love and not give to the people we love? How can we profess love and wait until they ask for things? We don’t need that! He should from time to time surprise her positively not until there is a birthday, valentine or any festivity or anniversary for that matter!  If they just met one might (just might) be tempted to say that our guy is taking his time and all! But for two years? Haba! E get as e be my people!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally, you don’t give gifts to people because they are needy or hungry or to impress them or to buy their love and attention; no we give to show them that we care and treasure them! We give to show our love and appreciation and to sappreciationy mean to us.

Thank you for this opportunity to write and I apologize for it is a lengthy one alright!!!!!


JULIAN.

PS. I can’t say if he is spending on someone else but fact is that if he really cares, he will always get you things – no matter how small it is!!!!!!!!