Pheals:
Congratulations bro !! SHe told u the truth after all na months not years ..the choice is yours , who knows the child might prosper in future if u render help then u will reap it instead of her father who will later regret

how about if the child turn radical and kill the guy instead of his own father?

missyadorable:


Stigmas in our society

1.Pregnancy outside/without wedlock

2.Being a spinster

So madam,being a baby mama has too many disadvantages including school drop out and stigmatization.

I rather abort than have a child without marriage #justsaying

I will never be a baby mama nor use a baby to tie a man down but my dear you don't know what life holds for us. 95% of baby mama's didn't plan to be one too, it was just circumstances.

Pumpkin34:
I will never be a baby mama nor use a baby to tie a man down but my dear you don't know what life holds for us. 95% of baby mama's didn't plan to be one too, it was just circumstances.

I can't and don't agree with you.Many ladies nowadays use pregnancies to tie men down,into marrying them.it has worked for a lot.some are just unfortunate..The point is pregnancy without marriage is a shame,dont be a victim of single motherhood....prevention is better than cure.I knew life doesn't hold being a baby mama for me.A teenager knows if she has unprotected sex with a man,she may get pregnant,how can you say adult females don't know what life holds for them?if you don't know yours,i know mine and being a baby mama is not one.i got married properly before pregnancy came, so spare me that talk

missyadorable:


I can't and don't agree with you.Many ladies nowadays use pregnancies to tie men down,into marrying them.it has worked for a lot.some are just unfortunate..The point is pregnancy without marriage is a shame,dont be a victim of single motherhood....prevention is better than cure.I knew life doesn't hold being a baby mama for me.A teenager knows if she has unprotected sex with a man,she may get pregnant,how can you say adult females don't know what life holds for them?if you don't know yours,i know mine and being a baby mama is not one.i got married properly before pregnancy came, so spare me that talk

I kinda agree with you, as for me baby mama is not for me but I can't just stigmatize them.

OP, if you are nt comfortable with it,then leave her,she will get a better dude.

That's what they call one chance

My question is what if that girls father comes begging please what's the OPs faith .!!!

I admire her first for not aborting that beautiful baby.. i sure know that lots of girls would have terminated the pregnancy... secondly she is decent enough to tell you .if you love her i don't think this should be an issue. though you should be prepared to accommodate the baby daddy in their lives.

doughziay:



Not rape or unfavourable circumstances dear

She dated the guy for 3years and blamed the incident on 'mistake'

But why would ladies who have a child or two decide to be silent about it until u are deep down in the relationship?

What's the difference saying it at the beginning or after a long period of time. To me, they are the same.

I' M NOT SURE YOU EVER LOVED HER IN THE FIRST PLACE. WHAT DOES IT MATTER IF SHE HAS A CHILD OR NOT? AFTERALL SHE STILL TOLD YOU EVEN IF YOU HAD DATED HER FOR A WHILE OR WERE YOU EXPECTING A NORMAL PERSON TO JUST BLURT IT OUT TO YOU FROM THE START THAT SHE HAS A CHILD.
BROS IF U DNT LIKE HER, ABEG LET HER BE AND STOP LOOKING FOR EXCUSES TO BREAK UP WITH THE THE LADY

She should have told you from the beginning if she truly loves you.

ellacute45:
She should have told you from the beginning if she truly loves you.

As if u would do the same

doughziay:
I dated this young lady for some months and things were going on fine until recently she told me she would like to discuss something with me and told me to promise her that it wouldn't change my attitude towards her.

She said she Has an 8year Old daughter already which made her drop out of school to take care of the child. The father of the child didn't take responsibility. She and her parents have been taking care of the child who's now 8yrs Old.

MY QUESTION: What would you do if you were in My shoes. Marry a single mom or Let her be.

op if you did't want her give her to me,i will marry her

If you are compatible with each other, you can go ahead and marry her. It's not a crime dude.

madgoat:


As if u would do the same

yea

She's a sincere type, but the choice is still yours. If you love her, then go ahead since the baby is a girl and only 8yrs, you may end up being proud of her.

If you truly loves her, marry her please.

it takes a real man to stand up to that responsibility and raise another man's kid.

if you do so, your wife will be indebted to you forever and her respect for you will know no bounds.

she could have kept it from you, and she could even have aborted the baby. she loves you and that's all that matters really. we all make mistakes and have things we regret in our lives.

the question is, do you love her that much?

falconey:
Had that experience 6years ago, i found out after we had sex.


seriously i cant date a baby mama talk of marry her, common she is a BABY MAMA!!!!!! someone's mother.

...and so

Some persons keep encouraging people to marry a lady out of pity. Let me not talk abeg. We should always do the right thing, No matter what.

dECEIT,

I met a lady myself and the first time i went to visit her, she made sure her child was around to greet me when i visited her which tells the whole story. i still sherish her move till today. that is the kind of person that will not want to hurt your feelings again

Exactly what am looking for.

Op she probably didnt want you to know due to stigma being single mum etc

But now you must love her after time went by ,, nothing has changed yes u round out she's got a kid but i think you can still marry her be a father the child never had and u can still have kids of your own .. God would bless you more


Sometimes some guys dont take responsibility n by default lady does all but its up to good guys like u to do the right thing regardless.. [awwwwwwnnnnn ur a sweet heart [color=#006600][/color]]

op don't let society stop u in ur pursuit of happiness, dey are always gon talk whether u doing bad or good
follow ur heart & God's guidance, that girl u want to follow with no kid u donno how many times she's committed abortion but this one had d guts to keep it
she's a keeper IMO

Good girl I guess she is sincere to have told you about her past,some girls will even hide it I will encourage you to Go ahead with her. Some of them are more kept and OK than most single girls around .

falconey:
Had that experience 6years ago, i found out after we had sex.


seriously i cant date a baby mama talk of marry her, common she is a BABY MAMA!!!!!! someone's mother.

so because she is baby mama what does that change about her?

doughziay:
I dated this young lady for some months and things were going on fine until recently she told me she would like to discuss something with me and told me to promise her that it wouldn't change my attitude towards her.

She said she Has an 8year Old daughter already which made her drop out of school to take care of the child. The father of the child didn't take responsibility. She and her parents have been taking care of the child who's now 8yrs Old.

MY QUESTION: What would you do if you were in My shoes. Marry a single mom or Let her be.

If she's a good girl, watch her attitude, if she's replaceable then dump her, but if her personality and attitude is wonderful and you know she's hard to replace then stay with her.

Sleekyshuga:
This is a very sensitive case as it involves an 8 years old child.. I am always of the opinion of baring it all (especially, the most important aspect of courtship) before going into something serious to avoid stories that touch..

But seriously, why hide a child save you have an ulterior motive.. A man/woman who will love you will trail along if Mr. A wasn't cool with it..

@ OP, the ball is in your court.. Weigh your options.. If you can, why not!


This is where we get it wrong.. It changes nothing, trust me.. You don't have to wait to know if a man will date you or not before you spill something this sensitive.. It's seriously no biggie.. Even in the process of knowing yourselves, you can chip it in..-- 'Look, I have an 8 years old daughter.' bla...bla...bla... It saves you from later regrets..

very true.Only wicked people hide such secrets from their spouse.Any man/woman who can't accept ur child is not worth it.Anyone should be proud enough to flaunt their child.

BumBae:

Yes it is
Especially in NIGeria

You think its part of our culture to be having babies without man or marriage or stability .. If its not y do alot of wayward chics go n abort if its ok to be single mum

Pls dont give bad advice

ok, but it is in our culture to abort babies abi?for ur mind u dey talk sense be dat.

babdav2015:
ok, but it is in our culture to abort babies abi?for ur mind u dey talk sense be dat.

Stfu if u dont have anything sensible dont quote me

Where did u see me say abort Thats how u fail exams simple english u cant understand ..... No one swid anything about abortion yet u take dat dickhead hand of your n ur typing trash ..
U berra mind urself .. N go quote those bimbos dat think u make any sense useless boy

BumBae:

Stfu if u dont have anything sensible dont quote me

Where did u see me say abort Thats how u fail exams simple english u cant understand ..... No one swid anything about abortion yet u take dat dickhead hand of your n ur typing trash ..
U berra mind urself .. N go quote those bimbos dat think u make any sense useless boy

I'll train u for free coz it's obvious u lack manners.

Follow your heart brother

Stay away from single mama.....
You will regret one day.......

Marrying single mama is the biggest mistake.....

Why dealing with old car while new one are available.....