Ray360:

Bro, Do you know that passion-seasoned love is actually the rationale behind some people sticking with a partner despite the partner's many shortcomings? When you love someone passionately, infinitesimal wrongs and even mammoth wrongs are played down and overlooked. Not because the person is too fragile to walk away, but because there is a deeper part of that person that is rooted in the other party. the passion you described that fades in month is mere infatuation. when it comes to true and refined love, The passion burns like an inferno which cannot be tamed easily.

I concurr intoto..

Things one cannot condone for one person, he condones for another.

VickyRotex:
I'm a Nigerian. So I'm answering your question with a question.

How do you know the quantity of love "enough" to marry a Man?


PS: I learnt it takes morethan loving a Spouse to say
"I do"

if he has a fat bank account, that's what naija ladies are interested in.

pinkpebbles:
The quantity? You know all doz kinda love dt makes u quiver wen wen u think abt d person. I think that is enof for me if u ask me

Why do you want to shiver...?? Do you have malaria...!!

Stop deceiving ursef, all those shivering stuffs only exists in novels...

why do some people seek advice from the wrong source?
what level of brain power does the op operate on?

romance section for that mata....

chai!!!

I weep for my generation.

Joavid:
why do some people seek advice from the wrong source?

what level of brain power does the op operate on?


romance section for that mata....


chai!!!


I weep for my generation.

oya sorry, no cry abeg

pinkpebbles:
Hes not cute. Buh he is nice

I'm sure you have had numerous cute Ex'es, what stops you from marrying just one?

Women self. Hmmm

LuveU2:
I can manage him if he is cute

op, pls and pls before men knew what love was, marriages have been existing and they went well or sour, not depending on love, no no.. but on the two partner s involved. you have to know what you want, he has to know what he wants,you have to know what he wants, he has to know what you want. from your post its clear you don't know what you want. whether love, or money or his character. how then would he satisfy you when you wouldn't know when you're satisfied? in my opinion your not ready for marriage yet. else you wouldn't be asking this. go sit down and find out what you want in the marriage, consider what he is offering, both his good and bad sides. is it something you can cope with? cuts marriage is mainly about tolerance, consider what your offering too.as for now ur offering him an unstable mind, one not ready for marriage. finally ask urself if u r ready, Cuz marriage is for better and for worse, know that people change, marriage would change him and you also, those things u saw in him that you liked or hated may and may not disappear. in truth no one is ever fully prepared for what is to come but you must be prepared to hold on till death do you part. and already you seem like ur one leg in and out.

pinkpebbles:
Again, I see ur reasons. And as a young lady that wants to get into marriage, you guys are ar confusin me.

just marry the man you are crazy in lust with, tall, dark, rich and handsome. But pray he will be nice to you.

I dnt understand why women look 4 love..wen it's easy for dem to fall In and out of it....if u feel d man love u much..dont waste time o..accept him o....because I promis u will love him very soon...because women are wired dat way....but it's opposite 4 men....just let him promise u to always love dats ok 4 u.

Ray360:

Bro, Do you know that passion-seasoned love is actually the rationale behind some people sticking with a partner despite the partner's many shortcomings? When you love someone passionately, infinitesimal wrongs and even mammoth wrongs are played down and overlooked. Not because the person is too fragile to walk away, but because there is a deeper part of that person that is rooted in the other party. the passion you described that fades in month is mere infatuation. when it comes to true and refined love, The passion burns like an inferno which cannot be tamed easily.

I totally agree wt u, if dias true passion in ur r/shp, it survives d test of time.

pinkpebbles:
If you do not love a man enough to marry him, can you go ahead and marry him hoping you would love him later or u shud call it quits?

Sure you can but on one condition...He must sincerely want you and be truly in love with you.

Women are naturally wired to fall deeply in love with a man who truly cherishes them even when the lady never loved him initially.

The movie Beauty and the beast is not just a fiction but very practicable in real life scenario.

In fact one of the most rampant reasons for divorce is because ladies tend to marry men who they love so much but does not love them or pretends to love them.Ironically many ladies could tell if a man really cherishes them but they tend to overlook it because of the rush of unreasoning desire they have for the dude and later regrets it.

A prince charming who treats you like poo will look uglier than a beast to you in no time while that short fat ugly pot bellied guy will be so adorable to you latter when he continuously treats you like a queen.

Its up to you to make your decision.

It is hard to find true love.

I know what d op is talking about cos v been dere' when u not physically attracted to a man
That seems to v all d qualities u desire .Its a v difficult situation cos u not sure to come by Dat type of man if u lose him. It goes down to two things one if u are d type Dat believe so much in "love "its good that u quit to avoid cheating on him, a man u love will always appear v cute to you even if hes ugly to d world, love can not b forced, its either dere or not but if u can overlook ds attribute by considering his other good qualities. U can give it a trial.but jremember nothing certain in life, u can easily grow outa love wt who u once loved n its possible u fall in love wt him eventually

Honestly you must search your Soul because love is one thing but true honesty to yourself is what matters. If you don't love him now what guarantees you would love him eventually.

Sometimes you might be lucky because people change after all is said and done so you might have the advantage Loving slowly and lightly at first so you notice some negative traits you know will never keep a household and you can leave just as you came.

Love grows but if it isn't there to begin with I doubt if it will be there in the end

catlova2:


When every other thing is available except enough money to make the love really quantifiable. just saying

lol. It shouldn't be all about money na.

Youngpo413:
if he has a fat bank account, that's what naija ladies are interested in.

Nah I disagree with that notion.

VickyRotex:


lol. It shouldn't be all about money na.

Yea, for a woman it is most of the time. U know nah

LuveU2:
I can manage him if he is cute

is dat ur only criteria 4 marrying someone

catlova2:


Yea, for a woman it is most of the time. U know nah

lol. I see. Different strokes then.

VickyRotex:


lol. I see. Different strokes then.

Hain, are u forming a different specie now ni

pinkpebbles:
If you do not love a man enough to marry him, can you go ahead and marry him hoping you would love him later or u shud call it quits?

You don't hav to call it quit yet,jus give it a time nd let d love germinate in ur heart.nd mind u let d ur mind be stable.

Thank u. I am takin ur advice

Toks2008:


Sure you can but on one condition...He must sincerely want you and be truly in love with you.

Women are naturally wired to fall deeply in love with a man who truly cherishes them even when the lady never loved him initially.

The movie Beauty and the beast is not just a fiction but very practicable in real life scenario.

In fact one of the most rampant reasons for divorce is because ladies tend to marry men who they love so much but does not love them or pretends to love them.Ironically many ladies could tell if a man really cherishes them but they tend to overlook it because of the rush of unreasoning desire they have for the dude and later regrets it.

A prince charming who treats you like poo will look uglier than a beast to you in no time while that short fat ugly pot bellied guy will be so adorable to you latter when he continuously treats you like a queen.

Its up to you to make your decision.

catlova2:


Hain, are u forming a different specie now ni

Yes ke I'm Unique ni!

Smellymouth:
I think love is overrated .  If I share the same faith with her, she is homely, a great mother ,we love many of the same things, share the same views about the direction of our future, have the same goals, etc. 
A great woman makes a great partner. I dont know how many times I have seen men put up with CRAP simply because, "I love her." "What do you love about him?"  "I dont know, I just love him."  Love is not needed for marriage.  But respect is.  Also I recommend men marry women on their intellectual and motherly level.

This holds water

Love does not exist . That passion or emotional feeling u are calling love fades away with time. Most divorcee or marriage in crises u are seeing today had experienced this fake passion or feeling u call love before getting married. But they later became worst enemies to each other. Listen! Two partners need compatibility, understanding, respect, submissiveness, loyalty, patience, tolerance, companionship, and vision with each other before getting married.

byvan03:
No, I will not marry him and hope to love him later. I have to be drunk in love to promise for better for worse. If it doesn't feel right, don't do it. Get married to the one you really want to be with.

The one you want to be with will surely have someone else on his mind... And the cycle continues.

pinkpebbles:
If you do not love a man enough to marry him, can you go ahead and marry him hoping you would love him later or u shud call it quits?

Love is truly overated.
Do you respect him enough to submit to his authority as your husband?Will he be up to his responsibilities as a man? Are you going in the same direction?....i mean is he your ideal man?
When it comes to love, trust me you are safer if he loves you more, naturally yours will grow. Question is Does he love and respect you?

pinkpebbles:
Thank u. I am takin ur advice

I am humbled.

Nevertheless,please understand that there is no perfect choice of spouse but its all about tolerating the bad sides and celebrating his good sides.

Wish you all the best sis and have a great day.

pinkpebbles:
If you do not love a man enough to marry him, can you go ahead and marry him hoping you would love him later or u shud call it quits?

hoping is a strong word which can go both ways! If for instance a lady marries a man hoping to love him and it goes south she will end up enduring her marriage instead of enjoying it. With all the ups and downs of marriage love is what makes it enjoyable so if it can't be sorted now,no Need to follow through IN the Name of Hope!

VickyRotex:



PS: Just be sure it's love and not infatuation. At times it's not love that makes one quiver when you think about a person, it's Infatuation/Lust.

That your last paragraph says it all. And the problem with infatuation is that it can last for years under certain conditions, but once the fuel is gone, their eyes will clear. At that point you'll hear things like "How on earth did I marry a bitch like this?". Of course you know the next thing "DIVORCE!". That's why celebrities divorce like it's a religious ritual. Listen to their music and you'll hear that line that tells you the root of their relationship problem: LUST/INFATUATION.
Please if your eyes have not cleared yet, DO NOT MARRY THAT GUY YET! You're still like Alice in the wonderland. That burning thing is PASSION, not LOVE. Passion is an attribute of both Love and Infatuation. Please don't make the mistake so many musicians and actors across the world are making.

I REST MY CASE!
THANK YOU!

ikp120:



That your last paragraph says it all. And the problem with infatuation is that it can last for years under certain conditions, but once the fuel is gone, their eyes will clear. At that point you'll hear things like "How on earth did I marry a bitch like this?". Of course you know the next thing "DIVORCE!". That's why celebrities divorce like it's a religious ritual. Listen to their music and you'll hear that line that tells you the root of their relationship problem: LUST/INFATUATION.
Please if your eyes have not cleared yet, DO NOT MARRY THAT GUY YET! You're still like Alice in the wonderland. That burning thing is PASSION, not LOVE. Passion is an attribute of both Love and Infatuation. Please don't make the mistake so many musicians and actors across the world are making.

I REST MY CASE!
THANK YOU!

God bless you so much for this. You've said it all!