StarBukola:
If a guy cannot take me for who I am, I tell him to go mess himself... Op say that to ur self often , pikin no b disease

can we talk on whatzapp?

Mimzyy:


Vexing for u o . That your post on front page was too harsh. You want her to go n hurt herself abi .

I'm fine. How's every?

No na, I think people misunderstand the message.

What I simply wanted to say is that she should be ready to expand her requirements as most young single guys would rather go for girls without kids than someone with. BTW some guys even narrowed theirs to girls with virginity intact.

That's not to say it's impossible to meet her spec though

teebillz:


Chiomababy22, this guy asked a very important question. Answer him.

i was only 18 then. After giving birth he said if wasn't ready for marriage, and since you can't force a man to marry i had to go back to my mum.

maasoap:

If I'm still single, I could put up with one that has female child but not one with a male child. There is tendency for male child to grow up in your house with love and still becomes a rebel under your roof just because you're not his biological father. He could become violent but females rarely become violent even if they turn rebel.

Different strokes. There's no love can't overcome

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

1st of all, accept urself, be proud of ur child and urself, Wetin don happen don happen.

Once u start flaunting ur child and urself as a single mum, trust me, men will come into ur life and will want to stay, because they know it all b4 venturing into the relationships.


It is always a problem when I try to hide it in the beginning and then come out later.


B4 u go into any relationship, make sure all those secrets that can't be hidden for long are known by ur partner, with that it will enable him know what he is going into.


Best of luck as u find ur rib.


Giving birth outside wedlock is not associated with leprosy, it is a blessing in disguise , but that is only when we know how to handle our lives, make decisions and stand by them

N1one:

Lmao! Bros na joke o. You can have her

Good boy

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

A woman with a child na second hand be dt nw

I had to drop one nt long ago BC @ her 30 I was shocked when she told me dt D 11yrs old girl with her mum is her child painful but dt was d end.

Anyway u can still see a widower, divorcee, single father or 55 plus bachelor if u r gainfully employed.

Bigsteveg:


Am not that type

Alright,no vex o

Enlarge your scope of relationships to European men and within two months you will be happily married to the man of your dreams and my sister in her fifties who is a single mother to five grown children was swept off her feet by a European man four years her junior and a divorced father of a daughter!!!!!! Please don't hesitate to try dating online with European and always tell them the truth and they will appreciate you more, All the best in your search for a life partner



You are dating wrong people.U need 2 open up to a range of people even those u think are not ur spec.I bet all these men you are dating are within your age grade and not ready 2 settle down.There are a lot of single dads out there and divorced men too, give everyone a chance and stop being choosy.All these babymamas out there didn't impregnant themselves,the babydaddies are responsible for that.[/quote]

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

Yours will come.. Most men believe a child complicates things in a relationship... Meaning they don't come first... Because men are like kids they never want to share that position hence u see men having issues with their kids when mothers give more attn to their kids than they do their husbands.... But the truth is your child comes first... And u shouldn't have to get any man... They can either take u both as a packaged deal or not take u at all... My advice talk about ur child from the very beginning so they know u have one before they even start making advances ... That one person who will take you for you will stay

chigoizie7:



1st of all, accept urself, be proud of ur child and urself, Wetin don happen don happen.

Once u start flaunting ur child and urself as a single mum, trust me, men will come into ur life and will want to stay, because they know it all b4 venturing into the relationships.


It is always a problem when I try to hide it in the beginning and then come out later.


B4 u go into any relationship, make sure all those secrets that can't be hidden for long are known by ur partner, with that it will enable him know what he is going into.


Best of luck as u find ur rib.


Giving birth outside wedlock is not associated with leprosy, it is a blessing in disguise , but that is only when we know how to handle our lives, make decisions and stand by them

U started well but ended by talking rubbish. . How exactly is having a bastard child out of wedlock a blessing in disguise? Pls stop consoling the O.p for her fuu*ck ups... she fuucked up so she must bear d consequences. Qed

Jimi23:

"Some ladies" is she part of those ladies?

help me ask am .

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

I took time to look ur dp if u are really the one affected then they are not good for u if they are they will stay how I wish I HV some one like u

NOETHNICITY:
Be realistic when advising somebdy,pls.
Her choices are vastly limited now, hence, most pple quiting the relationship.

It's only golddiggers that came and quit and it's better they did. True love covers all things - that's why they say love is blind. True love is an unconditional love from the heart. These guys that came and quit never had that for her. It's that simple.

Cc: tonyebarcanista
chiomababy22

8 pages of comments from hypocrites yet no one with balls to just propose to the OP. Nansense.

TonyeBarcanista:
I know but subjecting him to ridicule is off it

my guy i just de gbadun you, you just de up and down of the thread no worry i de your back no shaking

chiomababy22:
i was only 18 then. After giving birth he said if wasn't ready for marriage, and since you can't force a man to marry i had to go back to my mum.

It is well with you IJN.

My dear, never deny ur baby in all problems ur passing 2ru. Because ur baby is all u av, any man that will love u, he will loves u wit all u av. Like me now i av a lover that has a daughter an i like the daughter morethan the way i love her...God bless us all!

donestk:
8 pages of comments from hypocrites yet no one with balls to just propose to the OP. Nansense.

why you no propose to her abi you no be guy ? lmao

motherfucker:
Keep telling whoever wish to hear. NEVER deny your child.

One of our childhood friend, my elder brother's age mate, came to Benin and dated a lot of girls. He never settled down with anyone.

But as God would have it, he married a single mother who child was already above 10 year old. It was struggle for them and before long, he got a job with a construction company.

After about 2-3 years he resigned and started his own kabukabu business because he was tired of the construction job. He did that for another 2 years and last year, an opportunity came that took the entire family, excluding him to US. As I type this now, all his children( 3 of them), the step daughter and the wife are in US. He sold all his property to raise money for the journey.

I personally don't see anything wrong in marrying a single mother as long as she a good woman and yes, my bros wife is a good woman. I missed her delicious meals like crazy lol.

I have come to realise that Nigerians are the biggest hypocrites on earth. The scream racism and discrimination on other's head but in their own land, there are different kind of discrimination and stigmatisation going on.

OP, non of those guys truly love you. Is your child not a human being like them?

I know a lady who never had a lasting marriage because they found out her mum died from Cancer and she had a child in her first marriage but I thank God today she has found a man who really love her. I also pray that this one last long and from all indications, it wil LAST!

Keep your faith ALIVE!!!!

GBAM! Truly she has not found her missing rib. My sister had 2kids when she was in secondary school.It was our mum that took care of these children and as FAITH would have it she got married to a young first timer man. she bore him 3 kids. The five children live with him and i must confess they have really made it together. Madam,pls keep your hope alive, your time is on the way.

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

simple point I will like to add on this issue is this, much as I don't know Ur circumstance and age importantly, but wish ever way my dear, Ur case is not hopeless. But I must keep u on notice that young men are not the type to deal sensible in all forms of social level of issues, which goes to say that most men who can best relate with Ur particular case are in there matured age and whose principle permits they to think out of traditional way of thought. Trust God for your expectations, keep cheerful and know that your happiness don't depend on someone else... If u wish u can whatsapp me... 08065573612. Mail, rexeolo5@hotmail.com

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

A friend of mine will be getting married this April, to his girl who's also a single mum. Before she even accepted his advances, the first thing she told him was, I have a son, can you handle such a situation? He agreed and its going to eventually lead to marriage. Any man who rejects you because of your child is not serious and probably wants to have a taste of you.

Its mainly women I know they've got serious issues with children not theirs (they never say it at first but then maltreat the child once they are in their husband's house) but men can deal with children not theirs quite easily. So if a man uses your child as excuse to break up with you, then all he ever wanted from you was just the sex.

samuelson06:
Don't hide the fact but be proud of your child. Make sure you take good care of the child. Any man that comes to you that does not love the child does not love the mother. Your choice of a man is not limited either. Work hard to be great and don't settle for any half-baked man because of your situation. The most important thing for you now is working on yourself to be a real woman and a wife material.

This is the most useless and wicked comment on this post. Don't settle for a half baked man... your choice of man is not limited... any man that does not love the child... bla bla bla. Now tell yourself the truth, can you settle for a baby mama after seeing numerous single girls and knowing fully well that the challenges that comes with such situations especially when the child grows are enormous. Most guys avoids such situation not because they don't love the child and mother but because of future occurences and don't forget that we're africans and in africa where marriages are respected and expected by and of the both families to make inputs.

That is a shalow reasoning of us Africans, why can't she find love again, just because she had a daughter then.

WORLDPEACE:


Humans are liars. This is true with both sexes. We are like icebergs that you see in the ocean; What is under the water is more than the part you see floating. Women may say that they want a guy who is God fearing, polite and all that but the single most important factor is what the man owns materially. This is often not what the most decent girls project but it is the single most important factor. This is not the visible to all at first glance but a man neglects it at his own peril.

Now you must sell yourself like a man would. Go out there and get money if you don't already have. Be successful and you will become attractive to men, both rich and broke guys. Then you will have to take your pick from these men. Don't hate the roles reversal, just accept it for what it is. People care about what other people will say than about their own personal happiness. FRIENDS AND RELATIVES WOULD FIND IT MORE RATIONAL THAT THEIR LOVED ONE IS MARRYING A SUCCESSFUL MOTHER OF ONE THAN A KIND HEARTED MOTHER OF ONE. They will give other surface explanations to people for why they like you but the larger part of the iceberg under water says something else. You will do yourself great good by accepting this reality.

Of course you may be fortunate and find that great dream man that is not drawn by this but it's better to ready yourself for it. You are more likely also to be married to a single parent like yourself so look for ways to meet such ones. I am not trying to paint a picture of doom and gloom, I am just showing the fastest route to your goal.
Lastly, I want to say that it is not a bad thing for a man to get married to a woman because of her money among other things. It is only bad if that is the only reason. In other words it is only bad when a bad man marries a woman for her money.
I wish you success soon.

good advice

but I had to laugh bro
attract both rich and broke guys
haha

bizie:



How's that even your concern. Just cos she asked for advise, now you r feeling like a father. Grow sense joor

we all must have a divergent view on issues and I'm entitled to my opinion, we all cannot be (O yes) members


we need to disagree in order to agree and no need to attack who disagrees with you


we all read it here the rising spate of baby mama's for share greediness and to be associated with celebrities


such ladies will eventually found themselves in this situation when the father of her child finally settles down with a fresher babe


it will be myopic for you think we all must not see things in different angles
.

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

Don't hide the truth babe is better to tell true and die, everybody have his or her pass. Yoruba usually say that Omo kise arun if you don't mind I have children too and single dad

chiomababy22:
i was only 18 then. After giving birth he said if wasn't ready for marriage, and since you can't force a man to marry i had to go back to my mum.

...........you did the right thing Chioma.....btw, Sorry for making you so popular today, being the first person to comment on your post, your profile pix with just 10 likes since january is now almost 60 likes in 2hours o! Mr Right on the way sis!! Just be careful to select now!! All the very best once more!!

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

I believe true love bears all things if these guys that have come your way were truely in love with you as you claimed they were and Godsent I strongly believe they wouldn't have left one after the other the way they did.Having lovechild doesn't make you an outcast or a social misfit.I strongly warn you not to ever deny that child because of your desperation for marriage or re-marriage always be your true self.I don't know how old you're now but I want you to know there are many women out there who are older than you without marriage or even married for years without child, I'm not talking disparagingly of them but just for the sake of citing an instance.So be yourself and don't engage in self-pity or lose your self-esteem on account of desperation for marriage or re-marriage as the case may be.Your own man will come just exercise some patience.In case you feel we should talk some more here is my phone no :08054128730.Cheers!

NgoziOkoli:


My friend! Shut up and face front!

Who be your mate here! I do the talk y'all do the listening! What does kid like you know?

you too shut up.who are u?who is this monkey.her choices are hard simple.tell her the truth

now get out of here.old stewpid woman

egbabiekperemo1:



U started well but ended by talking rubbish. . How exactly is having a bastard child out of wedlock a blessing in disguise? Pls stop consoling the O.p for her fuu*ck ups... she fuucked up so she must bear d consequences. Qed

All man to his or her own opinions.


She made a mistake , a costly mistake @ that. And for that, we must stone her?

Every encounter in life is either a lesson or a blessing, whichever it is, it is not a waste.

She already made the mistake , all we need to do is encourage her to move with her life.

I choose nice words and consolations because some people can't handle some issues, I try to encourage her to see it as a blessing so that she don't take her anger on the innocent child.

And next time, if u can't make ur points in a civilized manner, avoid my mentions

chiomababy22:
I had a child 8 years ago. Ever since then, having a long lasting relationship is a big problem because they leave me with the excuse of my child been an issue. My last relationship has left me shattered and the last thing i want to do is deny my baby. Am confused pls friends what do you advise i do? Am not getting any younger. Thanks as i await you comments.

Dont ever deny your child....I have dated a lady for close to two years who had a child whom i loved and always cared for...the mother always messes up but i always stick around because the girl is alwas adorable until some time when i couldnt keep up to the mother's excesses ...