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Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by basic23111: 7:01am On Dec 02, 2017
my wife knows my salary but don't know when I get paid, she still believe I'm expecting my October salary

1 Like

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by OShepherd: 7:04am On Dec 02, 2017
verygudbadguy:
Different strokes for different folks. I don't hide mine from my wife because it saves a lot. As a matter of fact, na she be d finance minister.

I may not disclose other earnings aside salary accurately sha but I let her have an idea. You no say women too dey kaku. Before she go dey calculate money for bottles and nkwobi/catfish for me.

All in all, it is good to be transparent with your spouse. It breeds peace and progress in the family.
Correct man! Same spirit we got bro & she will b ur bestie through rough & tough afterall she's in charge

2 Likes

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Reference(m): 7:22am On Dec 02, 2017
It is the right thing to do because it fits into the financial structure of a strong, stable family. It can however be be tricky where earnings are not fixed and scheduled like a salary. Multiple jobs, business and investment income maybe too dynamic or unpredictable to report accurately constantly and this can lead to misconception or misunderstanding. For this reason instead of earnings reporting couples may just operate a demand or budget based system where responsibilities are shared proportionally with shortfalls (deficits) or surpluses only discussed at specific time periods.

Couples may also operate a joint account with specific contributory targets which may form the basis of 'family earnings'. In this case they continue to operate independent finances which in some cases may prove healthy for the development of the relationship. Some individuals actually perform better when gi en the liberty to keep finances personally personal.

All these matters are best discussed and sorted out in courtship so that agreements and arrangements can be made prior to practice in marraige..

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Etranshub(m): 7:29am On Dec 02, 2017
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked


A wife must never know what her husband earns or his source of income.
It is none of her business, her job is just to enjoy the wealth and make babies for the man, that's why they are called 'oriaku'.

But a woman's income must be known,
It's source well defined;
Before you unknowingly start eating food cooked from money gotten through prostitution.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by bedspread: 7:38am On Dec 02, 2017
VERY WRONG......

HOW DO U HIDE ORDINARY PAPER PR DIGITS FROM A MAN OR WOMAN WHO SEES YOUR unclothedness DAY AND NIGHT...

EATS YOUR FOOD DAY AND NIGHT...

THAT IS FOOLISHNESS IN HIGH PLACES

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by bedspread: 7:40am On Dec 02, 2017
basic23111:
my wife knows my salary but don't know when I get paid, she still believe I'm expecting my October salary
And u Think u are Sharp...... U are Moulding a Bomb dt will Scatter Blow Bomb u Some day sir
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Atunma(f): 7:44am On Dec 02, 2017
I know what my husband earns as he knows mine and we care less. What matters is ur contribution to the family project which is mandatory for the man and makes the woman a helpmeet. Shikena!
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by verygudbadguy(m): 7:49am On Dec 02, 2017
OShepherd:
Correct man! Same spirit we got bro & she will b ur bestie through rough & tough afterall she's in charge
Na so bro.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by bedspread: 7:50am On Dec 02, 2017
JoeyBlack:
I would NOT tell my wife how much I earn.... and I don't care to know how much she earns.... I am not yet married by the way.
U BETTER BE DT WAY, join d Priest Hood, cos if u hook a woman with this mind, it's a Fisater waiting to Happen
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by tunjilana: 7:50am On Dec 02, 2017
Atunma:
I know what my husband earns as he knows mine and we care less. What matters is ur contribution to the family project which is mandatory for the man and makes the woman a helpmeet. Shikena!
Nice but just to clarify. Are contributions to the family project mandatory for a earning wife as well ? or she just does as the spirit leads smiley and when the spirit doesn't care she does nothing and leaves the man to carry all the kaya even when it is killing him wink

1 Like

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Reference(m): 7:50am On Dec 02, 2017
basic23111:
my wife knows my salary but don't know when I get paid, she still believe I'm expecting my October salary

You should know that income is a snapshot sum of the total worth of a man. That is the summation of all the education, information and inspiration the individual has been able to garner and deploy to create the forces of skill, risk and/or effort for which he is compensated. So declaring your income is more or less writing your autobiography because you cannot seperate a man's life from his income. This information in the hands of a good partner may actually help to vett your life to make it more efficient. In the hands of a poor partner it may generate or further inordinate passions and sentiments.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Nobody: 7:51am On Dec 02, 2017
If both agreed to work and both are working, they can disclose. If they both agreed to work and one does not want to work, no need to disclose. If they both decided only one should work, it's important to disclose.

1 Like

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by dingbang(m): 8:16am On Dec 02, 2017
sinaj:
Financial problem?


Will have to help him so I dnt get embarrassed too.
chai.. So we have kind girls out there... Nice one

1 Like

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by jesufifunmi: 8:20am On Dec 02, 2017
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked


A wife must never know what her husband earns or his source of income.
It is none of her business, her job is just to enjoy the wealth and make babies for the man, that's why they are called 'oriaku'.

But a woman's income must be known,
It's source well defined;
Before you unknowingly start eating food cooked from money gotten through prostitution.
I can't believe 68 ignorant and selfish people liked this post.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by perpeling22(f): 8:22am On Dec 02, 2017
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked


A wife must never know what her husband earns or his source of income.
It is none of her business, her job is just to enjoy the wealth and make babies for the man, that's why they are called 'oriaku'.

But a woman's income must be known,
It's source well defined;
Before you unknowingly start eating food cooked from money gotten through prostitution.
Hennn! Nawa for u NwaAmaikpe. A times I wonder how you reason. She cannot cook for you with money from prostitution. Right! But she can cook with money from blood money, kidnapping, fraudster. l hear you.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by poseidon12: 8:38am On Dec 02, 2017
tunjilana:
The response from this topic is what makes you understand that a lot of marriages especially in Nigeria are of convenience. Observing smiley

Exactly. What we practice in Nigeria is union of convenience. It's not really marriage. The typical Nigerian man is going in because he wants to have legitimate children. The typical woman is in because she wants to get financial security. That's all.
If none of these targets are met within the first or second year, a typical Nigerian marriage heads for the rocks. It's all fake.

2 Likes

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by DukeNija(m): 8:46am On Dec 02, 2017
Amarabae:
The question is for those whose partners are civil servants.
How can you know the monthly earning of a business man/woman?
But generally its not a big deal knowing, my hubby don't know how much I'm paid as salary because such information is not relevant to him.
A man should be focused on each of their own earnings and financial empire and not be concerned about what each other earns monthly .

So he has never asked how much you earn? Is it also vice versa?
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by poseidon12: 8:59am On Dec 02, 2017
Atunma:
I know what my husband earns as he knows mine and we care less. What matters is ur contribution to the family project which is mandatory for the man and makes the woman a helpmeet. Shikena!

Our women and this so called help mate mindset. We make it look as if the woman is just a visitor in the home.
I believe that contribution to the family project is mandatory for both the man and the woman; not just the man.
There is too much financial responsibility dumped on a typical Nigerian man's head by our culture. That is probably why a typical Nigerian man is most likely to engage in a corrupt act to enrich himself.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by emmanuel1990(m): 9:01am On Dec 02, 2017
NLbully:
This came to my amusement when I asked someone if he knows how much his partner is earning and to my surprise he said they don't disclose it to each other ( Can't really understand what led to the conversation )

How do you see this, do you think it is right for your partner not to know how much you earn as salary ??

it's nt right, bt some partners are helping matters, i have a friend who is an electrician, when ever he give someone money including his own family, his wife will nt talk to him for days..

so what he normally does is the remove the money that he is going to spend first, then go home with the remaining one as his income..

1 Like

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by geosegun(m): 9:02am On Dec 02, 2017
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked


A wife must never know what her husband earns or his source of income.
It is none of her business, her job is just to enjoy the wealth and make babies for the man, that's why they are called 'oriaku'.

But a woman's income must be known,
It's source well defined;
Before you unknowingly start eating food cooked from money gotten through prostitution.

TOTALLY WRONG

Most of the comments I read above, shows some intrinsic negative attributes such as greed, ignorance and selfish tendencies of either the husband or the wife.

Husband and wife should know each other's earnings and contributes to the family expenses at least on the ratio 70:30 and if the wife earns more may be 60:40. The husband is expected to contribute more as he is the head of the family. This shows how responsible and committed the couple could be.

Some men lack wisdom. If anything happen to the marriage and divorce sets in, the court of competent jurisdiction will divid the family asset into two...irrespective of whether the man solely built the assets or not. While the wife will be spending her own money to take care of her mum, father and siblings...etc

Also, some women are not wise in the sense that, a typical African mentality husband would always want to brag about family properties and achievements alone and that's why they love to put themselves in position of advantages. They can say I built this with my money, therefore leave my house this minutes and blablabla...you know why they get away with that? Cos the wife never bothered to care to know how much he earns and what she can contributes to have a home. If she contributed, I bet you the story will be different.

I share this with you guys so you would not make the mistakes some of our parents made.

I'm happy to share my experience with would be couple on how to live a happy and successful marital life.

Feel free to ask any question.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Lalas247(f): 9:13am On Dec 02, 2017
businessempire:
is Lalasticlala ur boyfriend?
It’s a possibility
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by tunde82seidat(f): 9:15am On Dec 02, 2017
ademide0710:
Every marriage should be built on trust,very important. I know how much my husband earns, when he got a new job he shows me his employment letter. I have my business too. I'm not interested in his money. The trust we have for each other has helped our family so far. He does his responsibility as a husband and father. Whenever his finance down, he finds it so difficult to approach me for money but I always beg him to collect from me,after so much persuasion he stills return when his financial buoyant . When we go for shopping, I make payment at times but his not always comfortable with it. He believes his the head of the family but to me we are to help and support each other. I bless the day, I met that man.

That's the kinda of man God should bless me with o(Amin)n I will of course fufil my own part of the obligations
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by free2ryhme: 9:42am On Dec 02, 2017
ladyF:
False/No declaration of assets and liabilities is very wrong.
grin

Tell the whole world you will declare your accounts to your husband
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Ibenny(f): 9:50am On Dec 02, 2017
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked


A wife must never know what her husband earns or his source of income.
It is none of her business, her job is just to enjoy the wealth and make babies for the man, that's why they are called 'oriaku'.

But a woman's income must be known,
It's source well defined;
Before you unknowingly start eating food cooked from money gotten through prostitution.

In as much as I want to ignore this, I can't.

Your last statement is just off it, so the woman too won't unknowingly spend money given to her by her husband gotten through Cocaine deals, stealing, kidnappings or even organs sales?
Let's not be bias in certain situation.

My dear, most times couples should question their partners income, depending on the partners.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Tizbid(m): 10:16am On Dec 02, 2017
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked


A wife must never know what her husband earns or his source of income.
It is none of her business, her job is just to enjoy the wealth and make babies for the man, that's why they are called 'oriaku'.

But a woman's income must be known,
It's source well defined;
Before you unknowingly start eating food cooked from money gotten through prostitution.

I really don't know which is funnier...the stench of double standard engraved in your comment or the 100+ persons that endorsed it via likes and shares.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by erebi4195(m): 10:55am On Dec 02, 2017
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked


A wife must never know what her husband earns or his source of income.
It is none of her business, her job is just to enjoy the wealth and make babies for the man, that's why they are called 'oriaku'.

But a woman's income must be known,
It's source well defined;
Before you unknowingly start eating food cooked from money gotten through prostitution.
she try na if you see money for cooking. lol grin
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Reference(m): 11:14am On Dec 02, 2017
poseidon12:


Our women and this so called help mate mindset. We make it look as if the woman is just a visitor in the home.
I believe that contribution to the family project is mandatory for both the man and the woman; not just the man.
There is too much financial responsibility dumped on a typical Nigerian man's head by our culture. That is probably why a typical Nigerian man is most likely to engage in a corrupt act to enrich himself.

Indeed. Helpmeet also means helping him not to become corrupt by dissipating financial pressure as and when due. For instance the man maybe inspired on a life project or a vision beyond his immediate capacity. It is up to the woman to stabilize the home while the man makes the sacrifices to actualise the goal. They then share the reward and glory. There goes the saying, that 'behind every successful man is a woman'.

If there is such synergy then the question of financial disclose just becomes mundane.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by shinarlaura(f): 12:23pm On Dec 02, 2017
Myde4naija:
you sound too serious for my liking.

Wonders grin

grin grin grin grin grin grin Am i still serious?
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Evacroft: 12:27pm On Dec 02, 2017
NwaAmaikpe:
shocked


A wife must never know what her husband earns or his source of income.
It is none of her business, her job is just to enjoy the wealth and make babies for the man, that's why they are called 'oriaku'.

But a woman's income must be known,
It's source well defined;
Before you unknowingly start eating food cooked from money gotten through prostitution.

U have weird thoughts, i bet this stems from ur roots
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by FRANKOSKI(m): 12:30pm On Dec 02, 2017
SOME WILL USE IT TO DEMAND EXCESS FROM YOU SO IT DEPENDS ON THE KIND OF PERSON.
Re: Couples Hiding Their Earnings From Each Other, Right Or Wrong? by Evacroft: 12:34pm On Dec 02, 2017
This are part of the things that makes a marriage last longer,it is called "Trust".
If a man or a woman cant be open about their finances how else will they work together hand in hand.

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