zedman1:
Yea, its unjustifiable and I still regret that action till date, that I gave her the impression I could beat her up some time is bad enough. At least I should have left with a clean slate but I've also learnt not to make hasty conclussions about issues bordering on this one cos I once was guilty ...... You see? Just like I said, sometimes it's the good guys that are guilty of this crime, that's sad. See as your gentle bobo come fire you slap in the end. Hehe.

AntiBrutus:


Well said. Sometimes you're truthful .
So many of us, if not all of us are guilty of one form of abuse or the other. Some men get their own for body, what of always refusing to eat wifey food...when he knows it hurts her psychologically.

That's why I said, your spouse must disrespect you. when it defies all means of reconciliation, then they can go their separate ways.

It will take a lot for me to hit someone though...

donstan18:
The major problem is that partners of these days no longer pay attention, learn and observe the necessary things they are suppose to observe from their partner while courting and dating.

They date with misplaced priorities, they don't put to test to dictate some possible unforeseen trauma.

donstan18?

Toks2008:


Ore e ju. So what is your point?

bobkezel:
This statement "no man should raise his hands on a woman" is highly overrated and hypocritical. Ladies now depend on that to misbehave.
Your dad beat you several times did you die?
You fought with your brothers and they beat u up, did you remember to die?
A random guy beat you up, was "die" in your dictionary?
Now just one slap from your husband cos of ur misbehavior, you remembered there are 1000 ways to die.
Taaa, go and sit down. Na ogbanje de worry you.

sisisioge:




Open hand slap that feels like a train passing ones cheeks nko? Whew! That one comes with several megawatts of lights! I once took that from a very gentle bobo I had been dating for several years. It was shocking to both of us but marked the beginning of our end. Violence is violence... Don't just hit her!

Toks2008:


What about sounding?...the type our mum use to give us in the late 70s and early 80s Lol!

DMerciful:
Everybody is saying no man should beat a woman under any circumstance. So who are those beating their women? Hypocrisy as always

samir101ng:


Chop Knuckle jare. No man turns into Mike Tyson overnight. The symptoms must have been there. But of course, our new crop of nigerian women have different priorities. A good example is the daily stories of yahoo boys and their victims making the news daily. Shebi, you want Ferari and Dubai trips !!! Be prepared to pay for it with your soul. Whoopi Goldberg made a good argument for men retaliating when being physically abused by their women. If a women hits you, hit her back. Shebi, feminists are saying men and women are equal. So, why should men be boxed into a corner and made to accept both verbal and physical abuse and not retaliate because it's a woman doing it. Just imagine the hypocrisy. No one advocates that men should be beating their wives but what is good for the goose is also good for the gander. Do me I do you. Shebi, we are "equal" partners in the marriage. Love, respect and honour me and I will do the same. But physically and verbally assault me and I will dish it out to you also. I won't start a fight but I will definitely finish one. Nobody should condone abuse of any kind to any member of the sexes. Both women and men should be held responsible for their attitudes and manners in a relationship.

zedman1:
Let me tell you a long story. Sometimes you never know how these things happen until it happens to you. I could swear on papa's grave that I'd never raise my hand on a woman but unfortunately I once did! I would'nt put the blame on alchohol cos I was fully conscious of my action, I had downed just a bottle. We had known each other when we were still very young. It was one hell of a relationship that I made several attempts to leave but I could'nt, she would'nt let me- yes, I was so soft hearted that I forgave her for every crap she did whenever she came back. She was like a demond sent to torment me to death, extremely beautiful she was, very very pretty,not just in my eyes. Maybe that was what blinded me. At that moment it happened, even as I raised my hand in an attempt to give her a very dirty slap, I realized when my open palm was mid-way to her face that I had messed up big time so I tried to hold back and ended up pushing her face a little. We were both shocked! I apologized IMMIDIATELY and left the scene. That night, knowing what I had done, the intent alone was killing me, so in my misery I sent her a text that we could no longer be together, but instead she came back two days later begging again! After some thoughts I forgave her but
the next three weeks after that event was like hell, it was like she turned up her evil volume to the max. Anyway, we broke up when I went to see her but met her absence. She had requested some cash to go to the hospital that she was feeling a bit under the weather but little did I know she needed the money for transport to Lagos to go meet some big guy who claimed he loved her ( I knew about this guy) and wanted to marry her. I called her, she told me the details bluntly and as I ended the call, I never called again, neither did she. To cut the long story short, between them there was an introduction, an engagement but the marriage did not hold. That was about three years ago. Until today as I type she's still trying hard to find a way to get back to me but that fence I built while she was away cannot be pulled down anymore. Do not judge cos you might be in the same situation some day. Im not justifying wife beating but sometimes it might be a mistake that warrants forgiveness, perhaps just once as the OP suggests.Sometimes it's even the 'good guys' that end up being wife beaters. Pray you never fall for a pretty lady with a very bad character( I was told most of them have that), I did'nt pen down the uncountable and unthinkable things she did to me here. And pray you never loose your cool. Thanks.

davillian:

I try as much as I can not to get involve in a fight with a woman but the day I got pushed to the wall I smashed her head on the door until she fainted and after that I ended the relationship.

912:


Interesting story. Now, I'm not saying some ladies are not evil. On the contrary, what I'm saying is that you don't have to turn into a beast and desend so low as to put your hands on a woman. Once you see that a relationship is toxic simply end it. Most guys will see clearly that a lady has a very nasty attitude and instead of ending it they will be trying to change the person. And the problem with trying to change someone is that most often than not you are the one that end up changing.

Just like the story you gave, you clearly saw that she was toxic and unfaithful for a long time but you kept the relationship. My point is do not put yourself in such relationship because you will end up being frustrated and doing something you won't be proud of. Same thing goes for the ladies, once you notice that someone is exhibiting behaviours that are not healthy for you (mentally or physically) just leave before its too late and you turn into a punching bag.

Toks2008:

E wo bi omo se frosh to tun set..LEFULEFU abi ki lo feel?

Adamummya:


what's that bikonu

zedman1:
Hehe, "and I kept it", sounds pretty easy. You're right bro, I've actually changed and I know it, but in cases of depression or suicide, most times we do not know what the victims are/were going through but the general reaction when such mishaps occur is to lebel the victims as being stupid. But then again, my playboy friend is in a relationship with his supposed 'main' girlfriend and he treats her like fowl poo. I look at this girl and in my mind I see how foolish she is for still hanging on to my friend. She has called severally to tell me its over between them, seeking my opinion but always, I contribute nothing. Who does'nt know my friend is a chronic cheat? Yet they both won't let go. She is his main sqeeze after all. See? Now that I'm out I think someone else a fool.They should'nt "keep it". Some of such relationships arent that easy to walk out from. Some persons are fortunate never to have gone through such so it's quite easy giving advice about it. I wish I could tell this girl to leave but I would'nt, never! She's foolish, hehe- see again? Though as guys I've told my friend to let go if he is'nt ready to step up and be a responsible chap for once. Lets hope she does'nt pull a trigger on him some day. Relationships come in different shades and a toxic one is'nt one anyone should wish for anyone.....one love 9one2.

Constantiney:

Smh,
Look at what i wrote again.

Hit her, its your choice.
You have right to hit her of course, you have the right to go to jail too if anything happens to her.

Who knew if it was rhianna who punched Chris Brown at first and he had to "defend" himself by punching back? But guess who's still walking around with the consequence now? Being smart sometimes means you have to swallow your pride and be "foolish" momentarily for the greater good.

Don't mention me again, you are very lucky to get a reply from me, i don't usually reply egoistic cunts.

Toks2008:

It means how old are you?
You are a teenager I guess.

Adamummya:



a teen ? I'm not a teen plss