MariaLavina:
Sigh!

Lol at your conclusions of my thoughts, very ridiculous judgement from shallow understanding. To you, Being independent only relates with finance.Even when I went further to list some reasons why people get married (regular Bleep, attention, love etc) You ignored but focus on what bites you most. Very funny!!

Do people not ponder on random things happening around them? Do I live in a different world? Why do you think I meditating on marriage means that's the boiling agenda on my mind? You people amaze me.
[b]
I stand on my point Mister, the more emotionally, physically, psychologically, sexually and financially independent you become, t[/b]he lesser you see the need for marriage. Argue that and not what I want to get married for!

bukatyne:


The dependency mindset is a parasitic one?

What are you about?

Is a husband not supposed to provide?

Does a husband who depend on his wife for a clean and warm home also have dependency mindset?

bukatyne:


How many men are 'rich'?

How many are married? What is the ratio to women?

I don't think we live in the Nigeria.

And traditionally, the husband is to provide with the wife not working on some cases.

How is the wife in this instance supposed to be 'rich'?

majekdom2:
how possible is the bolded? Not possible. It's only natural to want to love and be loved... except the psychopaths we have around. We need someone at sometime in our lives. How we balance that is what matters most. Saying you can be totally independent is irrational to me.

Famousqueen:

yes, i know, it's whatever rocks my boat and who say i can't have kids if i want to

amethystnnty1:


By your definition a soul is yanked into existence just to be an eternal slave (I agree with you).

A machine programmed to reproduce and bring another soul to a constant life of external struggle.

Don't you think the moral thing to do is to deny our programming and refuse to bring in another soul to this eternal slavery?

I refuse to enlist a non existed soul for an eternal slavery why do I need a woman and have I serve my purpose in life.?

jaxxy:


I agree with u bt sadly sm people use biblical teachings to subdue or rather manipulate their wives to conform to their ignoble wishes. I believe if u don't hv certain traits or behavior u shudnt venture into marriage and i also believe marriage isn't compulsory for everyone. Being single is ok aswell

Famousqueen:

do you think, i just woke up one morning and just make this decision, like you said "humans are the difficult people to deal with" do you know what i went through all because of relationship, do you know that i am gemophobia and philophobia at the same time because of my past and the only thing i want is to forget about relationship and live without commitment.

Uglymugg:
sweet baby, you have not answered my question!!!

Silumi:

I like the way you think to.life is a choice we actually are not programmed beings we have always had a freewill to decide what to do with our lives if that is the moral thing for you to do, then you have made a choice you see befitting for yourself.if we wer automatoms as u claim we wouldn't be having this conversation because you wouldn't even be able to think to have an opinion of your own.and hmm for the idea of eternal slavery..it's not the definition of my own existence so I really can't relate.

amethystnnty1:


Do you know that under the right laboratory condition it can be predicted to almost to a certainty what action the brain will tell you body to do every single time. So if it it's possible to determine the sentence you're about to alter seconds before you do what do we call free will

"There is also agreement in the scientific community that the firing of neurons determines not just some or most but all of our thoughts, hopes, memories, and dreams." --The Atlantic

FREE WILL is nothing but an illusion by our brain from the idea of self.

Silumi:

I have had courses on neuroscience and I must say that your interpretation of these facts may be a bit sqwed.That fact u quoted was borne from "learning and memory consolidation".

For our brains determining what our body does or telling what our body to do is true but its not something the brain was born with its something the brain learns with time "when you think for eg I want to carry a cup your cerebral cortex interprets it and sends information to your cerebellum to coordinate the movement of picking that cup because to information on how to pick that cup was stored by your cerebellum the first time you ever learnt that movement it's all a process called learning and memory consolidation.

The firing of neurons determining our thoughts in that quoted article does not necessary mean it tells us what to say *No* but it could stimulate the path in which our thoughts take
eg underfiring of some neurons could cause a person to think in the depression line and over activity also could cause anxious tots it's just the way the body works everything for a particular action but all this are learned they don't give birth to a person depressed or anxious your first experience of this emotions is what sets the pace for how the brain will behave in those situations.

in essence sir we create ourselves we see we learn the brain stores and produced the memory when needed.our brains are plain sheets everything in it today sir we put it there consciously and unconsciously by our actions. So we are masters of the brain we teach it in essence we program our own selves not solely.not any supreme being.

The fact that you can trigger some neurons to do some things in the adult brain is a pure case of what has been learnt and stored all his life.if this fact is how you present it babies would be born talking and capable of all emotions and not having the burden of having to Learn a language.or the would run out of the womb because they would be a programmed knowledge on how to run in fact they will feed them selves because they would be born with the know how.

Free will is true... of may things that are illusions in this life it is not one of them.if it was truly an illusion we won't have different religions because we would all be born with the knowledge that we are to serve the God that protected us.

Choice in religion today is a sign of free will,Good and bad people is also a sign ,the evil we leave with today all this are choices man has made by his own freewill.

If God was a power freak and took free will from us we would all be Christians we won't even know there is something wrong(you have two hands a person born with one is an abnormality y because two hands is the accepted normal)so serving God would have come natural and at so much ease but it's not so today because we struggle with flesh every day .

If we wer machine sir we won't be having this conversation because there would be no desire of any form to rebel against our maker it won't be part of our programme.You and I have free wills if not we would have been on the same page about God but u have your opinion and I have mine.choice an unaltered form of Free will at its best.

Silumi:

The fact that you can trigger some neurons to do some things in the adult brain is a pure case of what has been learnt and stored all his life.if this fact is how you present it babies would be born talking and capable of all emotions and not having the burden of having to Learn a language.or the would run out of the womb because they would be a programmed knowledge on how to run in fact they will feed them selves because they would be born with the know how.

amethystnnty1:


It is a human condition the inability to fully express the content of our reality (which I believe is subjective) so I take responsibility for writing so little that you weren't able to adequately interprete what I meant. I wish I had something that could transcribe as fast as my thought.




I did not infer that humans were programmed with knowledge that will inform every one of our actions at conception. I used "programming" for lack of a better word. In fact I am of the belief that who we are as an individual is constantly evolving and this depends on a lot of variables most of which are no choice of ours.

"They don't give birth to a person depressed or anxious" you say.

You do know that genes account for about 50% of the predisposition to suicide behaviour. Take as an example, Chinedu a morbidly obese boy by no fault or choice of his own was born into a family with a history of depression (yes, it is hereditary){GENES & DIET}. His parents weren't the worst parent but not a great one either. They provide for their son the basic need but like most Nigerian parent {CULTURE} they couldn't reach their son to know how truly he was feeling inside. As an introvert an extremely shy boy he was always the laughingstocks at school PIGGY he was called, he had no friend and was always being picked on by the school bullies{ENVIRONMENT}. One day he fell asleep while in class and he woke up to the laugh of the class to see that his trouser has been pulled, this was the trigger for him. When he got out of the school that day his mother wasn't there to pick him up because she was held up in traffic for about 30minutes because there was a protest by some university students over a hike in tuition price {ENVIRONMENT}. Chinedu jumped in front of a moving trailer and off himself a few minutes before his mother arrived. He was 17years old.



Simulate this for a double of Chinedu in another universe or even if possible on a computer program. Take into consideration over billions of years everything to the minuscule details from the big bang to the formation of the first cell to the evolution of every species to first man to everything that lead to his father and mother to the billions of sperms his sperm compete with to make it to the egg in his mother to everything that happened while he was in the womb of his mother, everything that determined his genetic makeup and his neural physiology (which is gonna determine his every next thought and intentions).


No one is born as a blank slate (science ; evolutionary biology and evolutionary psychology has shown that), if that were true identical twin raised under the same conditions would by definition be thesame in every way, but the fact is they'll differ in temperament even if they are same sex more so if they are different sexes, they'll differ in intelligence, cognitive ability and capabilities, talents and in a lot of ways (they might be similar in some or most ways too).

Now let's continue with the simulation, expose the clone of Chinedu to everything the original was expose to not changing any external factor to the tiniest fraction of a second.

If such an experiment could be done I believe a billion clone of Chinedu in a billion universe would still jump in front of the trailer at the exact time the original did every single time.

So ma'am that we are having this conversation is because of trillions and trillions of variables that wasn't set in motion by us. We are always gonna end up here having this conversation, every thing that has ever happened brought us here.


***Note that i haven't factor in the CHRISTIAN SOUL which according to the bible we are told is inherently evil.

Silumi:

So chinedu has what we call an endogenous depression which is treatable if he had gotten help earlier it doesn't still stop it from being a misnormal.he was sick and needed help.
It's been actually nice discussing with you.your line of thought is new and different and it made me smile and wonder at most points lol I just can't keep going back and forth on this I may not totally agree with u but I respect your opinion on this issue it's one I believe did not come too easy.do have a nice day

LivingFree:
This confusing! It's like me stuffing my face with cake while telling you it can lead to diabetes

Bitch_ we know, now pass me a slice, I will eat it moderately

Biglittlelois:



Which is

Biglittlelois:
I think the society we are in especially Nigeria affects mind set alot, not every woman wants to GET married, not every woman wants to STAY married, some just wants to taste and leave, people do what society wants so that they wont be tagged different names, personally i'm indifferent about marriage, only advantage is to have a stable and safe fvck mate, have kids legally et al.

Uglymugg:

What criterias do you look out for when choosing a fvck mate? I mean physically characteristics.

Lawlahdey:
Baaaabe.

pocohantas:


I had to read her post again, I think the questionnaire listed some benefits. She replied she doesn't PARTICULARLY advocate for marriage based on the listed things[i.e its benefits transcends the listed]. We need to know what that lady listed for a start.

Looking at it logically, do you think if women [African/NIGERIAN women] were very independent, they would be jumping into marriage the way they do? I really do not think so. For a lot of them, it is a poverty alleviation programme. Even the men know this, one reason some want a woman they are richer than. If she doesn't submit to him, she must submit to his money or back to her father's mud house

It is actually funny she is married, going by her closing statement.

antojack:


Anty in dis wan u have it wrong, have a church member who z working with shell, take home per month 1.2m, Free company Hus, but she always complained of who to eat d money wit, as in husband

Famousqueen:
she just said my mind, the only thing i want in life, is mental peace, happiness, and enjoy my life without anyone restricting me why get married when i will be subjected to pains, commitments, emotional trauma, e.t.c

delugajackson:
Did she just say that marriage is of no benefit to Nigerian women? Entirely ironic!

A typical Nigerian woman enjoys 101 percent benefits in marriage. Go to some families, you will find out that the man is maggi, onion and pepper in the house. The man is paying the rent, the man is paying the children's fees and then still spends on her. Virtually everything is taken care of by the man while all she does is give birth to children by the minute. Worst case, she chats with her friends all day on Facebook and everyother social network. Whoever says Marriage doesn't favor women must be living in utopia and is ignorant of certain realities.

delugajackson:
Did she just say that marriage is of no benefit to Nigerian women? Entirely ironic!

A typical Nigerian woman enjoys 101 percent benefits in marriage. Go to some families, you will find out that the man is maggi, onion and pepper in the house. The man is paying the rent, the man is paying the children's fees and then still spends on her. Virtually everything is taken care of by the man while all she does is give birth to children by the minute. Worst case, she chats with her friends all day on Facebook and everyother social network. Whoever says Marriage doesn't favor women must be living in utopia and is ignorant of certain realities.