I think there is gradual rise of certain males who have done it all - Either married (and now separate or divorced), Have kids, Been in long term relationship etc- and now just not really fussed about relationship any more.

Folks like these have what they want in terms of modern comforts, Jobs, place of their own and what not, but are just not keen a relationship any more.  Anyone male here feel they probably belong to this new generation of Male?

Sometimes, I am wondering if there is really a need for a relationship at time. I mean, Male like this can get sex if they really wanna, but do not see the need to be attached into another round of long term relationship or something?

There will be the occasional "Ohhhhhs and ahhhhhs" when they meet new ladies, but the excitement quickly wear off after a while, and will probably need their own personal space etc, and cannot be bothered with the controlling aspect, and other wahala that comes with relationship at times.

Anyone know what am saying?


I also have a feeling, this may be applicable to some women too.

ElRazur:

I think there is gradual rise of certain males who have done it all - Either married (and now separate or divorced), Have kids, Been in long term relationship etc- and now just not really fussed about relationship any more.

Folks like these have what they want in terms of modern comforts, Jobs, place of their own and what not, but are just not keen a relationship any more.  Anyone male here feel they probably belong to this new generation of Male?

Sometimes, I am wondering if there is really a need for a relationship at time. I mean, Male like this can get sex if they really wanna, but do not see the need to be attached into another round of long term relationship or something?

There will be the occasional "Ohhhhhs and ahhhhhs" when they meet new ladies, but the excitement quickly wear off after a while, and will probably need their own personal space etc, and cannot be bothered with the controlling aspect, and other wahala that comes with relationship at times.

Anyone know what am saying?


I also have a feeling, this may be applicable to some women too.

WE know what you are saying.

Has nothing to do with any "Super Alpha Male" if you ask me. . . just normal human regression to boredom after you've been there and done it all. *Yawns*

stillwater:

Has nothing to do with any "Super Alpha Male" if you ask me. . . just normal human regression to boredom after you've been there and done it all. *Yawns*

You may have a point, but most who are not bothered with relationship is mostly not from boredom. Probably a combination of other factors, but whatever the case, there may be an increase in such type of men in my opinion

~Sauron~:



WE know what you are saying.

yesss there  has certinly  been a rise in the super alpha males but i think women r begining to join that league albeit slowly
i think i might b one of those females---yeah tis cool to b in a relationship----but u get to a point in ur life where u just love ur independence
to b honest relationships can be very stressful and in my short life ive seen a fair bit of it, both casual and serious-----i dont think there is anything new under the sun at least not right now---

stillwater:

Has nothing to do with any "Super Alpha Male" if you ask me. . . just normal human regression to boredom after you've been there and done it all. *Yawns*

It has nothing to do with boredom. . . . .It's just that today's women can stress one to a pulp.
The wahala that comes with getting into a relationship these days is damn too much. . . .Sometimes a man just wanna be a lone ranger.
He wants to take what he wants when he wants it and he wants to drop it when he can't be bovvered.

ElRazur:

You may have a point, but most who are not bothered with relationship is mostly not from boredom. Probably a combination of other factors, but whatever the case, there may be an increase in such type of men in my opinion

A combination of other factors, yes, including boredom. People eventually lose the thrill if they keep doing things repeatedly. It's perfectly normal in my opinion. Relationships is not for the weak hearted, I have to add. If there's an increase in such type of people, can I say many are weak these days?

~Sauron~:

It has nothing to do with boredom. . . . .It's just that today's women can stress one to a pulp.
The wahala that comes with getting into a relationship these days is damn too much. . . .Sometimes a man just wanna be a lone ranger.
He wants to take what he wants when he wants it and he wants to drop it when he can't be bovvered.

I never envisioned you as fainthearted Sauron. Who is that woman that has made you chicken out this way over a mere relationship?

I don't see the need for the glorified title of this thread . How does super, alpha male personify a man who fears commitment. To me, it's one who can maintain his home and chicken out of it.

stillwater:

A combination of other factors, yes, including boredom. People eventually lose the thrill if they keep doing things repeatedly. It's perfectly normal in my opinion. Relationships is not for the weak hearted, I have to add. If there's an increase in such type of people, can I say many are weak these days?

What is normal? An mean of the acceptable variation right? As it stand, we are social animals are we are supposed to be in pairs etc. However, there appears to be more and more of us in my opinion not going this way. Does this make them weak? Not really, it can be viewed as adapting to what life throws at one etc. It is not in anyway a form of weakness.

More and more people staying away from marriage, people trying out different things than what is perceived as normal. I wouldn't think such moves makes them weak in my opinion.

stillwater:

I don't see the need for the glorified title of this thread . How does super, alpha male personify a man who fears commitment. To me, it's one who can maintain his home and chicken out of it.

Please explain to me as to how one who is not bothered, all of a sudden becomes a man/woman that fears commitment? I have a feeling there is difference in both.

stillwater:

I never envisioned you as fainthearted Sauron. Who is that woman that has made you chicken out this way over a mere relationship?

Na una Naija babes o.

ElRazur:

What is normal? An mean of the acceptable variation right? As it stand, we are social animals are we are supposed to be in pairs etc. However, there appears to be more and more of us in my opinion not going this way. Does this make them weak? Not really, it can be viewed as adapting to what life throws at one etc. It is not in anyway a form of weakness.

What has life thrown at you that has made you commitment phobic?   Yeah adapting but I'm also not so wrong for calling it weakness or preferably cowardice if one runs aways from certain things in this case commitment.

More and more people staying away from marriage, people trying out different things than what is perceived as normal. I wouldn't think such moves makes them weak in my opinion.

When you intend not to face the hassles of relationships and all that, you pose yourself as being weak. Alpha male my butt

i often wonder where n when the institution that we know as marriage began
personally, i dont think human beings r biologically designed to be paired for life
and i certainly dont think that u need to be married to the mother of ur child to be a good father or even vice versa
i think society is breaking down and diversifying into ever more complex structures---i like to call it socilal evolution
the old conventional norms r slowly being eroded away probably due to the rise of individualism  and a better understanding of human behaviour
formally rigid  social models r being replaced by fluid, flexible and adaptable  models

~Sauron~:

Na una Naija babes o.

Shame on you.

ElRazur:

Please explain to me as to how one who is not bothered, all of a sudden becomes a man/woman that fears commitment?   I have a feeling there is difference in both.

There are many factors why one would choose to be this way you said it yourself. . .could  be as a result of fear of commitment. I was just highlighting one of the factors your alpha male personify.

vivaladiva:

yesss there has certinly been a rise in the super alpha males but i think women r begining to join that league albeit slowly
i think i might b one of those females---yeah tis cool to b in a relationship----but u get to a point in your life where u just love your independence
to b honest relationships can be very stressful and in my short life ive seen a fair bit of it, both casual and serious-----i dont think there is anything new under the sun at least not right now---

What else can i say.

stillwater:

What has life thrown at you that has made you commitment phobic?   Yeah adapting but I'm also not so wrong for calling it weakness or preferably cowardice if one runs aways from certain things in this case commitment.

When you intend not to face the hassles of relationships and all that, you pose yourself as being weak. Alpha male my butt

Since when is this about me? This is how thread degenerate quickly around here.


How is "not bothered" becomes a fear? What gives you the motivation to suggest those who do may have done it all, or not bothered about relationship are cowards? Seriously, what gives?


In life we have choices, and I think making the choice not to bother, is nothing but an adaptive and coping mechanism. They are Super Alpha simply because they have done it all and have more disposable wealth, time, and resources than their counterpart who are in a relationship. Do not forget also that these set of males do have females catering to and for them, they just do not engage in relationship like their counterpart will/are doing.

stillwater:



There are many factors why one would choose to be this way you said it yourself. . .could  be as a result of fear of commitment. I was just highlighting one of the factors your alpha male personify.

Do you read your own post? First it was boredom, then when that was pointed out to you as not the primary and exclusive factor, you looked at other options to try and pass as a justification. I am fine with your inconsistencies and changes in direction, at least try to be logical about things would you. While there are more than one factor, it is a bit of an unbalanced approach to keep suggest same old point in order to amuse yourself.

vivaladiva:

i often wonder where n when the institution that we know as marriage began
personally, i dont think human beings r biologically designed to be paired for life
and i certainly dont think that u need to be married to the mother of your child to be a good father or even vice versa
i think society is breaking down and diversifying into ever more complex structures---i like to call it socilal evolution
the old conventional norms r slowly being eroded away probably due to the rise of individualism  and a better understanding of human behaviour
formally rigid  social models r being replaced by fluid, flexible and adaptable  models

From my point of view, I think you have offered on of the best probable answers so far.

Yes, man is going outside what is considered the norm now, and exploring different options.

I dunno if you've watched Sex in the city, but from what I saw the idea of having an extra place where one of the couple can go and spend their "own time" alone is actually a good idea. And not far from what some of us are saying here.

Yes relationship is nice, but some do not really think there is nothing more to it, or even over rated perhaps.

follypimpi:

Well said El,u can be wahala free no txt no calls,u only every recieve or make 1 when u wana get down to da low down,no where are u babes,why r u going to the club and so on,FREEDOM indeed.

You are right, I think one of the biggest downer in a relationship maybe after a while is what most men are now seeing as an invasion of their own "man's space". Ladies sometimes do not see this and can just be a kind of "put up with it cuz you love me" type of thing. And yeah it can be vice versa too.

Yea yea yea whatever!

Is it Alpha males u'll r calling it now? Oh well, I guess it's ur synonymn for irresponsible!

Ujujoan:

Yea yea yea whatever!

Is it Alpha males u'll r calling it now? Oh well, I guess it's your synonymn for irresponsible!

It is not that. Most of these people are coming from long term relationship, but they just cannot be bothered. Same goes for women.

^^ They just cannot be bothered? How is that 'alpha maleish'?. I understand perfectly what u mean and like u pointed out, it happens to women too.

But that reaction is clearly as a result of a great disspointment with yourself or your partner from the previous experiences. It's nothing to brag about, trust me!

Follypimpi . . responsible ke! You really shouldnt say that about yourself. Remember wat happened to Pinnochio!

@OP
sori to cut u short- first ur description of an Alpha-male is so offpoint- talk less of a super Alpha-male.

an Alpha-male is a Guy's Guy, sumone evryone looks up to, commands respect/attention wherever/whenever he is. not necessarily the richest but definitely d one most envied- has d best chics @his fingertips, wanted @ d best parties, the creme-de-la creme wud beg to get invited to his parties, ,always in control, neva gets caught pants downs, goes home with the prom queen,,

-i just defined myself

Ujujoan:

^^ They just cannot be bothered? How is that 'alpha maleish'?. I understand perfectly what u mean and like u pointed out, it happens to women too.

But that reaction is clearly as a result of a great disspointment with yourself or your partner from the previous experiences. It's nothing to brag about, trust me!

Not necessarily, you can be happy with a relationship, but as time goes by, you just realise it is not for you any more. We are humans and as such can have a change of view etc.

No the alpha male part comes into it because of the disposable income, freedom, Hapiness etc these type of males have when compared to those who are in a relationship.

snthesis:

@OP
sori to cut u short- first your description of an Alpha-male is so offpoint- talk less of a super Alpha-male.

an Alpha-male is a Guy's Guy, sumone evryone looks up to, commands respect/attention wherever/whenever he is. not necessarily the richest but definitely d one most envied- has d best chics @his fingertips, wanted @ d best parties, the creme-de-la creme wud beg to get invited to his parties, ,always in control, neva gets caught pants downs, goes home with the prom queen,,

-i just defined myself

Definition of yourself is not a representation of these type of males.

Thanks for noting for your input. Next time, can you read the thread as I have explained what makes these people Super Alpha in my opinion.

^^i can read dude -dats y i replied

^^ rotflmao d;

Sometimes, I am wondering if there is really a need for a relationship at time. I mean, Male like this can get sex if they really wanna, but do not see the need to be attached into another round of long term relationship or something?

There will be the occasional "Ohhhhhs and ahhhhhs" when they meet new ladies, but the excitement quickly wear off after a while, and will probably need their own personal space etc, and cannot be bothered with the controlling aspect, and other wahala that comes with relationship at times.

guilty of this what a shame but am getting a rehab if things doesnt change within me.but that is much more later like 10 years