Look my dear all about love is not sex and mostly people do make mistake by allow themselves to be use anyhow on bed and at the end both of them will not marry.Too bad after seen the worst part of one another.Look I will give u the following advice.

1. Don't use sex to know the true love from your partner.

2. Always remember that things will not be as rouse as u want as the relationship is getting longer.

3. Ready to face challenges before and after your wedding.

4. Too long relationship with love making usually result the this type of problem.

Please try to call your boyfriend and explain your mind to him sincerely and accept what comes after.But do not use sex to measure true love again.

null

@halleberry, i think you just had a point and 100% reason to dump his ass but in other words, you said he has changed, why don't you swallow up ur pride and put the shame aside, call him and tell him that you have been taking all he's been doing to you through out the years because you love him, but you now realize love is love when you love and been loved not the other way round. tell him its better for you been alone than to be with him because it make no difference rather it makes you feel more happy and free. end your everything by telling him u will have to let him do his thing because God knows you have tried your best. if he apologize, do not answer him at the moment, but let him beg you for about three days before you answer him. i still insist that the devil you know is better than the angel you don't know. you don't know if the next guy you will date will be more worst so you better start creating a new feeling for him.if he did not beg you or try to make any move, then you can fully made up ur mind but as long as he apologized. girl grab your man and give him a i miss you hug.

what don't u feel?
Has the size of his manhood reduce?
Are you fed up of Him?
Do you believe in Marriage?
Do you still wanna play around ?
Has he changed?
Or is it u that have  changed?
Do u think he is seeing sumone else?
Is sumone asking u out?
Do u still love him?
Do u think love is all about sex?
Where is your mind when he is on top of u?
Do u wish it was sumone else touching u when your boyfriend is touching u ?
Is there sumtin he is doing that is pissin u off when ever u are around him?





GIRL STOP THAT HABIT OF JUST WAKING UP AND SAY U DON'T FEEL , COS TO FEEL ANYONE /ANYTIN IS A CHOICE.
JUST IMAGINE YOU GUYS WERE MARRIED,IS THAT THE WAY U WILL JUST WALK OUT OF HIS LIFE JUST BECAUSE U THINK U DON'T FEEL?
I WILL SAY ,GET YOUR MIND AND THINKIN RIGHT THEN U WILL FEEL WHAT U THINK U DON'T FEEL.
After 3yrs u say u don't feel Talk to yourself and don't allow no one to tell u what to do , cos its your life . You will have to live it without no one .
Your decisions TODAY will affect your Tomorrow , So make the right decision so u wont say Had i know!

@deGLORY, i was just thinking if you can ask your self those questions first before putting it out there to hurt her feelings

Halleberry,ok what are u not feeling in him anymore after three years of dating? I don't know if there are some things he is doing to hurt you in anyway.
Honestly if you think there is no true love between the two of you it is better to quit now than later because any relationship either friendship or marriage without sinererity ,love and trust is nothing.
For me it is not a big deal for two of you to seperate now after three years of dating if need be.

@realpoint, i knew you were gonna make a real point as soon as i saw your name. that the best advice on this thread. keep keeping it real boo

i guess he is not working or is he?do you feel anything for him?never go out with a guy cause of pity.one thing i know is that you might have your eyes on some one else!!!1

HalleBerry U make me laugh

U say u were ready for a relationship n he wasnt

he was running around

LOL

I bet u, he didnt know u were ready, i guess u were also

running around, Y cos u said if u move out he will think u want to

go n sleep with someone! so he must have had that experience or close

to it, hence the insecurity! Poor Guy! I feel u r just having a laugh n u r

wasting his time, the last thing a guy needs at a moment of marriage is

cold feet! n 4 u its COld Body LOL

Guess it all boils down to the point u r not happy, u seek to be with

someone else, no matter what this guy does, and i am sure he has

enough to make u know he is serious, They sing "WHen a Man Loves

A Woman, " But u r not flattered, Guess u'd end up leaving Him

So sad for the Chap

even sex is sad

LOL

what u shud do is to advice him to use stuff lyk GAGGAI(a Hausa term) b4 u start the show.
if still u cannot feel him,it cud b that u are either frigid or over sized. Last option is 4 u to quit
him and look for another man lyk with a bigga size. Is HE broke?

Yes I have. In my case, I left d area in which he was n I realised dat I wasn't even missing him. And after dat I made sure I never slept wit him again. I wasn't seeing anyone infact it took me like 4 years b4 I contemplated any other relationship. I think it's best dat u get out of d relationship b4 it leads 2 any thing serious n u'll find urself stuck in a situation where u cant escape. But b4 u do dat make sure u examine sincerly 4rm deep within u d real reason why u feel d way u do may b its a redeemable situation n b sure u r not just throwing away a good relationship.

Seek God's Intervention,

am sorry i have never been in that situation but the reason why u dont feel him may be because u found someone who knows how to screw u better. anyway try to be in the mood. u will just feel him or just try me oops!! am sorry

If he is the type thats always in your face, u tend 2 lose interest at some point. In this case though, all u need is breathing space u'l c dt things would pick up. But when d fire just burns out, and it seems like it cant be revived, dont waste his time and yours! Talk 2 him, dont waste his time. K?

Then take a walk

dis thoniaslim go just dey yarn rubbish always!!!!!!
wetin b her own sef.
sm1 plz try n check-up her pro n recent posts,,bn consistent wit bn antagonistic n quick @ judging nonsense.

@post,
a friend once told me she aint satisfied wit her sex life coz she's not been grinded d way she wanted.
Reason? she actually gave her hubby d impression she isnt so good in bed wen she realised her hubby dislikes women dat r good in bed(in which category she falls).

My dear,talking things out would solve d problem i strongly blieve.

I still don't believe I will be responding to this thread but after carefully reading all what has been said and seeing it from the perspective of both males and females, I can apply it to my own life experience and truth is maybe now I understand and I feel I should add my own 2 kobo and say it is ok for Halleberry to decide to opt out of her relationship.

Truth is women reason differently from men.

When my GF told me it was over recently after 3 years and siad it's becoause I didn't love her enough or that the relationship was 'dour' I went gaga not undersanding and also thinking maybe she's found someone else, maybes, , but I realise now that it does go more than that, I have tried to make her rescind her decision, think it over, I did and said a lot of things, told her she didn't make an effort to 'spice' the relationship, that she didnt love me as she said she did but it didnt change nothing, R Kelly couldn't have been more spot on, "When a woman's fed up, "

But in the end, if the passion is out, there is really nothing you can do about it. Its her call from there, after all this is only a relationship and its a learning curve for both parties. As men, we will want to try to talk things over, make things work, cos we are practical and if there is a problem, we will try and fix it and get on with our lives but for women it doesnt work out that way, they are more driven by emotions and other things I can't claim to know or understand.

I can't say what will happen from here onwards but truth is if you are meant to be, you will. A marriage is different and yea the same issue comes up, what happens when the romance and passion fizzles out? does friendship, companionship and good communication kick in, how do you spice up the rest of your life with your partner? makes you shudder with the outcome of marital relationships in this generation.

Guess that why it is said that you should marry the flesh of your flesh, bone of your bone, your friend and soulmate LOL.

I don't have answers but I just want to share that I understand better now, that its not that I stopped being me or that I don't love her any much more or less or that I not "the perfect mate" or that she has seen someone "better" or that she doesn't enjoy the sex anymore or many other stuff but, its just how she is "feeling" as a woman about the relationship now and its also what she 'feels' she wants to do right now and WE should respect that.

Its true relationships initially are fun, romantic and very passionate, it may or may not fizzle out, and like someone rightly mentioned earlier, "its relationship that fails but the people involved", its really give and take both parties must come to the party, one person cannot alone sustain it. but I know ladies are a bit guilty of leaving it all to the guy and thats where the passion starts to fizzle, (I may be wrong and this may not be the stereotype) I'm just speaking from my experience.

This understanding has helped me get over the pain of heartbreak and the bitterness of being 'dumped' I am a much better, wiser, stronger person for it today, if truly you are meant to be with that person,

There is nothing more painful than trying to be with someone who doesnt want to be with you anymore,

Halleberry, its your call, but be brave enough to face up to him and explain, it won't be easy, emotions will run as will tears, but in the long run, it will be fine. Good Luck.

May be you should consider me and I will mary you only if you can be paying me monthly. Oh girl take your time with the guy. Who knows he might not just be ready and be planning something big for you in the nearest future. wise up and good luck

eeeeyaaaaaaaa ,the "thing" don slack that,s why _{sorry o}

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

Spice it up. Diminishing returns will always set in. Variety is the spice of life, forget the regular "boring" things and try and be innovative. U'll relish the moments once again.

Halleberry!! i really don't think leaving him will ease wat you are feeling inside. Just talk to him, at least you still have some soft spot for him that why you two make love sometimes. Have a heart to heart talk with him on your feelings towards him and see. I believe there is something you are lacking in the relationship that made you not to feel anything and that thing could be happiness or understanding.

There is nothing so pleasant than talking and understanding each other in a relationship. Trust me, it works like magic. Try it and see.

Try me!

It's a really sad situation. I try to sympathize with you but deep down, I just feel like you have ulterior motives (sorry). You loved him when he was a player, you should love him even more now that he's not but the reverse seems to be the case.

Imagine him leaving you high and dry after three years, would it go down well with you? True, unconditional love means you love this person through thick and thin, so I don't think you ever truly loved him unconditionally.

It's almost clear that you are considering someone else from your post, if that is the case, it's a real pity. It wouldn't kill him if you left him but it would kill him if you left him for someone else. Since you know he's now totally into you, you should be at least satisfied but you are not, If you leave him for someone else, you might just get a dose of your own medicine and if you ever try to go back to him if that happens, he'll treat you like a plague. Karma is real my dear. If you are gonna terminate something that took three years to build, it should be for a darn good reason like infidelity, medical incompatibility not for a skin-deep excuse like "you no longer feel him". Don't get my point wrong and continue half-heartedly, but be ready to face that old hag named "karma" or her daughter named "nemesis"

iykedee:

It's a really sad situation. I try to sympathize with you but deep down, I just feel like you have ulterior motives (sorry). You loved him when he was a player, you should love him even more now that he's not but the reverse seems to be the case.

Imagine him leaving you high and dry after three years, would it go down well with you? True, unconditional love means you love this person through thick and thin, so I don't think you ever truly loved him unconditionally.

It's almost clear that you are considering someone else from your post, if that is the case, it's a real pity. It wouldn't kill him if you left him but it would kill him if you left him for someone else. Since you know he's now totally into you, you should be at least satisfied but you are not, If you leave him for someone else, you might just get a dose of your own medicine and if you ever try to go back to him if that happens, he'll treat you like a plague. Karma is real my dear. If you are going to terminate something that took three years to build, it should be for a darn good reason like infidelity, medical incompatibility not for a skin-deep excuse like "you no longer feel him". Don't get my point wrong and continue half-heartedly, but be ready to face that old hag named "karma" or her daughter named "nemesis"

Well said, Maybe she did have ulterior motives, maybe not. The point is she stayed for 3 years and dealt with his "playa " ways. Relationships are very difficult, and both partners need to commit equal amount of time to endure it works. Yes, sometimes they work, sometimes they don't. Such is life. But if I decide to date someone, it is going to be for the long hault. Why stay in, endure the hard times, then as soon as things are about to turn around, I quit? It makes no logical sense,

Antidote, you are spot on my sister

End the relationship before u make the GREATEST MISTAKE of ur life

~Antidote~:

Well said, Maybe she did have ulterior motives, maybe not. The point is she stayed for 3 years and dealt with his "playa " ways. Relationships are very difficult, and both partners need to commit equal amount of time to endure it works. Yes, sometimes they work, sometimes they don't. Such is life. But if I decide to date someone, it is going to be for the long hault. Why stay in, endure the hard times, then as soon as things are about to turn around, I quit? It makes no logical sense,

Why are u people thinking she could have ulterior motive. The thing is she could have condoned his flirtatious behaviors simply because she was hooked on him and so in love. But there comes a time when a woman can't take it no more, and most times that's when the guy becomes dedicated & serious. When a woman is fed up, no begging can change things except God wants it to happen.

@ poster, forget about most of the guys rantings, guys are like that . The issue is this, when you were deeply inlove with this guy , he was playing hide and seek, always busy not having time for you. And now, he's all luvyduvy and wants to stay committed to you but hellllllllooooo, when you think of all the past lonely nights, unintentionally forgetting your birthday, the slang' pls am busy, will get back to you" and ouch his cold attitude at times ,
Well, i will advise you to let go of your past hurts, and try to relive the wonderful moments between you guyz. Also try and talk to him about the things he did in the past that hurts you. Both of you should sit down and talk, calmly, If this doesnt work, then i guess its time to move on.

get off each other for a while. put your interests in other things apart from dating and see if you miss his company

work on your romance level and renew ur commitment. get deeply romantic and things will improve

NO INSULT INTENDED BUT
JUST GET ANOTHER SEXMATE.