oniema:

I really felt your pain but i think you are the cause of your unhappiness
Dis guy saw who u are and what goes on in you, he reads you and then capitalize on it, you are weak where he is concerned
and you have build your entire life (yet to be) around him, you have soo much fantasize on things you can do together, even without getting to know it and its hard to accept a crashed dream.

My dear let go off it, it is just a mirage and the more you move closer to it the farther it goes, pls and pls move on with your life be around friends and let them occupy your thought so you can dump his own thought.

NOTE:- Its better you cut the communication once and for all and face the music or let it continue and be a slave 4ever

Ifedisky:

Hmmm, waxing lyrical now? So you finally let him go, I believe? How is your response,, taking it well? I think you two were playing games with differing motivations. You just got outplayed. Did you stop to ponder that the guy's dither might actually be his own defense mechanism against the "threat" he percieves from you. Sure he doesn't dread you and fears opening up emotionally only to be left high and dry? You told him ab initio that he wasn't good enough for you, then re enforced that conviction by offering him a conditional relationship i.e, no sex, what if the guy feels you spelt it out the  he's not good enough for you so you best stay at arms lenght while he dams his emotion in a turpor. It's like chess hun, vary your moves, you'll learn more about even urself. That young man might ne an angel ya know?

I thought about it, and have tried everything possible to make sure he understood that I was sorry. I found strange that he never skips a Christmas, easter, valentine day etc without sending me wishes or even on his birthday he called me very early in the morning just to let me know/remind me, so I could wish him an happy birthday. There's many other things that he used to do which are just not coherent like getting nervous if he hear a male voice around me etc. All this got me confused, and you are right I was outplayed. It's time for me to move on though.

Please, what did you mean by:"It's like chess hun, vary your moves"?

fiswu:

@chines4 and St. Richy:

I appreciate your comments, but, as far as I'm concerned, it's over. I'm very slow to decide sometimes especially when my level of interest is high. However, I finally made up my mind. It was a good experience; It opens my eyes on the many things I took for granted, and I discovered another side of me. Anyway, his behavior towards me is the deal breaker. The real me is not tolerant on issues regarding respect. I took some time off to think about myself and I realized that I deserve more because, as "a total 10" with great culinary skills,  I have what most men are looking for everywhere (a Nigerian woman would have said I'm too much lol). Moreover, I love, respect myself and my family. Thus, I only deal with the best in all aspects, but sometimes I do make mistakes too; he is one of them. For some reason, I had forgotten how special, precious and beautiful (inward-outward) I'm. This is not for me. I wish him luck and happiness. Thanks for your time!

chines4:

Ok just be happy

i_am_model:

Reminds me of a situation i've bin into, I've always bin admired by pretty girls and some even want intimacy which i dnt give in to, At a time i noticed i was in deep luv wit dis particular girl which i tried to make her understand but she never wanted anything oda dan frndship. I tried to convince for more dan a year all to no avail. I foundout she doesn't care abt me as much as i do, but then i never stopped loving her. Even wen am dating someone else now, i still love and think abt her more cos i feel she's the one i shuld be with. Since she's not interested, i have no choice dan to let her be. Though i still call her, but dnt bother her abt relationship no more-she neida call nor text except on my bday,

mafolayomi:

pls 4get about him, he is just toying with yr emotion. dont wait until he sends u his wedding text message b4 u dump his backside. ,  a word dey say is enough for d wise

mito:

Hopefully, you'll forget about him soon. cheers!!!

fiswu:

I met a young man over 2 years ago while I was still at university. I was always hesitated about  him because he seemed up to no good like a womanizer, and we never have any relationship. However, I tried as hard as I could to avoid him even though we live in different states, and he didn't show that he really cared about me, but I would always feel the need to talk to him just to make sure that he's OK. I have been advised more than once to quit contacting him. Finally, I found the strength to do so 3 months ago, but it was hell; I ended up depressed to the extent that I could not concentrate on my own life, and did not even have the motivation to start looking for a job as I recently graduated. Then, few days ago, while I was sleeping my sub-conscience dictated me to contact him which I did. Our conversation was to me what oxygen is to my body.

fiswu:

I met a young man over 2 years ago while I was still at university. I was always hesitated about  him because he seemed up to no good like a womanizer, and we never have any relationship. However, I tried as hard as I could to avoid him even though we live in different states, and he didn't show that he really cared about me, but I would always feel the need to talk to him just to make sure that he's OK. I have been advised more than once to quit contacting him. Finally, I found the strength to do so 3 months ago, but it was hell; I ended up depressed to the extent that I could not concentrate on my own life, and did not even have the motivation to start looking for a job as I recently graduated. Then, few days ago, while I was sleeping my sub-conscience dictated me to contact him which I did. Our conversation was to me what oxygen is to my body.

I'm a very beautiful woman and amongst others, there's a successful good man who is dying to marry me, but I just can't get him out of my mind and I would not like to hurt a good person. Tears have become my refuge. Without hearing from him, it's like I'm lost,  I don't know what to do anymore   . I don't know why this is happening to me  .

Please people, I will appreciate your comments!

beeman80:


Please what are your fears? Cos it seems to me that u re so drawn to this dude.If u really enjoy his company then go spirirtual about it by going into prayers.Best of Luck!

What

borie4u:

See it is the truth as i ve been there as there used to be a gal i use to love.We got so close as to the fact that if there is no call between us a day its like hell.If u want to stop communicating wit him it wont work.the only way is to restrict the call until u see that u wil be free but to stop abruptly will get u back to wat u dont want to do.

fiswu:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sle3TQ8Klk4&feature=player_embedded#at=157