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Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! - Romance - Nairaland

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Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by dondada2(m): 12:22am On May 18, 2007
Prelude: we,ve been dating for about 2 yrs now.In the last 6 months things havent been so good between us. First,my friend saw her with another guy in a hotel in Lagos when she was meant to be in school.Worse still,she was supposed to help my sister out on a job search that very weekend.She came up with a funny excuse and said she just cldnt make it,tried to find ouut why,infact i didnt believe until i got there to see she really wasnt there.
She apologised thereafter even tho she denied at first but things havent been well with us since then. She now doesnt respect me,call me or even care abt me .Foolish me,am so much in love with her and begged her to calm down so we cld  get back together. She seemed to agree initially but screams at me for little reasons now, hardly calls and fought with me at the  hotel the last time i went to see her in school.
I talk to her very close friends who really wants us to be together and she has done her bit to kinda talk some sense into her but she just sort of goes off some times.
Now she says she's tired,tried to find out why, her friend tells me she says i refused to fulfil a promise to let her have my car to use in school and some other little things i promised  her.
I would have done that without even a thot  but am kinda struggling right now and things havent been so well like before . I gave her the car earlier on to use in school for a while and it seems to have caught on,my sister needs a car too as i have two even if one is presently in need of serious repairs right now. Dont know whats right to do anymore.Will she come back to me fully if i let her have the car?Someone pls help!!!!!!!
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by uyai(f): 12:34am On May 18, 2007
don dada, i feel your pain. I'll borrow an advice i got from the counselor in charge (Cute-Bottom) you and your love need to sit down and talk. Go away with her for a weekend, tell her how you feel, what is going on in your life and where you want the relationship to go. The car might not be the problem, she might be using the car issue as an excuse to get off on you. Find out what is really bothering her, if truly the car is the only problem, then tell her your true financial situation.

On the other hand, there might be someone else. when there is someone else, partners tend to throw temper tantrums at the slightest provocation.
please try and talk to her. i wish you the best in your relationship.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by wadomi: 12:38am On May 18, 2007
please get all the sex u can and then dump her before she further asks you to build her a house.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by dondada2(m): 1:17am On May 18, 2007
sorry,didnt add that we havent had sex in over 3 months now. she doesnt seem to be bothered whatever i do. have a feeling she aint feeling me no more,but God I love her and feel with a little time,we,ld get back on together,
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by wadomi: 1:28am On May 18, 2007
shio -
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by BlackMamba(m): 2:08am On May 18, 2007
At the moment you're just a mugu for the cheap Bottom. Don't feel bad. Most guys fall mugu once in awhile. Count your loses and move on before you lose more money and suffer more hearthache on this thrash. If you insist to wimp out and stay, be ready to endure the hurt that will surely follow, even if you rob to give her a brand new car.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by cuteass1(f): 10:43am On May 18, 2007
uyai:

don dada, i feel your pain. I'll borrow an advice i got from the counselor in charge (Cute-Bottom)

ROFLMCAO grin grin @ uyai darling, that was funny wink kiss

@ don dada
Atimes i feel sorry for people that fall in love, Cos in as much as love is a wonderful thing and feeling, there are some that get to witness the ugly part of it, which one you ask??

The part that makes a partner walk over the other, and you're so beaten in love that you just sit back and accept it, the part that makes you see and write down your spouse's atrocities and yet not see the situaton as critical as the rest of the world, that part which is so blindly in love that it might not have the courage enough to walk even when they're suffering in misery cry

As sad as it seems, You my dear are in that shoe and it pains my heart so, that a lady like myself would be so cruel, and dubious. But thats just life.

But you my guy, you can't just live with that, i know you're in love, but wasn't it so that love is more enjoyable when both parties are doing the job?? Why would you want to be doing a solo??

Or isn't it obvious to you that the love you once shared (if any) has left the building?? the only thing holding her back is the financial and "car" priviledges she's getting from you.
She was caught in a hotel with another guy?? and what the hell did you say you were still doing with her?? waiting for her to go on a "second missionsry" journey with someone else to another hotel before you know she's playing you for a fool?? What girl will get so non-chalant and less-caring towards her boyfriend just because you couldn't provide her with a car, to go to school with?? what rubbish angry angry angry

Just listen to yourself . . whether we think she'll come back fully to you if you lend her the car?? lmao . . are you sure you're alright?? are you really willing to be her door mat?? to only have her "fully" bacause you satisfied one of her material needs or the other?? Comm'on now, where's your sense of dignity and human appreciation not just for material things, but loving you for you??
Its time to wake up from the slumber wink
What happened to a partner bieng understanding?? or she doen't know you're struggling?? she wants a "bed of roses" kind of life, and you on the other hand are willing to go to the ends just to make that happen, for what??

I can't see any foundation for a relationship here, you guys seem to be on two different ends of the universe, and it might need a miracle to make it work. When the love two people shared isn't there anymore, the goal of a relationship is somehow beaten, and deeping your head in ignorance wouldn't make matters better, only that you'll get more subdued into giving in for all her childish cries angry Please i beg you in the name of God, for the sake of your sanity and hapiness (you won't understand it right now), snap out of it, let her go. You can do so so much better!!! cheesy cool

Good luck.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by bebe2007(m): 11:07am On May 18, 2007
Baby boy, I had to go and look at your profile first before commenting (unfortunately i didnt get any useful info). O! boy are you for real. shocked shocked I thought God had stopped creating  men like you. Wake up and smell the coffee. That girl is not yours ok. Please in heaven's name stop using the word LOVE. What you feel is not love pls. Love is not INSANE, IT DOES NOT CAUSE PAIN, LOVE IS MEANT TO BE PURE NOT CUNNING.  Am so mad at you for beign a softy on this issue. angry angry angry  Please fix your car and give it to your Dearest sister, who will love you forever ok. kiss

The girl (wouldnt use the word BABE for her, cuz she is not one) should go and meet a sugar Daddy to buy her a car, if thats what will make her happy. She nor get Papa wey go buy for her?
You donot need this hassle, go get yourself a good understanding babe. Dump her sorry Bottom.

Please learn from this experience that you dont have to promise a woman heaven and earth to get her to go out with you. Just be real, give and only promise what you can deliver. The whole idea is to get to know her. LEARN FROM THIS PLEASE
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by xjovial(m): 11:24am On May 18, 2007
Yea,My dear friend, I will go straight to the point and I advice u to heed to my advice,,
This is really an eye opener 4 u, Never u show a wman all the Love u have in this world even if u Love her mor than God loved us, I mean,never,ever,never,ever show a girl that u love her that much or else,u will end up been tha laughing stock.
I read ur mail and really touched, as of now there was a time I almost had my neck severed by a Lady way back and that was how I learnt my lessons and tpo tell u the truth,its the girls that keep coming to beg me,
For a girl to request for a car in schoola nd still understands ur condition is not worth the stress, angry angry angry
Men! Com on,are u a fool!!!! angryDump this girl,F, k her hard and I mean with all hardness and all the strength u have them dump her, Dump her, If u klike ,continue to be a MUMU !where she dey,
Remember one thing,Never show women,Ladies,girls all the Love in the world,Give them just 10 percent and u will see that they will always be the one coming to beg u.
She left school and u saw her in a hotel and still contemplating whether u should give her a car, iF u do,U are A big Fool,AND i mean it ,a big one.
Dump that silly Naughty Lady,she dosent deserve it, angry angry angry angry angry angry

One more thing,I have dated close to 50ladies and have seen the good,the Bad and the most Ugly of them all,so bros shine ur eye ,
I Have a girl i love so much now and shes always the one that comes calling anytime we have a little quarel, are u not the man hereI really Love her,ut I dont have to break my head or weep or tell her I love u 100 times,or running after her all day long and telling her,I am missing u,thinking abt u all day long,she will take u as a veryu weak man,
Learn from these ok.
Good luchk and ps keep us posted in here how it wenmt.
Reme, Dump that after F, g her Hard and I mean hard without mercy.
Goodluck. wink wink wink wink
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by Ronke2811(f): 11:40am On May 18, 2007
@ seun
please can u restrict/ delete wadomi frm this site, cos his contributions are always vulguar. which i think is not accepted in this forum.

@ topic
well i will advise you leave the girl. am a female and it doesnt make sense wat she is demanding.
but u have to do this in a mature way, just call her and let her know the reason you want a break.
i think she has been listening to some sort of advice frm her so many friends of late.( u know we ladies are like that)
please reapir the car and keep it to yourself, not even ur sister.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by kike001(f): 11:51am On May 18, 2007
no offence but she sound like a Naughty Lady just tell her dis is gettin too much 4 u to take n u want outta d relationship
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by tseye(m): 11:59am On May 18, 2007
hmmmmmmmmmmmmm brotha, wake up, shes a schemer, theres alot of angels, out here waiting 4 brothas like u, tho its painful,jus give her sometime,if its truly urs, no matter, how hard, shewill come back, it seems someone else is in her life
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by tseye(m): 12:10pm On May 18, 2007
kike, if am dondada will u go out with me
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by cuteass1(f): 12:26pm On May 18, 2007
tseye:

kike, if am dondada will u go out with me

What a silly question??


@xjovial

I'm not sure i agree totally with you on that "love philosophy" of yours of "guys are gods and girls are the love slaves"

In my dictionary, love is sharing, undemanding, and doesn't think of bad intentions, yes its pure and original.
What happened to both parties giving 50:50?? afterall there have been cases of some guys taking advantage of girls' love too (and please don't tell me it isn't true, Cos i see victims here everyday), it actually goes both ways wink

If both parties love each other, then there shouldn't be need of who says "i'm sorry" or "i love you" or "i miss you" or "i want to make love" or "lets go out on a date", it should come natually, that is why you're together in oneness, thats why you love each other, thats why you can count on and confide in each other cheesy
So just bear in mind and remember that what works out for you might not work out for somemone else, Cos there's no stereotype in love. We love differently wink and there are no rules either!!
And in a relationship its always natural for one to love a bit more, but it shouldn't matter who the cross falls on as long as you know the other person loves you and you've got their support, everything and everybody will be just fine and happy cheesy cheesy cool


@ poster
I've given my 2cents earlier already, but you should just know that when you find true love, all your listed problems will solve themselves. Both of you will be giving it all to make it work. What method will work for you?, i'm not sure but you guys will be going with the flow!! cheesy cheesy
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by inze(m): 12:47pm On May 18, 2007
@poster

Well Cute-Bottom our counsellor has said it all, that the only word i have for you.

Read in-between the lines.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by SweetT1: 1:15pm On May 18, 2007
@Don dada
Look here bro'. This girl is not worth a dollar coin ! She is obviously taking advantage of the love she knows you have for her. Leave her alone and find your true love somewhere else. She is wayward, especially when one of your friend reportedly saw her at an hotel with another man. Concentrate on your business/job and take care of your family. "The best revenge in life is living well" . Enjoy your life and find a woman who will appreciate you and your love. Quit wasting time on that "air head" of a girl ! Peace.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by ijogbon(m): 4:21pm On May 18, 2007
@Don_dada

Ha !  cheesy Rejoice for the Lord is your strength  grin

What are you thinking again? You should be doing thanks giving !!!!

My people say : Iku to ye ki O kpa ni, ti O shi ni ni fila, ah ko le kpa ni Mo!!!!!! (What wanted to kill you but missed and knocked off your hat, that thing can not kill you anymore).

Now as I am 'talking' to you now now, use your tongue to count your teeth, oya ahn lehn le !!!!!

You need to play this girl out !!!! You know maybe you can put up her details and the playerz in the house will help you teach her some sense.
Me I can buy Car for this kind of girl O !!!!! wink grin I see the making of a beautiful revenge on your part,  grin
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by luxoire(f): 4:33pm On May 18, 2007
hahahahaha

@cute-Bottom my twin from another mother, took the words out of my mouth, y'all need to sit down and talk, say car,
abi na ur car make her date u b4 or ur personality?, if no want anymore, make she tell u up front, make u sabi how to dey heal ur heart, not torturing u and using car as an excuse,

and war betide her if na material things dey make her look elsewhere, because d day she go find love, she will give all her wealth but still not be able to get it,

and even if u could lend some1 a car, i bet she will make it an issue where u had to choose btwn her and ur sister, so she will know where ur loyalty lies?, madness

my dear,@poster,
if ur as good a guy as u sound, u need a caring and compassionate chick, taht will understand when ur down and when u have she go enjoy am wit u, see me, see wahala, sha love hurts, but dont be a fool for it
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by cuteass1(f): 4:47pm On May 18, 2007
inze:

@poster

Well Cute-Bottom our counsellor has said it all, that the only word i have for you.

Read in-between the lines.

wink wink grin

luxoire:

hahahahaha

@cute-Bottom my twin from another mother, took the words out of my mouth,

LMAO grin grin ABI?? cheesy cheesy
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by luxoire(f): 4:57pm On May 18, 2007
@cutey, yes ohh!!!, no be our fault grin wink
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by Aproko(f): 6:38pm On May 18, 2007
@ cute_ass, you took the words right out of my mouth.

@ poster,
a girl that loves you would not kick you when you are down. this girl has the guts to demand a car when she knows things are not going too well right now. she has the guts to rub your face in the mud by being in a hotel with another man(probably past caring if she is seen or not) just becos you told her to be patient till things improve!!!!

my dear poster, your girl friend will not leave you cos she thinks you are the perfect mugu(i.e she can disrespect you and you will even apologise to her for disrespecting you), she will continue seing her 'aristos' cos she knows theres nothing you can do.

so take a cue from all the other posters, dump her fast.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by moondust(m): 6:50pm On May 18, 2007
she cheats on you and u beg her?!!! Wats up wit u bro?
u r a disgrace to manhood!
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by hotchic1(f): 7:58pm On May 18, 2007
I dont really think your gurl is still interested in that relationship,i still can't understand the reason why cheated and after doing that,she's still ignoring you,i think she's going out with someone else.


I think she's just taking advantage of the luv you have for her,i don't think she's worth all this trouble,even though,ladies tend to be driven by pleasure,i still feel its wrong for your gurl to start acting weird because you can't afford to buy her a car.


Nevertheless,you can still try to sit her down and talk to her,and don't make the mistake of correcting her rather you two should rub minds,listen to her n c if she's got anything thats bothering her,then you can draw a more reasonable conclusion,you will then knw if you can hold on or move ahead.Gud luck.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by davidylan(m): 9:08pm On May 18, 2007
Methinks someone is ripe to go looking for a mature chic here. Leave that small girl alone.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by dondada2(m): 9:30pm On May 18, 2007
Really wanna thank every one for their contributions so far. The funny part of all this is that i seem to share the same feelings on leaving her but being the kind of person i am, just keep telling myself to give her one last chance to see if she'ld come back to her senses.sometimes i even call after telling my self i wouldnt anymore. She said she wants out and i am sure i didnt spend this much energy to have her in the first place. Also for a few days now,we just got ttalking as normal so should i still go ahead or wait a while ?
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by davidylan(m): 10:11pm On May 18, 2007
Be nice to her but be firm, its time to take a long walk. As soon as someone else comes who can give her the car she craves you'll become a door mat again.

On issues like this, sitting down for a talk with her does not come into the picture. Its time to leave.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by xjovial(m): 9:20am On May 22, 2007
@Cute Bottom, ,I understand,yea, 50-50,its ok, but u know that most times it could become only one sided and what happens then, I believe that we should Love with our eyes fully open so that when one or the other party wants to start taking things for granted,then,ones attention has to be drawn to it.

Bros,Don Dada,u know the little problem u have now,, U need someone to take her place and keep ur mind off her for good,if not,u will always feel like calling her up and b4 u know it again, BAM!u ve started again,
Really,dont give it a second thought ok, look for someone to take her place immediately and let the new person understand what u went through and this time,make ur stance clear, Never Love wit binded eyes.
We have caring and beautiful quues out there and so many,all u have to do is to take ur time and believe me,the next person u will get will really appreciate u ok.
Goodluck wink wink wink wink wink wink wink wink
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by Aproko(f): 3:10pm On May 22, 2007
my dear don dada, take a walk and dont look back.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by anon101(f): 3:19pm On May 22, 2007
damn ,,,ur relationship depends on a car , ur relationship is as bad as the cars daily use on ur roads
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by puker(m): 10:42am On May 23, 2007
I just hate it when i read guys cry for gals who do not see them the way they are. Gals who are materialistic. Cmon men she will dump you tmorrow if there is another guy with a bigger car. just forget her and move on. If she sleeps around for that reason then forget her the bleeping bum dosnt deserve you.
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by nawa1(m): 1:43pm On May 23, 2007
angry
Re: Help,my Relationship Doesnt Look So Good,my Gf Wants A Car First! by nawa1(m): 1:46pm On May 23, 2007
oluku- u made me wast my precious time to read all ur sh*t
hoping to see one gud thing about ur b*tch.

u mean say u no know watin u go do?

or u want make we pity 4 u?

abi u just want to increase ur post?


anyway anything you want, e no concern me again. (NA WA has left this tread)

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