Hmmm ok


Meanwhile, Lets Refill your Printer Toner Cartridge Today and Save Cost. Check my Signature for contact.

Noblejohn32:
Good day Nairalanders!
So far, so good "DESIRE" is getting to chapter4. But before i proceed please i need your advice, criticism and words of encouragement. They will go a long way in boosting my morale. Bosses in the house please point out my errors I'll be pleased to learn.
If the story is thrilling please let me know and if it is not let me know too so that I'll know whether to proceed or not.
Special cheers to:
Skubido
Ann2012

Please silent readers should say something. Your words will motivate me.

Just ride on, I wanna get to the end of this thriller, cos it's the reason am still in bed

mrkings84:


Just ride on, I wanna get to the end of this thriller, cos it's the reason am still in bed

I'm loyal boss

13th november 2019? U cant take us backwards IJN. Amen!

Front page things

dimssy:
Front page things

Boss it already made frontpage
can it happen again

Whoah! "DESIRE" has made frontpage the second time.
Thumbs up to my esteemed literati(s).
Merry xmas! I love you all

Following oo
Boss Am waiting for the next Update

Ebus12:
Following oo

Boss
Am waiting for the next Update

i won't disappoint

Noblejohn32:
Please, i need comments
Ghost readers identify! Ah beg

captivating so far. I'm a human reader though not ghost I never die

Nice work op

Sensational work. More ink to pen Jare!!

humorous vigour, ride on chap

Tantalizing even though I didn't get an invite

I imagined the serious faces as they call their names

I nearly died of lafta.

Congrats Brother. You've been featured once again, now going popular on Nairaland. So Elated for the pace.. Every vision glows with motivation. Keep thrilling...

Noblejohn32:
Episode 9b


★Uniuyo campus★

"Vicky i don't understand the meaning of the game you are trying to play" a confused Smart said.
"Oh! you want the meaning of the game huh?" Victoria replied.
"You can't just accuse me on what i don't know!" Smart screamed.
"How dare you go back to sleep with that slut of your girlfriend. Remember we had a deal" Victoria screamed at him.
"And who told you i was fucking a guy behind her back?" A befuddled Smart asked.
"Oh! that is a question, i won't answer but be rest assured that if you go near Vera again, the whole world will view you as a porn star" Victoria said.
"Ok! please delete the video, I'll do anything you want" Smart pleaded.
"You know Vera won't have anything to do with you if the video goes viral" Victoria threatened.
"Then I'll kill you" Smart said shivering in anger.
"Just do what i want and I'll forget the issue. I wonder what a handsome guy like you will be doing with fellow men. It disgust me! but even with that I'll still love you" Victoria said emotionally.
"What you feel for me is lust! I believe in true love and that is what i feel for Vera". Smart said in anger.
"I could release this video anytime" Victoria said and made to leave but Smart dragged her back.
"So what do you want from me?" Smart asked.
"First, i need you to stay away from Vera, then break up with your male friends! I want to have you for myself!" Victoria said.
"You are sick" Smart fired.
"Just give me five minutes, the whole Uyo campus will....."
"I could kill you here!" Smart said running his hands on Victoria's neck.
"That will be the greatest mistake of your life!" Victoria growled.
"But what you said isn't gonna be done easily. I can't ...."
"Just try me and see!" Victoria cut him short.
"Maybe! I'll have to kill you afterall and burn your body then go after anyone i presume is with the damn video" Smart muttered to himself. He suddenly remembered something.
"Victoria! before i consider your deal, can i see the video?"

**************************
★Okon- Eket★

"James the James, James the testimonial!" Peter hailed as he sighted James who was dressed up for an event.
"No deh hail me like say i be politician! Guy go baff today na choir practise" James said as he dusted his black canvas.
"So na common evening service make you dress like say you deh go job interview for shell" Peter remarked.
"That one no concern you! go dress up" James fired at him

"All hail! James the ram director" Udoh hailed.
"Wetin deh do una sef! you don smoke?" James fired at Udoh.
"James my son! na me teach you how to chyke babes! See as the babe fall for you" Harry half-screamed filling himself.
"You deh mad!" James replied.
"Oya gist us, wetin the girl talk for phone" Peter said.
"Bobo! you too deh like gist, anyways she ask me if i don join whatsapp, i come tell am say i be spraypainter" James said.
"Wetin be whatsapp sef?" Okon asked nobody in particular.
"Boys we don late"
"Harry! remember wetin pastor talk!" Peter said.
"Wetin the man talk?" Harry replied.
"Abi you been deh sleep" Peter fired.
"You deh mad! me and you who sleep pass" Peter argued.
"Na only five minutes i been sleep" Harry pressed further.
"How many of you ko baptise?" Okon asked.
"I deh craze! if i wan swimm, my village get river plenty! I no wan make pastor take style bury me for water" Udoh stated.
"The business wey i deh do no ko allow baptism! Hustlers no deh baptize, it kills the spirit" Harry added.
"All baptizers are liable to die young" Peter added his philosophy.
"I don already see that you people are very, very nonsense! If you baptised, holy ghost will dryclean your sin and you will change from your former self to a tear-rubber person" James preached."and when we reach church make we change our name" James added.
"Why!"
"All our names na agbero names! make we change am to Godly names. Na so dem deh do" James said.
"I no fit change my name! My name deh bible" Harry said.
"Sharrrap dia! Your name na demonic name" Udoh fired.
"See! Angel Harry deh for heaven!" Harry said.
"Na him deh serve palmwine for heaven abi?" Udoh asked.
"You deh mad! Your name sef wetin deh tin mean?" Harry asked.
"Udoh was the first bush doctor in heaven!" Udoh said.
"Wetin be bush doctor?" Okon asked.
"U no deh spirit!" Udoh replied.
"My own name deh bible na? Na me been cut person ear" Peter said.
"Oya clap for yourself! Ear-cutter" Harry fired. "If na dis generation, na krikri you for deh! Murderer" Harry said.
"I resemble woman, why you deh call me modara" Peter blasted.
"Oya! Issorite" James said and retrieved his bible, opening each pages and scanning intently.
"Udoh you ko answer broda Adam.
Harry you ko answer broda Abimelech.
Okon you ko answer broda Goliath
Peter you ko answer broda Eli
Me i ko answer Bro Nebuchadnnezar" James said and closed the bible.
"James, your own name deh like botanical name" Harry said.
"I no fit answer that kind name, wetin be Eli?" Peter protested.
"Baba you sabi say Peter been cut person ear for bible. You fit reach dat church now and pastor call police for you" Harry explained.
"Boys climb bike, time don go finish" Harry said.
"That kind stupid name you give me, pray say make i no forget am" Okon said.
They hopped on the bike and rode off

★African church of Jehovah★

Harry and friends bounced into the church and sighted the living choir practising at the tail end. They moved there and sat down. The choirmaster on noticing them got scared a littlebit because their demeanor.
"Please sirs are you for us?" Iboro the choir master asked.
"We deh with una! ride on" Harry said. The choir were rehearsing " God bless you merry gentle men" a traditional carol by Charles Wesley in solfa notation.
"Before we continue, Sirs we would like to know your names". Iboro said.
"Is our names so important?" Harry asked. "No problem, na name abi ?" Harry stood up and cleared his throat.
"I am Harry, my botanical name is Garri, my church name is brother Abimelech! I'm on facebook and twitter, I'm a yahoo singer! Praise, praise,praise the lord God of Ethiopia in bethlehem" Harry concluded and sat down.
"I will not entertain una with newspapers! I am yours sincerely, yours faithfully brother Adam" Udoh said and sat.
"I'm brother Goliath" Okon said and sat.
"I'm brother Eli, Eli rema-sapa-thani!" Peter said with a dramatic movement.
"I'm brother Nebuchadnezzar" James said and sat.
"You are welcome" a stunned choirmaster replied.
"But why do you guys choose to answer those names?" Iboro asked.
"Go village go ask our mama" Okon replied.
The copy of the songs was shared to them.
"Have you guys ever sang this genre of music before?" Iboro asked.
"No i be marlian!" Udoh replied.
"Ok, d is doh,r is re, m is mi,f is ,s is soh,l is lah,t is ,d is doh' in an octave strike.

"Una song deh like magic, na who deh commot this kind song sef, i ko deh sing doh, fa!" Peter exclaimed.
"No it helps you to get the tune, before we take the lyrics" Iboro said.
"Oga, i recommend Zlatan songs for this church" Harry said.
"Ok sirs! You will love these songs with time, solfa notation is a kind of musical note that helps a vocalist get to know the tune of the lyrics.
Not only that there are beats and time signatures that aids one to be able to modulate the song. We have the half beat ; , the full beat : , the quatre beats and lots more. But this carol is in quatre beat with the normal vocal key 'F'. When we talk about keys, we have key A, Ab(flat), B ,C, C#(sharp), D, E, Eb(flat), F, F#(sharp), G. Key G is the highest key for any vocalist and only talented sings that key. Then we have four specific vocals in music. We have the soprano, contralto, tenor/barritone and the bass. These vocals showcases the harmony in music. The other brother with name Nebuchadnezzar has a good tenor voice he will take the third which is for tenor, while you all will take the last line which is for bass. The first two lines are for treble and alto singers so let's practise." The choirmaster said. "We will attack the song after a half silent beat and the modulation is a quatre beat per notes" Iboro breathed.
"James the choirmaster deh call you!" Harry tapped James but the latter was lost staring at Mirriam.





















Sorry to bore you with the long music lectures. I just needed to add it to lay emphasis in the choir rehearsals and not withstanding I am a choir master so i felt like educating my literati(s) on Solfanotation.(for those who don't know about it).
Ghost readers, God is watching you!!
Plagiarist, Gawd of thunder will soon arrive your door steps.

Merry xmas! my esteemed readers, I love you, God loves you best!!!!

John Mfon®

Wow! A character is resounding powerfully with a kinda resemblance.
Guess it's amiss my thought? Lol!!!
Nice one.

Glossystar:
Congrats Brother.
You've been featured once again, now going popular on Nairaland.
So Elated for the pace..
Every vision glows with motivation.
Keep thrilling...

Thanks Boss

Noblejohn32:
Thanks Boss

see ya at the top.

Glossystar:
Wow! A character is resounding powerfully with a kinda resemblance.
Guess it's amiss my thought? Lol!!!
Nice one.

You guessed right Boss

Noblejohn32:
You guessed right Boss

Wow! interesting...

★Chapter 10★
★Uniuyo Campus★

Double wahala!!!

Smart sat on the floor brooding over the previous incident. He tried in his power to threaten Victoria to release the video to him but she won't bulge.
But his instinct never lies, he knew Victoria didn't have the video with her but was just given empty threat. He grabbed the bottle of alomo bitters and emptied the content into his mouth.
He was jolted off his thought by his phone ringing beside him. He sighed in disgust as he received the call.

Philip: Hi loverboy! What's keeping you.

Smart: Do we have any unfinished business.

Philip: Damn! remember the rendezvous i told you about at sheraton. The sugar daddies are present.

Smart: I'm not interested in any party. I have a lot to do.

Philip: Bleep you bastard! Are you gonna keep me this way!!

Smart: Buddy! I'm with my girl at the moment. Bleep yourself! Bleep the sugar daddies!!
The call was disconnected.


★ Sheraton Hotel ★
Philip slammed the phone in anger. He couldn't believe Smart could play that hit on him and the cult they both belong.

Sugar mountain was a secret male cult strictly for only gay(s). To the outside world, it was a social club.
It was a cult men could hook up with other men without stress or fear of stigmatization. That was the cult Smart and Philip belonged.
After every three month, the cult do host a party bash.
Philip sat in anger when he noticed he was the only single guy as others were in pairs dancing to Lilwyane's track. The thought of his lover being in the arms of a woman made him sick in the stomach. He decided to take law into his hands.
Vera is gonna pay for this!!!
He proceeded to meet the lord of their cartel who was called doctor on the podium.

He met doctor lost in the fumes of pleasure as a man gave him a lap dance. He tapped him twice.
"Who dare battle the king in paradise" doctor screamed in anger.
"Doctor it is me" Philip screamed. They could barely hear themselves.
"Who are wa!" Doctor capped.
"I am rugged Philip the philopa baptised by the true God in caanan a land of milk and honey!" Philip introduced himself in the sugar tongue.
He anchored doctor and led him as they struggled through sweaty bodies until they got out of the hall.
"Doctor! Matters deh and we gast table am for panel" Philip capped.
"Indulge your fada!" Doctor said and sniffed in cocaine from a container.
"Smartaly deh play non-entity" Philip said.
"Who be Smartaly? Booze don full my brain i no fit reason" Doctor said.
"Smartaly my baby na! baptized in Italy by kariabities" Philip said.
"Ohhh! You mean your kuku? Why he no come the party" Doctor said.
"He wan play us" Philip added.
"maga you staunch die! I been even hear say the guy no deh gree identify" Doctor screamed.

"We gast play am ethical!code4!! And i no fit let my kuku fall inside well" Philip capped.

"We ko play am inside life! I ko personally show face for dat case" doctor said.

"Make i arrange buddies! We ko abduct the bitch! I gast drill her smelly pussy with a drilling stick" Philip said and anchored doctor.
"Everly i deh always believe your paroles! No make any pussy steal your kuku" Doctor said and walked past him into the hall.

"Vera paul, microbiology student!" Philip muttered to himself. He picked up his phone and made a call.

"Valley! i deh come your crib arrange groundnut and chickenlaps.

No para me with question! Just make sure say the chicken lap deh ready!" Philip said and disconnected the call.
"Hey! Why do you need to leave the party ground for just a lap of a chicken when you can have a whole chicken here to yourself! Is it barbequed, grilled or fried" a male waiter said. Philip turned in shock "No don't worry, there is a particular lap i need! Never mind" Philip said and turned to leave but he felt a strong hand on his shoulder.

"I've been watching you closely! You are tensed. Is this your first time with the men" the waiter said and romanced Philip's biceps.
"Bleep!" He muttered.
"A quickie won't waste my time" Philip muttered and engaged the waiter in a passionate kiss.

***************************

★Okon Eket★

Harry and friends groaned like a female dog on heat during the choir practice session. They never got their bearings as they literaly spoilt the carol with their croaked voice.

"Amen!" Iboro the choirmaster screamed at Okon to stop singing but the latter kept nodding his head and singing.
"Brother Goliath issorite! We are not in a battle field" The frustrated choir master screamed. Right from the moment Harry's crew moved into the church, the practise session automatically turned into a comedy session.
"Brotherly! no vex i just catwalkwed into the spirit" Okon said and cleaned his face with the aid of his towel. He had been sweating during the course of singing.
"Choirmistress!" Okon screamed.
"Is choirmaster not mistress" the man corrected.
"You be man? Just because you don grow small moustache! You sabi give woman belle?" Okon said.
"Jesus" Others gigled. To the rest of the choristers, the session was too interesting and hilarious.

"Choirboy! abi una ko pay me for my 'efforted effort' i don sweat finish" Okon said.
"You are doing it for the lord" Iboro said.
"Tah! no be God send una to open this church! God no deh when una pastors and prophet deh collect money, una ko pay me!" Okon pressed further. "Brother Goliath Enough! You have been disturbing this church" Iboro screamed like a bull caught with the horns.
"Bros respect yaself no deh talk to me anyhow!" Okon fired.
"How dare you challenge me, do you know my age!" Iboro screamed.
"How many years you be? the person weh dem born weh follow the person wey dem born after me senoir you" Okon charged.
"Abeg! Calm down brother Goliath! We are not here to trade words" A man tried to pacify the situation.
"Warn am say make he no try me again! I ko use karate skills beat am" Okon said.
"Okon you don learn karate before?" Peter asked trying to stiffle his laughter.
"Na me be karate champion for my village!" Okon boasted.
Their chants laughter and screams attracted the senior pastor from his parsonage.
"I can see you all are mad in the spirit that is why you have forgotten where you are?" Pastor voiced in anger.
"Sir i don't know which gate of hell this men came from" Iboro said in anger.
"Hello friends! I can see you all are new members, can i know your names?" The pastor asked.
"I'm brother Nebuchadnezzar" James said.
"God have mercy! Is that your real name?" The stunned pastor asked.
"Oga! na so i see am" James said
"Many people do not know the implications of a name! Do you know who Nebuchadnezzar was?" The pastor asked.
"He was a village head!" Peter answered from his seat.
The pastor sighed and pointed at Udoh who was already in deep sleep.
"Can i know your name?"
"I'm brother Adam" Udoh said amidst yawn.
"Why are you sleeping in the church?"
Udoh kept silent.
"What of you?" He pointed at Peter.
"I yam Eli" Peter said.
"Are you a prophet?" Pastor asked.
"No a hustler, but i use to prophesy when i drink udeku" Peter said.
"What is udeku?" Pastor asked, the question made everyone laugh.
"Pastor, udeku is anionting water"Peter replied.
The choirmaster whispered to the pastor and he turned sharply to Peter. "So you do prophesy after drinking beer! Who do you normally prophesy to?" Pastor asked.
My landlord! When the man deh disturb me for house rent. I ko just tell am: Ogaland! If you disturb me again, the lawd Gawd of Ethiopia will pour thee acid" Peter said. The choristers were thrown into another session of laughter.
"And who told you that God is from Ethiopia?"
"You no sabi say Jehovah na Ethiopia name?" Peter fired back.
The Pastor nodded his head in pity.
He turned to Okon and pointed at him.
"I'm brother Goliath"
"Holyghost! Who named you guys?" The pastor asked in awe.
"Pastor! na my baptism name be dat" Okon replied.
"Do you know who Goliath was?"
"He were a fighter" Okon replied.
"And do you know that he was killed by a little child"?"Pastor asked.

"Na ojoro! David been deh far away deh throw stone! If to say he come near Goliath, deh for chop am like biscuit" Harry said.
"So you mean the bible is lying?" The pastor asked.
"Oga! quote me right! Goliath been beat David but bible no write am!" Harry said.
"May God forgive you" The pastor said.
"Same to you!" Harry muttered under his breath.
"I can see you guys are still in the world. John3vs16 says 'for God so loved the world and he sent his only begotten son and whoever believe in him will not perish! My brothers even with your atrocities, God loves you. He sent his son to die for you"
"No be me! He no die for me!! I no send any angel to die for me!!!" Okon said.
"He died for you and me! are you ready to give your life to Christ?" The pastor asked.
"So who been deh with my life before?" Peter asked.
"Satan!" The pastor replied.
"Back to Satan! no, sender" Peter said.
James moved to the podium.
"Are you ready to transfer your life to Christ?" Pastor asked.
"Eh! but wetin we ko use do the transfer: na atm, bluetooth or Xender" James asked.
"My People Perish because of ignorance!"

"Pastor no talk dat one! I be graduate" James exclaimed.
The pastor prayed and James kept shaking as if he was under anointing.
"Sharramalabo! Ebenebetitus!!" James kept screaming in arabic and jerking like an slowpoke.
"It is done! You are now a new creature" The pastor said and the whole church clapped.
"Brother Nebu! Pray for us to disperse" The choirmaster said as the Pastor left.

"God of Moses!
Be with us, we thank you for our daily bread, we thank you for our daily soup! Recieve double twaile!
God any power that want to rise i command you to sleep and wake up!
Father bless us like dangote! I push all the demons into the well!
We shall never commit suicide!
Fada any fine girl in this place that want to commit abortion, give her suicide! I say give her suicide.
Any ashawo that will leave this place to club, fada give her accident, break her leg! The man that will Bleep someone wife, fada give him legover.
Fada give our enemies HIV.
Fada our leaders that are chopping our money, fada give them block head! Fada blind their eyes!
Fada any lady that want a job, fada give her jobss! Any man that want a wife, fada give him wifess! Any couple old or new that want a child, fada bless them with football team!
Fada pick my call! Fada i transfer my life to you, keep an safe incase i need am anytime!
God haff mercy! Amen"

The congregation couldn't with hold their self as they laughed and kept hailing Brother Nebu!
James quickly left to meet Mirriam
"Hello!" James greeted but Mirriam stared at him and began laughing.
"Sorry! Just that i can't help it" She said amidst giggle. "You and your guys are comedians".
"Thank you! So how are you?" James asked.
"I'm fine, so can i call you James?" She asked.
"Yea! You fit call me anything! Mirriam i love you like mad" James confessed.
"Pardon?"
"Wetin be pardon? I say i love you" James said.
"Excuse me! Because i gave you an audience shouldn't give you the temerity to tell me thrash" Mirriam said and walked past him but he ran after her.
"Mirriam abeg no go" He said and held her hand.
"I'll just spank you, what do you take me for?" Mirriam asked in anger.
James was totaly confused! A lady that was so jovial to him from the inception was now an iron lady. He recalled Tupac Shakur favourite verse. 'NEVER GIVE UP, THE WORLD AINT A BED OF ROSES! THE ANGELS GOT YA BACK".

"Mirriam abeg no treat me like this, i wan to go on a date with you" James pleaded.
"Then you must be a fool!" Mirriam barked. He made to hold her hands but he was given a deafning slap.
He rubbed his cheek in confusion and spat blood.
"Nebu! That one hard pass you" Harry said.
"The girl no sabi!" James said.
"That one no get your time! i no deh like ladies weh deh slap man" Harry added.
"Never give up" James muttered.
"You say?"
"Na me ko marry dat lady" James said.
"Ok that means you deh ready to collect more slap?" Harry mocked.
James ignored him.
"May the Lawd God of Jericho give your cheek strength!" Harry prayed.


DESIRE®
John Mfon

Notice! Notice!! Notice!!!

Dear esteemed literati(s), Chapter 10 has been modified. If you read the very first update please make a 'U' turn and check on it again for clearer insight.

Thanks and God bless you all.

Correct niggarr
Me dey feel d tori

This Guy Is Too Much What An Interesting Story,abeg Next Update O

Fresh episode loading.....

I love d story.... We are waiting for more episodes

I wish to apologise for the lack of update. Believe me!, it is not my fault but circumstances beyond my control. I'll try my possible best to deliver the best

John Mfon®

10b

When love becomes an obsession, it comes with an obstacle-course which both parties has to partake in and everything in that relationship becomes odious. A relationship built on obsession will make one physicologically claustrophobic. Never get into a relationship that will kill your visions or kill yourself.
Peace of mind is real peace!
Forget obsession, Try love!
Forget being the boss, Try being a patner!


★ Uniuyo Campus ★

A mercedes benz was seen plying the street to Harmony lodge. The car parked ten metres away from a storey building and three men alighted from the vehicle.
"Monitor that building and watch out for the girl" Philip whispered to his men. He put on a cap to disguise his appearance and left to a mini bar.

The men watched keenly and soon spotted the lady. They confirmed her facial features from their device and one of them signalled Philip with a whatsapp message.

"Hello pretty!" Philip greeted and blocked Vera's passage.
"Hi" Vera replied and made to pass.
"I need to tell you something" Philip said and retrieved a pistol from his waist pocket.
Vera gasped in shock and fear.
"I've not done an....thing wrong" Vera stuttered.
"Yea! I know and i want you to move silently as if nothing happened" Philip said and returned the pistol to its initial position.
Vera was extremely terrified, she couldn't control her self because of fear and she let out a 'powerful fart'.
Philip became confused as he inhaled the 'gas'. Vera released another round of fart and Philip's stomach rumbled.
He began gasping for breath.
"You bitch! Did you drink from a soakaway?" Philip asked in a muffled tone as he covered his nose with a scarf.
"I'm sorry, i ate banga stew with boiled beans" Vera said in fear of the unknown.
"Banga kill you there! Do you wish to give me a heart attack?" Philip said.
"Brahhhhh! Papapa Braaah!
Vera released another 'earth-breaking' fart.
"I'm sorry! It is not my fault! I cant control myself" Vera sobbed, Out of tension she urinated on her trousers.
The stench of the urine coupled with the fart paralysed Philip and Vera took to her heels.
"Damn you!" Philip screamed and instinctively pulled the trigger but missed squarely.

"Move into the car, lets go after her" Philip screamed at his men.
"Broz! the sound don alert every soul make we find our own way" One of the men said.
"We die here! If i don't get that boyfriend snatcher let my generations die young! I fit no back down when the paroles never set" Philip cursed.
"But how she fit take escape?"
"The bitch na messing machine! Her mess don break my kidney" Philip gasped.
Philip and his crew alighted from the vehicle and chased after Vera in nitro speed.

★Okon Eket★

"James thou art weak!" Harry said with hands on his head.
"Girl slap me? I no for chop!" Okon said to a brooding James.
"I dey confuse!" James thought aloud.
"Brother Nebuchadnezzar! Na dat name deh disturb you" Peter said.

"No be say Mirriam no for accept you but she deh think of how she ko deh call you!" Udoh grinned.
"She ko be like: Nebu my love! Chadnezzar my honey! I wan money to barb hair" Harry said.
"Her inlaw sef ko deh fear your name! One lady for church been even ask me whether you be Babylonian!" Harry said, laughing.
"Wetin be Babylonian?" Okon asked.
"I no sabi?" Harry replied.
"Why you no ask the lady the meaning? Idiot!" Okon said.
"I get idea" Udoh screamed.
"Which can idea you get? For your life you don reason better thing before?" Peter fired.
"You deh mad! Guys if James write love letter give that girl, she ko fall" Udoh said.
"Yes na true talk, but James no fit speak good english how he ko take write letter" Okon added.
"You deh mad! Who no fit speak english! You fit speak?" James fired.
"Ok make a speech" Okon said.
"Wetin be speech!" James fired.
"Ok James and Okon debate on the topic that says 'MY LANDLORD IS BETTER THAN ME'. Opposition or proposition" Harry stated.
"I'm am a man! God is my father! I don't haff a fada because my mama was being Bleep in the darkest night...."
"Oya sharrap ya dirty mouth! wetin you deh vomit!" Harry screamed.
"Okon, can you understood your useless introduction, no give us biography!" Peter said.
"My landlord cannot be better than me because i didn't kill his fada
point 2: i didn't Bleep his daughter.
Point 3: i no deh look him wife for baffroom becoz i am an integrity man and i get prestige!" James stated.
"No vex wetin be prestige?" Peter asked.
"No be me write 'dikishtionary' James defended.
"Sharrap dia! no be you write wetin? Pronounce am again!" Harry said.
"Dick...ish..." James tried to pronounce but was interrupted.
"Dick! Na dick you wan pronounce!" Harry screamed.
"Simple word 'dicdictationary'" Harry pronounced.
"Jesus my fada fada i shall not die! Harry you say na wetin?" James screamed.
"You sabi Wole Soyinka! Na me been teach am for primary school! No deh insult me for book" Harry said.


To be continued.........

Noblejohn32:
10b

Vera was extremely terrified, she couldn't control her self because of fear and she let out a 'powerful fart'.
Philip became confused as he inhaled the 'gas'. Vera released another round of fart and Philip's stomach rumbled.
He began gasping for breath.
"You bitch! Did you drink from a soakaway?" Philip asked in a muffled tone as he covered his nose with a scarf.
"I'm sorry, i ate banga stew with boiled beans" Vera said in fear of the unknown.
"Banga kill you there! Do you wish to give me a heart attack?" Philip said.
"Brahhhhh! Papapa Braaah!
Vera released another 'earth-breaking' fart.
"I'm sorry! It is not my fault! I cant control myself" Vera sobbed, Out of tension she urinated on her trousers.
The stench of the urine coupled with the fart paralysed Philip and Vera took to her heels.
"Damn you!" Philip screamed and instinctively pulled the trigger but missed squarely.

"But how she fit take escape?"
"The bitch na messing machine! Her mess don break my kidney" Philip gasped.

.


To be continued.........

This got me cracking so bad, messing machine osheyy

Weldon OP

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