tboy1:

No it is not

yes it is!
and woooooooooooooooooooort? didlo?? seriously?? yeparipa! what was the mum doing in her room? goodness!

queensmith:

yes it is!
and woooooooooooooooooooort? didlo?? seriously?? yeparipa! what was the mum doing in her room? goodness!

That is not the perfect representation of the average Nigerian family . . . Those kids are kinda weird

Yeah the mum found the Dlido and wanted to give it to charity . . . the mum did not know what she was holding, if not she would have prayed for Julie

^ Didnt the shape and look of the Love Machine give it away? I couldn't stop laughing. Overall, I think it was a fair representation sha, but I absolutely couldn't stand Ayo, aargh!!!

naijababe:

^ Didnt the shape and look of the love machine give it away? I couldn't stop laughing. Overall, I think it was a fair representation sha, but I absolutely couldn't stand Ayo, aargh!!!

LOL . . . the mum did not know what it was. Was it not the same woman asking were they Raiping the woman on the TV when her husband was watching two ppl probably having rough sex on the tv 

I could not stand Ayo
The other son is ok but the random slapping thing shows he's also weird
Julie - SNM
They should also look into their youngest child's weight. . . for a 15yr old she looked 24

And the fact that it's shaped like a phallus didn't elicit a guess? The slaps were odd I agree but when some of the things that me and my siblings got up when we were young, it doesn't look that odd. But then I guess they are not that young sha. Olu, the younger was almost invincible, dude just did his thing.

tboy1:

That is not the perfect representation of the average Nigerian family . . . Those kids are kinda weird

Yeah the mum found the Dlido and wanted to give it to charity . . . the mum did not know what she was holding, if not she would have prayed for Julie

How many nigerian families are you familiar with in london?
the kids are not wierd at all! boys/men born bred in hackney RAP! thats what most of them do, it might seem wierd to you but this is the ghetto an thats how things are!
ayo is a very responsible guy who has done alot with himself, to me the family are amazing and like every other middle class nigerian family they have thier issues, in the end they are still there for each other!

I just finished watching the show i loved every single moment of it! i think it was brilliance! the adeshinas are a beautiful family!

^ Word!!!

naijababe:

And the fact that it's shaped like a phallus didn't elicit a guess? The slaps were odd I agree but when some of the things that me and my siblings got up when we were young, it doesn't look that odd. But then I guess they are not that young sha. Olu, the younger was almost invincible, dude just did his thing.

The mum probably thought it was a microphone or something similar. Yeah i liked olu . . . dude just played video games and went to work - just the slap thing annoyed me

queensmith:

How many nigerian families are you familiar with in london?
the kids are not wierd at all! boys/men born bred in hackney RAP! thats what most of them do, it might seem wierd to you but this is the ghetto an thats how things are!
[b]ayo is a very responsible guy [/b]who has done alot with himself, to me the family are amazing and like every other middle class nigerian family they have thier issues, in the end they are still there for each other!

Answer to your first question - Not Much

How do you know he is a responsible guy? also what has Ayo done for himself? Except going to Uni to get degree and working from home part-time building websites?

He was the most annoying on the show followed by Julie

ooo i dunno about ur universe of superheroes!

but in this country- getting a degree followed running a successful business that generates sufficient profit is a great achievement!
whether he does it part time or not ( and i really dont think he does) is irrelevant. what matters is that hes making money! he does look after his family and defend his siblings, just because you dont like his personality (alot of people dont) doesnt mean he hasnt done well for himself
give credit where credit is due! I have enough respect for the boy esp since I know what he has done for himself isnt common in the community!

I also found him annoying but julies issues got to me more- i still respect them both sha, people are not without their flaws!

Responsible guy ke Each to their own sha.
The guy lives at home with his parents, sleeps all day. At 27, he is still rapping up and down the whole place hoping to be discovered. I doubt his "successful business" can sustain him were he to stay alone not to talk of if he decides to marry.
Now if you want to talk responsible, the Olu guy is very responsible and very young

vanitty:


Responsible guy ke Each to their own sha.
The guy lives at home with his parents, sleeps all day. At 27, he is still rapping up and down the whole place hoping to be discovered. I doubt his "successful business" can sustain him were he to stay alone not to talk of if he decides to marry.
Now if you want to talk responsible, the Olu guy is very responsible and very young

is that what you got from the show? you might need to watch it again!
he lives at home because his parents dont want any of them to move out until they are married
if u paid attention u will know he was living with his girlfreind when he thought he got her pregnanat, I can assure you ayo will have no problem looking after himself, he is known for what he does and is very succesful with it! The whole point of being self employed is choosing how you work, whether he decides to work all day and sleep at night is his choice, so long as the job gets done!
His rapping is his hobby, might not be my style but i wont take that away from him, at least he has a job! an enjoys what hes doing!
they are all responsible and have done well for themselves, olu is also very lovely i know olu well and thats why hes described as the 'goldenboy'

I can only deduce from what I saw . I don't know the family personally, might be clever editing or whatnots, but from what I saw of Ayo , he isn't .  .   .   .   .  .  . but then again we all have our own definition of "responsible"

^ I won't call Ayo irresponsible, lazy and maybe selfish yeah. Plus the whole idea of chasing a rap career at 27 is just naff imo sha

even with what they showed, obviously hes not the most likable person personality wise but he has his life in a good place- he enjoys his rapping there is nothing wrong with that, this is how all famous rappers start out but I wont because of that brand him as lazy or irresponsible

tboy1:

The mum probably thought it was a microphone or something similar. Yeah i liked olu . . . dude just played video games and went to work - just the slap thing annoyed me
Answer to your first question - Not Much

How do you know he is a responsible guy? also what has Ayo done for himself? Except going to Uni to get degree and working from home part-time building websites?

He was the most annoying on the show followed by Julie

t, honestly what is so bad in Ayo doing a part time thing at home and following his dream on the side while still young?

The UK is not Nigeria where one has to follow the one-lane track ASAP.

In regards to the slap, I see nothing wrong with it. It is done in pure jest and obviously helps in the siblings' bonding, as it makes them laugh with each other.

queensmith:

is that what you got from the show? you might need to watch it again!
he lives at home because his parents dont want any of them to move out until they are married
if u paid attention u will know he was living with his girlfreind when he thought he got her pregnanat, I can assure you ayo will have no problem looking after himself, he is known for what he does and is very succesful with it! The whole point of being self employed is choosing how you work, whether he decides to work all day and sleep at night is his choice, so long as the job gets done!
His rapping is his hobby, might not be my style but i wont take that away from him, at least he has a job! an enjoys what hes doing!
they are all responsible and have done well for themselves, olu is also very lovely i know olu well and thats why hes described as the 'goldenboy'

Thank you.

Responsibility is not only about working 9 to 5. He is definitely more interested in his creative side and it seems some Nigerians are struggling with understanding anyone that is not a doctor, engineer, architect, lawyer etc. He is still within an age range to explore. Only God knows where they will get entertained in 9ice, Tuface, Timaya etc are all in the office.

The only child with issues in the house for me is Julie Adeshina. She needs serious self-realisation or help if she can not do it on her own.

I can't blame Ola (the youngest child) for anything. I completely blame the parents for her weight! They did that to her, she had no-to-limited control. It is completely a parent's responsibility to control the weight of a child of that age. And it is obvious they had been failing her in that respect since she was a child and are jeopardising her future self-esteem, self-respect and happiness.

I did watch some episodes of the family and while they are an "average" family, i think most of them have issues like any other family.

The parents - at least they werent forcing the children to go to church apart from the Ola, which the poor child probably does out of duty. I did see in the last episode the parents played a tape that showed Julie looking completely uninterested in church . I dont know why they made her go if it was against her wishes.

Ayo - seems like a likable chap and seem to be able to control his siblings especially the unstable julie. If living at home helps him in saving money to buy a property then fine. Not very sure of the working from home thing but his parents are not complaining.

Julie -  I do feel she is misunderstood a bit. She does have a strong personality and quite defensive and wants to feel appreciated but the mistake she makes is she is always critical of others and suspicious of their motives. She doesnt trust other's opinion of her and finds correction as being unappreciated. She will struggle in any relationship with a man unless he is a very quiet type and doesnt mind her expressing herself all the time. I have an aunt like that. The husband never talks and it is common knowledge that she wears the "trousers" in the marriage. But if it works for them, so be it.

Olu - Quite boring, at least doest everything expected of him. A parent's delight.

Ola - I really liked her in the series.so sweet natured but for her weight. While her parents have contributed to her weight issues, she is now a teenager and is now responsible for her weight.

I am going to disagree with you slightly on some points though.

Imani:

I did watch some episodes of the family and while they are an "average" family, i think most of them have issues like any other family.

The parents - at least they werent forcing the children to go to church apart from the Ola, which the poor child probably does out of duty. I did see in the last episode the parents played a tape that showed Julie looking completely uninterested in church . I dont know why they made her go if it was against her wishes.

I don't think they force Julie to go to church. The only person forced to go to church in the household is the minor, Ola.

The episode you alluded to about Julie being disinterested in church is when they were celebrating the fathers's birthday in church. It is only reasonable for her to go if she wants to be part of the celebration.

Imani:

Olu - Quite boring, at least doest everything expected of him. A parent's delight.

Nothing wrong with a good boy. 

Imani:

Ola - I really liked her in the series.so sweet natured but for her weight. While her parents have contributed to her weight issues, she is now a teenager and is now responsible for her weight.

It is hard for anyone to lose weight, lest a child. It is even harder especially when one has reached the weight she has reached.

Any physical activity with that bulk is hard and the taste bud is acclaimatised to the junk food. The fatter people get, the harder it is to lose weight. The majority of the fault lies with her parents.

o yea i feel i need to add, ayo did have an office before it was on top of the resturant in dalston but he had to move because they were renovaying the building

I'm still wondering what this has to do with politics obviously there is favoritism being played by the Mods for not removing it from the politics section.

watched a few episodes of this - my view on the family members

mum: very loving, hard working, supportive and a good mum

dad: a bit spaced out, looks bored most of the time, but hardworking and loves his kids

ayo: my favourite, funny, self deprecating, very down to earth, honest, very likeable

julie: omg awful awful awful, desperately needs anger management classes has self esteem issues hence her very antagonistic attitude towards siblings especially baby sister, may have been a victim of bullying in school.

Olu: easy going, amiable and even tempered

Ola: cuddly, respectful to her siblings, but might drift away from siblings later in life due to different educational background.

All in all a nice family with good values and very close knit.

just to add - i think Julie has been spoilt by mum and dad hence her disrespectful attitude to everyone in the house, notice how mum is afraid of even confronting her when she is being rude, i remember watching one episode where she was talkign to mum and dad as if they were her age mates - it really pissed me off, the fault lies with the parents, for whatever reason they walk on egg shells whenever they are around her and this is why she has evolved into the monster that she is today, she is going to find it really difficult to get on in life if she continues with that type of attitude.

cap28:

just to add - i think Julie has been spoilt by mum and dad hence her disrespectful attitude to everyone in the house, notice how mum is afraid of even confronting her when she is being rude, i remember watching one episode where she was talkign to mum and dad as if they were her age mates - it really pissed me off, the fault lies with the parents, for whatever reason they walk on egg shells whenever they are around her and this is why she has evolved into the monster that she is today, she is going to find it really difficult to get on in life if she continues with that type of attitude.

I think the same; They let them off saying things like'they are british thats the way they talk'
Instead of making it clear they should never talk to them like that! but julie is generally very rude she even talks to her older brother that way too!

and although ola is overweight, I like how the parents never made a mountain out of it because thats worst than anything! She doesnt have self esteem issues and is a very happy child, even though im very sure she is attending a school where all the girls are skinny and self obsessed. Ola is very spoilt but will still have confidence in herself, thats all that matters!

queensmith:

I think the same; They let them off saying things like'they are british thats the way they talk'
Instead of making it clear they should never talk to them like that! but julie is generally very rude she even talks to her older brother that way too!

and although ola is overweight, I like how the parents never made a mountain out of it because thats worst than anything! She doesnt have self esteem issues and is a very happy child, even though im very sure she is attending a school where all the girls are skinny and self obsessed. Ola is very spoilt but will still have confidence in herself, thats all that matters!

Julie needs to be checked into a counselling session asap - i think she's angry at the world, i think i understand where she is coming from as i have a young daughter myself , she is a young black woman growing up in a world where black women have no voice and are virtually invisible, however she has a loving mother who she can lean on for assurance, there arent many support systems for black people and black women in general in the UK and i think this feeling of isolation has manifested itself in the anger that she feels but i think she needs to get rid of the anger through counselling and engaging in activities which will restore feelings of self worth. 

Ola is lovely, she is innocent and cheerful, my only concern is her weight- i think mum needs to spend more time with her and give her more guidance on nutrition and personal appearance, she's now at an age where she will want to start dating and she will therefore need to start changing her diet, and paying more attention to how she looks, other than that she seems well rounded and confident.

lol- no julies just spoilt! But yes she does need councilling

I disagree on the ola point though, I dont think her mum should start feeding her nonsense about how she needs to lose weight to date, Overweight people date too! Thats exactly what causes 'julie type' insecurities in a woman. If she wants to lose weight she will do so on her own accord and for her own benefit rather than habouring the belief that losing weight will be the only way for her to 'catch men'.

queensmith:

lol- no julies just spoilt! But yes she does need councilling

I disagree on the ola point though, I dont think her mum should start feeding her nonsense about how she needs to lose weight to date, Overweight people date too! Thats exactly what causes 'julie type' insecurities in a woman. If she wants to lose weight she will do so on her own accord and for her own benefit rather than habouring the belief that losing weight will be the only way for her to 'catch men'.

Overweight people date too but they do struggle to find date as they have a limited pool to select from especially when they are obese which Ola is. They are dating means little since their choice is limited (extremely in the case of obese people) and they have to compromise their desires to get most dates. Choice and options is one of the core ingredients of happiness.

Please lets not pretend being overweight is not a problem for self-esteem and desirability. There is a very high probability that little girl will be unhappy, self-concious and low self-esteemed in the future. Almost all women desire to be seen as one of the most beautiful things on Earth and being obese will reduce to close to zero the proportion of people that will see a girl like that.

Sagamite:

Overweight people date too but they do struggle to find date as they have a limited pool to select from especially when they are obese which Ola is. They are dating means little since their choice is limited (extremely in the case of obese people) and they have to compromise their desires to get most dates. Choice and options is one of the core ingredients of happiness.

Please lets not pretend being overweight is not a problem for self-esteem and desirability. There is a very high probability that little girl will be unhappy, self-concious and low self-esteemed in the future.

An overweight girl will only struggle when her esteem is in the way, Obese people date, get married and have children. Those that do not, have more problems with their confidence and show that when relating to people.
The limited pool to select story will apply to every woman who defaults in areas of conventionally accepted soo called 'beauty'. And with men that chose women this way I will say she's not missing much!
Choice and options in dating numerous men? maybe for guys but not for women, most women dont want to date 500 dudes for anything! Its not a competition where we sit down and compare the numbers of men we dated every wek!

Being overweight is a bigger problem when accompanied with having low self esteem, her family have done well not to make her self concious over her appearance. Low self esteem doesnt hit you when your 25 its a part of you from your youth, if shes fine now she'll be fine later! Her probability is no higher than any other girl her age!
Nobody is pretending she's not overweight, shes not gonna be britains next top model but that doesnt mean she wont be happy!

Sagamite:

Overweight people date too but they do struggle to find date as they have a limited pool to select from especially when they are obese which Ola is. They are dating means little since their choice is limited (extremely in the case of obese people) and they have to compromise their desires to get most dates. Choice and options is one of the core ingredients of happiness.

Please lets not pretend being overweight is not a problem for self-esteem and desirability. There is a very high probability that little girl will be unhappy, self-concious and low self-esteemed in the future. Almost all women desire to be seen as one of the most beautiful things on Earth and being obese will reduce to close to zero the proportion of people that will see a girl like that.

very true, thats why i said her mum needs to encourage her to lose weight, in the west image is everything especially for young people, if you are not attractive, trendy, wear fashionable clothes and are of a reasonable shape and size (especially if you are a girl)  - you end up being bullied and isolated - that is the reality - there is very little parents can do to change that aside from homeschooling your kids and keeping them isolated - that in turn leads to the children becoming outsiders who will find it impossible to fit in with other kids, its better to raise  children with an awareness of these factors as opposed to pretending these harsh realities don't exist.

cap28:

very true, thats why i said her mum needs to encourage her to lose weight, in the west image is everything especially for young people, if you are not attractive, trendy, wear fashionable clothes and are of a reasonable shape and size (especially if you are a girl)  - you end up being bullied and isolated - that is the reality - there is very little parents can do to change that aside from homeschooling your kids and keeping them isolated - that in turn leads to the children becoming outsiders who will find it impossible to fit in with other kids, its better to raise  children with an awareness of these factors as opposed to pretending these harsh realities don't exist. 

What are you saying? the western worlds obsession with image is extremely unhealthy! its not even accompanied with isolation, its accompanied with death, sickness, psychological trauma and self harm. An those are what people do to themselves!

The best thing a parent can do for his/her child is to make sure however they look they have confidence in themselves and dont become unhealthily obsessed like those around them! you end up with a healthy happy child! to me thats much more important than having a child that wants to wear designer clothes, wear make up, starve herself or have plastic surgery because of the crazy world around her! You have a daughter, will you prefer she spends her time obsessing over her image (and never being satisfied with it) or being happy and enjoying her youth?

queensmith:

An overweight girl will only struggle when her esteem is in the way, Obese people date, get married and have children. Those that do not, have more problems with their confidence and show that when relating to people.

Yes, obese are more likely to struggle with getting and keeping relationships in the prevalent society we have irrespective of self-esteem. Don't say they only struggle because of self-esteem. They struggle because of obesity, self-esteem might exacerbate it.

Many obese people only get married after they severely compromise on their own desires as the most men they fancy do not fancy them, most likely, more than they would have had to if they were not obese.

queensmith:

The limited pool to select story will apply to every woman who defaults in areas of conventionally accepted soo called 'beauty'. And with men that chose women this way I will say she's not missing much!

Obese women are more likely to default in areas of conventional beauty than non-obese women and MAJORITY of men choose women this way (conventional beauty) so obese person's pool will be far smaller. Please lets not pretend being obese is not a problem.

She is missing out as she is very likely to want to be desirable and not achieving it can lead to unhappiness. FACT!

queensmith:

Choice and options in dating numerous men? maybe for guys but not for women, most women dont want to date 500 dudes for anything! Its not a competition where we sit down and compare the numbers of men we dated every wek!

I am not talking of dating numerous men, I am talking of having options of numerous men to select from or finding it easy to attract the ones she is attracted to. If she is obese, that ability is HEAVILY diminished and severe compromise and submission are likely to become the requirement before the can fulfil the innate desire of most women: EXCLUSIVE COMPANIONSHIP.

queensmith:

Being overweight is a bigger problem when accompanied with having low self esteem, her family have done well not to make her self concious over her appearance. Low self esteem doesnt hit you when your 25 its a part of you from your youth, if shes fine now she'll be fine later! Her probability is no higher than any other girl her age!
Nobody is pretending she's not overweight, shes not gonna be britains next top model but that doesnt mean she wont be happy!

What do you mean by her probability is no higher than any other girl her age? In attraction or low self-esteem?

You think a woman like Gabourey Sidibe or even Monique is more confident/happier than a girl like Keri Hilson (not overlooking Keri's own insecurities)?

queensmith:

What are you saying? the western worlds obsession with image is extremely unhealthy! its not even accompanied with isolation, its accompanied with death, sickness, psychological trauma and self harm. An those are what people do to themselves!

Whether it is unhealthy or not is inconsequential. It is there and has an impact on people's lives.

queensmith:

The best thing a parent can do for his/her child is to make sure however they look they have confidence in themselves and dont become unhealthily obsessed like those around them! you end up with a healthy happy child! to me thats much more important than having a child that wants to wear designer clothes, wear make up, starve herself or have plastic surgery because of the crazy world around her! You have a daughter, will you prefer she spends her time obsessing over her image (and never being satisfied with it) or being happy and enjoying her youth?

How much confidence is she likely to retain if when she goes to parties with her friends, all the boys want to chat or dance with her friends but don't want to be seen with her in "that way" because they have a rep to keep?

What much of happiness will she be able to retain when almost all the boys she fancies prefer one or the other of her slim friends?

What much of self-esteem can she retain when she cannot dress as nicely and sexily as she desires because fashion designers do not cater for her body shape?

How much self-conciousness can she avoid if people consistently say to other girls next to her that they are beautiful or ogle them but she seems not to exist to deserve such comments or actions?