AdeeT:
Abuse and curse me all you wished, the did is already done, the one I am not proud of, and never wished for to happen. I took all the blame, and only wanted a best idea/advice to safe landing.

My mind is pushing me towards visiting her to relate with her all that has happened. And again, another mind is telling me that all would be lost afterwards. I don't want to loose her, she's already an integral part of my life.

How best can I confront her without loosing her?

What do u aim to achieve by your confession? Earn her trust or cause her pain?
You will end up having her shattered and ruined the relationship.
We all sometimes do things we aren't proud once in a life but what matters is how we manage the aftermath of such events.
Allow yourself some time and the guilt we go.
Go run some test after 3months to ensure u ain't infected, while u pray she doesn't take in.
Keep this a secret and abstain from such behaviour.

Are you a Christian?

kowema:
He said he Fell into her seduction!.
So now we should blame her?.

Oga man up and take responsibility for your shit!.

You didn't feel guilty all the while you guys had several rendezvous, it's when she left back to base that your guilt resumed work, Nonsense!!!!.

When she started the Art of seduction as you claimed, why didn't you tell your girlfriend?, Na when you don belleful nai your guilt trigger.

Abi you are feeling like a this cus the girl isn't the one feeling horrible, if she was, you would have been spreading ur shoulder, feeling like conqueror, would have gone back to ur babe and then typical she will forgive you and the other person becomes the villain.

Please go and confess to your loving girlfriend and I hope she dumps ur cheating ass. Seduced you indeed!

Best comment ever!

Cutehector:
i've been doing well, how about you? Where do you base now

let's chat via WhatsApp

[color=#000099][/color]I will advice u tell your girl because soon or later she will get to know. To free yourself and put her friend to shame, tell your woman. With that you are building your trust. She may even use that to blackmail you if you don't let her know now.

mirexxx:
let's chat via WhatsApp

alright then.. My number is on my profile..

People think by showing fake pity they are helping someone. OP should take ownership and man up. The test was given and you failed woefully.What makes you think your fiancée does not know about it already and if the friend does not tell her and you kept it a secret, that means you have a black mamba around your woman all the time which could strike at anytime. If you want to separate her from your fiancée what excuse will you give? Try and be hard on yourself OP and you will see how your life will improve. Don't listen to all these serial cheats trying to make this a minor issue. Let me be Frank with you, its like killing a human for the first time, subsequent murder won't have the same effect anymore. The best is not to cross the bridge but you can make it back and not cross it anymore. Thats where taking ownership comes in. Whatever the girl did to seduce you does not matter as you cannot control the way people behave. You only have control over yourself and and I'm saying it for the umpteenth time 'take ownership' of your actions and life. Good luck.

bestabigaelever:
You had sex several times with the best friend of the person you claimed you love
You are a plaque, please leave that innocent girl alone and go for medical check up pls
But since u need advice, here is my own
Send a break up message, telling her how u are bad and foolish person, that you don't deserve her
If she calls back, answer the phone crying....dont day anything yet
After she persuade you, confessed what u did
If she forgive ND take you back, then go and sin no more

Ahhh! what if he doesn't know how to cry?

Shugargal:
Plz his gal friend doesn't need to be spanked, what she's done is what I can actually do but the problem,personal me I just have and believe that guys must always make a move so to avoid it I left my 1bedroom flat for him,because I love my bestie and wouldn't want anything to hurt her.the gal friend did that base on trust,i just wanna believe that.

This trust thing funny sha...trust is when u knw ur bf has a two or three bedroom flat and there is ample room in the house for everybody to be comfortable. I once told my gf to stay with my bestfriend when she was always getting home very late from work,but that was cos i knew there was enof room in his house for everybody to mind their business,but with that my gf outrightly rejected the offer.The fact remains,one room one man one woman and the host of hell in between,dont ever give the devil a room to operate. Even her parents would blame her for making that kind of suggestion..lets be real here,this is not a novel,this is REAL LIFE!!!

Two prayer points for you. 1) Pray that your fiancee and her friend did not arrange to test your fidelity. 2) Pray that your fiancee's friend does not get pregnant for you.

AdeeT:


I've betrayed her trust, I have really hurt her, I wish that I could undo all I've done. But it's too late, and I'm reek of guilt, it's all over me.

I just cheated on a beautiful lady that has stayed with me through thick and thin for years, a wonderful soul that anyone would dream to have. Cheating might be a common thing, but the moment you cheat on a pure soul, an innocent woman that gives you all, WITH HER BEST FRIEND, then it's beyond cheating.

I am charming, good looking working class guy, guys and girls easily comment how good looking I am, my fiancee is so proud of me, and my achievements that she easily shows me off at the slightest opportunity. She attended the same Uni with her friend, and ever since then, they've been a very good friend. They even served at the same place(worked out), to show you how close they her.

Now my fiancee works in the southern Nigeria, we planned to seal things up next year, and live together here in Abuja. Her friend came for a job interview here, and my woman advised that she rather stay with me for the period instead of her spending a lot on hotel accommodations since I live alone in a bedroom flat. I obliged, and she came down here, little did I know that things would get messy. Long story cut short, I fell in to her seduction the second night of her staying after some series of events. We ended up having sex couples of time before she left. I feel terrible now, though she felt nothing, I can't even flow well with my woman on phone again, guilt is all over me. I don't know how I will stand her whenever we meet. Of all girls in the world, she's the least anyone would want to cheat on.

I'm thinking of telling her. Mind you guys, I'm not a weakling, I've never been one. Before I met her some 3 years back, I was on the other end of life. She changed a lot for good for me, and helped stop many bad things, as well as starting several good ones. I don't know what her reaction would be after telling her. Her friend still communicates with her as if nothing happened.

I'm in pain guys. A serious one. I need advices.

It's glaring you do love your woman, you need to really prove this (to yourself now) by hurting her with the truth than being unjust to her (by keeping her in the dark) and to your conscience.

I will suggest you type two messages; (1) letting the friend know the regret you felt and how painful it was to you (2) confessional one, stating in summary how and what happened. Send the first to the friend and the second to your fiancee. Note: Both must be sent at the same time

The expected outcomes are as follow;
A)Which ever way, it coming out now or later (which will eventually happen, either from you or the friend), your fiancee will be heartbroken.
B)She will loose her friend, and "may" loose you too (but if she truly loves you as you think, she might forgive you, she has her fault in this too). Either way it happens, you both don't deserve to be in her (your fiancee) life.
C)Your conscience will be true to you and her.

The final onus still rest on you. Let this event be the most responsible decision you will ever make. I wish you the best!

Doing that shit with her best friend is really big deal. Even if you try to handle it now, in years time you will break.

I would say you help your girl in whatever way you can and help her build her career. Stop having sex with her. Let her know she's one of a kind and you really appreciate all her efforts in the 3years you have spent together.

After you have done that, tell her the shit you did and move on with life. Don't try to convince her to forgive you. You messed up big time and you don't deserve her. If she's that kind and loving, she's still going to want you but this time, the ball might not all be in your court as she will always use this as a leverage.

Take responsibility for the mess you caused yourself.

Don't tell her, she might have cheated and not tell you also

DonDemu:
What a judgemental fool you are...mtcheww

You are a bigger fool, mistake only happen once
You are very stupid

GindoX:



Ahhh! what if he doesn't know how to cry?

He must learn o
He is in pain remember

ugofulfilled:


Nicely put. I guess you're one of the saints who never sinned before. you are so critical and judgemental. That's not a way to go. People like you do worst things behind the scene. You call a human like you a plague because he erred? I'm not justifying the young man's profligacy but let him who is without sin be the first to cast a stone. No gender is uniquely immuned from mistakes or predisposed to unfaithfulness so to say. it's predominantly a matter of socio-cultural environments. Check your attitude, might be all that you need to fix. Thank you and have a great day.

Did u read the part where he had sex several times, that's not a mistake
I insist on that
That was pure wickedness
Have a great day too

AdeeT:


I've betrayed her trust, I have really hurt her, I wish that I could undo all I've done. But it's too late, and I'm reek of guilt, it's all over me.

I just cheated on a beautiful lady that has stayed with me through thick and thin for years, a wonderful soul that anyone would dream to have. Cheating might be a common thing, but the moment you cheat on a pure soul, an innocent woman that gives you all, WITH HER BEST FRIEND, then it's beyond cheating.

I am charming, good looking working class guy, guys and girls easily comment how good looking I am, my fiancee is so proud of me, and my achievements that she easily shows me off at the slightest opportunity. She attended the same Uni with her friend, and ever since then, they've been a very good friend. They even served at the same place(worked out), to show you how close they her.

Now my fiancee works in the southern Nigeria, we planned to seal things up next year, and live together here in Abuja. Her friend came for a job interview here, and my woman advised that she rather stay with me for the period instead of her spending a lot on hotel accommodations since I live alone in a bedroom flat. I obliged, and she came down here, little did I know that things would get messy. Long story cut short, I fell in to her seduction the second night of her staying after some series of events. We ended up having sex couples of time before she left. I feel terrible now, though she felt nothing, I can't even flow well with my woman on phone again, guilt is all over me. I don't know how I will stand her whenever we meet. Of all girls in the world, she's the least anyone would want to cheat on.

I'm thinking of telling her. Mind you guys, I'm not a weakling, I've never been one. Before I met her some 3 years back, I was on the other end of life. She changed a lot for good for me, and helped stop many bad things, as well as starting several good ones. I don't know what her reaction would be after telling her. Her friend still communicates with her as if nothing happened.

I'm in pain guys. A serious one. I need advices.

When I say men are dogs, I lie?
Abeg get out for road!
Sha don't infect the innocent girl with disease from your careless lifestyle. As that other lady slept with you without conscience, thats how she would have been sleeping around carelessly too and I'm sure you didn't use protection. Chai!
Useless men everywhere.

AdeeT:


For days I've been so weak bro, I'm so out of thoughts. I really bleeped up, I know.

I actually kept my distance from her, the first day, she slept in the bedroom, while I in the living room. I fell to some cheap plays, and she cornered me. I'm seriously regretting my actions.

This is a girl that have been praying with me(and for me) before I sleep or go to work the next day. I shouldn't have do this to her. It seems that I can't live with the guilt, neither do I wanna loose her.

Her friend is already ignored, both off and on-line.

Na now you wan get sense,guys like you are the reason the term cheap is use for 80% of guys,the word discipline is erased from your dictionary,who knows may be your girl has been bragging about you to her.and she use the opportunity to test you and shame your girl,and you fell so cheaply,cheaper than cheap,did you even go up to 15mins I doubt.now you are crying guilt a body member (d....k)you are suppose to control is rather the one controlling you,stupid cheap dick head.you better sit her down and tell her before her friend hits her with it.shattering her pride,who knows tomorrow it could be your maid (Mr konji na bastard)
When ladies all over the social media stood still for mike of bbn ,guess a guy like you was down with jealousy,but of the truth I tell you men like mike I rare.
Cheap and classless.

Brightgem:
and you believe with all your heart, you have said the right thing? Especially those last lines, you'll just tell someone to leave their friends because they married you and they must obey, friends they might have even known before they met you? Why sounding like every thing is predictable. Friend might be plotting something, breaking trust two times by keeping quiet, when it backfires eh!

You dey mind the deeper life woman, eyan 1900bc

AdeeT:
Thanks to all for trying to help.

I'm just more confused now than ever. I'll keep this to myself till we meet in December, by then, I pray that God will forgive me, and help me keep this that have nurtured for a long time.

I've learnt my lessons now. Again, thank you all.

December is far o. Tell her now, delay is dangerous.

Sanchezmillz:


What you have said is totally different,u left the house for the guy.How will you talk about trust in a one bedroom apartment for christ sake.Please explain. Even when Jesus was tempted, it was not as bad as this one.Morally speaking if this story is true,then his gf should be planked with a stick.Did her friend complain that she dint have money for hotel?

Really, men like you go after there maids all in the name of I can't control myself,a female begs to put up with you and all that can trespass your filthy mind is how to get down with her, of the truth I tell you no female is safe around.
Ladies beware of men like this.
Thumbs up for a man like mike of bbn.

wany:


Really, men like you go after there maids all in the name of I can't control myself,a female begs to put up with you and all that can trespass your filthy mind is how to get down with her, of the truth I tell you no female is safe around.
Ladies beware of men like this.
Thumbs up for a man like mike of bbn.

Mike na Mumu. Anyone would do that if it's their game plan and they have 100 of camera's breaching their privacy.

AdeeT:
Kick me, stab me, slam me, crucify me, I deserved all of them, and more. But remembers, I'm a human, an imperfect, my human side prevails me.

In response to few comments here;

1. I didn't take advantage of her, neither did she took advantage of me, because I'm a grwon up man. It was a mutual thing as a knife wasn't held on my neck to do that. Though she brought up a strange game which I reluctantly agreed to play(no 1 error) and that's the genesis of the whole thing. The act happening more than once is graphical, I wouldn't want to explain that on a public forum. Believe me, it wasn't my fault.

2. My fiancee isn't a dumb or a stupid girl, she was only been considerate as the cost of hotel accommodations for some 4 days around here would be too much for a job seeker, she was only trying to help out, I live alone in a room flat apartment, it's not as if we would be sleeping on a bed together. Even if it was like that, my girl trusted me to a fault. All the years we've been together, she's got no single reason to doubt me on anything. Though I fell, I never taught that this would happened.

3. Our relationship isn't a leech/parasitic one, we are doing fine on our own, she did helped me stop some things at the other end of life, like she showed me what life is truly is. I can't just afford to loose a woman like her in today's world.

Though many woman are secretive in nature, but trust, she is not many woman, she has never hide any part of her life to me. I do check up on her whenever I'm free, and there's no a single time I've got a reason to worry. Like I wrote before, she is a pure soul, the type you don't just meet everyday. I've seen many ladies before her, even in my undergrad years, so I fighting to keep her means a lot to me.

4. If I'm arrogant, I'm sorry, I didn't intend to be. And in all honesty, I'm not an arrogant being. That was just a mere description of my self, which I thought that it wasn't bad.

Thanks to everyone for your wonderful advice, and for righting my wrongs. I've decided not to tell her till we tied the knot. The friend has alreadu messaged me saying she's sorry for all that happened, that it shouldn't be her.

She already blamed herself in her series of messages, I'll keep that as a defense for future. Again, I'm so sorry, and thank you all.

unknown to you,you are a very selfish and self centred person, from your response so far,it is only the effect your action is going to have on you that is priority, how you can eat your cake and have it back.Very cruel to take the decision of telling her after you have tied the knot.Everything revolves around you.I love my fiancée,I lovey fiancée up and down yet you couldn't put it into action.You don't love that lady but yourself and the advantage she's gonna be to you.Mark my words since you have decided not to man up and take full responsibility for your actions now which might even make her to reconsider you,by the time she gets to know after deceiving her to tie the knots,she will forever hate you and that Jezebel she calls her bestie,but the hate will be more on you and she will carry that hate till eternity even if she can't divorce you again. She will feel worthless, stupid and foolish before you and the Jezebel and the taught of how you two played,deceive and betrayed her will never leave her memory. You thought you are remorseful and can never happen again?but I put it to you that it will happen again when the opportunity comes, there's this passion that accompanies cheating with besties that you can't resist (devilish passion), you can only boast now because another
opportunity hasn't come yet.There's a way you can tell her about everything that happened and after she vex finish, she will come back to you but you are not smart.I just pity your fiancée.

AdeeT:
Abuse and curse me all you wished, the did is already done, the one I am not proud of, and never wished for to happen. I took all the blame, and only wanted a best idea/advice to safe landing.

My mind is pushing me towards visiting her to relate with her all that has happened. And again, another mind is telling me that all would be lost afterwards. I don't want to loose her, she's already an integral part of my life.

How best can I confront her without loosing her?

I'm not one of those that come here to judge people like many worse folks on here are doing. you already see how toxic and pathetic some of them are with their bitter and sinister comments. they come online to assume judges over someone that truly needed an advice on way forward after his flaws found him, but no, you can't get that from an hypocritical lots from here. so turn a blind eye and don't reply bitter mentions, it only fuels their toxicity.

Back to you, of a truth you messed up, and must take responsibility. no one is above mistake, and one of the most untameable errors has to do with seduction, or sexual related mistakes in general. Even God's holy word never asked us to fight it, instead it says flee from it, because He knows our canal flesh can't stand it.

you have to man up and open yourself with all sincerity to your girl. Go find her and tell her what you've done. truth is, if you don't she will eventually know one way or the other, but finding out another way can be disastrous for you. Safe yourself the sanity of your mind and live with whatever consequences that comes out, if she calls it a quit, accept it, and if she forgives you, bravo. losing a good person can be emotionally wrecking, but life must go on. At least, you have sanity of your mind. You must continue to work on yourself to be better than your mistakes as time goes on.

I wish you luck....

PS: please don't hid the advice of those telling you to leave certain things unsaid. Nemesis has a way of catching up.

Donjazzy12:

Be quiet! You know it is the truth! Lesbians a very where!

Lolz! Look in the mirror and say to yourself. I'm a serious joker.

AdeeT:


I've betrayed her trust, I have really hurt her, I wish that I could undo all I've done. But it's too late, and I'm reek of guilt, it's all over me.

I just cheated on a beautiful lady that has stayed with me through thick and thin for years, a wonderful soul that anyone would dream to have. Cheating might be a common thing, but the moment you cheat on a pure soul, an innocent woman that gives you all, WITH HER BEST FRIEND, then it's beyond cheating.

I am charming, good looking working class guy, guys and girls easily comment how good looking I am, my fiancee is so proud of me, and my achievements that she easily shows me off at the slightest opportunity. She attended the same Uni with her friend, and ever since then, they've been a very good friend. They even served at the same place(worked out), to show you how close they her.

Now my fiancee works in the southern Nigeria, we planned to seal things up next year, and live together here in Abuja. Her friend came for a job interview here, and my woman advised that she rather stay with me for the period instead of her spending a lot on hotel accommodations since I live alone in a bedroom flat. I obliged, and she came down here, little did I know that things would get messy. Long story cut short, I fell in to her seduction the second night of her staying after some series of events. We ended up having sex couples of time before she left. I feel terrible now, though she felt nothing, I can't even flow well with my woman on phone again, guilt is all over me. I don't know how I will stand her whenever we meet. Of all girls in the world, she's the least anyone would want to cheat on.

I'm thinking of telling her. Mind you guys, I'm not a weakling, I've never been one. Before I met her some 3 years back, I was on the other end of life. She changed a lot for good for me, and helped stop many bad things, as well as starting several good ones. I don't know what her reaction would be after telling her. Her friend still communicates with her as if nothing happened.

I'm in pain guys. A serious one. I need advices.

Dude, inasmuch as i'd like to pity you and agree with you that you are remorseful, i still feel that you dont deserve any pity and you are only here to seek for fake sympathy. You come across like someone who wants to eat his cake and still have it at the same time. You complimented your looks like a man who is irrestitible to anyone, especially ladies. To me, that is pride. You said your woman changed many bad things for you, i guess one of the past bad things was being a womanizer who sees sex with anything in skirt as your right based on your charms and looks. Great! But have you truly changed? I'd say no! The old habit rose again when your bae's friend came visiting. Let me help you to consider some things which of course, would make it easier for you to know that you dont have any excuse. Your bae asked you to accommodate her bestfriend in your house, and you agreed to the term because you already knew what you would achieve from that. Okay, your bae said she didnt want her friend to spend much money on hotels. Let me ask, how much is hotel fee in abj that was too much for your bae's friend to raise? Couldn't ur bae give her the money instead in case her friend was broke? how come both of them were broke at the same time? or should i say they were both stingy or frugal?okay, if money couldnt come from them both, what of you? why didnt you sponsor your friend's hotel fee ? What if you dont live in abj? Wouldnt she've found her way around?
Then you accepted the request wholeheartedly because you wanted to please your bae? And you knew that you live alone. I have a feeling that u must have been eyeing her friend for so long and saw her coming to ur house as an opportunity to establish ur fantasy. With your story, i have a feeling that your bae and her friend set you up and you fell into the trap. You said her friend is not remorseful. Why would she when she had placed a bet on u and had won the bet from her friend. Both must have discussed about u and she must have told ur bae that handsome guys with money are randy and hardly stay faithful to one girl. Ur bae must have disbelieved her, then a bet was drawn to see who was right between them. Oga, u don fail their test. Be ready for the consequence. Her friend has proved herself right. Sorry to say my dear, you are a WEALKING. Like someone said, when she started the seduction, why didnt you send her out of ur house, or leave d house for her? Or call her friend to report her? Why did u play along with
her so-called game as u called it until it landed both of u in bed? Ok, agreed, u unintentionally fell for her the first time, but why over and over again? Where was ur conscience when d romp became rampant during her stay? Why is ur conscience pricking u now? U dont have any excuse. U planned it all along in ur heart and u fell for the bait. No need to form repentant here. Let me break it to u mister, there is a high probability that as we speak, ur bae's friend must have told her everything u both did. Go and open up to ur bae now. If u are wise, forget about the relationship because even if bae forgives u, she can never trust u again. She may forgive and accept u back just to punish u big time afterwards. She will make ur life a living hell. So tell her and leave her alone. U dont deserve her type. We cant even be sure that if u have d same opportunity again to bang her friend, u wouldnt take it. Once bleeped can never be unfucked. Once is a mistake but twice is deliberate. Both women would deal with u. Confess to ur woman and let her go. U have messed up big time becos u cant control ur libido.u just want to sleep with both friends. Ur type hardly changes. Sorry if i sound judgmental but in reality, you had all the options to avoid fucking up and betraying ur woman but u misused them all because your libido is your controller. Did u even use condoms with her? What if she gets pregnant for you? I hope you learn ur lesson next time u meet another wonderful woman like ur bae. It's painful that good ladies are most times unlucky to meet bad guys.

You do not deserve that woman. You are a goat, and i pray a beautiful soul meets someone better.

Freehuman:


Mike na Mumu. Anyone would do that if it's their game plan and they have 100 of camera's breaching their privacy.

Really,was there no camere when miracle had it with Nina,how about bambam case,bisola and thin tall tony et el,need I mention more.cheap and classless.

Bros na mini flat o no 2 bedroom !
Nna na wa - which kind nonsense be this ??

I don't regret having no female friends..
But op you really fvcked up,well i advise you tell her because she will still know one way or another trust me,these things(betrayal)have a way of revealing itself.

midnighter:
How can somebody use her own mouth to urge their dude and girlfriend stay together...in a self-contained...and she wont even be there to attend to her friend...

Well, couldnt be me sha..crazy..

Maybe she collaborated with the friend to test you and see if you would fall

I thought as much, the guy should get ready for season 2

bestabigaelever:

Did u read the part where he had sex several times, that's not a mistake
I insist on that
That was pure wickedness now
Have a great day too

That he had sex severally isn't enough reason for you to call him a plague. Think deeply on that word. Or have you encountered this guy? Do you know him? You sound like you know him well enough to label him a plague. Have a great Monday Bestabigaelever.