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No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? - Family (5) - Nairaland

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Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by benheaven(m): 1:31am On Mar 21, 2020
If you enter a room through the window, you should jump out through the window too. Bit if you stole a bed or TV set in the process, you should report yourself. Meaning that if you got children, you can go to court based on their welfare. Thanks for stealing.
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by benheaven(m): 1:34am On Mar 21, 2020
If you enter a room through the window, you should jump out through the window too. But if you stole a bed or TV set in the process, you should report yourself to be allowed to pass through the door. Meaning that if you got children, you can go to court based on their welfare. Thanks for stealing.

2 Likes

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by McTobe(m): 1:57am On Mar 21, 2020
Do a little research, use google map and check the location of US Embassy, then check for hotels that are within 5-6kilometers from the embassy. I am sure you will see. Then check the hotels individually for their room reservations and rate. Good luck to your Granny . NB: I just did the check before suggesting it.
Summer65:
Please I need names of 5 affordable,shortest drive, hotel to USA embassy Lagos ,as granny interview date is at the door. (next month )
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No answer to my question since yesterday this site is depreciating Oo .This question was asked on the appropriate forum no better results... I need answer now
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by googi: 1:59am On Mar 21, 2020
This discussion is scary.

A woman in a voluntary relationship with a man even without children should have some protection. This is the basis of common law relationship.

If you think a woman is not covered because this is Nigeria, you have not seen assertive lady.

But it goes both ways, a poor man will fight you for his "Investment" with you.

The whole discussion is a warning to ladies because they always get the tiny end of the stick.

3 Likes

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by trutht828: 2:00am On Mar 21, 2020
yvelchstores:
Any one who didn't marry with the approval and blessing of the woman's father is not married. If the father is late, who ever that is next in line of authority must give her away to the man. If this is not the case, then the man stole the woman.

What if the woman is the one that tried tying the man down with pregnancy when the guy isn't ready for marriage?

Your blind-by-default feminine perspective couldn't see that possibility, right!
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by McTobe(m): 2:07am On Mar 21, 2020
Summer65:
Please I need names of 5 affordable,shortest drive, hotel to USA embassy Lagos ,as granny interview date is at the door. (next month )
(Modify) (Quote) (Report) (Share)

No answer to my question since yesterday this site is depreciating Oo .This question was asked on the appropriate forum no better results... I need answer now

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Badgers14: 2:07am On Mar 21, 2020
Remijuice:
Please Forgive my Grammar.

A man and a woman living together as husband and wife with kid(s) but are not legally Married. That is, no Traditional or Court Wedding.

If one of them decides not interested in the Union, should he/she go to court before they are Separated?

Modified: If there is no Divorce Proceedings, what happens to the kids?

They could just pack their bags and goo..

Easy peasy!!
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by dashing07(m): 2:12am On Mar 21, 2020
No divorce by going to shrine...
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Dizzyrascal(m): 2:31am On Mar 21, 2020
AuroraB:
Stop this! The woman's got stolen because she's a loaf of bread, a purse or something lipsrsealed
Isn't this very out of place?
you can't argue with facts
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Mycommand: 2:31am On Mar 21, 2020
Assuming you are referencing the way it is done in most western countries! When there is no legal document establishing marriage, there is nothing to dissolve. On the other hand, if one is to answer the question on the welfare of children, which the inquirer did talked about and for the clarity of others who commented on what to do with children! One, would be to find out if a father signed a government birth certificate affirming that he is the father of a child or children born in that relationship, if this is the case, the man is liable to providing financial support for the upkeep of the child or children as the case may be. Another, would be to pursue a "DNA" test to establish paternity if the man is challenging the need to provide financial support to the child or children born in the relationship or simply just denying fatherhood. If the man consent to a "DNA" test and paternity is established in 99.9% then he is liable for the financial support of the child or children. If paternity exonerates the alleged biological father of a child or any of the children, the man is not legally obligated to provide financial support. Case closed! Just my input!

keepingmum:
If you were not married traditionally, religiously or legally then u cant seek redress from the customary court, church or divorce court.

If you didnt think the court, church/mosque or customs important enough to seek their approval for your cohabitation you cant go to them for redress when things fall apart

If your cohabitation produced children, go to your state family services or social welfare and they will draw up a financial support plan in place as well as visitation and custody agreement for both parties.

1 Like

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by adidaprima(m): 2:36am On Mar 21, 2020
This is a very serious blunder you want to commit !

Because kids have emerged you cannot go your separate ways. If there were no kids then it would have been much easier walking out.

If you leave your kids with him who will take care of them ?

Will the man you want to get married love the idea of harbouring another man's kids in his house ?

Will your mind be at peace if your kids are not with you?

Pray to God for forgiveness and pray fervently for divine wisdom to avoid mistakes several persons have made that turn kids into menace to society!
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Xisnin(m): 2:39am On Mar 21, 2020
UnknownQueen:

I'm presently going thru this...

We are married.... Registry, church traditional..

He wants me to pack and leave his house before or on March ending...

He said I can always come to check the kids, girl 5 years, boy 1 year 3 months.

He didn't talk about assets sharing.

He has a landed property and started work on it but not yet completed yet.
I invested almost 500k into the laundry business he has.... Bought Gen, geepee tank washing machine.... Irons, shop rent etc.

But he is asking me to leave just like that... If not he will cause a scene....

How do I go about this?

Leave first for your own safety, then get a lawyer.
You may have a big advantage depending on the state you live in.

1 Like

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Xisnin(m): 2:42am On Mar 21, 2020
Remijuice:
Please Forgive my Grammar.

A man and a woman living together as husband and wife with kid(s) but are not legally Married. That is, no Traditional or Court Wedding.

If one of them decides not interested in the Union, should he/she go to court before they are Separated?

Modified: If there is no Divorce Proceedings, what happens to the kids?
You are married in the eyes of the law.
You need a formal court divorce.
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Nobody: 2:49am On Mar 21, 2020
You guys were never married but just fvck mate. Just walk out the same way you walked in.
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by naptu2: 2:52am On Mar 21, 2020
UnknownQueen:

I'm presently going thru this...

We are married.... Registry, church traditional..

He wants me to pack and leave his house before or on March ending...

He said I can always come to check the kids, girl 5 years, boy 1 year 3 months.

He didn't talk about assets sharing.

He has a landed property and started work on it but not yet completed yet.
I invested almost 500k into the laundry business he has.... Bought Gen, geepee tank washing machine.... Irons, shop rent etc.

But he is asking me to leave just like that... If not he will cause a scene....

How do I go about this?


ornicus:


1) you need a lawyer
2) you need evidence that you made those investments.if you have the receipts for the purchases or maybe evidence of transfers
3) you should also be prepared to cause your own scene. this is a time for my craze pass your own.
4) there are NGOs that can push your case
https://www.legit.ng/1116142-agencies-responsible-protection-womens-rights-nigeria.html

i do not remeber the names but Naptu2 does. he is an encylopedia on these things. i have tagged him. hopefully he will drop the contact .

You could try this:

Office of the Public Defender (Lagos State)

Head Office: – 2/8, Iyun Road, Stadium/Barrack Busstop By Funsho Williams Avenue, Surulere, Lagos.

Ikorodu Office: The Combined High/Magistrate Court, Ita-Elewa, Ikorodu Lagos.

Ogba Office: Samuel Ilori Court, Ogba, Agege, Lagos

Epe Office: Ligali Ayorinde Combined Magistrate/High Court Complex, Epe, Lagos

Toll Free: 070 80 60 10 80

Email: opdlagos@yahoo.com;

Opdlagosstate.gov.org;

Facebook opdlagos@facebook.com

Twitter: @opdlagos

Website: opdlagos.org
https://opd.lagosstate.gov.ng/

7 Likes

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Wettoid123: 3:53am On Mar 21, 2020
Yes sir, through customary court!
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Excuzeme: 4:08am On Mar 21, 2020
Remijuice:
Please Forgive my Grammar.

A man and a woman living together as husband and wife with kid(s) but are not legally Married. That is, no Traditional or Court Wedding.

If one of them decides not interested in the Union, should he/she go to court before they are Separated?

Modified: If there is no Divorce Proceedings, what happens to the kids?

It all depends on LOCATION and that is why the Western World always force Nigerian Men emigrating, to produce "Marriage Cert" issued by a Marriage Registry!
And the women are loving it like Mad.

You are "NOT Legally Married" and so do not require a "Legal Separation".

Now, in some,foreign Climes, living together in a relationship akin to marriage, can be construed as marriage!
Secondly, the issue of child support, which is at the root of most divorce in the Western world (they are trying seriously to import this into Nigeria as well), is all about MONEY.
Majority of Women will not want to keep the Children, if they realise the Man wont be paying them any Money as Child Support but most men will gladly take care of their children, without a penny from the Woman.

On your issue, if you live in Nigeria, you dont need to go to any Court to scatter.
But l want you to consider the "children", they are not part of the wahala between husband and Wife and do not deserve to suffer.
If your estrange wife will agree and if you want, either of you can have the kids while the other have rights to pick them up at designated times of the year (for example during school breaks).

I dont support handing over money to an ex-spouse just because the have the kids with them, usually, the money does not serve the purpose for which it was designated and the children still suffer a lot, while the spouse wasting the money on other uselss things, sgifts the blame on the paying partner and even tries to sow hatred between the children and the other partner!
Usually, it is Women that perpetuates this evil.
Try and workout something in the best interest of your kids, to make them happy and ensure that it actually benefits those kids, even if you have to purchase things for them, by yourself (bulk raw food, clothings, shoes, school items, school fees that you pay directly to the school, occassional trips for the kids, etc)

I really dont givs a two fingers about husband/ wife or cohabiting adults, if they decide to go their separate ways
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Excuzeme: 4:20am On Mar 21, 2020
adidaprima:
This is a very serious blunder you want to commit !

Because kids have emerged you cannot go your separate ways. If there were no kids then it would have been much easier walking out.

If you leave your kids with him who will take care of them ?

Will the man you want to get married love the idea of harbouring another man's kids in his house ?

Will your mind be at peace if your kids are not with you?

Pray to God for forgiveness and pray fervently for divine wisdom to avoid mistakes several persons have made that turn kids into menace to society!

Are you saying that a Man cannot take care of his own kids?
Who made the law that the kids belong to the wife, because l see you say "who will take care of your kids"?
What of situations where the wife died, do Man not take care of the kids in her absence?
If the kids have to be with her to put her mind at rest, what about the father of the kids, does he not need his onw mind at rest as well, with his children staying with him?

I am asking all these questions because it appears women are always trying to use the "kids" as a weapon and bargaining chip,once a relationship or marriage goes sour!

BTW, l think women should start keeping reciepts and records of how they contributed financially, in a marriage.
Once there is a problem, they just come up with some large figures and fathom claim of what they contribute, WITHOUT ANY PROOF OR EVIDENCE AND EXPECT TO BE BELIEVED AND THAT CLAIM MADE VALID! shocked shocked

Same thing is happening with Rape charges!
Any woman just wakes up one day and make a rape claim of 30years ago and they expect the courts to "believe their word of mouth" and ruin a man's life!
If you are raped, ensure you report and get a medical to that effect. In this modern times, there is no excuse to claim you did not report the rape and did not get a medical that would prove a semen DNA.
Men are being systematicallly persecuted by women just because on the average, they are more resilient, more successful and more upwardly mobile

***If you dont like my post, dont quote me and start frothing in the mouth like someone infected with Corona Virus, just waka-pass***

2 Likes

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Rhymer2020(m): 4:32am On Mar 21, 2020
1030:
The court can only come in when there is a legal document to show that both parties were married and in this case none exist.

As for the children welfare there is no clear guide on how this should be handle since no marriage exist here.

the case can easily be treated by police, (Welfare department) without even involving the law court
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by LegalOpinion: 4:46am On Mar 21, 2020
yvelchstores:
Any one who didn't marry with the approval and blessing of the woman's father is not married. If the father is late, who ever that is next in line of authority must give her away to the man. If this is not the case, then the man stole the woman.

So a woman can be stolen?

1 Like

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Mordecai(m): 5:12am On Mar 21, 2020
Plead:



You’re a lost cause.

You are lost, mate.
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by LeanonGOD(m): 5:28am On Mar 21, 2020
ABEG don't kill me with laugh - very funny.
gouken2:
The way u entered into the union without involving anyone is the same way u can leave without involving anyone and trust me, no one will notice.
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by CaptainFM1: 5:31am On Mar 21, 2020
Remijuice:

Ok
I think because of the welfare of the kids the Court now comes in


Yeah Remi, but its better you both stay together and care for the kids. Perhaps, you may find reasons to get married in future.

1 Like

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Snakedoctor1: 5:36am On Mar 21, 2020
Remijuice:
Please Forgive my Grammar.

A man and a woman living together as husband and wife with kid(s) but are not legally Married. That is, no Traditional or Court Wedding.

If one of them decides not interested in the Union, should he/she go to court before they are Separated?

Modified: If there is no Divorce Proceedings, what happens to the kids?
First you didnt say whether the kids are minors or otherwise. They are simply illegitimate under law and could only be legitimised by a subsequent marriage of the parents. The parent can go separate ways without legal tussle. If the children have attained majority age, ie 18 and above, they can chose who to go with. If they are below, the woman will reasonably have custody except there are vitiating elements that will prove her Inappropriate. The customary and magistrates courts can entertain such cases of custody of illegitimate children but those are still what they will determine.
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by wirinet(m): 5:43am On Mar 21, 2020
yvelchstores:
Any one who didn't marry with the approval and blessing of the woman's father is not married. If the father is late, who ever that is next in line of authority must give her away to the man. If this is not the case, then the man stole the woman.
We are discussing a legal issues and you are bringing in a moral or traditional issue. Even if it was complete strangers that signed the marriage certificate as witnesses, the marriage is legally binding. The courts will recognise it as a legal marriage and accord all parties the rights of a legal marriage.

1 Like

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by larryking540: 5:43am On Mar 21, 2020
NobleAngell:
And what about the man involved? What is he? Expensive?

Some people just day talk because other person's day talk
Don't mind him ,,it doesn't matter wat favour the next person might not favour you ,..I have seen boyfriend and girlfriend all the way from University and after graduation Belle enter for 8 years no marriage na later the guy wedd the babe ,,,


So this ignorant people or ladies looking for a wedding ring by all means thereby entering one chance marriage and later come on line and start complaining
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Snakedoctor1: 5:44am On Mar 21, 2020
Xisnin:

You are married in the eyes of the law.
You need a formal court divorce.
which law. There is presumption of cohabitation which works in times of civil liabilities of either party. This is not marriage under law.
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Nobody: 5:51am On Mar 21, 2020
Remijuice:
Please Forgive my Grammar.

A man and a woman living together as husband and wife with kid(s) but are not legally Married. That is, no Traditional or Court Wedding.

If one of them decides not interested in the Union, should he/she go to court before they are Separated?

Modified: If there is no Divorce Proceedings, what happens to the kids?

You only use legal to sue legal... legal cannot sue illegal
Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by ejimatic: 5:51am On Mar 21, 2020
Remijuice:
Please Forgive my Grammar.

A man and a woman living together as husband and wife with kid(s) but are not legally Married. That is, no Traditional or Court Wedding.

If one of them decides not interested in the Union, should he/she go to court before they are Separated?

Modified: If there is no Divorce Proceedings, what happens to the kids?
. There is no marriage between you.Either of you can pack out when you like.It is sad that that is the life many Nigerians are living now.As to the custody of the children if they are between 8and 9 they are old enough to be with their father but the wife should have access to them too.If they are less than that it is better to stay with their mother till they become 8or9. ....If you live with a man or woman without marriage in any form you are just wasting your time since their is no legal union between both of you.
Additionally if you stay with a man without marriage and have children with him and he contracts marriage with another lady in future that new Lady is his wife legally but you the first woman are just a baby factory for him.....

1 Like

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by ejimatic: 6:02am On Mar 21, 2020
googi:
This discussion is scary.

A woman in a voluntary relationship with a man even without children should have some protection. This is the basis of common law relationship.

If you think a woman is not covered because this is Nigeria, you have not seen assertive lady.

But it goes both ways, a poor man will fight you for his "Investment" with you.

The whole discussion is a warning to ladies because they always get the tiny end of the stick.
. It is not scary my brother or sister. The truth is do not go into a man s house without full marriage traditionajy or statutory marriage.Any Lady who does that is likely to cry later.Regrettably this kind of life is common in Nigeria.Some do introduction and settle down.Introduction is not marriage at all.Please ladies and men should do what is right for their protection.

1 Like

Re: No Court Marriage. Must We Separate By Going Through Divorce In Court? by Nobody: 6:24am On Mar 21, 2020
Most of the marriage dis days is a ruse. There is no commitment at all.both of them will just want to marry on the peripheral foundation. Two weeks after the wedding, marriage don scatter. One of my neighbors is seriously having issues in his marriage. Nah so so fight every day. The lady no dey work. Nah just to dey gossip and beginning to roll her bakazi up and down.

My people, there is no part of our law that made a marriage mandatory. If you can not endure the storms, don't go marry. Remain a celibate like me. I'm an ambassador of celibate..i will continue to preach it

1 Like

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