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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Politics / Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! (14124 Views)
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Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by otokx(m): 1:07pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
Let me try and play 3rd party advocate. First The type of English you speak is a reflection of how good your teachers were at Primary and Secondary education so let us not point fingers at UNIPORT yet. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Nobody: 1:09pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
OUR PROBLEM HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH GRAMMAR. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Natasha2(f): 1:20pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
otokx:wrong wrong wrong wrong . Some people are unteachable even with a good teacher some people cant just learn thats why that boy keeps coming last in class despite the effort of the teacher. In a class not everybody comes first even when taught by the same teacher so you cant just put everything on the teachers head |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by otokx(m): 1:23pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
@Natasha That may be true in secondary school but quite different in primary school. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by debest1(m): 1:23pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
abeg leave the woman alone, nobody is perfect. How many of you scored (A) in english language? |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Nobody: 1:24pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
naijaking1: You are the Bomb! You too much I beg! |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Nobody: 1:38pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
naijaking1:Thanks for this comprehensive insight! |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by saintneo(m): 1:46pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
Ibime, Uniport is at your location you know. IMHO, I think the verboseness of Goodluck and his wife cannot be attributed to Uniport, it is just a personal trait and territorial influence. Let's not hammer this on UNIQUE UNIPORT rather blame it on the incessant use of pidgin English in the Niger-Delta. Most of the people that grew up in the Niger-Delta has this problem of localizing the English language. This can be said to exist in other areas in Nigeria, East (Emeka of BlackBerry Babes), West (Jenifa of Jenifa) and the North (the entire crop of politians from the area). Let it be known that the ability to speak fluently in English improves with geographical mobility; in the sense that the speaker tends to modify his/her communication suit the listener. Finally, no be everybody wey go school been learn wetin them teach am. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by passyjango(m): 1:51pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
She probably got adult education, the type that they use their salary to bribe their way through school. I believe that was also the case for her husband. The fact that she has a degree is a surprise to me because based on her level of articulation; I would have classified her as a junior secondary school dropout. The problem with the First lady is not just that she cannot speak English, but that she does not reason at the level of an educated person. She does not make sense in any language. The first time I heard her read I thought she was teaching in a nursery school, because of the way she reads like she is reciting a poem. That was before the campaign, my fellow widows, and the Umbrella. Her low IQ became apparent when during the campaign she started speaking from her head without prepared speeches. Because, the head was almost empty the only words that were coming were Umbrella, Shildrens, my fellow widows, and other little snippets of information in her brain. The fact that she has not been able to improve on her English and reasoning capacity over the years simply shows that she is intellectually challenged. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by dremoney(m): 1:52pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
1. The Bombers who born them?wasn't it not a woman? They were once a Children now a adult now they are bombing women and children making some children a widow 2. The President was once a Child and the Senators were once a Children 3. A Good Mother takes care of his Children 4. My Heart feels sorry for these Children who havee become Widows by losing their Parents for one reason or another 5. My Husband and Sambo is a good people 6. The people sitting before you here were once a Children 7. Yes we are all happy for the effort,it is not easy to carry second in an international competition like this one - Addressing Press men after Female Under 19 Fifa World Cup Now,she is a target until her miserable life is not funded by our money! |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Nobody: 1:53pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
Remii:Cool!!! |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by klear(f): 2:01pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
dremoney: we better prepare our ears if Jonathan wins & she has 2 address the international community ( because that will surely happen) |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by strangest(m): 2:12pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
WHAT WE NEED IS "ACTION" NOT "WORDS" |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by reindeer: 2:16pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
klear: You had me rolling on the floor. Make una leaf Madam Patience(pronounced . . .Pay. . .Shense) alone o! After all ''NOBODY ABOVE MISTAKE'' |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by strangest(m): 2:18pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
THE INTERNATIONAL COMMUNITIES DONT EVEN RECOGNIZE A DEGREE FROM A NIGERIAN UNIVERSITY, SO ITS NOT JUST PH, NOT FROM THERE TOUGH WHAT WE NEED IS "ACTION" NOT "WORDS" PATIENCE ROCKS |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by babyoy(f): 2:20pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
Instead of castigating her, why don't someone volunteer to teach her |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by EzeUche2(m): 2:21pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
To be honest, we can't have any of these wives speaking though. Seems like Nigerian politicians enjoy going to their villages to find a wife. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Nobody: 2:24pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
GEJ!!! carry go,who wan die make e die.na you we go vote for! |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Ericology(m): 2:25pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
EzeUche_: Ezeuche, u disappoint me, i ve always admired ur doggedness with certain issues here but well, this constant defense of madam GEJ by some nairalanders by reminding us that English aint her mother tongue have started sounding like broken records, I tell u, we all make mistakes but if after several years in primary, sec school, and getting an NCE dat qualifies one as a teacher, then a university degree she still doesnt know when to use a child and children to qualify people, then shes is TOTALLY DUMB, take it or leave it |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by dremoney(m): 2:31pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
Ericology: Bless You, |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Dizzybizzy: 2:33pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
@ topic: |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Dizzybizzy: 2:35pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
strangest:This is not true, |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Ibomade1: 2:39pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
Well, as much as I believe that PDP do not have any tangible agenda for Nigeria. I will try and leave Madame Patience alone in peace. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by ekubear1: 2:41pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
passyjango:Yep. It is pretty much impossible to spend four years at an English-speaking institution and come out talking like an illiterate. That is my own hypothesis at this point. . . her UniPort degrees are fake or purchased. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Ibime(m): 3:00pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
I think I now agree with the President's statement that the current education system is rubbish. The evidence lies in Aso Rock. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by kemisuga(f): 3:07pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
@ Poster - Go find better job do. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Nobody: 3:07pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
eku_bear: naija unis i remeber during nyc at camp - i was reading a novel and some dude was like u never read enough book for school? |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by Nobody: 3:09pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
babyoy:You will not know the value of education until when you need it.let her bear the cross by herself afterall nobody asked her to stay way from school when her mates were busy planning for their future . |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by otukpo(f): 3:18pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
This is not about GEJ's wife or anybody. The fact remains that some graduates including those criticising Dame cannot speak or write good english. Some graduates can write but not speak well while for some, the reverse is the case. Nders should stop over-flogging this english matter. It is the least of our problems as a nation. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by ekubear1: 3:18pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
oyb: Sure, it is the same here too . . . people don't enjoy reading But I'm sure the dude could speak English reasonably well? At least, better than an illiterate? My dad's driver is a drop out from somewhere in Ogbomoso, but is more eloquent than her. |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by damas11111(m): 3:40pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
The issue here is not about her accent. She could have been pardoned on that if it was the ONLY problem. The main problem is her ability to MURDER the English language at any given opportunity. I would like any of her advocates here to tell us, sincerely speaking, if they will be proud to say "that's my first Lady" seeing her on an international channel like CNN murdering English. You may want to read this: Patience Jonathan's Peculiar Grammar Farooq A. Kperogi March 20, 2011 More from this author Follow Farooq A. Kperogi on Facebook Follow Farooq A. Kperogi on Twitter Nigeria’s First Lady “Dame” Patience Jonathan has by now securely established well-deserved notoriety for herself as someone who is compulsively incapable of stringing together a single sentence that is not a comical ridicule of the English language. There is probably no public figure in Nigeria’s recent history who has publicly and mindlessly murdered basic English syntax with as much recklessness and regularity as “Dame” Patience Jonathan, whose middle name is now “umblera” on account of her widely publicized, laughably consistent mispronunciation of “umbrella” (the People's Democratic Party’s icon) when she stumped for her husband recently. (Watch the "umblera" video below). See NVS Discussion on "Umblerra" Although I have been greatly entertained by the First Lady’s hilariously uneducated speech mannerisms and solecisms, I used to be one of her greatest defenders during informal conversations with my friends. I had frankly thought that she had not had the privilege of getting a formal education, and so I had attributed her rib-tickling gaffes to illiteracy. I had challenged some of my friends if any of their illiterate sisters, suddenly thrust to the limelight, could do better than “Dame” Patience Jonathan in public oral delivery and grammatical correctness. You can imagine my outrage when I discovered that the First Lady actually earned a National Certificate in Education (NCE) from the Rivers State College of Arts and Science in 1989 and a bachelor’s degree in biology and psychology from the University of Port Harcourt, her husband’s alma mater, in 1994. But what is even more scandalous is that she was a high school teacher for many years. Hmm. What did she teach her students? And in what language did she teach them? The Nigerian cyberspace—what I christened “Cyberia” in one of my academic writings—has lately been agog over the First Lady’s humorously embarrassing grammatical and pronunciational somersaults. That’s how I got to know about this. Her “umblera” (mis)pronunciational salvo is undoubtedly her most popular. It has drawn tens of thousands of eyeballs on YouTube, inspired several creative spoofs and remixes and is, I am reliably told, a hit ringtone among Nigerian mobile phone users. (I wonder how the “Dame” sings Rihanna’s hit single “Umbrella,” especially the “ella, ella” hook; I can’t wait for someone to do a spoof of that!) Other hilariously egregious errors attributed to the First Lady include the following: “My husband and Sambo IS A GOOD PEOPLE”; “the president was once a child and the SENATORS WERE ONCE A CHILDREN”; “my fellow widows” [she reportedly said this while addressing widows. We know whom to hold responsible if President Jonathan drops dead!]; “the people sitting before you here were ONCE A CHILDREN”; “it is not easy to CARRY SECOND in an international competition like this one”; “the bombers, who BORN them? WASN’T it not a woman? They were ONCE A CHILDREN, now A ADULT, now they are bombing women and children making SOME CHILDREN A WIDOW”; “my heart feels sorry for these CHILDREN WHO HAVE BECOME WIDOWS by losing their parents for one reason or another”; “We should have love for our fellow Nigerians irrespective of their NATIONALITY.” Four things are clear from these statements. First, the First Lady has clearly no sense of subject-verb agreement—much like her husband. Second, she doesn’t know the difference between “child” and “children.” She evidently never listened when her teacher taught “singular and plural” in her primary school. Three, she obviously has no clue that “fellow” is used to refer to people who share a commonality with you, so she doesn’t realize that by calling the widows “my fellow widows” she means that her husband is dead, too. Four, she has not the vaguest idea that “widow” is not an all-purpose word for people who have lost their loved ones. That’s why she (correctly) uses it for women whose husbands are dead AND (incorrectly) for orphans, i.e., children whose parents are dead. I can forgive her use of the Nigerian Pidgin English expressions “carry second” [place second] and “born” [gave birth]—and her misuse of the word “nationality” when talking about Nigerians who actually all share the same nationality. After all, her husband, who claims to have a Ph.D. in zoology, recently said at a political rally that we are“diverse in terms of different human species.” If a putative Ph.D. in zoology (the branch of biology that studies animals, including humans) doesn’t know enough to know that all humans belong to the same species, why should we expect a less educated, grammatically challenged “Dame” to know that all Nigerians belong to the same nationality? But, seriously, the stupefying ignorance of Nigeria’s First Family provokes many troubling queries. If the president and his wife, who should be our role models, can’t even obey the most basic rules of our national language (which, by the way, they, like all of us who went to school, learned from elementary school to university) why do we express phony outrage in the national media every year when we are confronted with data of mass failure in English in school certificate exams? We expect our kids to pass “O” level English in high school, and we collectively wail hypocritically when mass failure is recorded in school certificate exams. We also, as an official policy, expect our kids to pass “O” level English as a precondition to even read Nigerian languages in our universities. But we lower the standards—and expectations— when we assess the performance of our political and public leaders. Suddenly, we remember that English isn’t native to us. What galling double standard! I recently had an argument with a passionate defender of the Dame’s habitually unenviable grammatical and speech aberrations. My interlocutor advanced the sadly familiar infantile argument that the First Lady's foibles should be excused because English isn’t our native language. But a single question I posed to her shut her up. I asked her if she would honestly want her daughters to imitate the Dame’s speech mannerisms and indefensible grammatical imperfections. She was quiet. When I pressed her further, she shamefacedly said “no.” But a First Lady is supposed to be a role model for young girls. So I wondered aloud: if you don’t want your girls to grow up to be like “Dame” Patience Jonathan, why should you defend her consistently embarrassing slips? You got it: hypocrisy! The excuse that English isn’t our native language and therefore shouldn’t be the basis for judging the public address of public figures is just downright silly and duplicitous, especially for a woman whose first name is an English word (is there no word for “Patience”—and, for that matter, “Good Luck”!— in Ikwerre or Ijaw?), who bears the English title “Dame” even though she has never been conferred that title by the Queen of England (who language she has formed a habit of murdering), and whose people’s “traditional” sartorial symbol is a colonial felt hat handed down to them by English colonialists! (For the record, I have no problems with the Niger Delta's symbolic fedora; I only have a problem with people who ignore its obvious colonial origins but rail at people who insist on a basic proficiency with the English language, another hold-over of our colonial encounter with England). The First Lady has three options. One option is to speak to us in Ikwerre (which I am told is her native language) and get an English translator. The second option is to address her audiences in Nigerian Pidgin English, which she speaks quite proficiently and which most Nigerians understand. The third, and perhaps best, option is for her to remain silent. She doesn’t have to speak in public. A popular aphorism says, “It’s better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” |
Re: Patience "Umblerra" Jonathan Has A Degree In Biology! by slyopez(m): 3:46pm On Mar 22, 2011 |
Whats the fuss, Isn't she communicating ? Her communication skill is accepted by 95% nigerians (market women,traders,okada riders, even the so called intellects:professors etc) other than speaking big grammar that'll be comprehended by merely 60% of 9ja. Abeg make una leave Sisi alone. |
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