chaircover:

LOL you guys havent met Ms Ama Desprado

with 3 babymommas in the picture? she would run for cover!

coogar:

the plan is lame.

the best way of getting rid of a babe is to make her feel she's the one dumping you. they relish in that kind of victory that the man is a jerk.
so let the op set up a scenario. . . . .he forgot to log out his email/facebook/whatever whatever. his friends would have loaded that email with plenty of sassy mails from strings of women and even babymomma! if the girl has any dignity, that should make her go angry and she would be the one dumping the op!

This plan would surely fail.

The guy said he has hinted her and she still didnt send. She is ready to accept anything just to get that ring. You dont know Naija girls. they would tell him that even though you are cheating, I have forgiven you.

Dont you know that naija girls would rather fight the girl than face the boyfriend? How many girls have you seen fighting over boyfriends especially in hostels when the guy is currently phocking their 4th friend in his own house in quarters

Chaircover, Can you fault my plan?

dayokanu:

This plan would surely fail.

The guy said he has hinted her and she still didnt send. She is ready to accept anything just to get that ring. You dont know Naija girls. they would tell him that even though you are cheating, I have forgiven you.

Dont you know that naija girls would rather fight the girl than face the boyfriend? How many girls have you seen fighting over boyfriends especially in hostels when the guy is currently phocking their 4th friend in his own house in quarters

Chaircover, Can you fault my plan?

if this one fails then he should do the almighty formular.

rent one heavily pregnant woman to come knock his door.
her story must be believable - the op knocked her up few months ago and promised her marriage!

[size=20pt]It is not new at all[/size] Read this:

It all started in 2005 when I first dated this girl. Unfortunately we lost contact the same year and didn't see again till about 6years.
Luckily for me I , read more http://thewilfreds.com/2011/12/should-i-allow-her-to-continue-double-dating/

@Elizadath,

Do not make the greatest mistake in your life. You are very lucky to see a woman who cared and looked after you for six years.

I guess she is still looking after you now after six years.

Develop true love for this woman now because she is your angel. If you take someone else, well, you are on your own.

Just let her go, you both were wrong on the hand that you openly let her invest in your life knowing fully well that you can't bless her with what she desire from you and she thinking investing or showering a dude with care would automatically give her a free ticket to marriage kingdom

please let her know its over and it would be best you two move on with your life because every second of you contemplating on not hurting her but knowing is not gonna work is indirectly killing her. No matter how you chose to go about it someone must get hurt. why prolong the pain

6 farking years in a relationship and  the outcome of it is still vague yet I still sit my a.ss down all in the name of LOVE. I be damned

The lady would cry that why did he do it, She would even blame the woman for "wanting to eat where she didnt sow"

And would call the pregnant woman agent of devil that wants to Spoil her happiness. She would fight the woman or even agree to adopt the child.

ANYTHING JUST TO GET THE RING

The plan can be modified thus.

The guy should ask her if she is willing to be a second wife and they would both live in the same house

If after all these she still agrees, then use the second plan

And OP, Dont even sleep with her unless you have a Michelin tyre condom from your chest to the sole of your feet

dayokanu:

And OP, Dont even sleep with her unless you have a Michelin tyre condom from your chest to the sole of your feet

he can get injections from his doctor - to make him temporary sterile.
he would fire blanks for a period of 1 yr or 6 months.

if he keeps on abstinence, the alarm bells would ring soundly.
if he wears condoms, the chic would also get the message. chics are not that dumb and if the op has been skin-diving in the past, how's he gonna convince her about condoms.

[s]threat: complete rubbish i must say.

@OP, bleep death. A man dies once, if you marry this girl you'll die many times before your real death[/s]

Guy no marry out of pity, But as a person I don't like what your doing because you should have told her all these while, forget pity of breaking her heart because their heart is more flexible than our own.

What was on your mind when you guys started moving out for the very first time?

This is pure wickedness. How could you date someone for SIX YEARS, only to turn back that you don't love her! Haba!

I once dated a girl, and we both love each other. But because I wasn't fully okay marrying her, we had to part ways. She wept and pleaded, but I made her realize it better for us to separate now than later. We broke up, not because I found someone else, but becos I do not want to make mistakes.

It is selfish to keep someone you don't love for six years. Bros you must Marry her by force.

@ OP, you owe nobody an explanation. So if you do not care about her anymore, please leave her and continue living your life. Like the saying goes, never get into a marriage or relationship out of pity because you would immensely regret that decision.

Your only serious offence here was not calling of the relationship earlier and having wasted each others time for so long. Whatever she invested in you is irrelevant and shouldn't be a means to ruin your happiness and future. Afterall most women would leave a man once the going gets tough and never look back even after he invested the world in her.

That said, you sound like you are scared of this woman and she is older than you, that is messed up if true. This is the reason i never accept a penny from any woman that i'm dating. Even on birthdays, i do not want your gift just congratulate me and keep it moving.

kolexy:

This is pure wickedness. How could you date someone for SIX YEARS, only to turn back that you don't love her! Haba!

I once dated a girl, and we both love each other. But because I wasn't fully okay marrying her, we had to part ways. She wept and pleaded, but I made her realize it better for us to separate now than later. We broke up, not because I found someone else, but becos I do not want to make mistakes.

It is selfish to keep someone you don't love for six years. Bros you must Marry her by force.

pot calling kettle black. did you marry yours by force?

First off "love" is NOT the most important quality for marriage.Anyone still waiting for the fairy tale love that would sweep him/her off is not yet ready to marry.There are lot more to successful marriage than love.

Love grows,comes,increases each day as long as other ingredients like mutual and self respect,open communication exist.So,YES OP and his babe can make this marriage work ONLY if he decides within himself to make it work and stop hiding behind the "i don't love her anymore" bullshit.
When everything else is present,love falls in along the line.

BTW,How come no one noticed the OP fell out of love with his 6 years old flame cos he's got a younger girl ? He stopped loving the old babe cos hes got money and a younger babe to boot?

I wish that girl deals with him severely,next time he'd think twice and deeply before making fake marriage promise that he has no intention of honoring.6 years of countless DandC's or at best constant morning after pills.who he wanna leave the damaged goods for ?

ifyalways:

First off "love" is NOT the most important quality for marriage.Anyone still waiting for the fairy tale love that would sweep him/her off is not yet ready to marry.There are lot more to successful marriage than love.

Love grows,comes,increases each day as long as other ingredients like mutual and self respect,open communication exist.So,YES OP and his babe can make this marriage work ONLY if he decides within himself to make it work and stop hiding behind the "i don't love her anymore" bullshit.
When everything else is present,love falls in along the line.

BTW,How come no one noticed the OP fell out of love with his 6 years old flame cos he's got a younger girl ? He stopped loving the old babe cos hes got money and a younger babe to boot?

I wish that girl deals with him severely,next time he'd think twice and deeply before making fake marriage promise that he has no intention of honoring.6 years of countless DandC's or at best constant morning after pills.who he wanna leave the damaged goods for ?

Sorry to quote you but how did you come to the conclusion that he made a marriage proposal to this lady because you have been repeating it on this thread when the OP never mentioned anything like that.
On page one of this thread, you started it as an assumption and now you are stating it as fact. Please do not put words into people's mouth 'cause it is a very aggravating thing to do.

@OP:  You stood someone up for 6 good years? Do you know what it would do to the lady for you to hurt her? People are so wicked Oo! I feel so sad for the lady though.

coogar:

he can get injections from his doctor - to make him temporary sterile.
he would fire blanks for a period of 1 yr or 6 months.

if he keeps on abstinence, the alarm bells would ring soundly.
if he wears condoms, the chic would also get the message. chics are not that dumb and if the op has been skin-diving in the past, how's he gonna convince her about condoms.

This is the craziest suggestion so far. I will be interested in knowing the drug that can make a man to fire blank for some period of time. I hope he doesn't fire blank for his remaining miserable yrs on earth

Hey wat do u want me to suggest? uve known wat is at stake here, u heard her right, never trash those words cos she means them

//

Elizadath
Posts: 61

Offline

She Has Invested So Much In Me. Now She Want Marriage And I Dont Love Her Anymore.
« on: Yesterday at 01:15:24 PM »
We met in schl. She was lucky to get a very good job while i am looking for one. She invested all she had on me. This is the 6th yr of this relationship. I have tried all means to cut her off but she won't let go. My problem is that i can't say it to her face that i am no more in love with her. Cos i dnt wnt to hurt her. Now i have found my dear love. She is asking for marriage but i can't marry her; i want to get married too (but, ) pls help me what do i do now am so confuse

What goes around, comes around bro. Trying to be clever. The world's very small, very very small. If you want to live the rest of your days with peace of mind, you know what to do. . .

The poster is obviously an extremely poor boy from a poverty stricken home.

He was only with his 'sponsor' 'cus he had no choice.

Surely no matter your antics or excuses, Nemesis and Karma will always take place.

@Poster: I don't envy you o,

poster you are in HOT soup ooo but as for me, i dont advice marriage out of pity but if you think you are doing a right thing you are a man and take up your decision your self but remember you reap what you sow if eventually the one you said you love start mis-behaving

all these plans i see up there would work with "normal" woman BUT the lady in this thread is DERANGED! she wont take no for an answer and i wouldnt even be surprised if she accepts being wifey #2.

@poster
there are no TWO ways about this issue: you let her know about NOT wanting to be with her any longer, pack your stuff and LEAVE!!!! pls, for smoother transition, i suggest you pack and take your stuff away BEFORE (when she is away), and then let her know the good news as she comes back home. these women of today can lose their minds in such evil ways that you never know what she may do. (someone even suggested acid bath, kai!!!!)
make sure you stay well away from where you have been hanging out (for a while) and advise your new babe to be careful.

the longer you stay with this deranged woman, the harder it will be to get rid of her sorry self. you dont want to be there. . . . . . . .this is not a r/ship, this is CAPTIVITY!!!!

if people fall out of love after even 20yrs, there is no reason why you couldnt do the same after 6yrs. the catch is that you KNOW you can get on with your life, while she probably cant due to some narrow minded cheap reasons!

Question: What do failed marriages and HIV have in common?
Answer: Their numbers have increased dramatically in the last three decades!

It is a pity that some ill-informed persons think that an institution as sacred as marriage is a business venture where you back out if it is not profitable. Little wonder, divorce rates are at an all-time high. No man should marry a girl simply because the girl has helped him in some way. For GOD's sake, marriage is not a payment tool that you should use it to reward someone who helped you. Marriages founded on such fake foundations are pre-scheduled for a very loud failure!

Marriages based on any of these below-mentioned elements are failure-bound:

He or she loves you.
You want to be free from parents.
To have sex.
To ease loneliness.
To be happy.
To show you are an adult.
Because of a pregnancy.
To save or help someone.
Because you want a baby.
For money.
Because all your friends are married.
You've always wanted a fancy wedding.
Out of fear that no one else will want to marry you.
You think you are running out of time to get married.
For immigration purposes.
You are tired of being single.
You don't want people gossiping about the two of you living together.
Because the person helped you in the past.

Instead, marry for these reasons:

You are in love with one another.
A desire to share your life with another.
To have a lifetime companion.
Realistic expectations.
Willingness to help one another fulfill their own needs and dreams.
Willingness to tolerate each other's weaknesses.

The guy should put the matter in prayers. He should politely involve people close to the girl and explain to her why the marriage will not work. Be firm. If you marry out of fear, then it's an invalid marriage, that is, it was never a marriage in the first place! Such "marriages" don't even require divorce to be dissolved because it was never a marriage in the first place. Marriage must precede divorce.

Jeez, you waited for 6 years to tell her this shit. Plus, you must initially have given her the impression that you were gonna marry her. Nna, you get mind o. You don turn Maradona

.NET

double wahala for deadybody , ol boy u leave her she kill you lol , u go ahead marry her u are unhappy , treat her bad she poison your food and you die , lolzz  

all these women saying yo must marry her or not , dont mind dem o , what giv u d assurance that in d next 10 years , she wont be the one to tell you i dont love you anymore , anyway sha na ur luck ,but if na me sha o i go ahead marry her cos , i prefer a lady that love me more than i do   if only u know what i mean , guys in my shoes will tell  

then you are chopper!

What nonsense, leave her and move on with your life. No crime committed.

Lot of guys invested in their GFs by sending to school from High Sch to Uni. Yet the got jilted at the end and noting happen.

Just one woman manage to spend money on her BF people are shouting.

Why do women shout Karma when they a on the receiving end.

Karma ko koma ni.

interesting responses!

@OP, you started dying from the day of ur birth just like the rest of us, k, so need to fear death in and of itself!
so,

1) you let a woman take care of you for 6 years and it's weak men who do that, right?

2) You did not have the guts to tell her you do not love her and wants to leave! fear

3) you sneak behind her to get another woman! conniving

4) you r worried but not worried enough to care what she may do when she finds out and she will! stubborn

5) she want to kill u and u believe it! cowardice

6)anyways, its obvious that its ur character flaws that got ya into the tight rope u just found urself now n ive read all responses so far and can not see how u gonna get out of this without some1 getting hurt!

7) i doubt that this woman wants to spend the rest of her life in a loveless marriage, you take things too seriously! women frequently say they will die if u leave them but since they are generally stronger than us when it comes to love, they will be the 1st to start dating a new man after they say that to u and once you have been through that 2times, u learn to not listen anytime a woman says if u leave me, i will kill u or i will die

but you can not be a prisoner with this woman, unless she was a virgin when u 1st met, you have no moral obligation to marry her if you dont love her anymore! you do not also have any legal obligation to marry her for the things she did for u out of love so u r free to leave, trust me, she will be fine -but it's u i worry about!

at the end of the day, as we say here in America "ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AS IN WAR"

trust me Mr. just do ur thing, this fine generous lady of urs will be just fine at the end, if she was as kind to u as u said she has been, its gonna be ur loss, because it's better as a man to be with a woman who adore u if u truly want to be happy in this life!

wish u both luck

na wa oooooo,pls the guy involve is not longer interested why ?is the lady money or investor money finish ?if you were enjoying the lady and the money pls they are more benefit ahead when u marry her cos ur type are the lazy one who always want to  look for a  lady who has made it ,hope the one u are loving now is not another investor?be careful so you don´t die young.pls if you can stay six year and tolerated her ,u can as well marry and be happy with her too.