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Should Have Stayed With My Ex. - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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How Long Have You Ever Stayed Without Se.x Since You Were Deflowered?? / What Is The Longest Time You Have Stayed Apart From Your Lover And Gotten Back? / Should I Tell My Ex-Boyfriend That I Want Him Back? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Yeske2(m): 10:07am On Mar 13, 2012
@OP,were you blind or pressured or what? I guess you married him because of money when you know your heart doesn't belong to him. A lesson to other ladies out there.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by chuks49(m): 10:18am On Mar 13, 2012
queensmith: People always think this, theres meant to be fear of the unknown not a longing towards it! lol

OP trust me when I tell you your ex is not the perfect man you believe in, in fact he's the complete opposite. Which is the reason why you probably broke up and he is now your ex.
I think you should make an effort to look forward into the future rather than waste time pondering about your past. It's not fair on your husband foy you to harbour these thoughts and you owe it to him to forget about all the nonsense and focus om your marriage.
It's early days and you are already carrying on like this, I fear for the future of your marriage!

You can't be serious
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by desthan(m): 10:19am On Mar 13, 2012
@OP. . . ''Better suck it up''

How can you come here with this garbage? Your friend who was trying to justify this thread said she saw a condom in her husband's pocket, so it was a license to screw ex . What is your own reason?? What did you see in your man's pocket that makes you begin to miss your Ex?

4 months ka, chei!!! its a shame.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Jemibee: 10:25am On Mar 13, 2012
My dear, i advice u bind (with prayers) that spirit that makes u think about ur ex all day. It definately isn't the spirit of God. What God has joined 2geda, let no man put asunder... Pls try to focus on ur marriage and it shall be well.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Jay5000(m): 10:28am On Mar 13, 2012
Feel sorry 4 d poor dude who's sumwhre thinking he's married a virtuous wife. If only he knew how much his wife regrets marrying him... sad wonder y someone wld go into a marriage she'll regret for the rest of her life. Stories like these make me wonder if it's necessary to even get married at all.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Killz3(m): 10:36am On Mar 13, 2012
Jemibee: My dear, i advice u bind (with prayers) that spirit that makes u think about ur ex all day. It definately isn't the spirit of God. What God has joined 2geda, let no man put asunder... Pls try to focus on ur marriage and it shall be well.
Leave them. Instead of asking her to focus, someone is saying it is normal to think of ex when a lady is married. shocked Nothing wey i no go read for NL! grin grin grin grin If to say na bf/gf relationship, i fit consider am, but the line has been crossed. YOU ARE MARRIED! grin
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Yehtunedey: 10:38am On Mar 13, 2012
just pray to God and He will surely lead u through,cos this is very bad and i have never heard of such a thing....... shocked
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by juleze(f): 10:40am On Mar 13, 2012
I feel so ashamed that men who are supposed to head homes, can sink so low as to view a lady they do not know as the woman "who said no" to them because they are broke, or their "girlfriend who left" because they couldnt afford to give her money. You take pleasure in finally being able to bash a lady because you've got no balls to tell off your exes face to face, so hide behind your screen and have fun at a vulnerable woman's expense.
Shame on you!
Please start acting like men, and stop being petty.
I'm sure most of those ladies left you not because you are broke, but because you are poor and very sorry excuses for men.
Please grow up.

For Jesus to have stood by an adulterous woman, and forgave her, who do you think you are?

@OP: your post is vague. What exactly is the issue? Why are you tired of the marriage?
What do you miss about your ex?
Were you sexually intimate with him?

There was a woman who shared her soul tie story. She had been sexually involved with only one man before getting married. She had also become a Born again christian.
Into the marriage she began to feel a strong sexual pull towards her ex and was afraid she would be tempted to cheat with him. She knew she wasn't in love with him any longer which got her perplexed.
Fortunately, she was blessed with a real man, which led her to share the challenge with him.
They both realised it was a soul-tie, she went for deliverance and got set free.
They are from the Western country.
Could this be your case?
Enlighten us more.

Pls remember that "marriage is honorable, the bed undefiled". Please don't defile your marriage bed.
The devil is strongly against marriage and fights even the strongest of them.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Esinwaju: 10:52am On Mar 13, 2012
Those of you who are quick to conclude that the OP is regretting her marriage to her hubby and missing her ex before because the later is more financially well-off than the former are clotpoles. The first thing a sensible person would do is ask questions since the OP original post is not detailed enough. Just a few lines and some people here are hyperdeducting and casting aspersions at the lady.

1 Like

Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by dridowu: 11:01am On Mar 13, 2012
owo2390: you are probably thinking of the good memories of the relationship but remember there was a reason you left him in the first place.

Also, its unfair to your current husband that you are thinking about your ex because you are not giving him your whole heart. Tell him about your dilemma and maybe you can find a favorable solution to your problem.
i like ds
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by andyanders: 11:03am On Mar 13, 2012
Op, what you needed is counselling. Many people feel same way, but are calling you names because you came out with your problem. Don't feel bad if you are been hauled stones here.

There are many negative things you must have discovered from your present husband that your ex-boyfriend has.Or it could be because of money that pushed you away from your ex-boyfriend as your present husband could be financially balanced than your ex. Also, hope you never had any blood covenant with your ex. If you had any form of covenant with your ex-boyfriend, you needed ONLY deliverance to bring you out of that as your marriage will be tormented.

Understand that in marriage, you needed perseverance, patience, tolerant, and most especially prayers to succeed in marriage as the taste of friendship is not the taste of marriage.

No 2 perfect people on earth as a result, you have to understudy your husband and home and accept him for who he is. Work on his weakness and your own weakness for a greater tomorrow. Life is just temporal and therefor, you should be focused and adjust your mind to having a fulfilled life than thinking about your past. Find something to keep yourself busy if you are a full time housewife. I wish you the best and note that nothing on the face of earth that is new. Everything is vanity.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Ninapha(f): 11:27am On Mar 13, 2012
There are many pretenders on nairaland. I am sure more than 80% of people felt this way one time or the other when there is trouble in their present relationship.

@ Poster, Your Ex is ur Past and can never become your future. Only you can say why you people separated in the first place. Find something about your husband that makes u happy and hold on to it. spice up your marriage and be free to tell your husband things that make you happy and wanted. Stop comparing your husband and your ex rather focus on bringing new love to your marriage and uphold the values you have ever dreamt in your marriage. wishing u all the best.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by iykay4455(m): 11:37am On Mar 13, 2012
Wow...this means there is a likelyhood you will cheat on your husband with your ex
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by pinkrex(m): 11:40am On Mar 13, 2012
~Killz~:
Lmao @ "help" a woman married less than 4 months to escape back to her ex. grin grin grin grin Chineke! shocked

Help to do what exactly? To carry your cross? To bear the consequences of leaping before looking?

Are you fccking kidding me? angry When they read you "for better for worse till death do you part" were you pinging? undecided

Were you smoking when you said "I do?" sad sad angry
hehehe i love this. Women actually live in a world of 'video' games. They always wana eat their cake and have it.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by bigtune: 11:47am On Mar 13, 2012
u re just obsessed about him,i believe with time you ll butt his thought out of his mind. please be loyal to your husband,dont even try any illicit affair with ur ex, because ur husband deserve ur loyalty.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by luckgames(m): 12:07pm On Mar 13, 2012
OK2NVME: All of u critisizing shuld shut dah hell up!

Chics get married 4 several reasons these days and its not all about luv.

I pray u never get put in that impossible position

You need to shut the Bleep up
She can walk away
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Ejaisky: 12:22pm On Mar 13, 2012
Uhmmm. I didn't marry my husband because of money. I've a good job. My ex is richer than my husband but my husband is a better man than him. I'm sure i'm feeling this way because of the bond i shared with him and his family. I left him because he didn't love me as much as i loved him and he wasn't treating me well too. I've been told it's a phase 4 most newly weds. I'm nt evil. Thanks to all 4 d bashings and advice.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Okontami: 12:35pm On Mar 13, 2012
Ejaisky: Please help me. I got married last December and I can't stop thinking about my ex. I can't stop regretting i should have gotten married to him instead of my husband.
Thank God.. Please let your story be a lesson to ladies out there who want to eat their cake and have it. But what did u see in your new man that was not in your EX. Its really funny how ladies will leave their guys of 3 to 5 years for a new chap they just met in 2months. They are enjoying the new spark of love and life they are seeing now with the new guy forgetting that the spark was just like this when they first met their ex boyfriend. Most ldies have short memories and that always lead them into rouble. Now look at you. Its either you carry your cross accept your fate or you walk out of that marriage cos if you try shit you might get killed by your husband who might be very obsessed with you. Then we will watch you on CRIME and Investigation CRIME OF PASSION at 8:00PM on WE TV grin
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Okontami: 12:55pm On Mar 13, 2012
~Killz~:

It's only people that don't "really" value marriage and what it entails that'll not understand what is really going on here. . . This aint no boyfriend/girlfriend relationship! Since we can't flog her physically, we'll flog her lyrically. . . wink
KILLZ Alias lyrical WERE
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by baby1402(f): 1:29pm On Mar 13, 2012
U should try and give urself a chance with your husband, cos there must be lots of good in him for you to have decided to marry him instead of your ex. And if for any reason u went into this marriage just to spite ur ex, maybe for having wronged you somehow, then u r in trouble, cos the love you have for your husband is not real, its your ex u still love. You shall always be haunted by that, unless you try and forget him and try to love your husband, who may even turn out to be the best thing you ever deserve. Things happen for a reason, so, surely, ur situation is for a reason. Relax and try to find out wot the reason is. But dont leave this man, cos u may end up with non at the end of the day. Ur ex may not want u after all u did to him. or he may prove to be a devil in disguise. THINK!!!!
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Nobody: 1:43pm On Mar 13, 2012
KILLZ, ARE U gay, I SWEAR I'VE ALREADY FALLEN IN LOVE WITH YOU, CROWN KING, UNA TOO MUCH
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by AVISENNA: 1:57pm On Mar 13, 2012
This will always be the story all round the world. It's just a case of love gone "bad". Someone asked why you left him in the first place and believe me , if you can sincerely answer that question it will be much easier to live with consequences of your actions. Please i stand to be corrected, you opted out because of :

1. You felt cause he wasn't showing signs of taking the relationship to the next level. angry
2. Your patience seemed to be wearing thin, .
3. friends and family (mother) must have advised you to move on if you don't want to die an old maid. cry
4. Last but one of the hidden reason : you don't want to live a life that is less than ordinary ($$$$$$$$$$$$$$$), the guy no too grab abi? kiss shocked
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by queensmith: 2:02pm On Mar 13, 2012
chuks49:

You can't be serious


im very serious you got a problem?
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by vbet: 2:13pm On Mar 13, 2012
Op, never mind d insults. a lot of people have lots of evil intents but never voice it out which usually make them to carry it out. Now that u've bared ur mind, is better.Just bear in mind that ur ex is not available for you again except on evil ground which is committing adultry. Begin to see ur husband excellent qualities and develop geniune love for him. Most importantly, pray to fight d devil who may want to use such feelings to destroy ur marriage especially when ur ex thought comes into your mind. With time, he will fade forever away from ur mind. REMEMBER, He is not as perfect as ur mind is creating him to be!!
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Confilass: 2:14pm On Mar 13, 2012
U need to get ur mind off ur ex. If ur ex actually love u he won't have let u go. Just take it dat u were not meant for each other.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Danjosyus(m): 4:52pm On Mar 13, 2012
angelhair: I wish you guys would get off her back. @op, I understand because I have bn in ur shoes. When I was married, my husband started d beating during our honeymoon! I was doing laundry a few months into d marriage and I saw a condom in his pocket. It wasn't for me because I was pregnant then. I hated him. I cursed him and I wanted to get back with my ex.
You guys can never understand what she is going thru to make her think that. My dear op it does get better. Hang in there my love and tell it all to God. He really understands what you are going thru and he will make things well with you. Take care luv!



I think I now understand wat cud b goin on wit her provided her situation is similar somwat 2 urs. Its gud somtyms nt 2 b parochial in thinkin and try 2 understand y pple say or do d thins dy do.
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by sylve11: 4:57pm On Mar 13, 2012
kindly states ur reasons why u didn't marry ur ex and also states the reasons why u got married to ur husband, may be we can help from ur reasons. cool cool cool
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by chines4(m): 5:46pm On Mar 13, 2012
@Poster,

I know that there is a diff. b/w what we want and what we actually get when we get married. Most ppl crucifying the lady are single and are talking out of ignorance. I want you to understand one thing, [/b]No man loves u more than u'r husband[b], Relationship is like marketing every one is in his/her best behavior, some can equally claim what they are not. But marriage will bring out the best and worse in us.

Trust me if your married to u'r ex You may be think about the ex before the ex. such is life, we intend to value what we don't have than what we have. Ask men that follow women outside, they will tell you.

Focus on u'r husband and be creative to enjoy u'r marriage. U'rs is still too young
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by othenok(f): 5:53pm On Mar 13, 2012
My dear, what you re going through is normal. Believe me d grass is not always greater at d other side.
I personally don't ve regret for anything in my life cos i believe its 4 my good. What does't kill u makes u stronger.
It is well! As u get 2 knw n understand ur spouse better ur ex would be a non issue. Cheers
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Steadyangel(f): 5:57pm On Mar 13, 2012
re u a house wife? Or u enjoy staying @ home n thinking abt ur past n present.....I think d best way 4 u to get dis off ur mind is by saying NO REGRETS, I was rite wen I said I DO......if there's anytin ur hubs is not doing well dearest u can tell him calmly 'sweetest why don't we try it dis way', ' baby I tink I shd teach u dis, it turn me on', pause n wait 4 his response, don't rush over n don't nag or frawn wen he says no......
Secondly try n make real n sensible friends......if possible u can go back to school n further ur education.....no knowledge is a waste.

TRY IN A CUNNY WAY N TEACH UR HUBS THAT SKILL UR EX EXHIBIT THAT U CANNOT FORGET ABT HIM....
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Nobody: 6:37pm On Mar 13, 2012
Ejaisky: Luckgames and kills, i asked for help nt insults. I wouldn't cheat on my husband.

U will, it's jst a question of time
Re: Should Have Stayed With My Ex. by Nobody: 6:38pm On Mar 13, 2012
you deserve no respect from me so i say to you,
idiots like you will always sleep with their former lovers even after marriage.

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