afam4eva: All the Igbo sisters i know that married Yoruba men are divorced. Does this say anything?

Except my the one married to my my mums cousin( their first child is about 42years now) the one that is married to my church member, married now for 14 years and she's a consultant. Well polygamy does not mean you are not a good lover, I cannot judge what I don't understand. Then the story becomes sweeter when the issue of Yoruba/ Ibo twist came into it , I can probably guess the motive; that is by the way anyhow. In as much as the story is pathetic, let just say that single mums can still find love, it now depends on them to be realistic and be sincere to themselves if not allowing the burden of the previous relatuonship carry over to the next. Finding love no be problem na how maintain the love and live happily after na im matter. The truth is some are terrible and will present themselves in a good light, however, after getting settled,their true colours starts emerging. A friend of mine met one , loved her and was willing to go all the way. After their firs child together, he wanted to get married as quickly as possible then behold the woman comong out with the most nastiest attitude! It became so sad that the guy is refusing her now after depositing over 450,000 for a hall forthe wedding ^ months before the initial date. There's now a second kid but my guy despite the fact that he wants to be with his kids and and send about 40% of his earnings to them said he'd rather stay single for life than marrry the woman that he really made a mistalke of opting for her in the first place

Yourr chance of finding love is very high. Just be careful in acceptiong a man who will not treat u badly but love you and your Son. Goodluck

Vergil:

Hi Acelifted,
U seem to know about religion. Soz that this is off topic. But what's ur take on divorce? Cos I've read somewhere, think Mathews. Where it says, Men should not marry divorced women.
This thought came up when you used Joyce Meyers as an example.
Just curious

[b]Yeah, the chapter in which that is contained is Matt 19:3 - downwards and Mark 10.9. Note the phrase "what God has joined together, let no man put asunder" in both chapters. The question is that most often than not, God never ordained these matrimonies. they are established on wrong foundations of lust or other parochial reasons which are very far from the original purpose God ordained for us before we were conceived in our mothers' wombs. Take it or leave it, Even when you marry according to God's will, the sin nature in every man will want to push you to opt out of such marriage when faced with challenges (which is certain to come). This is exactly what God does not like for you will ruined the plans He has for you, just like you would have ruined it if you got married outside His will in the first place. You are trying to "put asunder what God has joined together". But a marriage conceived on the foundation of lust and other material and parochial reasons is bound to crumble and ruin not only the so called husband and wife but the innocent children that will be born into such home. God will surely not trade the future of these innocent children. He will correct it if He has to. And if it means pulling you out of that doomed matrimony to a better one, for the sake of those kids, He will. This I am certain of. Does this means God has gone back on His word? No! it means God has carefully taken a clause in the law and used it to save this children before the devil, using the clout of religion, ruin the lives of those children, by making their mother (or father) remain in a matrimony he sure knows is headed for doom, for jump-started it in the first place.

The entire spirit world, God, Angels, Satan, Demon and Humans (earth) is a complicated legal web. And just like lawyers spend time to look for clauses in the human constitution they can twist to their advantage, So thus the devil. We need the Holy Spirit (who wrote the law in the first place) to help defeat the cunning satan (and his demons) who is millions of years old.[/b]

i believe there is more to this story than wat you have wrote.but irrespective of that let me just say firstly am sorry for the pain you felt.congrats for your baby boy,and lastly be strong for both of you.take care.

Can we talk?
send your number to 08187178167

"The man is from a polygamous family and deeply believed in divorce; infact 3weeks into the marriage he suddenly decared that divorce is an option when anyone of us gets tired. Bottom line, the marriage lasted for just 7 months."

You have not told us the WHOLE STORY
JUST YOUR SIDE OF THE STORY
3 WEEKS INTO THE MARRIAGE HE TOKE A STAND

Please i did not open this thread just to start a tribal war. Probably i shouldn't have included the tribes. For that i am sorry for getting y'all worked up.
This isn't about me painting myself a saint, i am far from being a saint. All i needed to know was just responses to my questions but why i included tribe is that the week we did the bride price stuff, he told me that men from his community take wives to be slaves and he quite proved it. (contributed to the seperation cos i got tired of being a slave to my husband, i was always lonely and tired)
Anyway everything is in the hands of God now. He who sees and knows the heart of man knows if i have lied against ex husband. "I wonder why i will even do that".
Like some of you said, there is more to the story. I don tire to talk and besides so many people think am lying. Everything na my fault but i don learn my lesson. PRAY TO GOD FOR DIRECTION, WATCH BEFORE I LEAP, HUMILITY (i have always been humble sha but the pride of ex husband is bigger than all the mountains on earth put together) etc etc. Thank you all soooo much. God bless.

Now people can see clearly why I said; tribe, religion, culture, tradition, norms, belief, education and family background play key roles in determining the success or failure of every marriage all over the world, so please always consider those things before making your choices, remember, dating is sweeter than marriage, certain things a man can ignore during dating but won't ignore once marriage sets in.

REALITY101:

Sure why not.

Just wondering why a sis from east got hooked up with a estupid arss yoruba dude. Just wondering

Just wondering, what difference does it make who she hooked up with. Now that her eyes are open she don't want to fall into the same trap as 1st time. "estupid" is EVERWHERE. Just wondering

@poster, take your time and be yourself. Love will come to you, don't go looking for it as you will find the wrong thing.

Gud luck

Yoruba men will always divorce igbo sisters because of the ways igbo people love to depend on their inlaws. How can i b caring for a wife+her parents + siblings at d same time? I would rather kick the woman out if she cant get her family off my back.
In the poster's case, u nead to hear both sides of d story because one thing dat is true about nigerian ladies is dat they are the best liars in d world. If u don't believe me, u must b living in the moon or u are a total bastard!

Marriage is a game of luck though, but those wishing to marry should apply wisdom, fervent prayer while considering other factors I mentioned. Meanwhile, it takes more than love to succeed in marriage, and also what tpaca....said still revolves around what I said about marrying your tribe becos things like that maybe the culture of the other partner' tribe, and not in the other, which brings in conflict, so to stand better chance, marry your tribe, but for those who chose otherwise, goodluck too....its all about luck!

My name is Morris I am a single Dad. I need a companion/wife can com from anywhere. Can I hook up with you if yes contact me on 08057810158. I am having similar problem most women will not want to marry me cos I have children. I will prefer to marry someone that has a kid. Talk to me if you are interested.

Marrying a man from a polygamous background is an error because the chances of marital failure is higher in such people from polygamous backgrounds except those who are conscious of this and are praying hard against it.Polygamy, and polygamous backgrounds is an evil foundation.
2ndly,the man deeply believed in divorce so from the onset, the marriage was doomed.The Bible says in Proverbs 6:2 that 'we are ensnared by our own words''.Also see Proverbs 12:13 and Proverbs 18:21
By his beliefs and pronouncements,he cursed his own marriage,that was why it crashed at 7 months.
You can not marry again for as long as the man is still living (Romans 7:1-3)(1 Corinthians 7:10-11)
If you do,you and the man who marries you commit adultery (Matthew 5:32).
You have to stay single for life or be reconciled to your husband.(1 Corinthians 7:11)
Forget divorce.(Malachi 2:16)
Looking for love outside the context of God's word is sin.
That's my advice for you based on Scripture(The Bible).

Single mums can never find love again. The OP specifically can NEVER find love again, trust me. All other things equal, given the choice between a tokunbo uterus and an "ochara," 99% of men will go for the "ochara." Thats just how it is. We all want the best of the best of everything. I refuse to settle for second best.

@strangerf you are very stupid, who will even date an earthworm like you! Buzz off! If you are a guy, can your girl friend be finer, intelligent, smarter, caring, understanding, sexier than a single mum? If you a girl, can u be finer, intelligent, smarter, caring, understanding, sexier than a single mum? Abeg just close your mouth, if you don't know what to say and is like you know the OP, and you are jealous of her!

PrettyCindy: I was married to a Yoruba man 2yrs ago (am from d East). The man is from a polygamous family and deeply believed in divorce; infact 3weeks into the marriage he suddenly decared that divorce is an option when anyone of us gets tired. Bottom line, the marriage lasted for just 7 months.

I did all I could to make our marriage work but I was totally frustrated. My pregnancy was 2 months old when he physically assaulted me repeatedly kicking my stomach. My child survived and he is 4 months old now, a healthy baby.

Now the thing is this, am a single mum now as we are finally seperated. What chances are there for single mum‘s to find love, are they discriminated against? Am not saying i want to start dating again now, i just want to know what its like for us out there.

"der's evry certainty dat u'ld find true luv.. I swear down"

strangerf: Single mums can never find love again. The OP specifically can NEVER find love again, trust me. All other things equal, given the choice between a tokunbo uterus and an "ochara," 99% of men will go for the "ochara." Thats just how it is. We all want the best of the best of everything. I refuse to settle for second best.

"i don't blame u who reasons lyk someone who's brain is in quarantine, u're juz dumb!"

call me i have a friend who need a single mother in Austra. Call me let me give u his no he want the single mum to come over to Austra. 08066692485

i'm a single parent and my child's father is an ibo man who was raised in a polygamous home. I have raised my child alone with no contribution from him or his family. he left when we were planning our wedding over a silly arguement. I was employed and still am, financially stable by the grace of GOD and i supported him as anyone would a friend and future husband. My child is 3 now. He didn't have a stable income at that time, he got one that would have paid him 3-4 times my salary when we knew there was a baby on the way. All this i attribute to the mercy of God through prayers. I was 4months pregnant when we left me after barely a month in his new job. He has lost it all now, back to square one and still has not learnt anything about life. My son and i are doing well with the support of my family. He's approaching 40......Bottomline is this, irresponsiblity of a man is not defined by tribe. There are irresponsible people all around us cutting across religion, tribe, social background and upbringing.True love is what matters, God's love......what we sow we reap.
@Poster...concentrate on the gift of God that has been committed into your hands. You are a custodian, be selfless and God will bring good your way.

Vavoom I will like to meet you. Can we chat text me on 08175736919

Some Single Mums are better than some Virgins. I bet you.

@ Winner 1

Not at this time, thanks. Beats me though why you have different phone numbers posted....lol!

knowledge4: Marrying a man from a polygamous background is an error because the chances of marital failure is higher in such people from polygamous backgrounds except those who are conscious of this and are praying hard against it.Polygamy, and polygamous backgrounds is an evil foundation.
2ndly,the man deeply believed in divorce so from the onset, the marriage was doomed.The Bible says in Proverbs 6:2 that 'we are ensnared by our own words''.Also see Proverbs 12:13 and Proverbs 18:21
By his beliefs and pronouncements,he cursed his own marriage,that was why it crashed at 7 months.
You can not marry again for as long as the man is still living (Romans 7:1-3)(1 Corinthians 7:10-11)
If you do,you and the man who marries you commit adultery (Matthew 5:32).
You have to stay single for life or be reconciled to your husband.(1 Corinthians 7:11)
Forget divorce.(Malachi 2:16)
Looking for love outside the context of God's word is sin.
That's my advice for you based on Scripture(The Bible).

At least you understand where the problem really started. There is truely power in the tongue. He believed in divorce and was ready for it to happen anytime because he believed he is goodlooking and can get another wife easily. So he didn't make any effort to make our marriage work. It was like a child's play to him. Anyway its all history now.
Coming to what you said about me not getting married again, we didn't do court wedding or church. It was just bride price payment which will be returned.
Now am more relaxed, God will send my own, i believe that.

cugresources: Now people can see clearly why I said; tribe, religion, culture, tradition, norms, belief, education and family background play key roles in determining the success or failure of every marriage all over the world, so please always consider those things before making your choices, remember, dating is sweeter than marriage, certain things a man can ignore during dating but won't ignore once marriage sets in.

[size=14pt]Lately you've become the most annoying nairalander. [/size]

PrettyCindy:
At least you understand where the problem really started. There is truly power in the tongue. He believed in divorce and was ready for it to happen anytime because he believed he is goodlooking and can get another wife easily. So he didn't make any effort to make our marriage work. It was like a child's play to him. Anyway its all history now.
Coming to what you said about me not getting married again, we didn't do court wedding or church. It was just bride price payment which will be returned.
Now am more relaxed, God will send my own, i believe that.

Forget about all those annoying people quoting bible verses to suit their whims. Whether or not you wedded in the church or in the judicial courts should not be a reason for you not to remarry. As I've stated before, you WILL find true love and get married again if it is your desire; and IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE to a man from your tribe! Forget about those silly, tribalistic villagers castigating you because you opted to marry a Yoruba man and not an Igbo man. There's no guarantee that if you marry your tribemate, you'll be in a more stable marriage. Sophia Chikere and Tchidi Chikere are both Igbos whose marriage has unfortunately failed. Not a good tale to hear but what's my point? Am just bringing to your attention that ANY marriage can fail, INCLUDING marriages between Igbos, or people from the same tribe. Marrying a person from a different tribe/race/religion does not mean that you dislike your own. Sometimes life just happens. Sometimes, we click more with people OUTSIDE our own tribes and sometimes, we find love and companionship in the deepest corners of this world, rather than within the world we know.

And why do we have people on this forum airing views which are as ancient as fossils? Even my own late grandpa wouldn't support those ancient, barbaric opinions. Are we in the 30s?

re love is hard to get,in dis world we cant live witout love wot i hv to advice is dont worry d real man is on his way,real love dont cost much pain,,,,,,,,,,,,jst take care of d one u hv if d story is real,xtain2rule@yahoo.com can help

xtain2rule: re love is hard to get,in dis world we cant live witout love wot i hv to advice is dont worry d real man is on his way,real love dont cost much pain,,,,,,,,,,,,jst take care of d one u hv if d story is real,xtain2rule@yahoo.com can help

Help how? And the story is damn real and it happened to me.

afam4eva: All the Igbo sisters i know that married Yoruba men are divorced. Does this say anything?

Says two things

1) You don't know many people
2) You're a m0r0n.

texazzpete:

Says two things

1) You don't know many people
2) You're a m0r0n.

O boy... what part of "All the Igbo sisters i know that married Yoruba men are divorced. Does this say anything?" don't you understand? Who's the slowpoke now?

afam4eva:
O boy... what part of "All the Igbo sisters i know that married Yoruba men are divorced. Does this say anything?" don't you understand? Who's the slowpoke now?

You're trolling as usual, and being a m0r0nic ethnic bigot as usual. End of story.

I believe if you find a God fearing man whether white,black,yoruba, hause ibo,ijaw,efik ibibio the marriage will not break up but to an ungodly man, women are like fruits each has its taste and he will always want fruit salad.

yes oooooooo am available if you are interested abmoslincoln@yahoo.com