I'm 39 Hes 25 - Romance - Nairaland
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My Aunt Married At 39 / I'm 39+ Can I Have A Boyfriend Now? / Am In Love With My Best Friend, But Hes Getting Married Soon To Another Girl! (2) (3) (4)
| I'm 39 Hes 25 by mayau(f): 1:25pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
I'm Malaysian and my boyfriend is Nigerian.We meet online but will be meeting him soon this month (hes currently studying in my country).Hes 25 and I'm39.The age different did not bother him and neither do I.He wants to go serious and even makes plan for our future.He even told his parents about me and wants to meet mine.The fact that I just got to know him less then a year makes me think hes being too fast?Due to the vast age gap I want to be just friend but he wants to go serious. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by ThoniaSlim(f): 1:31pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
Wait ohhhh, you say your a Malaysian and he's a Nigerian? a Nigerian guy in Malaysia serious about you. and your older than him.  ok ohhhh, let me not put sand in your garri. but i would advice you to shine your eyes well well  . am not saying his feelings towards you might not be genuine, but am just saying be careful, do not be to carried away, get to know him really well before you make really serious decisions. just my humble advice to you. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by adekennis(m): 1:40pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@Thoniaslim,are you trying to distract her mind away from her boy friend it as if you are criticising nigerian guys,pls pls is not fair  |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by ThoniaSlim(f): 1:43pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
abeg don quote me wrong ohhhhh, i did not say anything i simply gave her a honest advice from observations. I am fair ohhhh, most Nigerian guys in Malaysia ,  |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by Lola4eva(f): 1:43pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
hmmmmmmmmm the thing is that naija guys could be very funny, my advice to you try to give yourself more time to get to know him before making any commitment, the fact that u guys met online and ure way older is wat troubles me, u might think you know him when in fact u probably know next to nothing about him, pls meet one on one, spend time together and then try to decide whether he's mature enough for you even at 25, please tread carefully girl, all the best |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by xavier3(m): 1:49pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
i hope that you have chatted via webcam with the guy cos you never know how he might look like, and i urge you to be careful especially if he asks you for material tins like money, as for the age difference these things do happen that a younger guy fals in love with an older lady. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by rockiedink(m): 1:54pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
:-x :-x :-x |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by yimiton(f): 2:04pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
A 25 year old Nigerian Guy wants to marry a 39 year old woman, we're talking 14 solid years here! If it was the guy that was 14 years older, I'll be tempted to believe it's for real. My Dear Madam, this boy is definitely not serious, things like that don't happen in Nigeria for love. It could happen for material reasons or for visa, but not Just for the sake of love. I'll like to know how rich you are, how much do you spend on him, what other Nationality do you have aside being Malaysian, What makes you absolutely sure that he acutally told his parents about you and not some pre-arranged plp that he just got to talk to you on phone. I must tell you that it's not a regular thing for a younger man to marry an older woman in Nigeria how much more a much older woman. This is your call. Find out what you can and make your descision. Meanwhile, don't forget to come home to Nigeria to meet his parents and other extended family before you commit yourself to anything. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by jkpretty(f): 2:10pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
yimiton: Dear madam, note this point i just quoted & be wise. U don't need a soothsayer to tell u dat, this ur gentle man is out for u cos of what he thinks he might get. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by rockiedink(m): 2:17pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@yimiton and jkpretty you just burnt the poor guy's cable sha! |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by yimiton(f): 2:21pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@ rockiedink Would you rather have burnt the woman's cable?  These Nigerian Yahoo yahoo boyz! |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by rockiedink(m): 2:23pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
well,  |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by mayau(f): 3:12pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@Thoniaslim @JKpretty @Lola4eva Thank you very much you all for your advice.I really appreciate it. @Xavier3 Yes, we've chatted via webcam and no so far he did not ask for anything material except that he ask if I'll cook for him. @Yimiton No, I did not spend any money on him.Infact its the other way round and I told him not to as he is here to study and it might burden his parent back home.I know for most international students their parent pay for money their tuition fees. During our regular chat ask him some questions just to see how compatible we are because I believe for a relationship to work there must be some form of shared views on issues like education ,family,parenting etc. His replies isn't what I expected.For e.g he gives me the ideas that I should focus more being a wife and a mother.I on my part I don't want to be tied up being at home as I'm a career woman.There are other issues like keeping pet at home which hes not so keen about but agreed cause I said I like pet.well, a little bit of differences is OK if they complement the relationship.What do you all think? |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by adeboo(f): 3:18pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
I think you should really be careful girl. Can you say what tribe he is from? Cause there are some from certain tribes who wouldnt mind but there are other tribes i know that never marry foreigners and when they do, they usually come back home and marry one of theirs. You say he is studying? Does that mean that he will be going back or is he looking to stay? You just need to let this be tested by time and dont let him rush you to do what you dont wanna do. Take your time. 2 Likes |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by mayau(f): 3:27pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@adeboo Hi Adeboo,thank you.His dad is Igbo.So that will make him too.Is that good news or bad news? |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by BekinableG(m): 3:27pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
please remember u are capable of given birth to that particular guy remind him he is making a mistake. well, it may not really be a mistake depends on what the guy know u are. he is taking u to dry cleaner by the time he dryclean u there will be no moisture left in u them u will realize your mistake by then may be u will be fifty years. 39 - 25 Huuuuuuuuuuu |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by dewaledeyi(m): 3:40pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
Mayau mail me. I'm a relationship/courtship counsellor and I don't charge no dime dewaledeyiga@yahoo.com |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by yimiton(f): 3:42pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
No, it's no good news. I doubt if any Igbo man will let his 25 year old son marry a 39 year old. Sorry, I wish it wasn't true but it is. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by ThoniaSlim(f): 3:44pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
Wait ohhhh he's even an igbo guy with igbo parents especially mother hhhmmmmmm i doubt if that guy has told his parents about you. i really doubt it. but sometimes we could be wrong with our assumptions, just be really careful. most Nigerian students here in malaysia depend on their parents for everything and some of the guys look for extra cash. the easiest way o getting the extra cash is to look for a meal ticket to deceive. they would do anything to get one including telling all sorts of lies and faking identities. but i have seen a few Nigerian-Malaysian couples. but i have not seen anyone where the guy is younger than the woman. thats why i would advice you to be careful, most of them are very deceitful. i suggest never ever give the guy money or material stuff till you are fully sure and convinced this guy maybe genuine. also tell him you wanna go on holidays with him to meet his parents and family, observe his reaction to this request. that should be able to give you your answer. and you would be able to know if truly he has told his parents about you. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by AkinCREATV(m): 3:49pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
Hey babe , remember 25 is the New 39 so what are you wait for , go get him just be mindful of one thing , whats age got to do with it, it is just a number |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by Nobody: 3:53pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
Am just not comfortable about this "woman". Something tells me we are just been taken for a ride again on this thread. so, am off |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by uspry1(f): 3:54pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
Be sure check and read this below: 10 Insights You should take steps into serious relationship before you get marry her/him[/b] https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-95533.0.html |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by mayau(f): 4:58pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@BekinableG BekinableG: I'm aware of the biological aspect of it BekinableG and thank you for the reminder. @dewaledeyi dewaledeyi: Thanks Dewaledeyiga.I sure to get in touch. @yimiton yimiton: yeah,too bad.I wish it wasn't too. @Thoniaslim ThoniaSlim: Thoniaslim you're in KL? @AkinCREATV AkinCREATV: Thanks AkinCREATV.I agree age is just a number.The thing is we want to know if hes for real. @ilugunboy ilugunboy: oh no ilugunboy,I'm not taking anyone for a ride.In fact while i'm in this forum, I'm chatting with him.Told him about the reply and ofcourse hes upset. @uspry uspry1: Thanks for the url |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by mellow(m): 5:17pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
It could also be for real so remember to use both your heart and your head. Never leave the usage of one out.[/color][color=#990000][color=#990000][/color] |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by mayau(f): 5:25pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@mellow mellow: Thank you mellow. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by rockiedink(m): 5:26pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
now i'm confused |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by mellow(m): 5:27pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
mayau: You are welcome sweetheart.[/color][color=#990000][/color][color=#990000] |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by Nobody: 5:33pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
Mayau, I'm going to be blunt here, and it's no slur on your character, I'm sure you're an attractive woman, and your feelings towards him are totally genuine. But, I don't think his feelings towards you are real, it just doesn't ring true. If you search through this forum, you'll see a number of topics concerning the age difference issue, some Nigerian men will NOT marry a lady the same age as themselves, most wouldn't marry one 35 years older, and the vast majority would certainly NOT marry one 15 years older. That's the age of a teenager. I feel sad that I have to tell you this, but it has to be said, and I can only hope you'll pay heed to what myself and others have said, concerning the negative aspects. I think he's using you, not sure if for material gain, (that could come later) but certainly for other reasons that may become clear later. I don't know enough about you to say for sure. Do you have any children, from a previous relationship? Lets assume yes, is your Yahoo! guy prepared to be a father, have a ready-made family? Some 25-year-olds can barely look after themselves, and may not be able to cater for their own biological children. The word here is CAUTION!!! |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by rockiedink(m): 5:33pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@mayau well ok lemme get serious here. you obviously love this dude. now is he in ur country studying? i mean have you confirmed that? now you say he loves you. his Dad is igbo and that means he probably won't want him to marry a non-igbo not to mention a non-Nigerian. well, i know igbos who don't give a hoot about who their kids are married to as long as they love 'emselves (sorry yimi dear) so it rally is a complicated case. bt truth is you wont know till you try. all i'll say is hope for the best and expect that worst. that way you don't get disappointed. i really wish you all the best sis. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by toyboy1(m): 6:00pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
@poster, use your head as well as ur heart. Nigerian men hardly marry ladies older than them, even if they do,the age gap in btw them is always 5 or less. We men (nigerian) are very egoistic, we want to be seen as d head, boss and all dat in a relationship. For that age gap, i smell a rotten rat. Do not commit ur self to him, and talk to him about a vist to his family in naija for familiarisation, this u must do face to face with him so as to see his reaction. i am sure he will object professing one excuse after the other, when this happens, u sure know what he wants. my 2 kobo |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by ThoniaSlim(f): 7:26pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
mayau: Yes. |
| Re: I'm 39 Hes 25 by ettehgate(m): 7:31pm On Dec 06, 2007 |
remember you are old enough to be her mother in naija that kain thin no de work well o |
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