Janet101:
@westendel
Good morning, how was ur nite ,I hope u slept ?stay strong.we love u.

Westendel:


Jane dear,am good.couldn't sleep well. Am more confused now than b4, these two people have vehemently refused to say the truth. He said he only lusted after her but never slept with her.my sister said d same thing,while there watsapp chats is saying a different thing.

who and what should I believe?

Westendel:

Jane dear,am good.couldn't sleep well. Am more confused now than b4, these two people have vehemently refused to say the truth. He said he only lusted after her but never slept with her.my sister said d same thing,while there watsapp chats is saying a different thing.
who and what should I believe?

Westendel:


Jane dear,am good.couldn't sleep well. Am more confused now than b4, these two people have vehemently refused to say the truth. He said he only lusted after her but never slept with her.my sister said d same thing,while there watsapp chats is saying a different thing.

who and what should I believe?

Westendel:
my people we just finish the meeting.A lot has happened, a lot has been said, I don't know whom to believe again. Even with the evidence is now there words against mine.

what a world!!!!

Bibol:
I'm so sorry about what you are going through but if I may ask, what exactly was the content of the chat that aroused suspicion?

Bibol:
I'm so sorry about what you are going through but if I may ask, what exactly was the content of the chat that aroused suspicion?

NairaMode:
Every other thing will fall into place soon.

No decision is actually wrong in this situation. You have to make the best decision you can live with.

Life is so worthless. Its nothing and this experience just seal my belief that life is so short yet full of troubles, ache, lies, betrayal, sin and the moments of happiness are usually so little.

THE BEST ADVICE AT THIS TIME IS TO SEPARATE FROM YOUR HUSBAND FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN TO THINK THROUGH THIS AFTER THE MEETING TOMORROW. YOU NEED TO STAY AWAY.

No one is perfect anyway. You arent as well and this could have been you.

Im not saying stay in the marriage nor divorce him but you NEED TO SEPARATE FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN TO MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE.

Good luck.

Westendel:


Jane dear,am good.couldn't sleep well. Am more confused now than b4, these two people have vehemently refused to say the truth. He said he only lusted after her but never slept with her.my sister said d same thing,while there watsapp chats is saying a different thing.

who and what should I believe?

Bibol:
I'm so sorry about what you are going through but if I may ask, what exactly was the content of the chat that aroused suspicion?

Westendel:


I would have uploaded their watsapp chats here but because I don't want expose his identity, I would rather tell us the content here.

my sister: why don't you wanna send me the 10,000naira?

my husband: I asked you to come over u refused

my sister: I want us to stop this sex of a thing. I feel bad doing dis with you,knowing well that you are my brother in law

my husband: is better I do it with you,than doing it with an asider.

let me stop here don't want to any further. people, what do you make of this conversation?

Westendel:


I would have uploaded their watsapp chats here but because I don't want expose his identity, I would rather tell us the content here.

my sister: why don't you wanna send me the 10,000naira?

my husband: I asked you to come over u refused

my sister: I want us to stop this sex of a thing. I feel bad doing dis with you,knowing well that you are my brother in law

my husband: is better I do it with you,than doing it with an asider.what's wrong if you have a child for your sister?


let me stop here don't want to any further. people, what do you make of this conversation?

Westendel:


I would have uploaded their watsapp chats here but because I don't want expose his identity, I would rather tell us the content here.

my sister: why don't you wanna send me the 10,000naira?

my husband: I asked you to come over u refused

my sister: I want us to stop this sex of a thing. I feel bad doing dis with you,knowing well that you are my brother in law

my husband: is better I do it with you,than doing it with an asider.what's wrong if you have a child for your sister?


let me stop here don't want to any further. people, what do you make of this conversation?

Westendel:


I would have uploaded their watsapp chats here but because I don't want expose his identity, I would rather tell us the content here.

my sister: why don't you wanna send me the 10,000naira?

my husband: I asked you to come over u refused

my sister: I want us to stop this sex of a thing. I feel bad doing dis with you,knowing well that you are my brother in law

my husband: is better I do it with you,than doing it with an asider.what's wrong if you have a child for your sister?


let me stop here don't want to any further. people, what do you make of this conversation?

olu4life:
with that chat?! Lobatan!!! Its clear he is highly desperate for a child. Well, me I go mute for this level. All I know is that i've witnessed worst cases than this. Lemme tell a short one.

A couple has been married for close to 20yrs with no child only for the man to impregnate a church member. Plus this man happens to be a Pastor o. The wife learnt of it after the lady gave birth. Hell was let loose. She was about moving out and clearly confused just as u were. After much advise and consultation from family and friends, the wife took in the baby but NEVER took in the lady. The hubby agreed to the decision. Now from the way I looked at the case, the hubby have always had concern for the woman from the onset. And after the whole drama, he was very remorseful which made the woman think again. They are living happily now and no form of issue except trivial stuff.

Westendel:
my people we just finish the meeting.A lot has happened, a lot has been said, I don't know whom to believe again. Even with the evidence is now there words against mine.

what a world!!!!

Phema:


And you know this how?

MarineOne:

Please fight for your home. It will take time but fight for you home. You need a lot of calmness at this time. You must be ready to forgive and be wise in dealing with hubby

olu4life:
with that chat?! Lobatan!!! Its clear he is highly desperate for a child. Well, me I go mute for this level. All I know is that i've witnessed worst cases than this. Lemme tell a short one.

A couple has been married for close to 20yrs with no child only for the man to impregnate a church member. Plus this man happens to be a Pastor o. The wife learnt of it after the lady gave birth. Hell was let loose. She was about moving out and clearly confused just as u were. After much advise and consultation from family and friends, the wife took in the baby but NEVER took in the lady. The hubby agreed to the decision. Now from the way I looked at the case, the hubby have always had concern for the woman from the onset. And after the whole drama, he was very remorseful which made the woman think again. They are living happily now and no form of issue except trivial stuff.

Point is, its yet to get to that stage in ur own palava, thank God u discovered on time.

Now my question to u OP, how much does ur hubby love u?
Is he remorseful over the act?
Has he apologised despite all what had happened to u?
I know its been few hours after the family meeting buut what move has ur hubby made?
If all the answers to my questions above is negative, then move on but if positive, my dear I know u are so angry and all, give him some space for possibly weeks to fully recover then take ur judgement. DONT DARE MAKE A MOVE WHEN U ARE ANGRY. We all know the consequence of that. Ponder on these have said. Thank u

As for ur sister, I care less about her. She should pack her bags and leave the house. Simple!!!

olu4life:
100% Its not story of someone told me or someone distant. Its over 4yrs it happened

successinlife:
What is the truth?can we face reality?

In as much as it is very hard,this type of thing happens day in day out in this our modern world.it should be under 5% of divorced women that will find it possible to remarry.Hey,there is no saint these days men and women alike.If people tell you to divorce will they provide an angel of a man? Sincerely speaking,it might be a test for your breakthrough,what is if divorce is what the enemy want for either of the couples?
My take on this issue is prudence and God's direction.Someone can make mistake today and be good tomorrow and likewise somebody can be good today and be bad tomorrow.God direction is the best way forward.Let the situation die a natural death,don't insist to find out the truth in a hurry cause it may be hard instead take it gently with your man,i tell you if you want to tame or make your man to confess you can do it.God has given the women powers with diligence to unearth the very truth from men's mouth.You will laugh at the end no need to put yourself in a bad state. Cheers

Phema:


All you can say is "they look happy" as only the couple know if they are really happy or not.

For all you know, it might just be a case of "the more you look, the less you see".

successinlife:
Hello my Sister,

The situation you are calls for divine intervention. My advise is that you go on your knees and cry to God to lead you. Return to your husband house after work,do not ask any of the two any question. Talk to your sister and your husband,prepare food and behave normal.

1. Watch events as it will unfold in front of you.

2. There is nothing anybody will tell you that will replace your sister and your husband for now.

3. I know your husband & sister will either brake down or be arrogant.

The real decision will come in the night, let your sister be asleep and tell your husband you have reported the case at the Police station,that you inform the authorities to hold both of them responsible should anything happen to you. Then be confident enough to tell him this. '' with the love i have shown you. With all my sacrifice to keep out marriage as a born again christian.Why did you submit yourself to the devil?

Tell us what he will vomit as explanation tomorrow.

Note- No human being is God to judge this case.May God see you through. (amen)

olu4life:

Dear, we all dont have same grace of forgiven people. Some might not be able to forgive and forget but some actually do. Lemme quote dis proverb "No matter how much one hide a smoke, it will still find its way out". Its easier to fish out one that is pretending to act as if all is well. And like I said, its over 4years, that should be enough clarity to know she has gotten over it cos of her kind of person that I know very well. Surely it wont be easy at first but not her first time adopting children.

Lets not derail the thread, hope u get d drift?

olu4life:


100% Its not story of someone told me or someone distant. Its over 4yrs it happened


#GBAM... How can fellow women be advising divorce at this stage. Do u expect marriage to be a fairy tale? Expecting everything to go smoothly? Whats happens to conquering the storm? So even if the husband cheated, and so f***ing what! Next is divorce?

OP ask these women advising u if they have not had close experience in theirs before. Some will just be vocal online, meanwhile they are like slaves in their home only trying to console themselves. Enough of the hypocrisy in this section. U better dont let faceless entities ruin ur marriage. Check deep within u, u know the prompt response but just waiting for advise to suit urself. Sorry for been harsh but truth be told, u need tto takee charge of ur home. Divorce is only allowed when all trials is in vain. So if u leave ur house, what next? Remarry? And face same Challenge?! Woman get up, dust urself and TAKE CONTROL OF UR ZONE

And if any of u so called advisers feel insulted, feel free to lace the shoe.

Westendel:


Jane dear,am good.couldn't sleep well. Am more confused now than b4, these two people have vehemently refused to say the truth. He said he only lusted after her but never slept with her.my sister said d same thing,while there watsapp chats is saying a different thing.

who and what should I believe?

Kimoni:


Olu, can I ask you 2 simple questions.

Are you married?

If your wife whom you love and trust so much cheated on you severally with your own blood brother, what will you do? Fight for her love all over again?

Sincerely, answer these questions.


There is a thread that got to FP yesterday where the guy said he forgave his wife for cheating on him for 5 years with a younger person and I did not find one guy that supported this act, instead, they were all insulting him for daring to forgive a cheating wife. And a lady that "mistakenly" asked if he truly saw the chats proving the infidelity got dragged all over the thread.

Now, back to the question, why should forgiveness only lie with the woman and never with the man? Because women don't get hurt or they probably don't have blood flowing in their veins

Only a man is allowed to start divorce proceedings? But with a woman, it's a taboo??

And any woman advising it must be a hypocrite?? But when men advise divorce to a cheating partner, it's okay?

Please show me exactly where the hypocrisy is coming from.