summerflame:
How I wish I have a gun. When will you sluts stop acting infidelity with married men?..
Stop destroying another people's home. Life is a karma

MzRoyalHighness:
"I'm In Love With A Married Man"
and you no shame to talk am

innervoice:


For now his wife is the second fiddle.

VICTORIA91:


Walahi, My bended head has started to be straightened with all this abuse,,,haba Nairalander anyways i appreciate you for your advise.U have really talked to me like a sister and i really wish my other 'roasters'congrat in advance....they have waited late overdue.

Toks2008:



Young lady you have no reason to castigate yourself alright...

You followed your heart and while i have always advised against initial gragra and asking people to be more cautious, i still believe that in this case the man played you by not telling you on time before you fell sheepishly for him.

Having said that,the choice is now yours. Many people will call for my head for this advice im about to give you and i do not care because many people are good at throwing words of advice without really looking deep into the situation.

You are a woman and ladies will fall for any man who can really melt their hearts in any way they believe is ok by them.Polygamy is not a sin and i have never seen a place in the bible that condemns it except an advice that as deacons and workers in GOD's vineyard we should be husband of one wife but there is never a place in the bible that condemns polygamy nevertheless i will not advice you to go into that union due to complexity and especially when you are still young because if you were in your late 30s i would have asked you to give it a shot if you are ok being the second wife and will not in anyway cry when the complexities begin to rear its head.

Nevertheless young lady, if you believe you are deeply in love and he is what you need whether because he is cute or rich or for whatever reason(But i can bet you will never fall in love with a broke married man) please go ahead and become a second wife if that is what rocks your boat.

As i have written before, should you decide to go ahead please do and follow your heart but be prepared for the complexities which could cost you your life if the first wife goes desperately diabolic or the man may go ahead and do same thing with you with a third lady so weigh the options before you make up your mind putting into consideration your heart desires.

ted1741:
Since you said abuse is allowed, I will go straight to it. You claim that you are not materialistic yet you shout aloud how "loaded" this man is, that makes you a materialistic girl my dear. You also said he was willing to settle you in another state and it seems you are also thinking about that option. He is able to settle you because he can afford to, again, a materialistic mind. He took you out of the shores of the country and you jumped for it. How is it that you have a good job, can afford these things and yet, extremely excited at the opportunities and doing all these things with a man you barely knew, someone you met online. You were blinded by the material things he is giving and so, failed to ask the basic questions good girls ask. It took you a while to know he is married because you never asked and you never asked because you were materialistic. How difficult is this for you to comprehend. Most girls ask right off the bat, are you married, do you have kids etc. Am sure there were times when you called and he didn't pick your calls because he was with his family. If you asked and he lied, how does that make him your dream man. He is your dream man becos he has money period. The only reason you're considering the idea of becoming his second wife is he is loaded according to you. You even belief he was forced to marry, lol, you are extremely naive and gullible young woman. Go and marry him and be prepared for a life of chaos, battle, name calling, headaches, regrets, a useless life. If you want to know whether he was forced to marry this woman, give her a call, chat her up. He is decent according to you, yet he wants to get you pregnant and jet out of the country. He took you out of the country and sampled you day in day out and hid such fundamental information of his background from you, yet you call him decent. Decent my foot. Arent you ashamed to call a con man decent. Some nigerian girls and money; you will never cease to amuse and amaze me. I say some because there are a lot of decent, good, God fearing Nigerian girls out there who will never compromise their principles and sociatla norms and values. Ask your mr. right to go and see your parents and ask for your hand in marriage and watch his reaction. Are you demented? By the way, if this man was poor, not loaded, will you be considering this marriage. If he really loves and wants to marry you, why the thought of sending you to a different state instead of keeping you in his family home so that you can bond with his other wife and children and your children bond with their siblings. Do you actually have such a low self esteem that you are willing to go on "exile" for a decent man. I wish I was near you, boil 360 degrees hot water, pour it and wake up your retarded brian from stupor, useless girl. Don't you feel bad that this man actually is using you for sexual satisfaction? Why do you believe his mumbo jumbo and cheap talks. You should be angry with him for hiding issues of his background from you just to get in between your legs
instead of talking of been loaded.

franciskaine:
in brief you nailed it.

freecocoa:
is this advice not supposed to be for the married men who won't keep their wows? You have to understand that some ladies don't care if a man is married or not.

Iamthoney:
U deserve an all expense paid trip to Dubai... jez say yes and see me foot the bill

Ab025:
There is nothing to be confused about

Sleeping with a married man is not ideal but you can also decide to marry him as his second wife, at least that's not a crime.

#Ur choice

freecocoa:
She didn't know he was married when they started dating, did she? This lady is very stup1d in my opinion but you can't say for sure that she didn't really like the guy for who he is, before the discovery.

VICTORIA91:


Walahi, My bended head has started to be straightened with all this abuse,,,haba Nairalander anyways i appreciate you for your advise.U have really talked to me like a sister and i really wish my other 'roasters'congrat in advance....they have waited late overdue.

VICTORIA91:
Dear NL,

I'm 25 years old, I met this guy online via chatting and before i knew, we met and we fell deeply in love.This guy is irresistible when we met and i never prayed for something more, because he was so caring, lovely and loving, not only that he is so tall and handsome as i have always prayed for. After a month we knew each other better and every minute i rang him up, he later told me and revealed to me everything about him, because he is not the flamboyant type of guy, i hardly notice that he is loaded.

At age 33 he has a lot of properties and work with a Ministry in Lagos, seconded employment with one int'l institution, he got me int'l passport and took me out of Nigeria shore for the first time in my life. I am from an average family and I'm not easily moved with material things, I'm a working class lady earning moderate salary and living well, i had a relationship before him but not a stable one.

He later revealed to me that he has something to tell me that might tear us apart, i made up my mind since it would not lead to my death, i bet i have reached my bus stop, because he is also in love with me. What a perfect match!. Until the day he bursted it out that he is married with kids and he was sweating and breathing so restlessly, waiting for me to breakup with him, i reassured him i will still love him at that, he explained he impregnated the girl and his family forced him to marry the girl...in short, three kids, two boys and a girl from the woman,(first boy and a twins).

I almost fainted, but pretended as if all is well, at least he still managed to tell me to let me decide to continue or not. We both continued and this month make our 6th month and he is already talking about our marriage, he tried divorcing the first wife, but get warned to let her be to make peace reign, i noticed he loves me so much and also loves his children too well too. He is traveling out soon to study for his PH.D. He wants me to get pregnant for him and do the needful with my family and declare his intentions of taking me as his second wife to his first wife and family...But at this stage i have doubting mind maybe i'm ready to go on or not..i don't feel like ruining the woman's home, and i don't feel like losing this my sweet love, he is not forcing me and he wants me to decide for myself....

Please help me dearies, abuse are allowed at least maybe it will straighten my brain..but i sincerely love him, he promised to settle me down in another state and assured me that all will be well.The issue is i'm so CONFUSED.

MrsChima:


Just because polygamy isn't a crime in Nigeria...does it make it right?

So4baba:

You ve nt seen anywhere in the bible where it is written because you dnt even have a bible talk less of reading it... Pls dnt use the Bible in supporting immorality..

eDDiebz0147:
Dear NL

Please I need all the advice I can get. I have been in a relationship for 2 years so I thought until I began noticing things that love had blinded me off about my Gf. We met in Ghana and we have been cohabitation all this while but neither does any body in her family is aware of this. To the point that when any of her friends from North or Nigeria comes visiting she tells them I got her the apartment. Recently I caught her cheating on me with a guy she claimed she met on fbook, but after serious probing she confess to having sex with an ex lover in one of her trip to Nigeria. When I confront her why she would do that she claims it's all my fault that I cheated and she did too. She has no remorse.. She claimed if I forgave her she would remain loyal. And I did but I kept suspecting and behold in my absence she travel to Nigeria again and denied. I got so furious and took her things off the house to a friend she claim was her sister. Now she is making me feel like a wicked guy for doing that.. I don't wish to denial anyone shelter especially in a position where am capable of but if she ain't trust worthy and honest do you think it be wise to keep her As at the time I am dropping this post not one of her relatives aware of our relationship over the past 2 years if I confront her on this she becomes very combatant.. She claims she loves me thats why she is still with me but I think it's because she is benefiting from me especially through the accommodation because at first when I threatened her to move she made a bold statement that one's she leaves it's over. It was only a few weeks ago I even discovered she was a lot older than me.. Funny thing is I still love her makes me much more confused.. Advice please

MrsPhyno:

Help me ask them o abeg

Sabrwahaqqo come and learn
Anuofia & Onye Nzuzu, just go and meet any Igbo boy that's close to you and call him that. He'll show u the meaning