Thanks

Dinakas:
From all you've said, I didn't see where you said you guys talked deeply about the problem. Sometimes, problems of relationship is misunderstanding and miscommunication. What if you guys can save the relationship? It's 3yrs. Sometimes we look for spark and all, it's good o, but don't forget one would get married. What if after 3years of marriage things are going somehow, would divorce be the answer? Marriage is a lifetime and within that period, so many things we didn't expect show themselves.

I'm not saying you shouldn't break up, I'm just saying think about it, can it be resolved? Can something better happen? Can it work? Whatever you decide, you can go ahead with whatever it is.

long story.... Just free the girl mbok!

adonbilivit:
tell her u have repented and cant fornicate anymore coz its end time.

dovetark:
Thanks, Very helpful... Hard truth.

Speaking from personal experience, myself. It no b beans, but you can't hold on to someone by force, pushes them away even more.

Coz you just feel like your trapped, can't breathe, feel like your losing your mind, not happy.

Plus you can't go back to what use to be, that point in time gone.

lol, thanks

8unit:


have se.x with her without cond.om. Cum inside her. Look straight into her eyes, slap her, ask her "why is our feeling dying?" if she wanna say a word, shut her the fuc.k up with a kiss. You're meant to be together.

Sweetyie:
op dnt end it na, u guyz shud go 4 a holiday or trip

with your money abi

You think say na three them dey plug money abiabi

Thanks, helpful.

DrIloekwe2020:
my brother if u are sure she is not what you want u can end the friendship by applying the following
1,stop seeing her
2,stop calling her
3,stop picking her calls
4,pray about it.
5,call her and let her know is over.

Tell Her how you feel man, that you can no longer continue. It's better you end it now. But if you still feel something for her, maybe you should go on a cruise, have some fun. And if there is no improvement after that, end it ASAP.

dovetark:


Lol, this would take too much energy from me. I am mostly a one woman man.

Try this trick!

kennyman2000:
Hmmmmm... You or your girl should relocate and sieze all contacts with eachother. If that's done for like 5 months. The feelings you've for one another ought to vanish..

Bro I can tell you from my experience it's not that easy. Their is always that crazy person who will always has your heart, no matter how hard you try to forget him/her.

Lol That's her decision, but she won't do that, she will only be amazed and read all the comments with rapt attention.

limdude:
Brother, if ur girl in a nairalander I'm utterly sure that if she sees this you posted she'll definitely be person who breaks up with you.....

Thanks, Helpful.

OBSEQUIOUS:
Op, why are you thinking ending what seem blissful is the solution? From all indications, if you get her heart back to it, I think you can make the world jealous!

Ladies don't give in to break up easily, it shows she still have a thing for you, if not it would be long gone. That be the case, give it a considerate effort to make it work.

Never say never, if that doesn't work, sure it would work sef. No need for plan B.

MAKE IT WORK!

But when I did that, mine said we will work it out

ayowole21:
well bro...I was once in your shoes.... and what I did was to call her and tell her I want out...I poured my heart out to her and she understands.... though it was painful but that's what I want... so go for it bro

Thanks helpful, but wish you could follow the full story.

NellyGhenghen:
How you want to end a relationship just like that, after three years. Why didn't u end it long time ago? So basically uve just wasted three years of your life?

People need to know what they want before going Into LTR. LTR should be with someone you intend to marry and you need to make sure that person is someone you can actually spend the rest of your life with first before even starting anything.

Op it sounds more like you are the one who is tired and wants to break up otherwise you won't be asking how. Met someone else maybe? anyway if she doesn't entice you anymore save the poor girl further stress and break if off with her like a man. You didn't need advice on how to toast her nor how to Bleep her, do this same way you did those.

dovetark:


Lol, no matter how serious a situation is, when humor is thrown at me, I can't help but laugh... which I am doing right now. but at the end of the day bro, the problem won't be solved. So you can share an experience on how you ended a relationship with a girl before and I can learn from it. I haven't formally initiated a break up before and that is why I ask.

Same goes to you @Pennah

I have to take this time out to thank every one who has contributed in one way or the other to this post. I have read through all the comments so far and they've been very helpful. I used to make her read Nairaland a lot then and probably she may stumble into this, she may relate but might not be able to figure out its me. I wish I could tell her "we made Front Page" but its a serious matter. To every one out there... communication is very key in every relationship; be it friendship or one that is intimate. I have been overwhelmed by your response and I think Nairaland has a lot of relationship dr's... Thank you once again Family...

I broke up with her via whatsapp. It worked. Now she hates me.

Thanks, helpful.

missyadorable:

You are not ready and determined to end the relationship
If you are,it only takes barring her numbers/changing your sim card,delete everything concerning her from your life n stop seeing her but obviously you aren't bold enough for that.

dovetark:
We've dated officially for over 3 years, I have to admit she's a nice girl when her heart is in it, but certain events have occurred which has left a once blissful relationship sour. Prior to the series of events that have brought us to this point, I used to feel like a superhuman with her in my life (for real I could do anything I set my mind to do and succeed), but all that has changed... Life happened!!! We've both been hit by series of events that have adjusted our perspective on how we view life which has undoubtedly affected us. Since the beginning of this year, we've been on a free fall with our emotions. We've not had intense quarrels neither have we had intense passion being together of late (I admit, they both spice up a relationship) and we have grossly neglected each others feelings. We both played our roles in getting to where we are now, I feel the door closing in fast on us and I can't stand this flip-flop of emotions involved.

We've tried taking a break and that didn't work, I have suggested severally that we just remain friends and end the relationship but I really don't know why she doesn't agree to that. We can't just stand each others bullshit anymore but still a part of us wants it to go back to how it used to be I guess that's the reason we've been hanging on.

I am not here to cry over spilled milk, rather, I am here to seek advice on how I would successful end this relationship without it having profound effects on my psychology and emotions while maintaining optimum productivity as an individual. Please your comments are needed and appreciated. Thank you Nairaland.

Please don't just read, I need your suggestions.

Endtime

Thank you very much, helpful.

damola1:


You are killing yourself, when you don't break up. Time is precious, if you are not happy for a long time in a relationship just break it off. Life is fun. Try to have fun... It's best to simply enjoy it with someone you are comfortable with. The search continues if one fails. No decision is ever perfect, improve yourself, make more money to attract more prospect, be confident, and be alive all the time.

Men need to be more firm or simply run away. I am talking from a person experience. Time flies away, and later, they'll just blame you for everything.

I bet you most men that are married to women are not supposed to be.

Adanna28:
I think you've been "over it" for awhile now, tried the best you can.

Best to be firm with her, cut ties and end it, since she trying to force you to be with her, it no longer love but desperation and control.

You will keep going through circles till you get to the point you despise n loathe her. She not your wife, you owe her nothing.

I'm sure you tried being gentle with trying to cut ties but she not listening. Be firm and honest, if she continues pleading/begging just walk out.

You got to be cruel to be kind at times, later on she will understand, it was best for the long run.

untill a man date you for 7yrs without putting a ring on your hand, and that's when you will remember that bolded statement

Bro, I advise u to take things back 2 status quo, no one is perfect even you. What u feel 4 her is genuine love and don't try to fight it. Am happily married and @ a point in my courtship I had similar issue. If she doesn't cheat on you, or fight with you then give your relationship a second chance and don't be a quitter. Work things out my guy, there's no perfect woman out there even my wife has her own flaws, but marriage / relationship is there to be enjoyed. Am sure u can fix it. Be a man and don't chicken out. Take care

lol

sonofananimal:
bros! She didn't nag you,

She didn't ask you for money or not the money type, she didn't cheat on you, she is nice and so on.

But why did you want to break up with her

Let me guess! Sex right you are looking for a new BOO BS and ass right

Good luck but if that GIRL swear for you heh!

lol

ZuzuMan:
...OK Try This Trick!

### BreakupDuringNnyashiiinng ###

crossed my mind. possible

bulldoza:

She's cheating on your.... 100% sure

thanks

tommychow:
LISTEN OP, I personally advice you start seeing someone else...or even more (as in, date ). Usually the main reason people find it hard to break up from an even bad relationship is FEAR OF LONELINESS. A part of you two doesn't wanna start from the scratch again. You keep telling yourself "but we've come this far". I advice you to become very social with other girls because you can't just tell yourself "there are many fishes in the sea". That won't do much. You have to make yourself know FOR A FACT there are other babes.

Good luck.

True

Adanna28:


Speaking from personal experience, myself. It no b beans, but you can't hold on to someone by force, pushes them away even more.

Coz you just feel like your trapped, can't breathe, feel like your losing your mind, not happy.

Plus you can't go back to what use to be, that point in time gone.

Thanks

Keky:
Tell Her how you feel man, that you can no longer continue. It's better you end it now. But if you still feel something for her, maybe you should go on a cruise, have some fun. And if there is no improvement after that, end it ASAP.

Thanks all, I read all the comments to this point its been helpful... I have to go and attend to some other business now. it was a nice time I had with you guys.

sonofananimal:
untill a man date you for 7yrs without putting a ring on your hand, and that's when you will remember that bolded statement

You must think I'm a school girl to say that to me Lol, I'm 29 with a happy home. You should be more concerned about yourself.

Oga move on. You don't need a relationship that lacks happiness. You will end regretting. Forget love. Understanding matters. True love will manifest itself later in life.

If you can date someone for 3 years and still find yourself at this melancholic stage then I doubt such relationship would ever lead to marriage. Being in a relationship with a woman requires great maturity and ability to think before acting. Sometimes words might not match actions and actions might not match your words and this can cause friction. From your write up it is clear that you are not ready to let her go, it is clear that you are still longing for the feelings of years past but my brother this is selfishness! Deep within you, you know what you are doing, you don't need any advice from us, you are just looking for a confirmation of what you know already deep within your heart. Now to the main point of your write up, you want to know how to break up with her for good? This is simple, use technology, don't give her a chance to see you face to face, block all social media contact and call her to let her know it's over. It might hurt her for a while but as time goes on she'll realize what a huge favor you've done for her. See my brother don't look at it as a break up, look at it as if you are releasing her so she can meet the guy she was truly meant to be with!

Adanna28:


You must think I'm a school girl to say that to me Lol, I'm 29 with a happy home. You should be more concerned about yourself.

lol and who did you think I'm am

Your statement is wack! You don't say that cos you have a happy home doesn't mean every woman is desperate.

How many years did your man date you before he put that ring on your fat looking hand

Lasgidy1:
If I were u, I'll commit murder and commit suicide, in that case, no winner, no vanquished!
Anyways, today's my bday. Me and shalewa go f_ck ourselves until there's nothing left of us

I pity ur mumu head,no b dat ogbanje sHALewa gal again?u dey go exile b dat