really funny

haa, dts reli funni

A man and his family went to the village to celebrate xmas. On xmas day the man ask his son to bring one fat goat and a knife to kill the goat. As obident son he is he went and did as his father instructed him. His father has this kind of eye called (4.30) The father took the knife and ask his son to hold the goat at the other end so that he can cut the goat but because he has 4.30 eyes he pointed the knife toward the son rather on the goat his son screamed in a loud voice dad I am not the goat I am your humble son please point the knife to the goat rather than towards your son. Ha Ha ha ha ha !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Teacher: Dele what is your favorite flower?

Dele: Chrysantomanus

Teacher: Spell it please

Dele: Actually I think I like roses better.

do we know chrysatomanus in 9ja?

olodo

no for real, i nor know, u know?

Ask me again

and again

and again

. . . . . . . . . .

. . . . .

Hi mykali, i'm just upwardly mobile. . . you?

just downwardly mobile, I guess

where have u been

i miss u somehow

who woke this thread

as if you dont know, you grandma of course

as in lysaa

Lysaa che karamin danga?

Woman who traveled to Nigeria to marry a man she met on the Internet has been sentenced

A woman who left her five children alone and traveled to Nigeria to marry a man she met on the Internet has been sentenced to five years probation. She must also take parenting classes and complete 150 hours of community service and would go to jail for up to two years if she violates her probation.

The probation plan also requires that she has a job and a home that is clean and safe by July before she can get her five children back.

Her attorney said "I think it's the best resolution to a difficult situation. I'm happy about it,"

She is appealing her convictions for child abandonment and endangerment

Her children aged 1, 7, 8, 9, 15 and 16 were found living alone in the home in very poor conditions.

During her trial, the woman said that she left food and a food card, but authorities said the card had no money on it. She also said she had expected her sister to care for the children while she went to Nigeria but her sister did not make the trip to Houston.


Source: Ngex

A flight from London to Kano develops faults in
Nigerian airspace.
Very worried the captain calls the Aminu Kano airport.

"Aminu kano airport this is captain smith reporting
flight 007"
"Do you copy?"
Kano tower; - "yes Alhaji Smith we kofi"
British Airways "Flight 007 Reporting technical
faults"
Kano tower; - "kai haba!"
British Airways; - "sorry tower couldnt get that"
Kano tower; - "okay plight 00Seben kan you tune fawa
in injin?"
British Airways; - "Negative power in engines dead"
Kano tower;- "Walahi?"
British Airways; - "Negative didnt copy"
Kano Tower;- "Kan u kom down to altitude twenty
thousand pit?"
British Airways; - "negative tower, wings wont
respond"
Kano tower; - "kai!"
British Airways; - "negative didnt copy that tower"
Kano Tower; - "okay d flane will kom down in som time
due to low injin =
fawa, ofun yo taya at altidute sis thousan fit, due
1st sebenty digri"
British Airways; - "Negative, can't activate the
landing gear"
Kano tower;- 'wayyo!'
British Airways; - "awaiting order, flight 007"
Kano Towers;- "okay refit apta me"
British Airways; - "okay what?"
Kano Tower; - "ASHADU ANLA ILAHA ILLALAHU, WA ASHADU
ANNA MUHAMMADAN RASULULLAHI! (Prayer for the
dead!)

@ seun, am still dying from laugh. LMFAO, my rib carge hurts so bad

serves u right

and serves u left

go bak 2 bed

yeah no mind am

u don wash d plates inside kitchen

Kiss and Slap

President Olusegun Obasanjo, Governor Orji Uzo Kalu (Gov. of Abia), the former Miss World, Agbani Darego and Former Aviation Minister Kema Chikwe are sitting in a train going through a dark tunnel. Suddenly, there is this kissing sound and then a slap!!!

The train comes out of the tunnel into daylight. The women and Orji Uzo Kalu are sitting there looking perplexed, b'cos everyone heard the slap, but nobody was sure where it came from. Obasanjo is bent over, holding his face which is red from the slap. All of them remain diplomatically quiet and nobody says anything, least of all, sorry!

Chikwe is thinking: "Nigerian men are all crazy and even these ones here are all lusting after Agbani. Obasanjo must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. It is quite proper that she slapped him."

Agbani is thinking: "Mr President must have moved to kiss me, and got slapped, but by whom?"

Obasanjo is thinking: "Damn it, Orji must have tried to kiss Agbani, she thought it was me and slapped me, but could this little girl do such a thing without fear?"

Kalu is thinking: "If this train goes through another dark tunnel I could make another kissing sound and slap Obasanjo again."

Dbanj and Don jazy were comming from a show in the middle of the night and the met policemen on their way

policeman: where are u comming from at this time of the night

Dbang: Am Dbanj no long thing

Policeman:Coporal!

coporal: sir

Policeman: coporal get me the long koboko i say the long one.He says he needs d long one

as soon coporal brings the koboko Djang was whipped 6 hot lashes then he shouted

"AM DBANJ NO SHOT THING IS DON JAZZY AGAIN" as Don Jazzy heared his name seeing Dbanj in pain he quickly replied

"MOGBONO FELE FELE NO CALL MY NAME FOR HERE OH,

u try