hardbody: If you cannot take decisions without my say so, if you cannot step into my shoes when i am not available, if you cannot carry yourself in a proud way and represent my ego, i have no business with you. Take decisions and make mistakes, i will understand, stay dormant and do nothing, i will chastise you.

1 million likes for this post.hardboy thank you for this

WOW. That's my man showing confidence just the way I expected. It is well with you.

Odenigbo Aroli.:


I am even more worried about you, I feel serious pity for you and your warped reasoning that tends to make wrong things to be right. Your type will be walking into trouble most often due to your seriously damaged psyche and fake lifestyle. Sorry but I dont think you own problem has any solution. I advice you to wake up after midnight, walk into the nearest bush behind your house with a strong rope and do humanity a favour by hanging yourself. The world will be better without your self righteous hypocrites. Idont mean to annoy you, just being honest with you and telling you some home truths.

Women ALWAYS forget that EVERY man has that GOD-given EGO (not a bad thing, God gave it to them)and yes a confident woman is a better wife than the timid one but that confidence must come with humility to make a stable home; otherwise your home will be hell on earth. WHY? because a confident arrogant/proud woman + the Ego of the man is like being in a microwave.
Note, the Ego of the man is constant, rich or poor, it is there, we cannot wish it away maybe with jazz...LOL... but only for a while. The woman must LEARN to live with it. HOW..by being a CONFIDENT HUMBLE woman.

Common, Confident humble women, let's kill these men with humility. It works; dont be stupid or timid but be confident and humble. It keeps that EGO in check without them knowing!

anitank: A real man (Nigerian or not) will always want a confident woman as a partner.
Only men with low self esteem and zero I.Q run away from confident women for fear of intimidation

Nailed it!!

kulyie: exactly.this is my kind of man.a man that i can be confident around,make mistakes and i know he will correct me as opposed to a man that expects me to be vibrating and getting hypertensive when he is around.if men like this were all over nigeria,the divorce rate will drop

A lot of such men abound in this very country. (Make no mistake about that). If women buy into the generalization that all Nigerian men are monsters, then they put up unnecessary defenses and set their confrontational hormones on hair-trigger alert. .......and then Newton's 3rd law of motion steps in to ruin everything.

ayodeji752: av said it,u are drunk!are u d waiter in d hotel?wot does haircut has to do with confidence?go home!

as in.....the guy's post just made me laugh,i almost poured the glass of water on the table while laughing.gnash their teeths indeed chai! Nairaland get commedians o

caesaraba:

A lot of such men abound in this very country. (Make no mistake about that). If women buy into the generalization that all Nigerian men are monsters, then they put up unnecessary defenses and set their confrontational hormones on hair-trigger alert. .......and then Newton's 3rd law of motion steps in to ruin everything.

well you are right but its because of the bad impression and stories all around about the 'exploits' naija men are doing,thats why women are putting up their defenses plus nollywood homevideos too are not helping matters.they always portray nigerian men as one horrible,selfish monster and an egocentric freak

kulyie: abi o.i wonder the way some men think sef.so if a woman cannot be free and confident around her husand or in her home,where else will she be.confidence has a way of bringing about freedom.i will take myself as an example,i am confident when i am at home with my father,so does it mean that because i am confident with my father i disrespect him.my father can dress and i will tell him daddy go and change your outfit na,the colour doesnt match or it doesnt look good on you,whenever he changes it i say ehen,thats my daddy,i am proud of you.so does that make me disrespectful and ill mannered as opposed to when i see something wrong about my parents outfit i cannot correct them in respect and love.infact sometimes my dad wears his cap facing the front and i turn it to the side,like ha daddy dont you want people to be saying my daddy looks like a twenty something year old boy and i respectfully adjust his cap,does that make me saucy as opposed to the fact that i wont have the effontery to look at my father in the face talkless of adjusting his cap or spraying perfume for him

Thank you oo my brother your nigerian brothers here think confidence equates to being disrespectful, it seems they want a piece of meat as a wife.. i don taya self!!

dbride: Women ALWAYS forget that EVERY man has that GOD-given EGO (not a bad thing, God gave it to them)and yes a confident woman is a better wife than the timid one but that confidence must come with humility to make a stable home; otherwise your home will be hell on earth. WHY? because a confident arrogant/proud woman + the Ego of the man is like being in a microwave.
Note, the Ego of the man is constant, rich or poor, it is there, we cannot wish it away maybe with jazz...LOL... but only for a while. The woman must LEARN to live with it. HOW..by being a CONFIDENT HUMBLE woman.

Common, Confident humble women, let's kill these men with humility. It works; dont be stupid or timid but be confident and humble. It keeps that EGO in check without them knowing!

that's right.you nailed it perfectly

For you to be able to attract the right kind of man, you have to work on yourself. Love yourself first before you love anybody else.

Odenigbo Aroli.:


So, are you telling us those qualities listed up there are for proud women and not for confident women?

Is that what my post implies? the qualities that you personally have described denote the qualities of a proud woman and not a confident one, reason why we've had this argument in the first place.

speaking to some of you is like talking to a brick wall.

huni_naija:

Thank you oo my brother your nigerian brothers here think confidence equates to being disrespectful, it seems they want a piece of meat as a wife.. i don taya self!!

i am a lady,not a man lol

.

obowunmi: For you to be able to attract the right kind of man, you have to work on yourself. Love yourself first before you love anybody else.

that's right

kulyie: please what is the opposite of confidence?is it not timidity?since confident women dont attract you then i suppose the opposite will attract you plus i understand your post perfectly.so its either you are confident or not

Most people, including you, dont take time to read a post, understand it before giving it a reply. I talked about confidence + arrogance = time bomb; confidence + humility = Gift of God, priceless, jackpot.
KULYIE, what then informed your statement that confident women do not attract me? I understand that the art of comprehension is sometimes difficult for some people, but take time to read and then reply.

kulyie: i am a lady,not a man lol

sorry oo my sister lol.. *noted*

kulyie: well you are right but its because of the bad impression and stories all around about the 'exploits' naija men are doing,thats why women are putting up their defenses plus nollywood homevideos too are not helping matters.they always portray nigerian men as one horrible,selfish monster and an egocentric freak

It's true that a lot of 9ja men have lagged behind in this dept.(someone is gonna come and bite my bottom for saying this). Another truth however is, they are fast catching up.

As for nollywood, the day I watched Emeka Enyeocha act as a 'struggling' youth corper who owned a duplex and a fleet of cars, I saw how 'close' they were to reality. (Hope you get my meaning).

It's high-time we jettisoned a lot of these generalizations and actually saw individuals for who they are rather than biting deeper into this Nigerian Men vs. Nigerian Women 'apple' and letting it be ruin discourses such as this one.

sanb: I'll help you there; men are confident, women are (confident as well)......

Ok, women are confident too-just for the lack of appropriate word.lol

nenergy: Nice write up, but i don't think "Confidence" is a feminine virtue. Don't get me wrong, it doesn't just sound right in the ears to call say; "that woman is confident". It almost sounds like saying; "that woman is proud, loud, disrespectful or arrogant". Suffice to say, men are confident, women are...... (please give me time to find a more appropriate word or help me-i'll be back)

sanb: I'll help you there; men are confident, women are (confident as well)......

Ok, women are confident too-just for the lack of appropriate word.lol

Hahahahaha Lol; now you're talking. I hope I didn't intimidate you ; as it wasn’t my intention...Lol again...

nenergy:
Ok, women are confident too-just for the lack of appropriate word.lol

huni_naija:

sorry oo my sister lol.. *noted*

haba no problem na

caesaraba:

It's true that a lot of 9ja men have lagged behind in this dept.(someone is gonna come and bite my bottom for saying this). Another truth however is, they are fast catching up.

As for nollywood, the day I watched Emeka Enyeocha act as a 'struggling' youth corper who owned a duplex and a fleet of cars, I saw how 'close' they were to reality. (Hope you get my meaning).

It's high-time we jettisoned a lot of these generalizations and actually saw individuals for who they are rather than biting deeper into this Nigerian Men vs. Nigerian Women 'apple' and letting it be ruin discourses such as this one.

you are very much on point but typical of nigerians,they always degenerate every issue to a sexist issue,e.g this thread.if you look closely,you will see what i am talking about,then as for nollywood homevideos,the movie 'mr and mrs just came to my mind and some irritating yoruba movies,especially the one done by ogogo.his movies are always to sexist,always bringing women down

caesaraba:

It's true that a lot of 9ja men have lagged behind in this dept.(someone is gonna come and bite my bottom for saying this). Another truth however is, they are fast catching up.

As for nollywood, the day I watched Emeka Enyeocha act as a 'struggling' youth corper who owned a duplex and a fleet of cars, I saw how 'close' they were to reality. (Hope you get my meaning).

It's high-time we jettisoned a lot of these generalizations and actually saw individuals for who they are rather than biting deeper into this Nigerian Men vs. Nigerian Women 'apple' and letting it be ruin discourses such as this one.

you are very much on point but typical of nigerians,they always degenerate every issue to a sexist issue,e.g this thread.if you look closely,you will see what i am talking about,then as for nollywood homevideos,the movie 'mr and mrs just came to my mind and some irritating yoruba movies,especially the one done by ogogo.his movies are always to sexist,always bringing women down

I dunno y sum guys can't understand that der is 'confident' and 'overconfident' Sha only chicken-liverED guys dont lyk d confident girls. I think dey feel intimidated

An over confident woman can send the husband parking from the house

mechummy: I dunno y sum guys can't understand that der is 'confident' and 'overconfident' Sha only chicken-liverED guys dont lyk d confident girls. I think dey feel intimidated

why do you let what SOME guys think bother you?

delors: Bros, na over skill dey kill monkey o and na over confidence worry Goliath that time...
If woman dey too confident for my side, bros, na race i go pick o...that kind one fit shlaaaaap ur face for public and ask u 'So, I slap u, eh eh, wetin u wan do?'

this is just an example of insecurity because if you know who you are and you know your worth,you wont run.if you are a confident man with ,you will be bold with ANY lady and you wont be having this fear

tintingz: An over confident woman can send the husband parking from the house

a confident man will not be moved by anything irrespective of who his wife is in the society,its men suffering from inferiority complex that run

AjanleKoko: I'm not so sure Nigerian men like confident women, to be honest

When i handle my friend, he quits the affair that he cnt marry someonr who intimidates him or who s nt humble bt feel she s big. He condemed ma proffession and level showing that he s afraid of me!

Oahray: why do you let what SOME guys think bother you?

I'm not bothered and I never let such things get to me:PI'm just surprised sum guys no follow

tintingz: A highly confident woman can send the husband parking from the house

Except what you mean by "highly confident" is a lousy, nagging, and pompous woman, I beg to differ.

Marriage is teamwork. A man with a progressive mind would give anything to have a confident woman as a partner. Someone who can hold it down anytime, anyday. Someone he can depend on. A woman who can objectively look at him and say "dude, you are fv.cking up. Why don't we try it this way?"

It's only men who go into marriage with the idea of 'Me vs. Her' that can have a problem with a confident woman.

It's supposed to be Me + You pursuing our goals together as loving partners. A woman with confidence is good for a man joor. Helps him succeed and stay sharp always.

@ Op. Did u make a research to knw if Nigerian men like confidence. In as much as i like a woman to be open, i also need her to be reserve in some areas. Confident women could become women advocates n probably make u suffer! Beware