Hannibal:

Time:04.36 am.
Date: 26/06/2008
Venue:Allen Avenue, Ikeja.

Hotfunmi: How far?
Hannibal: Do i know u?
***Hannibal looks at the vagrant saying hi, she was dressed like an Idumota tomato seller.

Hotfunmi: I don't know u but i love your ride and i think we should spend the night together.
Hannibal: Can u step back a bit??, Your body odour will make me lose my appetite.
Hotfunmi: Sorry sir, my name is Funmi, i am 38 years of age,Born in Ilesha and prostitution is my God-given talent.
Hannibal: Excuse me? I don't patronise whores. . . .Get lost and don't wreck this lovely evening for me.

Hotfunmi: Oga, u have to patronise me tonight. Look at the time. There's no market and i must pay rent and other bills.
Hannibal: Go and steal. Better still, find anutha job. At your age, u should be a mother and not a filthy LovePeddler.
Hotfunmi: I have been in 6 marriages, none of em worked so prostitution seems the only way for me.
Hannibal: ***Sighs*** Story of ma life.

Hotfunmi: Oga, find me something na. . . .even if u no wan DO.
Hannibal: Get lost!!!
Hotfunmi: Love your neighbor as thyself.
Hannibal: You are not my neighbour, u are a flaming LovePeddler.

Hotfunmi: I go cry o. . . .
Hannibal: Go ahead.
Hotfunmi: It's not fair o, God loves a cheerful giver.
Hannibal: Shut up u CUNT!!!
****Hannibal walked back to his car and drove off****************

lol!!!

Hannibal:

Time:04.36 am.
Date: 26/06/2008
Venue:Allen Avenue, Ikeja.

Hotfunmi: How far?
Hannibal: Do i know u?
***Hannibal looks at the vagrant saying hi, she was dressed like an Idumota tomato seller.

Hotfunmi: I don't know u but i love your ride and i think we should spend the night together.
Hannibal: Can u step back a bit??, Your body odour will make me lose my appetite.
Hotfunmi: Sorry sir, my name is Funmi, i am 38 years of age,Born in Ilesha and prostitution is my God-given talent.
Hannibal: Excuse me? I don't patronise whores. . . .Get lost and don't wreck this lovely evening for me.

Hotfunmi: Oga, u have to patronise me tonight. Look at the time. There's no market and i must pay rent and other bills.
Hannibal: Go and steal. Better still, find anutha job. At your age, u should be a mother and not a filthy LovePeddler.
Hotfunmi: I have been in 6 marriages, none of em worked so prostitution seems the only way for me.
Hannibal: ***Sighs*** Story of ma life.

Hotfunmi: Oga, find me something na. . . .even if u no wan DO.
Hannibal: Get lost!!!
Hotfunmi: Love your neighbor as thyself.
Hannibal: You are not my neighbour, u are a flaming LovePeddler.

Hotfunmi: I go cry o. . . .
Hannibal: Go ahead.
Hotfunmi: It's not fair o, God loves a cheerful giver.
Hannibal: Shut up u CUNT!!!
****Hannibal walked back to his car and drove off****************

LMAO

Wow,i love this new play. . . .what's the title?

Cristalz:

LMAO

Wow,i love this new play. . . .what's the title?

The title is . . . . The Geezer n The Prostitute!!!!
Available in HMV and Virgin Megastores in the UK.
Iweka Rd and Idumota in Lagos.
Price $29.99
Grab a copy NOW!!!!

P.S. Part 2 is on the way!!!!

Lol, that was hilarious.

The thread has taken a turn, a turn to be locked

omo the level of intense dislike here

dey trip me gan

Seems its gonna be a big HIT  

Watching out for part 2  


@G
Level lock-up hasn't been attained yet

Hannibal:

Time:04.36 am.
Date: 26/06/2008
Venue:Allen Avenue, Ikeja.

Hotfunmi: How far?
Hannibal: Do i know u?
***Hannibal looks at the vagrant saying hi, she was dressed like an Idumota tomato seller.

Hotfunmi: I don't know u but i love your ride and i think we should spend the night together.
Hannibal: Can u step back a bit??, Your body odour will make me lose my appetite.
Hotfunmi: Sorry sir, my name is Funmi, i am 38 years of age,Born in Ilesha and prostitution is my God-given talent.
Hannibal: Excuse me? I don't patronise whores. . . .Get lost and don't wreck this lovely evening for me.

Hotfunmi: Oga, u have to patronise me tonight. Look at the time. There's no market and i must pay rent and other bills.
Hannibal: Go and steal. Better still, find anutha job. At your age, u should be a mother and not a filthy LovePeddler.
Hotfunmi: I have been in 6 marriages, none of em worked so prostitution seems the only way for me.
Hannibal: ***Sighs*** Story of ma life.

Hotfunmi: Oga, find me something na. . . .even if u no wan DO.
Hannibal: Get lost!!!
Hotfunmi: Love your neighbor as thyself.
Hannibal: You are not my neighbour, u are a flaming LovePeddler.

Hotfunmi: I go cry o. . . .
Hannibal: Go ahead.
Hotfunmi: It's not fair o, God loves a cheerful giver.
Hannibal: Shut up u CUNT!!!
****Hannibal walked back to his car and drove off****************

ROFLMFSAO, Hannibal,don't kill me oooo, abeg,

Me likey, Now back to "babysitting", I have bills to pay and would rather do this anything that whoring, WORD,

Pick up lines my foot - Hannibal and RedHotChic should simply get together and end this drama, its getting old.

The last pick up line I got was

'you're so tall, so you have to lean down to hear what I say, giving me the chance to do anything I want'

she was cute, but a little drunk I must confess.

I knew it!

This one sef dey post

This Nairaland and favoritism

chai!

Cristalz:

Seems its going to be a big HIT 

Watching out for part 2 

Cristalz, tell us the worst pick-up line u have ever heard. . . .

Chat2MeBac:

ROFLMFSAO, Hannibal,don't kill me oooo, abeg,

Me likey, Now back to "babysitting", I have bills to pay and would rather do this anything than whoring, WORD,

Babysitting?? It's tedious for some twits.
Apparently, whoring pays more and they get to experience pure pleasure while ON THE JOB.

@debo

That's the weirdest line i've heard in a long long time  

Anyway what did she say when you 'leaned down' (if u did).  .  .  .that would be the actual pick-up line

@Hannibal
I put it down somewhere on the thread already.  .  .

@ Gamine

whats crawled up your a$$?

Get some laxatives and save us all the trouble ok?

@ Hannibal

tell me you don't secretly fancy redhot?

@ Criz

I did lean down, got a whiff of beer tainted breath and quite a few naughty thoughts. I didn't go further though, them drunk chicks can claim rape in the morning.

debosky:


@ Hannibal

tell me you don't secretly fancy redhot?

3 reasons why i don't fancy her. . .

She is too old for me. . . .She is 38!!
Her dentition is nuthing to write home about, she's got eczema on her incisors.
She is a LovePeddler!!

@debo
You could always say twaz she who ''raped'' you 

@Hannibal
Eczema on the incissors? Lmao. Come on now,ain't that bad is it? Koolu tempa

Hannibal:

3 reasons why i don't fancy her. . .

She is too old for me. . . .She is 38!!
Her dentition is nuthing to write home about, she's got eczema on her incisors.
She is a LovePeddler!!

Hannibal! Hannibal! Hannibal!!!!!!!!!!!, It's whaling season on my Islands, if you behave I might just take ya!!!

Hannibal:

3 reasons why i don't fancy her. . .

She is too old for me. . . .She is 38!!
Her dentition is nuthing to write home about, she's got eczema on her incisors.
She is a LovePeddler!!

4. She uses the penury she gets to pay her toyboy for washing undies
5. She's clingy
6. C'MON, TAKE A LOOK AT HER

eldee you sef don reach there? Or how you take know all this? You are a suspect!

@ Criz

Well I could claim rape, but she's a shapely petite girl. . . . no court would ever convict her.

My only pick up lines on nairaland came from a certain natmike/rose ijeoma fellow who wanted to have homosexual relations, he has apparently threatened Kit as well.

Annoying pick up lines ke. . . . . . .  .

Am too busy sizing up the mark, to be hearing any pick up lines

Cristalz:

@Hannibal
Eczema on the incissors? Lmao. Come on now,ain't that bad is it? Koolu tempa

I am chilled. . . . . Sub-zero temperature.

Chat2MeBac:



Hannibal! Hannibal! Hannibal!!!!!!!!!!!, It's whaling season on my Islands, if you behave I might just take ya!!!

I think i'm game for that!!!

eldee:

4. She uses the penury she gets to pay her toyboy for washing undies
5. She's clingy
6. C'MON, TAKE A LOOK AT HER

U are a MEANIE!!!

debosky:

My only pick up lines on nairaland came from a certain natmike/rose ijeoma fellow who wanted to have homosexual relations, he has apparently threatened Kit as well.

I can see you're still playing hard to get. Lmao

debosky:

eldee you sef don reach there? Or how you take know all this? You are a suspect!

You've forgotten bout THE COMPANY??
We have our sources na . . . INTEL never fails

Hannibal:

You are a MEANIE!!!

Tell me which of 'em is a lie?

stillwater:

I can see you're still playing hard to get. Lmao

Thats HARSH!!!!

Debosky n Kit should be investigated.
A gay came online and he chose u 2s out of 100,000 male members of NL.
The probability of that happening to 2 GAYnners is 0.00002.
Debo, it's time to FESS UP.

@Hannibal
Dude you call people meanies when it seems you're the reason for the word   Sub-zero.  .  .  .still as deadly as liquid nitrogen my friend.

@debo

Be bold.  .  .share the pick-up lines you've used,not just the ones you get.

Oh yes. . . .Debo thanks for reminding me jo

There was one particularly annoying time back in Uni. . . . .

I was chatting up these chicks and seemingly getting somewhere only to
find out they were going to a gay club. Naturally I was about to say sayonara,
then one winked at me, promising two for one, if i followed them.

That was what swayed me oo. I follow them enter.

Worst decision I ever made in my fucking life.

One Oloshi gay with Italian Accent come meet me. . . . .

''Honey, I am a gay, and I know you would love to take a long drag out of me''

Sweet mother of Jesus  

debosky:

eldee you sef don reach there? Or how you take know all this? You are a suspect!

@ Criz

Well I could claim rape, but she's a shapely petite girlno court would ever convict her.

My only pick up lines on nairaland came from a certain natmike/rose ijeoma fellow who wanted to have homosexual relations, he has apparently threatened Kit as well.

Fucking hell!!!!!!!!
This rose Ijioma is one of the reasons why i removed Yim on my profile!!. . . . . .
Babe Wanna strike up sum B.s with me at all cost!!. . . . .
Spewin loads of bunkums up and down about how she hasnt seen no Airplane before and other B.S . . .

doyin13:

Oh yes. . . .Debo thanks for reminding me jo

There was one particularly annoying time back in Uni. . . . .

I was chatting up these chicks and seemingly getting somewhere only to
find out they were going to a gay club. Naturally I was about to say sayonara,
then one winked at me, promising two for one, if i followed them.

That was what swayed me oo. I follow them enter.

Worst decision I ever made in my fucking life.

One Oloshi gay with Italian Accent come meet me. . . . .

''Honey, I am a gay, and I know you would love to take a long drag out of me''

Sweet mother of Jesus  

LMAO

A long drag?

doyin13:

Oh yes. . . .Debo thanks for reminding me jo

There was one particularly annoying time back in Uni. . . . .

I was chatting up these chicks and seemingly getting somewhere only to
find out they were going to a gay club. Naturally I was about to say sayonara,
then one winked at me, promising two for one, if i followed them.

That was what swayed me oo. I follow them enter.

Worst decision I ever made in my fucking life.

One Oloshi gay with Italian Accent come meet me. . . . .

''Honey, I am a gay, and I know you would love to take a long drag out of me''

Sweet mother of Jesus  

That was golden. . . . . . . I hope he didn't bust your ass.
Besides, The South Coast of England, Portsmouth n Brighton are full of flaming faggotz!!!!

I remember me 1st time @ Brighton. . . . . . .Went to the beach to catch some sun.
In the evening i went to a nightclub, i was oblivious to the fact that 90% of em clubs were gay-clubs.
I was buying a drink when i saw 2 faggotz french-kiss each other. . . . .
Blimey . . . . .  just made a You-turn and bailed out of there before someone starts shooting his gay mouth to spew hokum to me.

The Sly:

Fucking hell!!!!!!!!
This rose Ijioma is one of the reasons why i removed Yim on my profile!!. . . . . .
Babe Wanna strike up sum B.s with me at all cost!!. . . . .
Spewin loads of bunkums up and down about how she hasnt seen no Airplane before and other B.S . . .

She's a He ooo, lmao

stillwater:

She's a He ooo, lmao

Now i truly believe what my pastor told me. . . . . . . .He said end time is here!
Pls God. . . . . . Forgive me and take me along when the rapture is finally here. . . . . . .
I want to ride camels in heaven too!

@ Hannibal

see? even sly has been attacked by the resident homo of nairaland.

I was approached by some gay dude in naija too,

went to the club with my friends (my first time) and was chilling at the bar, this dude walks up to me, starts a convo and asks me what I want to drink.
My greedy self said "red wine please", he bought me the wine and we started talking. Then he started asking me funny questions and touching my arm as he spoke. Next thing he said he wanted to go to the washroom, that I should go outside the club and wait for him by his white Jeep, so we could know each other better.

I gulped down the red wine, summoned courage to ask a chick to dance and went right into the middle of the dancing crowd. Didn't go near the bar again all night.

The Sly:

Now i truly believe what my pastor told me. . . . . . . .He said end time is here!
Please God. . . . . . Forgive me and take me along when the rapture is finally here. . . . . . .
I want to ride camels in heaven too!

Oh ma dayzzz . . .
Any church you went to today, keep going ooh
That Pastor's power is top-class