It depends o madam...if the guy had sample (sex )you severally.. he may not marry on time and at the end choose another girl after wasting your time...A guy who had tasted you may not be eager to commit himself...shine your eye and pray to your God to help you out....

believer01:
26yrs

I feel he is ready for marriage, but unfortunately not with you!!!!
You think you are the best thing that happened to him? Simply because he tells you so and you are more of a convenience.
Wait till he seeks what he truly desires, then he would truly be ready for marriage.
Wake up and smell the coffee. Why buy milk if you can get the cow free?

I really do not want to dwell on how old you are because from your write up, you have graduated and served the nation which makes you an adult.
First thing first, you and your man must be psychologically and mentally prepared to go into it as that will aid you in absorbing the shocks in marriage.
I can see that your man is not ready from this perspective and how ready you are can't be ascertained too.
My word for you, if dude is not ready please move your ministry to another site and you will certainly find love again. You can force a horse to a river but can't force it to drink water.
Move on and the world won't end.

How can you be asking if it's okay to wait forever? If it makes sense to you, then go ahead and wait till the proverbial jesus comes.

There's no law that says every relationship must end in marriage btw, he's showing signs of not wanting to marry you, but I'll advise, you ask him point blank one last time, whatever he says should help you make a decision, although it's clear from where I stand.

Don't tell yourself you can't find someone else to understand, that's just desperate.

is he igbo? if he is.. then they dont marry early. they want to arrive first before they marry.. give him a Break.. it's not easy to be a man.. i understand whats he is passing through..

Sveen:
Huh! Maybe the next poster might have something good to say.

OMG! This eediot got me lol.. ..

Nairaland is filled with sick people..

If u didn't have anything to say y insinuate the next poster might have something to say..

You Must be a Comedian bros..

See serious Relationship matter, u're posting rubbish.

*Back to the matter*

Sis, in life, all we owe ourselves is Happiness!
Follow Happiness wherever it is..
Just be happy.

B4 I start I don't knw ur age, if u are above 26, u should tell hime one on one u want to knw if he wish to marry and which day bcs u are not getting younger,
If u av a dream of having children and his silent, u should also be silent let him getting the news 4m someone else that u are geting marry to a guy. Tell him 2 times in 4 days, maybe he did not want to marry u bcs u are not 4m dsame state.

I wish u d best

My dear 7yrs is nt a joke. I'm sure u hv committed series of abortions 4 him. If u we're 2 b my sister I would hv taken 4 deliverance. U beta dump him nw b4 he dumps u. because 2 me he ws already married 2 u durin dos 7yrs of datin. He needs a divorce.

mrklean:
Please advice me I received this txt from my girlfriend. AYO AM SORRY, BUT I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE. TILL WE MEET AGAIN. GOODBYE THANK 4 EVERYTHING. AM GOING TO MISS U. MY PARENT DONT WANT U, IN MY LIVE .

You have been used and dumped!!!!

ForteNL:
Nice story and wonderful comments.
I finally registered on NL cos of this thread after being a guest for 5 years.
Abeg, dash me some likes to welcome me here. Thanks

Welcome to Nairaland,if dats u on ur dp,you really belong to Nobody except when I want You!

happney65:
You want to get married to him abi?Does he have a Job?and i guess you also have one too abi?If both of you get something doing,Abeg do as our Yoruba Ladies dey do..Make hin inpregrante you asap..Get pregrant for him joo and no story again..Simple

Op this is a dumb advice please don't do it. Using pregnancy to tie yourself n a man down is the worst decision ever!

my dear....

the future is never predictable.

he might change his mind when he gets his millions.

he might stick to you when he gets his millions..

but, wat do you feel inside....?

take one of the two roads ....

take the risk!!

any might favor you.... deeply contemplate.

your age?

at wat age do you need a husband?

you are a lady.....

though your guy might still be there even after your 40yrs... it is a risk....


my conclusion is..... take the next risky road..

HouseT:
It depends o madam...if the guy had sample (sex )you severally.. he may not marry on time and at the end choose another girl after wasting your time...A guy who had tasted you may not be eager to commit himself...shine your eye and pray to your God to help you out....

that's what happen .. if the lady have nothing to offer other than sex..

At 26yrs old, girl you better scram! Date someone else biko.. this dude clearly doesn't have marriage in mind anytime soon. Abi he wants to turn you to Aunty Gwegwegwe?

Maybe if he sees you with another man he'll buckle up.. if he doesn't then that will be clear confirmation and he was never the one.

ikombe:
leave him maka y na

7 years and he is still not ready?
Tell me, when will he be ready?
AFter the second coming of Jesus?

Eyop:

If i may ask,how old are you?

must u quote all the story??

Sanchez01:

Sorry Dear, @ the bolded, it is not inevitable. It's a choice and this is why he has chosen not to talk about it. I think is all that is required here. If you don't agree with his dreams of making millions before marriage, then simply walk out, explain your reasons to him and move on. You of all persons know how old you are now and it would be unwise to keep mute just because he doesn't want it or want to talk about it.
Besides, relationships are not cult that you cannot walk out of it willingly. Seven years and you're not trying to rush him? My dear, it's a relationship and not a degree programme.

lolz @degree programme

Na all these kain yeye relationships dey cause infidelity in marriage.


At the end of the day, you'd go after a guy you don't love out of desperation while keeping contacts with your school bf.

You might even end up with a virgin rich and innocent guy, after spending 7 good years under another man's roof


A beg abeg, just stick with your boyfriend, force him to marry you!
"Ki olorun ma je ka gbe egun elegun."


I will never marry any woman who has spent 7 years with another man. Your best shot is to lie about your past.

Whoever hears this will marvel

adorablepepple:

Op this is a dumb advice please don't do it. Using pregnancy to tie yourself n a man down is the worst decision ever!

says who .. it's works fine for some ladies though

adorablepepple:

Op this is a dumb advice please don't do it. Using pregnancy to tie yourself n a man down is the worst decision ever!

Just joking cos i know that is what most peeps do..Babe,if he does not want to marry you and get commited,look elsewhere please..Thank You

believer01:
i am a regular member on nairaland and i create this user to remain anonymous. i need mature guys and ladies to advise me on a way forward.
dont mind my grammar and typographical errors

i have been dating this guy since our 100level days in school, most people fear in school is that school relationships ends at the gate but our did'nt end at the gate. we went for youth service and still continue with our lovelife though the relationship was collapsing during service year but we built it up again and everything was okay after service. i happened to serve in his state and i was retained after service which makes us to start staying in the same town.
In school all our focus was to finish school, serve and get a good job. marriage was not really discussed cos i was thinking it was too early and since we were doing fine for 7years i believe marriage is inevitable (i hope that word is correctly use). there is one thing i discovered after service
1. he is not ready to talk about marriage not because he is tired of me or anything (cos i know i am one of the best things that has happened to him) but cos he believe he must have millions of naira in his account.
2. he believes the tradition of not marrying early in his family could also delay his marriage even though i have met almost all his family members.
3. he brings up quarrel or another issue when i bring up visiting my family even though he has met them twice.


my questions:
1. should i wait till "forever" when he will be ready to discuss/ready for the marriage?
2. i love him but now i have offers from different guys and i know the offers won't last forever(i have turn down 2 already). should i stay and pray he comes to his senses or leave him?
3. we are so closed to each other and understand each other so well that it will be difficult to understand anyone else like that.
4. am not against him having millions of naira but "money is never enough" his friends that are not as okay as himself are getting married already.
5. am not trying to rush him into marriage but how am i to know i won't regret waiting until when he will be ready? what if he leaves me after the long wait?

7years relationship now. plssss no insult we all do crazy things for love but we learn everyday and i believe this forum will give me the candid answer i seek

You see, sometimes when i give relationship advice it always seem as if i am too assertive.

Sis please look elsewhere because you have made that mistake from the onset. I always tell young ladies in their teenage age or very early twenties to date guys who are well advanced in age like an age gap of 7 minimum to avoid complications such as this because most guys in their twenties are not just ready to settle down and even if im not sure, i will not be surprised that you guys have close age gaps and trust me, such affairs usually end in break up.

Age is nothing they say but that assertion holds fore a guy and lady in her very late twenties and early thirties but for a guy or lady in their teens or early twenties,its a mare child's play when you date someone with very close age gap.

So if you are a teenage lady reading this or you are in your very early twenties, except you just want to increase your chance of been used and dumped,avoid dating guys of your age bracket because at the end, it will mostly lead to you getting frustrated as you can not continue to wait forever and the guy still having a swell time even at 29 while you are 26/27 even if you both started very early together.

Ladies be wise,avoid wasted years.

believer01:
i am a regular member on nairaland and i create this user to remain anonymous. i need mature guys and ladies to advise me on a way forward.
dont mind my grammar and typographical errors

i have been dating this guy since our 100level days in school, most people fear in school is that school relationships ends at the gate but our did'nt end at the gate. we went for youth service and still continue with our lovelife though the relationship was collapsing during service year but we built it up again and everything was okay after service. i happened to serve in his state and i was retained after service which makes us to start staying in the same town.
In school all our focus was to finish school, serve and get a good job. marriage was not really discussed cos i was thinking it was too early and since we were doing fine for 7years i believe marriage is inevitable (i hope that word is correctly use). there is one thing i discovered after service
1. he is not ready to talk about marriage not because he is tired of me or anything (cos i know i am one of the best things that has happened to him) but cos he believe he must have millions of naira in his account.
2. he believes the tradition of not marrying early in his family could also delay his marriage even though i have met almost all his family members.
3. he brings up quarrel or another issue when i bring up visiting my family even though he has met them twice.


my questions:
1. should i wait till "forever" when he will be ready to discuss/ready for the marriage?
2. i love him but now i have offers from different guys and i know the offers won't last forever(i have turn down 2 already). should i stay and pray he comes to his senses or leave him?
3. we are so closed to each other and understand each other so well that it will be difficult to understand anyone else like that.
4. am not against him having millions of naira but "money is never enough" his friends that are not as okay as himself are getting married already.
5. am not trying to rush him into marriage but how am i to know i won't regret waiting until when he will be ready? what if he leaves me after the long wait?

7years relationship now. plssss no insult we all do crazy things for love but we learn everyday and i believe this forum will give me the candid answer i seek

The truth is that he won't be ready in 5yrs time
Another truth is that your chances of getting reasonable offer in 5yrs time looks slim if he doesn't marry you
Go back and consider those offers, use your head and do the right thing!

Poster run for your life I smell a rat
I was fooled by someone like that
In three years he gave me flimsy excuses why he was not ready to marry
Thank God I left, and when I left I run into his bestfriend who sat me down, told him my boyfriend now ex had a woman and a baby in the village, had I waited on his excuses,

My dear, such delay often times is a sign dat u two can't end up together. 7 whole yrs! It is well. He might actually mean well for u, but since u knw very well dat they marry late in their linage, I think u should be able to do d calculations urself. I wil advice u take d whole situation to God in prayers, ask God for divine direction and step to take. It is well with u

Acidosis:
Na all these kain yeye relationships dey cause infidelity in marriage.


At the end of the day, you'd go after a guy you don't love out of desperation while keeping contacts with your school bf.

You might even end up with a virgin rich and innocent guy, after spending 7 good years under another man's roof


A beg abeg, just stick with your boyfriend, force him to marry you!
"Ki olorun ma je ka gbe egun elegun."


I will never marry any woman who has spent 7 years with another man. Your best shot is to lie about your past.

Whoever hears this will marvel

LOL!Does that really matter?She cant force him to marry her,the best bet is to move on because a broken courtship is far better than a broken marriage.

TheSonOfMark:

26 years old? I think what you should seek from him is a defined relationship. Let him state in clear terms what you both are to each other but don't arm-twist him into admitting it. Let him put things in perspective without you presenting yourself as desperate.

Sometimes we men need that extra push before we commit. Do that "pushing" with an obvious sincerity born out of you feelings for him and not out of selfish.

A smart, sane and responsible man would allay your fears.

the best advice so far.

remember that the best age for a lady to get married is at 20's

believer01:
i am a regular member on nairaland and i create this user to remain anonymous. i need mature guys and ladies to advise me on a way forward.
dont mind my grammar and typographical errors

i have been dating this guy since our 100level days in school, most people fear in school is that school relationships ends at the gate but our did'nt end at the gate. we went for youth service and still continue with our lovelife though the relationship was collapsing during service year but we built it up again and everything was okay after service. i happened to serve in his state and i was retained after service which makes us to start staying in the same town.
In school all our focus was to finish school, serve and get a good job. marriage was not really discussed cos i was thinking it was too early and since we were doing fine for 7years i believe marriage is inevitable (i hope that word is correctly use). there is one thing i discovered after service
1. he is not ready to talk about marriage not because he is tired of me or anything (cos i know i am one of the best things that has happened to him) but cos he believe he must have millions of naira in his account.
2. he believes the tradition of not marrying early in his family could also delay his marriage even though i have met almost all his family members.
3. he brings up quarrel or another issue when i bring up visiting my family even though he has met them twice.


my questions:
1. should i wait till "forever" when he will be ready to discuss/ready for the marriage?
2. i love him but now i have offers from different guys and i know the offers won't last forever(i have turn down 2 already). should i stay and pray he comes to his senses or leave him?
3. we are so closed to each other and understand each other so well that it will be difficult to understand anyone else like that.
4. am not against him having millions of naira but "money is never enough" his friends that are not as okay as himself are getting married already.
5. am not trying to rush him into marriage but how am i to know i won't regret waiting until when he will be ready? what if he leaves me after the long wait?

7years relationship now. plssss no insult we all do crazy things for love but we learn everyday and i believe this forum will give me the candid answer i seek

My Answers to your Questions

1. From your discussion, it seems your boyfriend is tired of you. You have waited for long (7years) and now that at the mentioning of marriage he is angry, go for who is ready to make you his wife. Don't be a fool @ 40 dear.

2. Issues like this is common sense. Prayer may not be the answer. Discuss with him if he truly wants to marry you. But from your discussion, it shows he needs the financial strength to support the family. So u can give him time to sort it out.

5. Give him time but don't just turn down all d offers from other guys.

believer01:
i am a regular member on nairaland and i create this user to remain anonymous. i need mature guys and ladies to advise me on a way forward.
dont mind my grammar and typographical errors

i have been dating this guy since our 100level days in school, most people fear in school is that school relationships ends at the gate but our did'nt end at the gate. we went for youth service and still continue with our lovelife though the relationship was collapsing during service year but we built it up again and everything was okay after service. i happened to serve in his state and i was retained after service which makes us to start staying in the same town.
In school all our focus was to finish school, serve and get a good job. marriage was not really discussed cos i was thinking it was too early and since we were doing fine for 7years i believe marriage is inevitable (i hope that word is correctly use). there is one thing i discovered after service
1. he is not ready to talk about marriage not because he is tired of me or anything (cos i know i am one of the best things that has happened to him) but cos he believe he must have millions of naira in his account.
2. he believes the tradition of not marrying early in his family could also delay his marriage even though i have met almost all his family members.
3. he brings up quarrel or another issue when i bring up visiting my family even though he has met them twice.


my questions:
1. should i wait till "forever" when he will be ready to discuss/ready for the marriage?
2. i love him but now i have offers from different guys and i know the offers won't last forever(i have turn down 2 already). should i stay and pray he comes to his senses or leave him?
3. we are so closed to each other and understand each other so well that it will be difficult to understand anyone else like that.
4. am not against him having millions of naira but "money is never enough" his friends that are not as okay as himself are getting married already.
5. am not trying to rush him into marriage but how am i to know i won't regret waiting until when he will be ready? what if he leaves me after the long wait?

7years relationship now. plssss no insult we all do crazy things for love but we learn everyday and i believe this forum will give me the candid answer i seek

Money change bois to men ...he would go for someone else when he finally have millions.
my advice as a guy

this I think is one of the disadvantages of long courtship, getting into a relationship when u know u can't get married in like 4-5 years have huge disadvantages, d guy tend to get so use to u that he takes u for granted, some believe u can't leave them after so many years. I think whatever u do, first sit down and count d cost, forget about what people will say, they will always talk, it is ur life. I also think u need to still talk to him, let him no waiting for him is not d problem but u need to know what u are waiting for, of cause he will get angry, that's d weapon he has been using against u, he will just flare up and u will stop talking, but don't be intimidated this time, insist on knowing watxup, if he cares for u at all, he will talk to u. and from his response, make your decision .