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Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? - Romance (3) - Nairaland

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Poll: Are You Looking Forward To That Big Day?

Yes: 83% (59 votes)
No: 16% (12 votes)
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Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Nobody: 1:58pm On Oct 26, 2009
Wow good luck with your archaism. I thought Education eradicated things like this but I was wrong lipsrsealed
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Pharoh: 1:59pm On Oct 26, 2009
erico2k2:

ah its Mirs independence we are talking about here, erm i would contribute %50 and she the other %50,After all women should be equal to man nah haba, bw am I sencing denial of responsibilities here? shocked

Guy i am tired ooo women don't know their roles anymore they now want to compete with us. Our mothers used to be proud when getting married, they are so concerneed about their kid, sing, bath, play and train them in the right way but these educated ladies now hmmm let me seal my lips for now.

They start talking about equal responsibilites after you have footed the marriage bill, is that not double standard?

Ebonyeyes:

Wow good luck with your archaism. I thought Education eradicated things like this but I was wrong lipsrsealed

Not what you think, i am sad you have to label me with that kind of statement sad
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 2:10pm On Oct 26, 2009
@Paroh,
I tire oh, now Ladies, could you help me out here, No who isthe uneducated or the not to educated girl/woman got to depend on? and the not too educated man as wel got to depend on?
btw, as far as you are saying women should have equal role and obligation fine,I would love to have one of yah for a bride, but the wedding arangements has to be %50/%50, IF we plan to spend 2milion on our wedding/marriage,you will bring 1m and me 1M, deal?
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Pharoh: 2:13pm On Oct 26, 2009
To add to that is there a need to still pay the bride price and do traditional wedding?
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Rosabelle(f): 2:13pm On Oct 26, 2009
@Pharoh
Dude, theres no question on the leadership role. Problem is, a lot of terms have to be redefined with wisdom. A leader is to lead and not to dictate. Think about that.
If society knew what was best, explain to me why society hasnt solved nigeria's problems. Or does it only apply to man/woman issues?
Society knows best, and thats why women are so unhappy?
My friend, society is made up of people and if youre telling me I should allow people who dont know me or my wants and needs to define them, then Im telling you youre wrong.

You people seem to have a warped mindset of the so called 'our mothers' who are happy to get married bla bla bla.
You people never hear women discuss their husbands and so that facade a mother puts up of being happy is for her children. Because she knows her happiness is theirs and so she cant appear discontent.
So dont think those women were happy. Many of them put up acts out of love for their children. But if asked, you'l be shocked at what those women have to say about their men
And thats the difference. Today, a girl no longer wants to have to swallow everything and make the man feel like he can make her unhappy and still be called a man. It is also his duty to see to her well being. And with that, I dont mean paying bride price or buying bread.
If your argument is only the monetary aspect, then I'l tell you, I can fend for myself and four others. What else are you bringing to the table??
You people tend to think as long as youre spending money, you can demand all you want and have a right to get it. WRONG!
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Rosabelle(f): 2:19pm On Oct 26, 2009
erico2k2:

@Paroh,
I tire oh, now Ladies, could you help me out here, No who isthe uneducated or the not to educated girl/woman got to depend on? and the not too educated man as wel got to depend on?
btw, as far as you are saying women should have equal role and obligation fine,I would love to have one of yah for a bride, but the wedding arangements has to be %50/%50, IF we plan to spend 2milion on our wedding/marriage,you will bring 1m and me 1M, deal?
And as usual when arguing with men, you people have watered down the argument to a monetary one. Of allll the things spoken of, no woman mentioned money, but you people seem to be holding on by a string and so you throw in the money argument to see if that'l shut us up. WRONG.

Thats why my father sent me to school. So that no man will come one day and say: shut up, Im paying the bills.
If I got married to a man and the wedding arrangments cos 2m, we'l split it. Im not a beggar and I am also getting married. I dont think its just the mans responsibility.
And face it, you people have accepted to take on this monetary role so that you can talk. Cos otherwise, you know the woman will defeat you,.
At least this way you can continue to shout at her that you alone paid the 2m (money that would have expired since oh) so she should not argue when you talk.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Pharoh: 2:23pm On Oct 26, 2009
You got it worng its not about the money issue and i will reply you soon my time here on this PC is up.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Nobody: 2:29pm On Oct 26, 2009
Rosabelle:

@Pharoh
Dude, theres no question on the leadership role. Problem is, a lot of terms have to be redefined with wisdom. A leader is to lead and not to dictate. Think about that.
If society knew what was best, explain to me why society hasnt solved nigeria's problems. Or does it only apply to man/woman issues?
Society knows best, and thats why women are so unhappy?
My friend, society is made up of people and if youre telling me I should allow people who dont know me or my wants and needs to define them, then Im telling you youre wrong.

You people seem to have a warped mindset of the so called 'our mothers' who are happy to get married bla bla bla.
You people never hear women discuss their husbands and so that facade a mother puts up of being happy is for her children. Because she knows her happiness is theirs and so she cant appear discontent.
So dont think those women were happy. Many of them put up acts out of love for their children. But if asked, you'l be shocked at what those women have to say about their men
And thats the difference. Today, a girl no longer wants to have to swallow everything and make the man feel like he can make her unhappy and still be called a man. It is also his duty to see to her well being. And with that, I dont mean paying bride price or buying bread.
If your argument is only the monetary aspect, then I'l tell you, I can fend for myself and four others. What else are you bringing to the table??
You people tend to think as long as youre spending money, you can demand all you want and have a right to get it. WRONG!

I totally agree with you. Thats why our fathers sent us to school so that no useless goon will flash money in our faces and expect us to shut up. These men will eventually have daughters lets hope men like them treat their daughters how they are treating girls.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by bluespice(f): 2:29pm On Oct 26, 2009
i'm not thinking of that now
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Rosabelle(f): 2:37pm On Oct 26, 2009
Ebonyeyes:

I totally agree with you. Thats why our fathers sent us to school so that no useless goon will flash money in our faces and expect us to shut up. These men will eventually have daughters lets hope men like them treat their daughters how they are treating girls.
My dear, I tire. Its like chatting with people from the mid 16th century when you hear some nigerian men and their opinions.

LOL. On a lighter note, its funny to see how some people just walk into the thread, answer the question and leave. Not like us, staying back to fight the fight of something completely different smiley) lol
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Nobody: 2:40pm On Oct 26, 2009
Rosabelle:

My dear, I tire. Its like chatting with people from the mid 16th century when you hear some nigerian men and their opinions.

LOL. On a lighter note, its funny to see how some people just walk into the thread, answer the question and leave. Not like us, staying back to fight the fight of something completely different smiley) lol

My dear I think we may be time-warped because I havnt heard these views in years. Anyhoo im sure these men are stuck on their 6th century views and will not see reason. Lets hope their daughters are treated better.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by nana(f): 2:42pm On Oct 26, 2009
Marriage na long thing for now oh! Haven't really imagined myself walking down the aisle. Maybe in another 5-7 yrs sha
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 2:43pm On Oct 26, 2009
@Rosabelle
babe you 2much, I will strongly like to identify myself with ur ergo, erm you are gonna share the cost of the wedding arrangements abi, good on you girl,B4 you guys eat me one more time  lol, you are getting us all wrong, it ain't all about money,its all about equal social responsibilities for both genders,,this problems is not limited to Africa or the un educated alone, lol ironically the opposite is the case in Liberia lol Oh yeh girls one more dig at yah, Since we men are so manly  and full of pride  that we  would be so courageous to ask sweet ladies like y'all hands for marriage, could you girls do thesame,? erm could you be courageous and independent enough to ask a guys hand in marriage eh?, we are talking equal rites  and responsibilities here,oyah shoot
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 2:49pm On Oct 26, 2009
nana:

Marriage na long thing for now oh! Haven't really imagined myself walking down the aisle. Maybe in another 5-7 yrs sha
lol I will take it you are between the age of19-24 or 39-50 lol, right or wrong?
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by redsky1: 2:56pm On Oct 26, 2009
you men make me laugh - why does it always have to be about money when equality or treating a woman with respect is discussed.

the reason "our mothers" endured is cos they and their children would be living a life of acute poverty if they were to ask for basic respect.

its not about education - my late father made sure he drummed it into my head that education is key as a woman and that i should never have to depend on a man.

what i have found is alot of our men have a complex and the only way they feel like men is to marry a woman that they can control and walk all over and in a way is very dependent on them - so that they can feel free to do anything they want.

so back to our resident virgin sweetpie - marriage is sweet if its with the right person and you have God in the marriage. The foundation of the happiness and peace in a marraige is love and God
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Rosabelle(f): 3:02pm On Oct 26, 2009
redsky1:

you men make me laugh - why does it always have to be about money when equality or treating a woman with respect is discussed.
the reason "our mothers" endured is cos they and their children would be living a life of acute poverty if they were to ask for basic respect.
its not about education - my late father made sure he drummed it into my head that education is key as a woman and that i should never have to depend on a man.

what i have found is alot of our men have a complex and the only way they feel like men is to marry a woman that they can control and walk all over and in a way is very dependent on them - so that they can feel free to do anything they want.
so back to our resident virgin sweetpie - marriage is sweet if its with the right person and you have God in the marriage. The foundation of the happiness and peace in a marraige is love and God
O jare better person. Where have you been. Tell 'em
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 3:04pm On Oct 26, 2009
lol how are men treating women? lol Im sure if I dont like the way my woman is treating me, I would sort for a way 4ward lol
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Meldrick(m): 3:07pm On Oct 26, 2009
redsky1:



what i have found is alot of our men have a complex and the only way they feel like men is to marry a woman that they can control and walk all over and in a way is very dependent on them - so that they can feel free to do anything they want.


ladies of nowadays amaze me. When a man seeks a humble wife, why must ladies misinterprete it? They hide from the truth and come up with excuses like the one stated above. They finally give it some crap defination, calling it civilization thereby jeopardizing that sweet institution called marriage.

Back to topic I would have asked, which lady would not lie to get married but nowadays it amazes me that ladies prefer been single parents. Just getting pregnant for some dude and keeping the baby all to themselves. Father Lord show us mercy.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by Nobody: 3:09pm On Oct 26, 2009
It is better to be single than to be with a controlling goon who you have to take permission from to breathe undecided.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 3:11pm On Oct 26, 2009
Ok, Rosabelle  and Redski1,since you r hitting on this Money issue let me ask you both a simple question, when was the last time your B/F asked you for money he aint payingback?
No2,mention thosethings you term as,man overiding you and treating you like dirt or have you to answer to them at thier call,by the way the trend is changing, No young man these days wana get married to a woman that aint got something doing.I think when you talk about marriage  and endurance as regards to our mothers, it goes beond money and physical  stuffs
Ebonyeyes:

It is better to be single than to be with a controlling goon who you have to take permission from to breathe undecided.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by redsky1: 3:15pm On Oct 26, 2009
in defense of some of our men thou - there are some good ones - unfortuantely most of them are taken (my husband included - LOL)

i'm sorry but from what i have seen from our men they are too easily influenced - its almost like your back in primary school dealing with these grown men. a man will be content and one useless friend will put nonsense in his head and trouble don't start

is it not one of his friends that told my husband that he should be careful about me - i am too clever - hmmmmmmmmmmmm i don tire for our men - they marry dumbo they complain they marry intelligence they complain - anyway what that ignoramus failed to realise is that my husband is very happy within himself and doesn't mind if his wife is smart after all at least he knows we will never be hungry (in Jesus name)

abeg all u men saying that we women have adopted western culture and that the ones in naija are the "wife material" open your eyes the world is changing - a woman sitting at home calling her friends to discuss remi hair and mac make up and pumping out children for you with nothing to add to the family is so not this century any longer
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 3:16pm On Oct 26, 2009
Ebonyeyes:

It is better to be single than to be with a controlling goon who you have to take permission from to breathe undecided.
so tell me in waht sceenery would you term this statement 2wards, ie having to ask for permission to breath?
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by redsky1: 3:18pm On Oct 26, 2009
erico2k2:

Ok, Rosabelle  and Redski1,since you r hitting on this Money issue let me ask you both a simple question, when was the last time your B/F asked you for money he aint payingback?
No2,mention thosethings you term as,man overiding you and treating you like dirt or have you to answer to them at thier call,by the way the trend is changing, No young man these days wana get married to a woman that aint got something doing.I think when you talk about marriage  and endurance as regards to our mothers, it goes beond money and physical  stuffs

happily married thank you so no boy friend is asking for money.

like i have said in other posts - my husband has an educated wife with a professional job that knows where her priorities lie - IN MY HOME WITH MY FAMILY. trust me if he were to tell you the sacrifices i have made u wouldn't be forming the opinion your trying to form.

one can be humble i am just so sad the way our women are treated by their husbands all in the name of marriage - it is sad and depressing
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 3:21pm On Oct 26, 2009
lol@ redski1, lol I love the bit where you said men are like school children in Primary schools lol, as much as I hate to admit to that, you are correct right there, waht do you expect from us lot,when we gou out for the day, all we do is husstle and think of how to put food on the table,now thats the typical man thinking,I call it man Program.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by chic2pimp(m): 3:22pm On Oct 26, 2009
@ TOPIC

Make I enjoy life first jare. I'm not yet ready for the pavala married life brings. Na so so wahala everyday I dey hia from married couples.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 3:27pm On Oct 26, 2009
Redski1,
happily married nice one, hence ur views are moderate and diff.I use to think this marriage and when do I get married thing where responsibilitites that where often shifted by Men, never knew women share these views as well nowadays, but I now, there are groups,I mean age groups who does, the over 40s and the under 24s ,I may be wrong though,padon me if Im slow, Im in our lovely country right now on Hols where everything is slow lol,network inclussive.
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 3:30pm On Oct 26, 2009
chic2pimp:

@ TOPIC

Make I enjoy life first jare. I'm not yet ready for the pavala married life brings. Na so so wahala everyday I dey hia from married couples.
Thats what Im talking about lol,Now wont it be scary when a woman starts saying what you've just said? grin grin
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by chic2pimp(m): 3:36pm On Oct 26, 2009
erico2k2:

Thats what Im talking about lol,Now wont it be scary when a woman starts saying what you've just said? grin grin
Well, if she wan destroy her kitten nah her life be dat oo grin grin cheesy
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by iykedare(m): 3:44pm On Oct 26, 2009
[size=16pt]
nana:

Marriage na long thing for now oh! Haven't really imagined myself walking down the aisle. Maybe in another 5-7 yrs sha

SIS,U ARE 21 NOW.IN 7 YRS TIME,U`LL BE 28YRS.IS DAT WHEN U WANT TO GET MARRIED?MAY GOD ANSWER UR PRAYER
[/size]
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 3:47pm On Oct 26, 2009
chic2pimp:

Well, if she wan destroy her kitten nah her life be dat oo grin grin cheesy
 lol Guy dem don Run now  lol
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by erico2k2(m): 3:50pm On Oct 26, 2009
IYKE
leave am first,when se B28 she go de go 4frm one prayer house to another.Dem go say nah witch dey worry am no no say nah her own words of mouth
Re: Ladies Are You Looking Forward To Getting Married? by koolchicco: 4:00pm On Oct 26, 2009
chic2pimp:

Well, if she wan destroy her kitten nah her life be dat oo grin grin cheesy

I could hurry 4 succor, If she wan destroy 'am.  grin *just makin an offer* tongue

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