DopeAngel:
Serious Advice Needed Pls- How Can I Resolve This Impending Doom In My Family

Please nairalanders i kindly need your advice on this family issue. my elder bro met this girl sometime last two years after having too many disappointments in relationship. he said he wants to finally settle down that he is tired of waiting and disappointments.

Now the serious problem is both of them are genotype AS, but my brother does not care, he still wants to go ahead with the marriage. He is saying he has faith and hope in God that nothing will happen. even my parents are not helping matters, my parents are strong church elders and they are even saying my brother should pray that God can change things.

I am so pained with my parents stand on this issue knowing the severe consequence that follows. i was hoping they would outrightly dissolve the relationship but no they are hoping on God. What pains me the most is that the girl herself is a nurse, she knows better than everybody but yet she is not considering that.

Right now i hate the girl because she is coming to ruin the life of bro's unborn children

There is an injection medically that doctors give them to assist them with their incoming babies either before they want to do the do or immediately the girl takes in, that do help the babies come out healthier......

See a medical doctor and help your brother if u truly love him......

Telling an AS man and an AS woman to not get married, or trying to separate them during courtship is harder than ending this world, I have seen many cases, the situation makes them love and want each other more, and trying to forcefully separate them is life threatening to them.......

At least there situation is better not SS and AS......

The so called injection helps them only give birth to AS only by altering the gene when procreation occurs or after......

Help yourself and help your brother.......

ranmoor:
If your bro is rich or d wife, then there is no prob. They can conceive thru IVF. Using in vitro fertilization, they can fertilise the healthy cells and discard the sickle cells... They just have to make sure baby making is thru ivf..
Anything aside that is a real problem! Even the child will not forgive them.
Peace!

I would never forgive my parents, if they do the same

DopeAngel:
you mean i should just let it go. there is really nothing i can do? what if something happens eventually, my brother wont be the only one to suffer the pain. we all as a family would still provide solution together. bro if i am not ready now to accept this. then i would not be ready to help solve an issue that was borne out of a decision i was totally against. His decision was made out of fear of further disappointments if he lets go of this one he has now. He is not balanced emotionally right now.d girl wants to tie him down cos ders no age on her side either. Mid 30's and late 30's

Look for learned elders in the family and relate the issue with them. If nothing is done. Just move on with your life

eyinjuege:


They are not your children, the stress will be on their parents. Provided they know what they are getting into, its still their decision.
I wouldn't advice 2 people with AS genotypes to marry, but if they decide to, i can only support them and wish them well. I will not try to control their decision and choice, I will not try all the drama the poster is trying to cause at all.
Someone has once told me, the solution to eradicating sickle cell disease is to kill all AS persons as they are the ones passing on the disease. I chose to believe he was joking, but who knows what such a person can do if given the power to. Your own solution is asking them not to marry, not as extreme but still can be taken too far as the OP apparently wants to, in his bid to have the HEALTHY (perfect) family.
You can advice and educate them on the trials sicklers face, the stress etc but that's all required of you.
I know a lot about sicklers, and i know some so dont think i don't understand where you're coming from

You sounded wicked and callous

OkoYibo:
Too many ignorant folks blinded by false religion and propelled by 19th-century information are just disgracing themselves on this thread.

Your brother doesn't need faith, he needs sound, professional, unbiased advice.

They can raise 5M to feed strangers at their weddings but can't raise 1.5M for IVF to ensure their unborn children are safe. Foetus Test at LUTH Sickle Cell Centre is almost 300K, they can't do that but can use the money for iphone instead of detecting the genotype of your unborn kid.

I'm AS, my wife is AS, we used a mix of faith and science. Let your bro try the test at LUTH if he can handle the consequences of an SS foetus. If not, he can try IVF.

Whatever he does, he must not gamble.

hi I sent you an email

dayooye:

only few people are really making sense here, a lot are damn ignorant. i am in the same situation with your brother, got to know about the AS thing after 3 years of courtship, we were kinda devastated and it was as if the relationship has come to an abrupt end. despite our grief at that moment we decided to seek medical help, got more informed and we indeed found out there is a way out. I sat down with both families and briefed them, everything boils down to MONEY. I am capable of handling the financial burden of either IVF or PGD and we are willing to take it to the next level as soon as she through with her NYSC. just as AA and AA marriage doesn't in any way equals to HAPPINESS, AS and AS marriage is not equal to DOOM. the key is to be well informed and make a sound decision.

hi, I know ds was years ago but did u guys later get married?