mheeen! This issue is serious, i fall under number 4 position ryt nw. She introduced me to her fiance as her best friend yes we dey do hunhun. (if u knw u knw). Infact i and her fiance has becom friend dat we cn do widaout calin oursef. I try to brake d friendship bt it hard. D friendship sef dey affect my marriage. I stil dey pray may God help me ooo

It's called Friends with Benefits aka FwB.


O pari

ImaIma1:


I am married and i have male friends

Nobody said all our friends have to be same sex.

Honestly am against the idea of keeping opposite sex as best friend, you cant gave a goat yam to keep it will surely eat it one day.

eagleeye2:
is it proper to ask a goat to look after your yams?

This bro just said it all.

TimeManager:

Sorry, Men make the rules, women follow. Since the begining of creation till the end, so shall it be. Men marry women and not the other way round.

kiss the rules!

LOL! It doesn't stop your wives from fùcking around, and bringing home the kids for you to train. So, keep making rules o.
While women keep running their show undercover.

#RuleMaker #StayWoke

TimeManager:

Imagine for a second that there were no rules, what do you think would have happened?.. Simple, basic rules abound, yet women hardly tame their whoring birds. Women are like electricity, the most useful yet most dangerous of all, they can destroy your life in a blink, thankfully, the Rules serve as an insulator. when they break the rules, they bear its consequences and we reinforce ourselves being men.
Men had since discovered this and are smarter to their tricks. .
women, with rules are snakes without rules they will be a day light monster.
Women always desire an atmosphere they can throw themselves around but unfortunately Marriage is not.
kiss the truth!

You sound angry. Calm down, your wife won't cheat you hear?

ImaIma1:
So what happens to her male friends she had when she was single?

Not everyone can handle it but i see nothing wrong with it as long as she knows how to manage it.

leave the male friend alone or mentain seriouse distance, guys na rattle snake waiting to strike if the babe jons

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dVM9CBVgcV4


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Keeping opposite sex as friends is risky especially when married

Trust me, you'll eventually breach "the boundaries". I have been there done that so I should know. You won't set out to do anything wrong but, if you two are real close friends, it would happen. Right now, I believe that PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURE.

Nobody is saying that you can't have any associates of the opposite sex but, for a married man or woman, having a really close friendship with a member of the opposite sex is not a very good idea.


O pari

victorian:
When there are set boundaries and self control between a married lady and her male friends , there is nothing wrong having a married male friend who believes in respecting his marital vows to his wife.
It's all about using the brain coupled with having a conscience.

safarigirl:
honestly.....see the foolish question.

So, married women should become loners because of a husband? Just because OP and his 'friend' who he had 'emotional sex' with have no discipline, he assumes everybody is a free giver.


Even female friends can mislead a married woman to commit adultery, the key is to marry someone with discipline and self control so you never have to worry about what they are doing with anyone of the opposite sex.


There is nothing like "mistake sex" anybody that is having sex is doing so because they want to. This use more to do with personal upbringing than general human behaviour.

Self control always fail when temptation set in continously.

Plus for the woman to stay faithful she must consider a lot of things:

She must always remember that all men want to hit the P.

He can't call frequently especially in the nights.

She can't start comparing him with her husband.

She shouldn't bad mouth her husband in front of her male friend.

She should tolerate her husband's female friends too.




She mu

AmiciLord:
OP come see one of dem here. Na dem be this. We don know you now.

Pls know me.

You guys only think of sex when with the opposite sex.

All my friends didn't evaporate because i got married and it's same for hubby too

kinibigdil:
What is even proper in relationship this days anymore, a lady said if she's dating or single depends on how her partner is behaving at the moment, No 3 is the problem of most relationships this days, wo Na olosho all of us go marry last last lol, Na who them catch be thief!

lol no be lie o because girls of nowadays na ashawo them dey do in the name of relationship. prostitution in another level

ImaIma1:
So what happens to her male friends she had when she was single?

Not everyone can handle it but i see nothing wrong with it as long as she knows how to manage it.

you can have a male friend as a married lady but distance should be maintained oo for safety's sake. The idea of some married ladies having long late night chats with dudes they claim is a close male friend or him taking u out for one thing or the order might lead to feelings or old feelings sparking off.soon u go start to dey compare him with ur husband...especialy if ur husband dey fuk up small.na so e dey take start.

ImaIma1:


I am married and i have male friends

Nobody said all our friends have to be same sex.

na calabar woman be dis.imaima1.....love love1

pocohantas:


They will soon develop high BP.
Married women shouldn't wear this, they shouldn't go here, they shouldn't work here, they shouldn't associate with males...

Na wetin?! Na prison abi marriage?

Very soon they'll say married woman shouldn't work with male colleagues, enter bus with male passengers...etc

Then stay away from marriage. Be a single mother who will not be under anyone.

WHy be in a marriage and still have close boyfriends.

Why marry ur husband when you know you are not best friends?

hotwax:
This topic has been controversial from time immemorial.

Here is my take on the matter. Feel free to express your opinions.
Based on my life experiences, I got to know that most ‘just friends’ friendship between opposite sex end up as a smoke screen. Below are what I observed.

1. Most guys will pretend to be ‘just friends’ with girls that turned down their sexual advance. They do this to stay connected with the lady in case opportunity will resurface again. They are like lions laying in waiting, hiding, monitoring a stubborn antelope. Some of them are masters of this pretence that the lady will not suspect anything. This lady will trust them to the extent of even sleeping in their houses.
At the end, these girls fall victim of forceful sexual intercourse, sex under influence of chemical/alcohol or emotional trauma.

E.g, A lady I approached sometimes ago, turned me down. We agreed to be ‘just friends’. One day, she had a disagreement with his guy to the extent of physical assault. She cried to my house. As we were talking through the night, one thing led to another, we had sex.
This is one major reason when my girlfriend tells me a guy is her best friend, I frown at it. In fact I can end that relationship because of it.

2. My uncle’s wife had a man friend ‘just friend’, which nearly rattled his marriage. She is always on phone with this man. They even go out to have dinner together. Even I was pissed off personally but could not express my opinion in someone else’s marriage. She was always playing the jealousy card. My uncle is jealous blahblah. The matter later came to an end when her parents called her to order. They told her that when a woman is married, the only best friend she should have is her husband. Her best friends before getting married should maintain distance if they are responsible except they are nurturing bad intentions too.

3. Young girls these days have mastered the art of queuing up guys. When they are in serious relationship, they friend-zones their toasters and keep communicating with them. When they have little disagreement in their serious relationships, they upgrade the next guy in the friend-zone to bed mate. They don’t make effort to make their failing relationship work because they know they have a queue of guys on their whatsap.

What they don’t realize is that these guys also moved on to the next girl when she turned them down the first time. So when the girl resurface again, they accept her as a bonus “extra p*ssy”. When the relationship breaks down again, they go on social media and rant on how men are dogs, men are liars, men cannot be trusted, they prefer to stay single. Anyways, this is out of scope for this discussion.

4. I had a girlfriend in the past, she made me realize we are not dating because she had a serious relationship. But we played one day and mistakenly had sex. And after that we had sex multiple times. And she keeps ringing it in my ear that we are not dating. She even introduced me to her man as her best friend ‘just friends’

In conclusion, I am not saying being friends with opposite sex is bad, but distance should be maintain if no-dating clause is there. Maintain minimum visits and contacts. Some guys will says “I can’t be taking you out to eateries, spending on you without getting anything back”. So girls, watch your back, nothing is free in freeland.

It's okay as long as they r not having sex..

abbacool:
Honestly am against the idea of keeping opposite sex as best friend, you cant gave a goat yam to keep it will surely eat it one day.

Speak for urself. Are you the type of guy that must have sex with every woman you set ur eyes on?

Ere kinni aja n ba ekun se?
It's better to stay away from things that could cause stories that touches the heart.

hotwax:


Then stay away from marriage. Be a single mother who will not be under anyone.

WHy be in a marriage and still have close boyfriends.

Why marry ur husband when you know you are not best friends?

I don't know why you are hyperventilating on my post.

It isn't you that will tell me not to marry, you are not the standard for men. So, keep this your under anyone to yourself and wife.

I responded to her post on women having 'just platonic friends'. Nowhere did I mention having a best male friend or close boyfriend. I have friends of both gender, I won't cut them off because of marriage. It doesn't affect you. No vex you hear?

It's wrong for u as a married woman to keep close relationships with other men. Men are men and will always take advantage of u anytime the opportunity arises.

You may think u guys are just friends but if it were possible for u to open their minds and see the lust in them na there u go fear men.

Your close male friends should be your brothers and cousins. Or families and no other. Even your Male business partners are not excluded. People no longer respect marriage in this generation. They sleep with any woman. If you like wear the biggest wedding ring for hand and neck dem go still wan do you. Even your husband's friends.

Just test one of those your male friends and see how they will fall like naira vs dollar.

ImaIma1:


Pls know me.

You guys only think of sex when with the opposite sex.

All my friends didn't evaporate because i got married and it's same for hubby too

Hanseel1:


Change your mentality , it's wrong.

We are in 2018 not 1980. It's people like you that can't stay in the same house with a lady without having sex with her

Maybe you should check the statistics of the rate of divorce in 1980 and compare with the rate of divorce in 2018, and you'll realize that modernity isn't always "progress".

To the OP,Karma go soon visit cos u have done it to others too

NOOOOOOOO

lefulefu:
you can have a male friend as a married lady but distance should be maintained oo for safety's sake. The idea of some married ladies having long late night chats with dudes they claim is a close male friend or him taking u out for one thing or the order might lead to feelings or old feelings sparking off.soon u go start to dey compare him with ur husband...especialy if ur husband dey fuk up small.na so e dey take start.

Any sensible married woman should know where to draw the line when it comes to friends generally, not to now talk of male friends.

Please you guys should relax. My husband doesn't even stop me from relating with them. He trusts me. And if i want to cheat, i don't need to have male friends to do so. If he acts too strict, he knows that i will still do it if it is on my mind to do.

AmiciLord:
It's wrong for u as a married woman to keep close relationships with other men. Men are men and will always take advantage of u anytime the opportunity arises.

You may think u guys are just friends but if it were possible for u to open their minds and see the lust in them na there u go fear men.

Your close male friends should be your brothers and cousins. Or families and no other. Even your Male business partners are not excluded. People no longer respect marriage in this generation. They sleep with any woman. If you like wear the biggest wedding ring for hand and neck dem go still wan do you. Even your husband's friends.

Just test one of those your male friends and see how they will fall like naira vs dollar.

They might not respect marriage but i do.

Besides, i don't just have any kind of twisted person as my friend and it takes me nothing to drop a friend if we don't fit.

hotwax:


But its quite unfortunate that 90% of men think about sex when they see opposite sex especially none blood relatives.

Friendship is best for same sex. But for opposite, care should be taken. Men can pretend for life.

FYI. This post is about "best friends" and not friends.

You can have many male friends who you dont meet or go out together. Maybe just at work or on whatsap. This is not in the scope of this discussion. We are talking about best friends.

I didn't get the survey o, how did you reach 90% ? You're those type of guys that paint all men to be thirsty, and its not every girl we want to fvck some of us recognize that friendship is okay, I have female friends I've never thought about fvcking not one day.

Karma don travel since my guy. Let's not wait for karma instead we should learn to do unto others what we would want others to do into us. With this you will learn to stay off married women or other people's girlfriends.

Seunnzy:
To the OP,Karma go soon visit cos u have done it to others too

Olalan:

BTW even as a guy once my female friend is married I immediately tone down on the level of communication

smart guy

Hanseel1:


But a man is allowed to have a best friend?

u nor dey read post? for married people nothing like best friends with opposite sex, married couples should be their own best friends.

Seunnzy:
To the OP,Karma go soon visit cos u have done it to others too

I no publish my house address na.