Avedonn:


OK Boss

always fascinated with your write-ups.

DanDeeBoss:
Why should I stay in a relationship with a Narcissist?? I haven't encountered one before....

Waiting for updates BTW

ubunja:
who needs a brain when women don't have one?

UyaiIncomparabl:


And how has that added massively to your pocket?

Avedonn:


OK Boss

always fascinated with your write-ups.

johnkey:
it's not a bad thing to think highly of one's self, especially if you have what it takes.

It's about classing yourself and keeping your circle really small.

More like a no love lost-no love found situation

Galaticos444:
most pretty ladies at narcissist probably cos dey feel dey can get away with anything

Elder0001:



Your all post says only one thing - you left him because he wasn’t releasing money


Why are you lots this stingy and useless ?? You that is complaining what did you help him achieve with your own money?

A relationship isn’t a one sided walk

funmisticqueen:
actually no. While that is true my ex is not the reason for this topic, besides that was a while ago. I left him in style. I had a spat with one of them on NL few days ago.

funmisticqueen:
Part 1- THE NARCISSIST.
Good day Nairalanders, I decided to start a series to help others in relationships to recognize red flags and seek help where necessary and also avoid placing themselves in such situations.

This series will be like an expose especially on some B personality types like narcissists, borderlines, sociopaths and psychopaths. The continuity of this series will be based on your feedback, so please share and comment, you may be helping someone.

Who is a narcissist? He/she is someone who has an excessive in or admiration of themselves simple. While everyone has some narcissistic Traits so that we have good self-esteem. It becomes pathological when you have narcissist qualities to high degrees and at the expense of others. These are the narcissists I am referring to. We’ll call tem Narcs for short.

Narcs are usually selfish, entitled (believe they are the best thing since sliced bread), grandiose (believe that they are bigger and greater than they are or someone they aren’t), arrogant, manipulative, shallow/superficial and most importantly lack empathy (do not consider other people's feelings). They constantly seek validation and have a need for continuous admiration by all to boost their self-esteem and ego because they can’t draw such from themselves. Any person, thing or environment that provides this ego boost in any form to the narcissist is termed “narcissist supply”. Status symbols like sports cars, wealth, beauty; a yes man or sidekick or arm candy, a beautiful lady in the midst of less pretty ones so that she stands out more and so on are prime examples of narc supply

Narcissism is a spectrum, but we will broadly classify them into two but keep in mind that they overlap. The overt narcissists and the covert narcissists. Overt narcissists are easier to spot. They are usually extroverts. Most CEOs and a certain president who called our country a shithole are prime examples. We all know that arrogant person who doesn’t care for other people’s feelings, or that high and mighty boss who doesn’t care or give you leave because your mother is ill. Or that bf/gf who always want to be the center of attraction, it has to be about them. When in a relationship with such a person they do anything to make themselves look good even belittling you and chipping away your self-esteem so that you want to be like them, it can go on for so long you don’t know what is real anymore. ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS ANYONE!
Covert narcissists are harder to spot, they have narcissist traits but hide it. They are experts of victim mentality, blame shifting, sabotaging and passive aggression. When in a relationship with such a person, you will always feel bad and not know why, everything seems perfect on the outside but something nags you and you can’t pinpoint the problem. If you feel such you might be in a relationship with a covert narc. They will make you feel bad on your birthday, or show fake concern if you are overweight. Some spiritual leaders, marriage counselors and therapists are prime examples, when you got to them they throw it back at you and tell you the problem is your fault. A covert narc may apologize for wrong doing, and promise to change but will go back to old habits soon after.

Narcs are not capable of sustaining deep intimate relationships where give and take is involved. They take and take until the giver is half of themselves. The relationship becomes 11/2 = 1/2 instead of 1=1 and sadly Nigerian upbringing is producing a lot of male covert narcissists.

So the question is should one stay or leave a relationship with a narc? That is entirely up to the person. Narcissists cannot be completely changed because it is a personality disorder. But something can be done which we will address in part 2. Please ask questions and feel free to share personal examples or your ordeals with a narc.
Cc

Mariangeles:
You're just one of his numerous puppets he manipulates !

Every nairaland male that agrees with that ubunja foreigner is nothing but a DISGRACE!

PIPnator:


I dont think living the scorpio way is being narcissistic.
A scorpio can really give their all without minding but what they hate most is anyone trying to take advantage of them, lie to them, play smart of them. They are true humanist when it comes to being human but can also be a cold blooded a**hole when crossed.

If you want to know zodiac signs that are likely (not all of them) to be narcissistic, then talk about Leos!

funmisticqueen:
actually no. While that is true my ex is not the reason for this topic, besides that was a while ago. I left him in style. I had a spat with one of them on NL few days ago.

Biglittlelois:


I'm afraid this is me exactly, I cut off relationships and friends like no man's business, and i'm Scorpio, I more or less don't have friends and I like my introverted self as it is, God help me.

ubunja:
yawn.

funmisticqueen:
actually no. While that is true my ex is not the reason for this topic, besides that was a while ago. I left him in style. I had a spat with one of them on NL few days ago.

Biglittlelois:


I'd like to know the ones on Romance, as for Family, say no more, one in particular starts with Elder

Biglittlelois:


I'm afraid this is me exactly, I cut off relationships and friends like no man's business, and i'm Scorpio, I more or less don't have friends and I like my introverted self as it is, God help me.

ubunja:
so nairaland males must agree with you instead?

funmisticqueen:
pray not too be with one oo. You can't change them

Mariangeles:
No, they must have minds of their own !

That defines a true man!

wickedworld:
Pls run they are bad news. They lied about everything, they are manipulative, makes empty promises a lot, their attitude is different from what they say, they will use u to get another supply, down grade u in present of family and friends, always taking and when is time for them to give u will be discarded.

They will discardu for a new supply after 2 months they will be back as nothing happened. Their wrong is always ur fault because they are perfect. They like show off, brag a lot, womanise a lot, drama king, they are mean, heartless, frustrating, control freak, stubborn, u will always feel like walking on egg shell in relationship with them, relationship will them always end bad, they think u don't deserve them in their head.
Etc

Once u know u are dating narcissist play them back with the mind of discarding.

You dey vex oooo

ubunja:
what does that even mean?

DanDeeBoss:
I am introverted too but not a sociopath....

ubunja:
so that mind of their own must never be in support of ubunja?

solasoulmusic:


I’m not trying to change him that is my point only 2 by 2 animals entered the ark the rest nko God saves souls just love if you sabi don’t diagnose you will commit yourself