Omoluabi16:
Freedom is life's great lie.

Very true.

crackhaus:
Has anyone here thought about how seemingly popular it is for 'liberated' women to want to exercise their liberation more in negative vices rather than positive ones?

- Men can be loud and talk about their sexual conquests, women should too. Liberation
- Men can sleep around and not be judged, women should too. Liberation.
- Men can be rude and not have to apologize for it, women should too. Liberation

Etc.

What happened to things like:
- Men have been the ones designing and building civilizations, women should begin doing this.
- Men go to space and walked on the moon, women should do that too.
- There are more male billionaires, women should aspire to this and match it.

Etc.


I just had to do this, despite my better judgment, because this is the substance I got from reading the OP, not what the majority of you are yapping about. I don't know what has happened to most women, but it seems a lot of you don't just have sense (pun intended).

Of course, those behaviours in men are equally bad...but in your so-called liberated minds, women should lower themselves to the same level of moral ineptitudes just to prove equality? Like are you people being serious?
Whatever happened to rising way above the negative things men can do/allowed to do and dignify yourselves by setting a new standard that should be emulated?

The regressive thinking being masked as progressiveness and liberation is astounding. May God help me to raise my daughter to not see men as her standard, but to set hers so men can then try to meet up.
The best way anyone should be able to do this is to build their personal library of books and literature from around the world.
If I were to ask how many of you have a library consisting of just 10 solid books with at least 500pages each, the lot of you will respond in the negative, yet you feel you know and understand anything. Where the hell then are you getting a deep knowledge of society and life in general from? From the internet? From just your own terribly limited subjective experiences?

Gosh this is becoming too much.
Ignorance has become the new fad, misinformation the new normal, simpletons the new intellectuals.

I rest.
Bukatyne take back your thread abeg.

The thread is going nowhere

I very much agree with you.

doitforyou:
If my daughter is a grown adult, she is now independent, I no longer control her life. If that's what she says she wants to do, I will be sorely disappointed

Why would you be disappointed? It's a profession. She gets paid doing what she loves She could even become world-famous.

but at the end of the day she is grown and she makes her own choices and she will also be responsible for the consequences. It still doesn't affect you though.

It does. Porn affects us. Want me to start reeling out effects of porn. It would not be if women were not licentious, if they were not told to do what they like because it's their bodies.

essenceplus:


Why did this not make FP. Damn hilarious Feminists won't allow any contrarian voice get heard. Shiny skull cococandy and the likes. DukeofNZ where you dey

The OP claims to be a feminist.

This has got nothing to do with feminism.

boldconfidence:


I do not always agree with your views. But on this one you are making a lot of sense.

Hahahahahahaha

ThothHermes:

It does. Porn affects us. Want me to start reeling out effects of porn. It would not be if women were not licentious, if they were not told to do what they like because it's their bodies.

the porn industry is male dominated but you decided to pick on the females
typical

spongeisback:
Exactly! Whenever Africans bring up culture and religion just know they're about to infringe on someone's right. If a woman wants to have sex let her have sex, if she doesn't let her don't. No need to shame anyone for their choice after all you won't bear the consequences with them.

Most people think of the communal effect of our decisions.

The society is affected if the family is broken down.

The OP is not even African.

I agree with you anyways: when a typical Nigerian man says he is an African man, the succeeding sentence is usually negative.

lol your daughter will be fine. Every generation says this about the new generation. The restraint, modesty and morality you speak of, was never what all women wanted it was forced upon women. The 'sorry' state is women now breaking free of that mold. I'd rather a society represent all women rather than some to uphold a false 'moral' society image.

Ishilove:

I completely agree with you. I look at the world today and feel fear coursing through my heart at the thought that i will have to raise my children in a society where restraint, modesty amd morality are on the verge of extinction. I also seriously wonder what happened. How did we come to this sorry state?

doitforyou:
hahaha another woman sleeping around does not affect you in any way. You just want to force your values on people. Mind your business.

What if your brother becomes interested in such a girl who after marriage still can't keep it in her pants and infect him with HIV or staph?

desvi:


the porn industry is male dominated but you decided to pick on the females
typical

Male dominated how
Men consume porn far more than women. Guess who they are watching

desvi:
you people need to do some reading seriously, alternatively watch some historical movies
people have since times immemorial been complaining about immorality and have been discussing ethical questions
it's nothing new
these the-world-is-going-down and society-will-implode have never come into being
people have committed terrible atrocities but not because people were expressing their séxuality freely, rather because they were suppressing it

Tell them my dear.
It was worst then.
Husbands will take official concubines. They call the courtesans. Wives will stay at home breeding, cooking and sowing clothes while courtesans, today's side chick will be at the court with the men learning the art of war, politics, literatures and what have you. Men go to their wives if they want to breed but when they need pleasure from the opposite sex, they go to these ladies.
Infact, mothers train their daughters to be official prostitutes. The men lavish these ladies with everything they can't give their wives yet now women have finally found their footing, they have become immoral and lost their charm abi mystique

Okay o.

ThothHermes:

Male dominated how
Men consume porn far more than women. Guess who they are watching

who runs the pòrn industry?
there are no male actors?
or do you only watch lesbian pòrn?

bukatyne:


My message has always been direct.

Yeah, sometimes.
Other times, no.

I pointed out one of your threads that was deleted. I saw it and NEVER bothered to click on it. Even when others were appealing to you that it was offensive, you still stuck to your guns. Till it was finally deleted.

This thread is another one on a less offensive note.

Let me tell you about you and “some” of YOUR THREADS.

In a nutshell, you are a closet misogynist.

E.O.D!

crackhaus:
Has anyone here thought about how seemingly popular it is for 'liberated' women to want to exercise their liberation more in negative vices rather than positive ones?

- Men can be loud and talk about their sexual conquests, women should too. Liberation
- Men can sleep around and not be judged, women should too. Liberation.
- Men can be rude and not have to apologize for it, women should too. Liberation

Etc.

What happened to things like:
- Men have been the ones designing and building civilizations, women should begin doing this.
- Men go to space and walked on the moon, women should do that too.
- There are more male billionaires, women should aspire to this and match it.

Etc.


I just had to do this, despite my better judgment, because this is the substance I got from reading the OP, not what the majority of you are yapping about. I don't know what has happened to most women, but it seems a lot of you don't just have sense (pun intended).

Of course, those behaviours in men are equally bad...but in your so-called liberated minds, women should lower themselves to the same level of moral ineptitudes just to prove equality? Like are you people being serious?
Whatever happened to rising way above the negative things men can do/allowed to do and dignify yourselves by setting a new standard that should be emulated?

The regressive thinking being masked as progressiveness and liberation is astounding. May God help me to raise my daughter to not see men as her standard, but to set hers so men can then try to meet up.
The best way anyone should be able to do this is to build their personal library of books and literature from around the world.
If I were to ask how many of you have a library consisting of just 10 solid books with at least 500pages each, the lot of you will respond in the negative, yet you feel you know and understand anything. Where the hell then are you getting a deep knowledge of society and life in general from? From the internet? From just your own terribly limited subjective experiences?

Gosh this is becoming too much.
Ignorance has become the new fad, misinformation the new normal, simpletons the new intellectuals.

I rest.
Bukatyne take back your thread abeg.

sassysure:


Tell them my dear.
It was worst then.
Husbands will take official concubines. They call the courtesans. Wives will stay at home breeding, cooking and sowing clothes while courtesans, today's side chick will be at the court with the men learning the art of war, politics, literatures and what have you. Men go to their wives if they want to breed but when they need pleasure from the opposite sex, they go to these ladies.
Infact, mothers train their daughters to be official prostitutes. The men lavish these ladies with everything they can't give their wives yet now women have finally found their footing, they have become immoral and lost their charm abi mystique

Okay o.

thanks!
great examples!

mystique

KanwuliaExtra:


Ok, my misunderstanding then.
Please, explain what “the mystique of feminism abi na femininity” means, so we do not lose it entirely.

I frankly do not understand what the author meant.

Stoop so low. . . ? How? By whose standards?

Interesting that you only felt put off by the contents of their discussion(chopping a HUGE DIIICCK after a good binging party ) ? I found it quite entertaining and HILARIOUS!

I was only irritated they were being loud in a movie theater, where people PAID to have some peace and quiet. I don’t give a ratzzzmatazzzzz what they were discussing. Knowing just “a little” about moi on or offline, . . . . I have done and acted worse EVEN WITHOUT A DROP OF ALCHHOL or a ANY form of DRUG! I still dey kamkpeeee for MY HOUSE with husband and all. Amen!!!!

So, do you and Debra McLeod claim some ethical or moral superiority over them, simply because they discussed your “taboos of social decorum or broke your rules of public etiquette” in a public place?


*btw, there is nothing that needs to be coded when talking about vaginas and penisees or getting a “real hump” in the real world. the women like those ladies in the article love to keep it real with their binges and orgies. no pretense necessary. my kind of women and men. if you don’t like them, leave them alone. they finally left the theatre right? no need to use others as examples for not meeting the “ holy standards of st. debra mcleod. . . . just saying, it is ok to phock, let phock and talk about it. i find such traits in men or women very refreshing from the perspectives of “sanctimonious prudes and emotionally-constipated hypocrites. -. . . . .

please dm dr. st debra mcleod to stop writing about “we women”. i find it very, terribly all-inclusive as a “woman”.*

She was talking about ladies with decorum, decent and ladylike.

See that she said the men would become gentlemanly.

Men would often put on their best behavior when they see a girl of class they like till they 'catch' her if their intents are not genuine.

There is a reason we have public and private parts. There is also a reason why the public is called 'public'.

Decorum and decency is expected.

And you would be shocked what decent people discuss with their friends and partners in private.

desvi:


but you don't get to decide for them
thank God

It is bad for every lady to aim to be classy?

exactly!!!! every generation complains about the next generation. We had the roaring 20s, the free love of the 60s, we had the hippie movement. When I was young my mom used to complain about my short skirts, then, when you look at her old pics from the 60s she wore shorter length clothes. These Instagram kids of today will get old, become conservative and start writing articles like this for the oncoming generation. Let kids be.

desvi:
you people need to do some reading seriously, alternatively watch some historical movies
people have since times immemorial been complaining about immorality and have been discussing ethical questions
it's nothing new
these the-world-is-going-down and society-will-implode have never come into being
people have committed terrible atrocities but not because people were expressing their séxuality freely, rather because they were suppressing it

Ishilove:

I completely agree with you. I look at the world today and feel fear coursing through my heart at the thought that i will have to raise my children in a society where restraint, modesty amd morality are on the verge of extinction. I also seriously wonder what happened. How did we come to this sorry state?

Social Media.

Prior to now, everyone was crazy in their space. Reference Sodom&Gomorrah, Noah's time etc.

The Bible even talked about homosexuality and wild/sin parties.

SM made everyone crazy in public.

With training and prayers, all will be well.

yes she is!! But she is a sly one.

KanwuliaExtra:

Yeah, sometimes.
Other times, no.

I pointed out one of your threads that was deleted. I saw it and NEVER bothered to click on it. Even when others were appealing to you that it was offensive, you still stuck to your guns. Till it was finally deleted.

This thread is another one on a less offensive note.

Let me tell you about you and “some” of YOUR THREADS.

In a nutshell, you are a closet mysoginist.

E.O.D!

desvi:


who runs the pòrn industry?
there are no male actors?
or do you only watch lesbian pòrn?

Men run everything in the world

A man is wired is hump any and everything.

Women can exercise far more restraint. The burden of decency should and rightly does rest far more on women.
The standards are not the same. Stop trying to make it the same. Just like the standard for achievements are not the same for men and women. This is why women are slut-shamed everywhere and not. It's physiology. Not society.

bukatyne:


Social Media.

Prior to now, everyone was crazy in their space. Reference Sodom&Gomorrah, Noah's time etc.

The Bible even talked about homosexuality and wild/sin parties.

SM made everyone crazy in public.

With training and prayers, all will be well.

bukatyne:


It is bad for every lady to aim to be classy?

first off, what you consider classy is for sure not what everyone else considers classy
I for myself find your obsession with sex on public display, pardon me, somehow repulsive on many different levels
but I am sure you think of yourself as classy

secondly, if every lady was the same, it would be boring, not bad but boring

desvi:


do you know what I find interesting?
in all the discussions about morals, it centers around women's séxuality
why?

Because that is the only space 'a woman can do what she wills' hold water.

Everyone other vice/moral debate is a crime.

There will always be standards. There will always be rules and acceptable/non-acceptable behaviour. This change and civilization we go on about is just excuse to lose our self control. Like crack house said, why the negatives and not the positives?
If a woman acts slutty and is being slut-shamed why does she seek acceptance or do the 'don't judge me' thing when the right thing to do is to stop being slutty! Same way Criminal yahoo boys are seeking justification. How many Nigerians defended Mr Naira Marley? Isn't bobrisky celebrated?
Perilous times.

ThothHermes:
Men run everything in the world

A man is wired is hump any and everything.

Women can exercise far more restraint. The burden of decency should and rightly does rest far more on women.
The standards are not the same. Stop trying to make it the same. Just like the standard for achievements are not the same for men and women. This is why women are slut-shamed everywhere and not. It's physiology. Not society.

you are a disgrace to manhood

bukatyne:


She was talking about ladies with decorum, decent and ladylike.

See that she said the men would become gentlemanly.

Men would often put on their best behavior when they see a girl of class they like till they 'catch' her if their intents are not genuine.

There is a reason we have public and private parts. There is also a reason why the public is called 'public'.

Decorum and decency is expected.

And you would be shocked what decent people discuss with their friends and partners in private.

Sure. It should be a private discussion, away from the “prim and proper”! Totally agree.
But, should they be used as examples for mysoginistic outlets and subjectified as “deviants”?

sassysure:


Tell them my dear.
It was worst then.
Husbands will take official concubines. They call the courtesans. Wives will stay at home breeding, cooking and sowing clothes while courtesans, today's side chick will be at the court with the men learning the art of war, politics, literatures and what have you. Men go to their wives if they want to breed but when they need pleasure from the opposite sex, they go to these ladies.
Infact, mothers train their daughters to be official prostitutes. The men lavish these ladies with everything they can't give their wives yet now women have finally found their footing, they have become immoral and lost their charm abi mystique

Okay o.

Low-born ladies
Would these men you speak of have allowed their own daughters to be courtesans to other men?

bukatyne:


Because that is the only space 'a woman can do what she wills' hold water.

Everyone other vice/moral debate is a crime.

off point
why don't you open a thread for a change where you can preach to your brothers?
majority of women here disagree with you and after your "I encourage rape" thread, the ship has left the harbor where you stood a chance to make a difference
and nobody buys into your "I want to save society" narrative
on NL?

All these hypothetical questions mean nothing. My brother is a grown man, I would hope he would have sense to make decisions that are best for him. This world is huuuggee! for every woman that sleeps around there are 10 more that want to wait till their wedding night. We are not going to force women to be what they are not because you don't want to 'taint' the pool when my brother is about to get married. A former prostitute can be a faithful wife while a woman that was a virgin on her wedding night can be an unfaithful wife.

bukatyne:


What if your brother becomes interested in such a girl who after marriage still can't keep it in her pants and infect him with HIV or staph?

desvi:


you are a disgrace to manhood

In other words, you have run of gas. They are less ridiculous ways to admit that though.

doitforyou:
You are still missing the point no one is encouraging people to do anything. You have to understand that people are different, my morals are not your morals, what you and the writer are doing is imposing your own morals on others. I wouldn't bash a woman that is sleeping around even though that is not my MO because 1. It is not my business 2. She can do whatever she wants, that is not encouraging. Previously set morals was set by men, women now no longer want any part of that and just want to live their lives. However, you are free to still uphold those values and morals no one is stopping you don't just expect other women to join you.

I wasn't even thinking of sex.

I remember a discussion about tattoos with some friends. One said a guy's tattoo was nice and she liked it. When we told her to tell hubby to get it, she instinctively went 'God forbid, her husband or kids would never have tattoos.'

Like we say in Yoruba: were dun wo, ko she bi lomo.... A mad person's display is sweet/fun to watch however no one wants to have a mad child.

Like the Whites say: Imitation is the best form of flattery.

On another note, I find it funny that women who previously confide in each other about their sexcaspades would use same thing to insult them when all goes south.