9PBLIVE:
please unban me

Yaronorthside:
it's called the Pygmalion effect

Or Rosenthal

Ladycewhy:
Funny how one guy with an alternate account he uses for begging money here ,has an opinion on this topic

Attack the message not the guy. He's arguing from his own myopic experience.

pansophist:


My uncle (a very wealthy guy) married a poor but stunningly beautiful woman. Let me just say that if it's not because he had three kids with her, he will divorce her straight up. Surprisingly, his mother (my grandma) saw through the girl from day one and hated her, but beauty and a need for a trophy wife led him to such leech of a woman.

Infact her family are living off him, and every attempt he made to make her financially independent was refused. She will rather watch reality tv and expect him to bring money for every single thing. It's a sad tale.

To know if your gf is a leech, ask other women, they are skilled at seeing through themselves. Stay away from broke ladies, they are time bomb awaiting explosion.

From. Exhaustive research I have.made over time. That your uncles scenario is a recipe for disaster.

First thing a man should check in a prospective spouse is a woman that will add value to a man.
Men that marry such women never get lost in life. And they help raise the children born into such homes to be also resourceful.

The true wealth of a man is the woman you married into your house.
If a man makes that mistake, he will die as a miserable man even if he has all the money in this world. The only exception is If God blessed him with a child that is wise, some men can be fortunate.
But if not, he will end up with no legacy despite his wealth.


That's why elders in African culture don't joke with marriage of there children.
They will so much scrutinize so much.
Because they understand the importance of who you end up with as a spouse.
But if one neglects there counsel.
It always end in regret and gnashing of teeth.

Cases are different anyway

Because we have seen it all, we now understand that money doesn't buy happiness and its all but vanity.

djon78:




From. Exhaustive research I have.made over time. That your uncles scenario is a recipe for disaster.

First thing a man should check in a prospective spouse is a woman that will add value to a man.
Men that marry such women never get lost in life. And they help raise the children born into such homes to be also resourceful.

The true wealth of a man is the woman you married into your house.
If a man makes that mistake, he will die as a miserable man even if he has all the money in this world. The only exception is If God blessed him with a child that is wise, some men can be fortunate.
But if not, he will end up with no legacy despite his wealth.


That's why elders in African culture don't joke with marriage of there children.
They will so much scrutinize so much.
Because they understand the importance of who you end up with as a spouse.
But if one neglects there counsel.
It always end in regret and gnashing of teeth.

True. By de facto, they have actually divorced but not in the court of law. The only thing that bind them together are kids. They live separately and the kids are partitioned weekly like poultry chicken between both parents, and he make sure he funds her materialistic lifestyle so she could at least be a good mother to his kids, that's the lesser evil he is willing to bear.

And what strikes me is the mentality in these kind of women. One would expect that a woman with such caliber of a man should be a good wife, industrious and compliment him seamlessly, but her leechy behaviour can not change. She even lacks the consciousness to see that she is a drain to her husband, and corrections are seen as hating her. Any young man reading this, stay away from leech.

Yeah. It happens like that. Girls from poor homes want to be rich, they want to be seen to be rich. And they feel a man must be able to cater for her financial needs all the time, and if he doesn't, then they shift to the next person who will. Who ever will love you will love you, regardless.

victorian:








I'm so happy my self .
His advice has opened great doors I never imagined I will walk in and be accepted as one.
I have genuine friends in high places I can't count on. This lockdown opened my eyes that I'm truly loved beyween the low class and high class . I'm so grateful.
God knows I am.

I'm very happy for you

pansophist:


True. By de factor, they have actually divorced but not in the court of law. The only thing that bind them together are kids. They live separately and the kids are are partitioned weekly by poultry chicken between both parents, and he make sure he funds her materialistic lifestyle so she could at least be a good mother to his kids, that's the lesser evil he is willing to bear.

And even strikes me is the mentality in these kind of women. One would expect that a woman with such caliber of a man should be a good wife, industrious and compliment him seamlessly, but her leechy behaviour can not change. She even lacks the consciousness to see that she is a drain to her husband, and corrections are seen as hating her. Any young man reading this, stay away from leech.

My elder cousin(son of my dad's elder brother) God so much blessed him in marriage.
In fact we were discussing concerning marriage recently and he told me that God saved him. He dated 3 girls not the same time. It was in the first one that my dad his uncle gave him clue on how to spot the right woman because his dad was then late.
The first two were entitled, no vision, not resourceful kind of women. But they were drop dead gorgeous. The advice guided him. He now met his wife not as gorgeous as the first two.

In his word he told me if he had married one of those first two ladies he would have been dead by now.

After marriage, he was comfortable. By the time his first child was coming, he lost everything, rock bottom, couldn't even afford house rent or feeding. But his woman was there for him, supported him.

Things began to turn small, today 4 kids, very rich, has a big factory that employs over 80 people. The guy is a huge multi millionaire. If you see how this woman runs her home and kids. Dude bought her a mad high range SUV last year.

He told me that he would have been dead if he was married to those entitled ones. During that his trying moment.
He doesn't play with his wife. Doesn't even womanize with all his money.

tommyken:
Since I entered the dating world I have been in relationship with girls from both rich homes and poor homes and I have observe something that intrigue me not only in my relationship both also those of my friends.

The ladies I have dated from rich home tend to be very grateful when you get them even a little gift or help them with a little favour. They tends to appreciate such favour with a very sincere heart and are very grateful to you.

Now this seems the opposite with girls from poor or simply lower income homes, I observe that girls from such poor and average home tend to be very entilted, selfish, insatiable and very ungrateful when you do things for them and they are the first to dump you when you begin to experience financial difficulties.

If you have come across this observation feel free to say your opinion and discuss the reason why its so. As for me, with what I have gone through in the hands of girls from poor home I have decided to marry a lady from a rich or at least a high income well to do home.

What i think is bad with dating a non rich girl, is when u are giving her money, she kinda somehow feels that u are proud because u are giving her money or buying her gift that one day u will use it again her. it is at the back of her mind and when she has an opportunity she will say it to ur face. because u buy me stuff that us why u think... i just broke up with on, and i made a mistake in my write up, "it has been a good ride and u enjoyed every bit of it", i was talking about myself in the statement, the U should hv been I, i even corrected myself, but she has seen what she wanted to see all this while, and then boom, she throw everything in her mind. it is all good. she is a good girl, when i say good i mean, good. But that not been able to fend for herself yet because her parent isn't all that well to do, makes them hv this fear or low self est. i don't know. maybe we will get back when she is done with school, and working and getting money.

Skmoda360:

the ones wey go collect the little cash you have in your savings na them full ground now oooo

mad man

Skmoda360:

the ones wey go collect the little cash you have in your savings na them full ground now oooo

mad man

Samanza89:


I think this writeup was directed to me. Mehn! Bless up bro. You're the kind of person I like associating with, this has always been my perception and I'm ain't changing it for nothing. Bless up man...

Wow. Thank you for those kind words bro. Bless up!

SwagPower:

You really are a classic man..

Thanks brother!

NinjaMetahuman:
well written.


Don't normally post in romance section but I just had to quote this.

Very succint.

Thank you brother.

sirzee1660:
well said bro...thank you I hope i can put this advice on my love life .... because right now am dying of heart break

Brotherly, I understand. Many guys have gone through it.

Keep screening the wrong ones out. You’ll get the gold you desire. Don’t ever settle for less in a woman cos You are also gold, yourself.

Farki:


Wise words you need this.

Wow Brotherly! Thank you!

carpdiemz:




I swear you have said it all , have dated a girl from a very poor home and I was thinking I could help her through my own status not that I’m from a very rich home but I have the ability at hand to changed her life, I later found out she was sleeping with her boss husband in the company she works I wanted to end d relationship dem she cried apologize dat it has been going on before she met me that the man helped her to rent the apartment she lives in , same girl dat I would make sure she get all the money she need for transportation for a week and for feeding too and she’s collecting salary oh , she’s not giving me money oh cuz she doesn’t earn much , with all dat she insisted dat we should have a court wedding I was like did I owe u money why court .... that was how i ended the relationship oh it’s obvious that poor girls from poor backgrounds will give you headache dan girls from rich homes , I would rather have headache with a girl from rich home dan a girl from poor home . When we were having d fight dis girl was still telling me how much have I even done for her how much are my giving her I was like

Can you imagine her guts! She still get mouth. Good thing you dumped her. A broke girl with huge pride and huge sense of entitlement makes a problematic wife. She is a cankerworm.

Girl from a rich home:

She was well taken care of by her parents and has seen it all. The things people do ocassionally to treat themselves right are her weekly experience. She is chauffer driven and shops like normal life. She has seen real love and learnt how to give it freely. Her problem is now how to get someone who would love her and treat her right

Girl from a poor home:

She has been deprived of so much. Now she wants to visit places and get things that only exist in her fantasy. She wants AC, nice room, plenty outings and shopping, because she only saw those things on TV or perhaps experienced them scantily.

Chatflick:

Guy you killed it like seriously. In fact I don copy the last paragraph. Mad gan

Thanks bro. Cheers!

chinchonglee:
Never date a girl from a poor home...

That's my number 1 rule and I ll never break that rule.

I did and its still causing me headaches till now bro , she has a crazy sense of entitlement, she knows to many rich men, loyalty from her is like a mission impossible, and sometimes rubs it at my face that there are many people out there that can help her better then I am, well I'm currently still fcking and and using her to a while away time till I'm totally done with her .

Biglittlelois:

All this for me?

professore:

Spot on

Thanks Prof

Iif u take a girl who eat out a regular basis to a date... Let's say kfc as per normal naija parole. She is likely to be more appreciative...not for the food but for the company and care u showed.

But if u take a poor girl... She will be more interested in the amount of ice-cream you bought or the size of the bucket chicken so she can brag to her friends. So no matter what you do...it will never be enough. She doesn't care about the talks or the company.

crafteck:


I wish i read this before i got into relationship, you are on point

Wow. I’m honoured. Thank you.

abelwealth:
fours bottles of palm wine for u

Brotherly thank you

tommyken:
Since I entered the dating world I have been in relationship with girls from both rich homes and poor homes and I have observe something that intrigue me not only in my relationship both also those of my friends.

The ladies I have dated from rich home tend to be very grateful when you get them even a little gift or help them with a little favour. They tends to appreciate such favour with a very sincere heart and are very grateful to you.

Now this seems the opposite with girls from poor or simply lower income homes, I observe that girls from such poor and average home tend to be very entilted, selfish, insatiable and very ungrateful when you do things for them and they are the first to dump you when you begin to experience financial difficulties.

If you have come across this observation feel free to say your opinion and discuss the reason why its so. As for me, with what I have gone through in the hands of girls from poor home I have decided to marry a lady from a rich or at least a high income well to do home.

The reason is very simple...
Must girls from poor family expect their future spouses to be their gold mine while majority from rich/middle class just want to maintain status quo.

djon78:



My elder cousin(son of my dad's elder brother) God so much blessed him in marriage.
In fact we were discussing concerning marriage recently and he told me that God saved him. He dated 3 girls not the same time. It was in the first one that my dad his uncle gave him clue on how to spot the right woman because his dad was then late.
The first two were entitled, no vision, not resourceful kind of women. But they were drop dead gorgeous. The advice guided him. He now met his wife not as gorgeous as the first two.

In his word he told me if he had married one of those first two ladies he would have been dead by now.

After marriage, he was comfortable. By the time his first child was coming, he lost everything, rock bottom, couldn't even afford house rent or feeding. But his woman was there for him, supported him.

Things began to turn small, today 4 kids, very rich, has a big factory that employs over 80 people. The guy is a huge multi millionaire. If you see how this woman runs her home and kids. Dude bought her a mad high range SUV last year.

He told me that he would have been dead if he was married to those entitled ones. During that his trying moment.
He doesn't play with his wife. Doesn't even womanize with all his money.

From experience, a male criminal can change, he can retract his steps, stop criminalizing and live a honorable life, but it doesnt work in the same way with women. A woman that has slipped into the cult of parasitism can never be satisfied, redeemed or retract her steps. She can only be satisfied as long as the money is there, and will be extremely bitter when it doesn't go her way. Her standards has been aimed so high that it can only go higher, not lower, using men as an utility.

Your relative is lucky, I stan him. In my uncle case, he is not. He is a good man, a genuinely noble man that is not only wealthy but handsome. With women chasing him even though he is married. He never lacks women, but he made the wrong mistake choosing one. Think of Ramson Noah, he looks just like that. He has specifically warned me and my brothers not to go for looks, and gladly, we never did. We both have partners and they have supported us when we are down. The current breed of naija women do not support men and if it happens that I become single tomorrow, I'll hardly go into a relationship with what I'm seeing.

You cant trust the so call poor girls they re something else they have nothing to offer apart from sex and they will make their smelling puuussssy look like no other puuusssy else where if i have a chance with a rich babe Am done ,to hell with poor girl with their fake lifestyle they cant get enough of whatever you do to help them fools

pansophist:


From experience, a male criminal can change, he can retract his steps, stop criminalizing and live a honorable life, but it doesnt work in the same way with women. A woman that has slipped into the cult of parasitism can never be satisfied, redeemed or retract her steps. She can only be satisfied as long as the money is there, and will be extremely bitter when it doesn't go her way. Her standards has been aimed so high that it can only go higher, not lower, using men as an utility.

Your relative is lucky, I stan him. In my uncle case, he is not. He is a good man, a genuinely noble man that is not only wealthy but handsome. With women chasing him even though he is married. He never lacks women, but he made the wrong mistake choosing one. Think of Ramson Noah, he looks just like that. He has specifically warned me and my brothers not to go for looks, and gladly, we never did. We both have partners and they have supported us when we are down. The current breed of naija women do not support men and if it happens that I become single tomorrow, I'll hardly go into a relationship with what I'm seeing.

Yeah a parasite can never change.
Yeah current breed are something else. Very mean and callus. They don't mind throwing you under the bus to get there desires. Only knows money not the work behind making it. With few exceptions though, but rare.

OmoAlakija:


I did and its still causing me headaches till now bro , she has a crazy sense of entitlement, she knows to many rich men, loyalty from her is like a mission impossible, and sometimes rubs it at my face that there are many people out there that can help her better then I am, well I'm currently still fcking and and using her to a while away time till I'm totally done with her .

you better run...before she knows your secret and tie you down with pregnancy

desmond2pk:
I once paid for my girl friend's visa, tickets, bta and everything i bought for her like cloths, hairs and shoes.
She came from the poorest of the pours. Her dad was an old blind man.
When she got to the u s , relationship was smooth until she started work and got herself a boy friend. She told me off. Insulted me like nobody has ever done and will ever do.
She was the most humble girl i have ever met before then.
I learned my lesson the hard way. There is no good girl from a poor family. Not even a single girl.
What humbles then is poverty . As soon as you let them shine, they show you their characters.
The poorer the evil

When dating a broke gal u need to be extra careful, there is 100% chance of u unintentionally or intentionally buying her love. Even if ure not out to buy her love it's automatically plays out that way if u start flashing ur money on her and even helping her rather than building her values and ur relationship. At the end of the day instead of her seeing u and a bf she starts to see u as a sponsor or benefactor.

It can only work if ur intuitive u will immediately know her mindset shady and either abort and forget it or let her know ure with her to buy her love like she's already thinking. This stuns her smwhat innocent pretense and shifts her mindset abit more positive and different. She will know u know her plans or tendencies.