Bro. most ladies here will not really tell you the truth because if it was against them you will hear all kinds of insults. Meanwhile I will tell you that God heals people with the same virus time without Number. If you and her actually believe in God, she can be healed. If you truly love her from your heart, never you disclose the situation to any of your family member neither your friends. Put your trust in the Lord and if you try this, you’ll have the best home ever. I wish you well God bless you.

For my opinion,don't tell anyone that she is HIV +ve .After giving birth,it's not a must that she will breast the baby,by the way some lady I know didn't breast her baby because she doesn't have nipple ,even as people were asking her to breast the baby,she ignore them and didn't tell them reason..it's only her husband my friend that told me..And they have been using baby's milk ,if you see their children looking healthy and plump....my dear let her use baby's milk.

secure the services of a wet nurse ready ahead of her delivery . tell every curious relatives or friends that the baby refuse to latch on her biological mothers breast from the hospital , i'm sure doctors can help you out with one genuine medical term for such . say it with a straight face and your wife should be staring straight at them too when you 're explaining .God , i'm an evil genius . please OP take the advise of the person that said you should never tell anyone in your family no matter how close you think the person is to you . you are among the very few that have risen above stigmatisation and believe me our society is not ready . you have a family to look out for now and people talk .

Crazeman03:


Yes I truly love her and she feel thesame way. Though she till have doubt and always feel insecure about me. She believes one day I will walk away.

I don't think hiv is the issue, I think u are having your doubt about her, like u don't love her as u claim to.

Don't tell anyone. Even if you tell them, what will it contribute to your marriage. Nothing. Thank God HIV is not a death sentence again. Let her be taken her drugs. With the current drugs now, no problem. When she give birth. You people can use formula. My son didn't take breast milk because, breast milk didn't come out earlier. We use formula, and he is very healthy. Love your wife and enjoy your marriage. Make sure she takes her drugs and always check her status and viral load. God bless you

Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

You're a real man.
You don't need to disclose her status to anyone it's confidential. I once had a patient that's + and her husband was -. She has three kids with him and he's still negative . Go and marry her if you truly love her.[color=#000099][/color]

Bros your wife can breastfeed her baby. Being HIV + doesn't mean she can't breastfeed. In HIV treatment, there's what is called Prevention of Mother to Child Transmission (PMTCT). She just needs to adhere to instructions (counselling) that's all... Bros there are many serodiscordant couples out there living a very happy life. BROS SHE CAN BREASTFEED HER BABY.

YoungPerson:
They say too many cooks spoil the broth but I'll give you my two cents.

Don't tell anybody. Not even your sister. Make your life as private as possible. If you try it, you will know the true meaning of stigmatization. Even if your family eventually warms up to you (some will never), the truth will out everywhere to your extended family. You won't be able to attend family functions, etc. Don't start an interfamily village people standoff.

Even if you have to, start your family first. Let the child come into the world. If they can reject your child along with you, then they can f**k off. Simple as ABC.

you're the real deal bro

Eulalia:
You'll soon know what you're doing to yourself. That lust that is making you not to reason well will soon disappear and then reality will strike you.. Continue.

Your posts are rigged of Hypocrisy, you preach God and Love but spite another for loving a human being unconditionally. Isn't that what christ preaches? He's trying to make it right by settling down with her and seeking advice but you advise against it, because she's HIV+ and should be casted into hell. This is why the judgement of God will begin from the church, you should be ashamed of yourself!

luminouz:


I like the way u think on this issue...though the story might be fake

Lol
I feel same too, nevertheless their are people with good sense of reasoning.. anyways, I'm just here too read sensible comments

Ones i know that you are HIV positive no matter waitin you do my penis no go even stand not to talke of digging. You try sha but for me i can't come and kill myself by myself. Shikena

fool!

I will advise you now and I will advise you again,DON'T TELL. IT'S YOUR FAMILY, KEEP IT SAFE AND LET IT REMAIN BETWEEN YOU TWO ONLY

Bros your wife can breastfeed her baby. Being HIV + doesn't mean she can't breastfeed. In HIV treatment, there's what is called Prevention of Mother to Child Transmission (PMTCT). She just needs to adhere to instructions (counselling) that's all... Bros there are many serodiscordant couples out there living a very happy life. BROS SHE CAN BREASTFEED HER BABY.

Crazeman03:


Thanks for the insult. The third I tested since we've been having sex was march and I'm still negative.

if you don't want ogun to kill you don't tell anyone if it's possible God wey dey heaven he must not know about it because your yeye go plenty for community....

Pls and pls don't let any entity know

Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

go to a reputable government health centre, she can breàstfeed without transmitting the virus to the child. I don't support this type of relationship as stated in the scriptures. but for sanity sake, do the needful to legalise the union.

Crazeman03, I am not in a position to advise ..u know better. Just go with the flow.. who are men to Judge?

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN;

signs and symptoms of hiv:

as early as 2-4 weeks after exposure to hiv, people can experience an acute illness, often described as "the worst flu ever". this is called acute retroviral syndrome, or primary hiv infection, and it's the body's natural response to hiv infection. during primary hiv infection, their are higher levels of virus circulating in the blood. which means that people can more easily transmit the virus to others.

symptoms of hiv include:
1.) fever
2.) chills
3.) rash
4.) night sweats
5.) muscle aches
6.) sore throat
7.) fatigue
8.) swollen lymph nodes
9.) ulcer in the mouth

sin will give you as much pleasure as it wants you to have, but its always waiting for the time to break your life apart.
what goes around comes around!!!

Why will you even tell anybody your gf is HIV+. If I were you, I wouldn't tell anyone cause people out there are still ignorant about HIV.


Also, thanks to science, your gf can breastfeed your baby without passing the virus to it.

wah dee eye juz read ................... no comment

Vivuch:
please she can breastfeed her baby, but the rule will be exclusive breastfeeding and no additional of baby formula, anytime she gives that child baby formula that will be the day she will stop breastfeeding the baby, please meet a qualified health professional for more advise.

please OP find out about what the person quoted wrote here . really hoping he is right . best wishes .

Remaboy:
[s][/s]
I advise you not to pay heed to an uncouth person
Cc Crazeman03

Eweleke! Big girls dey com beg 1k for Nairaland. Just imagine these things without shame....be forming nonsense

Crazeman03:
Thanks to everyone who contributed positively, will follow your advices. We went to see a doctor for consultation in General Hospital, I was told thesame things no one's needs to know and she can breastfeed also. And it's Good since she open up to me. He Even went ahead telling some stories about some Gene who can't contract the virus and also most ladies don't tell there partner even when the married ones because they believe there viral load is low and can't pass on the virus.

If your viral load is very low and undetectable, there is zero chances of passing the virus. . If undetected=untrasmittable.

sha don't tell anyone

ZaineGrainger:
[s][/s]

2nd account today

smh

Crazeman03:


They will ask questions.

I really admire how open minded you are concerning this issue. Your girlfriend is blessed to have a good man like you and because of this, she'll never intentionally do anything to jeopardize your relationship if you decide to marry her. You shouldn't disclose her status to anyone. This must be a secret between yourselves.If they ask why she isn't breastfeeding , tell them she has Hepatitis and that the doctor advised against it.

Am not blaming you but you made a choice cos you loved with your eyes closed you had a warning sign but you ignored it . It would have been better if it was in the UK cos you will be receiving free treatment and cancelling . You gambled with your life . If you truly love her and you love people around you that you dont want them to lose you then you should have been having protected sex with her and forget about having children together what you did was suicide

Adesamogun:
Advisers. Our People will say. Person wey never die no know wetin go kill am.
Oga let me just say this there are 2 sides of a coin. Every Lady has a problem she carrying about. Some Nagging, some family issues and problem. Everybody has their own wahala. Na part of your own be this. Don't tell anyone except you so so so trust their judgement. About breastfeeding. Na that one small pass. At least she is likely not to cheat. Keep yourself safe too by ensuring she takes her medications since you no use protecations. Seek further counselling from Sensible/correct Elders

so you're trying to say our own elder is not sensible

Crazeman03:


Yes I truly love her and she feel thesame way. Though she till have doubt and always feel insecure about me. She believes one day I will walk away.

If the love you have for her is real, pls contiue loving her, try and erase that doubt in her that "someday you will move on"


Love is a very delicate feeling, if you leave her at this stage, she may not survive it.

May GOD continue to protect and provide for all your needs, as long as money for medication is not an issue, she will continue to be fine...

Work towards your marriage and make it as simple as possible...

As per what people will say about her not breastfeeding the baby... Pls seek medical advise, there is a way around it I believe.

And pls try as much as possible to keep her status top secret.

Bravo bro.

As a doctor, Since her cd4 cou t is high, she can deliver safely preferably thru cs, den abt breastfeeding, its up to u both to come up with something on why she is unable to breadtfeed. However, new research shows that she can breastfeed up to 6month. Note that it will obly b exclusive, u musnt mix it wit anyoda thing like water,etc. She needs to visit any healthcare were she will be advised further. Succesz to u both

Bros, there's no course for alarm, both of you can live a normal life. She can breastfeed the baby exclusively for six months while she and the baby take med and instructions given to her for the baby safety. Do her the favour of visiting the hospital where she enrolled for drugs for your questions. Bet me notting will do your baby if she adhere strictly to instructions. You call my number 08055146835.