Jannuxajj:
I am an introvert that is into programming and I work for companies from home. I became tired of all the gold diggers I was attracting because I discovered they are only looking for sponsors so for the first time I made up my mind to start approaching.

I saw a young lady walking towards me so I decided to start with her. I greeted her and immediately she answered I didn't know what to say next thing I said was are you coming from the gym and she said no and looked at me somehow only for me to stammer and then ask for her name she just ignored me and was pressing her phone.

It bad to be sitting indoors everyday I swear loneliness dey kill me.

You have just broken the yoke ! Now,don't go back into your shell again man.

Lols, what she did is just to taste your courage,....is even better she ignored you, she just opened the floor for you because you don't expect her to talk to you as a friend, the rigidity is a welcomed sign

That girl no know the thing she missed. Imagine a programmer!!!!

The money you'll spend on her and lack of cheating sef, because you go dey house scatter. Hope you find a better woman that matches your character.

its a fresh start..dont kill urself over it.to make it easier for urself just hit on any of the ladies u familiar with that catches ur spec than hitting on a total stranger.not saying anything is bad hittin on a stranger as long as u dont sound like a perv..but u could make it easier on ursef by first hittin on the ladies u familer with

I hardly approach any girl I meet on the road for the first time. It's not that am shy or not confident but it's not just my style. The only time I will break my own rule is if am not likely to see her again then I can just say hi and ask for her number sharpaly without being emotional about it.


As a matter of fact I can't even remember the last time I toasted a girl, and I have regular sex with different women. My guys call me slow poison cos they don't understand how I run my matter, we start up as platonic friends and before you know it I don collect.....It has been working for me since my secondary school days until now, I don't stress myself when it comes to women.

Jannuxajj:

No am a Java programmer

pls what is d difference between a web designer and a web developer?
pls no vex

kukusdot:

At several points in your life, "konji" will appear. You need to learn to keep in check and hold yourself in check. Never let konji dictate whether you approach or do not at approach a woman. In fact, when you ever get into a relationship, never let sex dictate what you do or do not do. Unless you'll just be under the control of a woman forever. You need to be able to turn down sex when a woman offers it. You need to show you are not crazy about it, bro. Don't become a tool.

Love this. God bless you Chief

nice try bro.

Approach another one next time, you might hit it

Jannuxajj:
I am an introvert that is into programming and I work for companies from home. I became tired of all the gold diggers I was attracting because I discovered they are only looking for sponsors so for the first time I made up my mind to start approaching.

I saw a young lady walking towards me so I decided to start with her. I greeted her and immediately she answered I didn't know what to say next thing I said was are you coming from the gym and she said no and looked at me somehow only for me to stammer and then ask for her name she just ignored me and was pressing her phone.

It bad to be sitting indoors everyday I swear loneliness dey kill me.

.

starpower:


Lol, my first trial was worse, saw a pretty lady at Ojota Bustop, she was actually nice but i was too anxious. Told her my name is D...., she replied with her name and i couldn't hear clearly. Mumu me forgot i got headphones on with music. She gave me the are you serious glance. Was 17 then, 2010. I moved on.

Jannuxajj:
I am an introvert that is into programming and I work for companies from home. I became tired of all the gold diggers I was attracting because I discovered they are only looking for sponsors so for the first time I made up my mind to start approaching.

I saw a young lady walking towards me so I decided to start with her. I greeted her and immediately she answered I didn't know what to say next thing I said was are you coming from the gym and she said no and looked at me somehow only for me to stammer and then ask for her name she just ignored me and was pressing her phone.

It bad to be sitting indoors everyday I swear loneliness dey kill me.

Which kind of serious girl presses phone when you are talking to her?

Doesn't it worry you that she might be a chewing gum girl?

Jannuxajj:
I am an introvert that is into programming and I work for companies from home. I became tired of all the gold diggers I was attracting because I discovered they are only looking for sponsors so for the first time I made up my mind to start approaching.

I saw a young lady walking towards me so I decided to start with her. I greeted her and immediately she answered I didn't know what to say next thing I said was are you coming from the gym and she said no and looked at me somehow only for me to stammer and then ask for her name she just ignored me and was pressing her phone.

It bad to be sitting indoors everyday I swear loneliness dey kill me.

Most people are introverted. You met an introvert like you so you should expect nothing more than awkward situation . We're all afraid to fvk up that's why we don't try. I am an introvert and I'm not proud to be but I know to come out of it entirely it takes a lot of civilized nature, intelligence and self exposure else you'll start acting like a fool. Nevertheless I'm working on myself too.

Easy route MONEY
Money conquers all, so just make money.

Jannuxajj:

Wow it really exposed how weak I was with women

next time introduce a more friendly approach, probably target someone at a business place and go in such a way it looks like you are in need of her services, strike a conversation immediately before the transaction buh plz try and convince her conscience that you actually need her services first and let your topic be the one that portrays you as intelligent, updated or funny, and please dress well and smell nice, the next girl you'd attempt wouldn't need further convincing whether you are her spec physically or not. Thank me later.

Jannuxajj:

I will try but the truth be say woman no dey my mind but konji one kill man

then u will keep getting rejected and dejected. Why stress yourself if you're looking for friends with benefits. Why can't u just find friend with benefits. U can easily pick up girls at strategic locations. That's olosho. No decent girl will give u audience if they can smell you're all about sex. Na why u still dey single. Get sense

Jannuxajj:
I am an introvert that is into programming and I work for companies from home. I became tired of all the gold diggers I was attracting because I discovered they are only looking for sponsors so for the first time I made up my mind to start approaching.

I saw a young lady walking towards me so I decided to start with her. I greeted her and immediately she answered I didn't know what to say next thing I said was are you coming from the gym and she said no and looked at me somehow only for me to stammer and then ask for her name she just ignored me and was pressing her phone.

It bad to be sitting indoors everyday I swear loneliness dey kill me.

are you in Lagos ? if yes then it's ur fault bro

Must u f**k?
Carry Ur d**k and preach d word of God anytime e stand up!

Girl wey reject you today go give you number tomorrow. Na to no give up.

BuddhaPalm:


This is good...

The lesson from this is that there is no danger at all. Nothing will happen if a girl rejects you.

If you look at it logically, you were not intimidated by the girl, but your brain "panicked". So you need to condition your brain to not see it as a big deal.

And you can do this by approaching many girls and showing your brain that you will not die. Then it'll calm down.

Have u rejected a lady approaching u b4. Do u knw how she feels. This days lady only approach rich guys

shawnfamous:
Bro u even try pass me.. I no even get guts to approach women for road.. Something must connect us before I go say I wan even follow person wey I nor know dey yarn

Na so. Approaching random gal on de way doesn't make sense. We way get shop na dem de approach us

Jannuxajj

After much thought I decided to write to you.

Listen, speaking from a girl perspective... That street toasting is the most annoying thing ever.

Generally we see guys who do that as nuisance, that's why she decided to continue with her phone. Typically In a day an average Nigerian girl will get toasted by 5 guys, maybe even 10. (OK maybe I'm exaggerating) but my point is the figures are quite high.
And in our head ( or my head...) Any guy who sees me looking fine and start to do the usual, he is just being disrespectful because I believe he most have tried about 5 other girls before coming to rudely interrupt my day.

If you are in an environment that the mood calls for socialisation and you meet someone you like, you can try to make a conversation. But a random girl on the street that you don't know how stressful her day has been, you just come out of nowhere and rudely interrupt her like that. Come on.

Nopanties:
All these people saying "never give up" is he pursuing a Nobel prize abi Balon d'or

Imagine.
Wizkid has four babaymamas.

Lmao.

Try giving compliments to ladies you like first. Ladies like to be told they look nice, they are beautiful, their hair do is nice etc.

I was an introvert like you and my first approach of a girl was almost like yours. I saw this girl in the secondary school. She attended a girl school in town and I told her that she was beautiful. She smiled and I said "can I talk to you" .
"Yes" she said and she excused herself from her friends. She came to me and the next thing was, I did not know what next to say.
"Will you pass here tomorrow?" I asked and that was all I could say. She looked at me and smiled.

"Yes" she said

"OK, I will see you tomorrow," I said.

What do I want to say tomorrow that can't be said today na shyness to worry me.

The next day I don rehearse tire for house.

She passed same place the next day and I said to myself "if na die you go die, you must talk like a man today"

She walked past and I said "hello" she stopped one time.

I said "mo daran! O. How I go talk today" she was waiting. And I walked up and I said, "I just want us to be friends I like you,"

Gbam!

She looked at me and laughed. "Is that all you want to say? Its OK no problem"

Ehehehe!

Na so I become a boyfriend o.

But you know one thing. I was very handsome in those days. Very handsome.

That must have been what won me the girl. No be my confidence. The confidence no too dey like dat .

Since that day, if you like, fine pass Agbani Derogo.

I go say my mind. The worst is you go say "No" and I no go die because of that.

Start by giving compliments!

dont worry is normal, especially in this country.

Everybody wey no get confidence go say him be introvert..
Chai.. Real introverts don suffer.

Go out brother. Go out. And try again!

Once again, go out!

eniolaamos7:

It's not that you don't know how to approach ladies. But what you are lacking from my own personal experience is "why do I need her?" Even if I successfully persuade her, what do we from there? If your mind cannot answer these questions then you, then you will certainly still feel reserved.

Although i haven't gone through the whole thread, this is the 1st sensible comment. Others are giving him advice as if he wanna get laid. He said he's looking for a wife, a life partner. Although there's no particular standardon "how to find a wife", just randomly walking up to any stranger you find physically attractive is like jumping into a river you haven't entered b4 and don't know it's depth and nature... A recipe for disaster.

I will advise against just walking up to just any lady.

Mr man, one thing life has taught me is that YOU CAN NOT PURSUE BEAUTY AND POWER AT THE SAME TIME. Most guys giving you advice are womanizers(although i don't judge people, since everything has it's advantage and disadvantage) and they are extroverts, hence their style and your style ain't the same, trying it their way may make you start on a faulty foundation.

Shey other introverts and programmers dey marry? as long as money dey your pocket to start family. But if you ain't ready for it please stay through to building a successful career. That's the most important thing to your future wife and kids. There's a woman for Every kind/class of man. You'll meet her along your path to fulfilling your destiny, most men always do.

You said you are tired of girls looking for sponsor? country hard my brother so no blame them. All the same, avoid idle/jobless but materialistic ladies, but also know that a woman loves/sticks with a man based on his ability to provide(security). But the koko is WHAT ARE THEY OFFERING? apart from their body and children?

Good luck

... same here... I don't toast ladies, they do the toasting and I still naively mess up in my response 95% of times..
Too bad.

Jannuxajj:
I am an introvert that is into programming and I work for companies from home. I became tired of all the gold diggers I was attracting because I discovered they are only looking for sponsors so for the first time I made up my mind to start approaching.

I saw a young lady walking towards me so I decided to start with her. I greeted her and immediately she answered I didn't know what to say next thing I said was are you coming from the gym and she said no and looked at me somehow only for me to stammer and then ask for her name she just ignored me and was pressing her phone.

It bad to be sitting indoors everyday I swear loneliness dey kill me.