Lol BB there were times them go dey sing am for my ears ''oko lover'' just say yes or no if you wan do or not .

True. I also lashed out at dayokanu the other day sef. There was this  thread uju opened for her friend. The friend got dumped by her traditional husband(them don do the brideprice thingy)she moved out of her parents house and lived with him for 4years, no wedding no nothing. Anyways the guy dumped her at the end of the day and you needed to see the way dayo was jumping around calling her ''mugu'' wey the guy chop clean mouth. Just for him after a few days time to accuse women of being heartless for chopping men's money and running away from the relationship and how women have rendered a lot of men broke and how they dump the men and go for richer guys and so on and the minute I saw his response on the thread my mind wandered back to uju's thread. It is ok to call a woman whose 4 years have been wasted for nothing(although I called her cheap and loose) and who traditionally was already married ,a mugu? but now that it has come to women chopping guys money, the men have practically become victims,serously

Stay in your marriage and die, work things out and bla bla bla. Does it ever occur to these people that it takes 2 to make a marriage work? work hard on your marriage bla bla bla, the million dollar questions is: what if the second party is not ready to make it work? arrrrggggggggggggggg someone get me pammy abeg before my BP rise reach heavens.

jennykadry:

Lol BB there were times them go dey sing am for my ears ''oko lover'' just say yes or no if you wan do or not .

True. I also lashed out at dayokanu the other day sef. There was this  thread uju opened for her friend. The friend got dumped by her traditional husband(them don do the brideprice thingy)she moved out of her parents house and lived with him for 4years, no wedding no nothing. Anyways the guy dumped her at the end of the day and you needed to see the way dayo was jumping around calling her ''mugu'' wey the guy chop clean mouth. Just for him after a few days time to accuse women of being heartless for chopping men's money and running away from the relationship and how women have rendered a lot of men broke and how they dump the men and go for richer guys and so on and the minute I saw his response on the thread my mind wandered back to uju's thread. It is ok to call a woman whose 4 years have been wasted for nothing(although I called her cheap and loose) and who traditionally was already married ,a mugu? but now that it has come to women chopping guys money, the men have practically become victims,serously

Stay in your marriage and die, work things out and bla bla bla. Does it ever occur to these people that it takes 2 to make a marriage work? work hard on your marriage bla bla bla what if the second party is not ready to make it work? arrrrggggggggggggggg

I tend to agree with  Dayokanu a lot of the times, but i disagree with his stance in Uju's friend's case, she was married to him according to Igbo customs, the rest were mere formalities, so she was not a mugu or a cheap LovePeddler. Although commonsense should have kicked in when the guy first told her it was over and handed her back to her parents, and then having the nerve to demand for the brideprice he already paid, tufiakwa, that man will be yekini-less by the time I am through with him


Like I said earlier, Naija marriages na do or die affair where women are reduced to glorified wombs, it was even better in our father's times, at least they snuck around and tried to hide it when they wanted to cheat, unlike now that these men of our generation act recklessly with inpunity and no sense of remorse whatsoever, making it feel like they did you a favour by marrying you and for this honour, women have to serve and worship them for the rest of their lives


I blame the women especially our Mothers for not knowing their worth and our worth and raising dysfunctional children in violent abusive homes, who grow up and history starts repeating itself. One thing I have learnt over the years is that a man that wants to misbehave and stray will misbehave regardless of the woman's temperament and attitude, and the same man's senses can start to function properly once again enough to make him sit up and start loving his wife again, whether the wife is the submissive type or return fire-for-fire type, so I don't get where all this "ladies you have to mollycuddle him to death whilst you forget your own emotion, feeling, need to be loved, etc and forget that you are human" ish is coming from oh


No one is saying women should start demanding 50-50 in relationships and marriages, but Nigerian women need to grow some backbone men. Read some story in the papers today how some Indian women went to burn one beer making factory because they were fed up of complaining to the Government that their Husbands were turning into drunkards and neglecting them, and the Government was doing nothing about it, lol Ladies after my own heart i say

dayokanu is from agenebode. I rest my case

^^^

He will say anything to get into your pants, though in your own case he needn't have to do much - just buy you goat milk from those Austrian Mountain or was it buy you some sunscreen to protect your skin from the sun whilst lounging on the Austrian mountain drinking goatmilk and watching bleating goats shitting



Hmmm, who is the bigger flirt between Dayokanu and Fsstranger, chei, ha ha

^^^
What need I do to get into your pants.



I am a good licker, FYI.

no let me enter you dis night o. Leave me and my goats alone. And it was not Austrian mountains it was the Italian country side

Busy_body:


I blame the women especially our Mothers for not knowing their worth and our worth and raising dysfunctional children in violent abusive homes, who grow up and history starts repeating itself. One thing I have learnt over the years is that a man that wants to misbehave and stray will misbehave regardless of the woman's temperament and attitude, and the same man's senses can start to function properly once again enough to make him sit up and start loving his wife again, whether the wife is the submissive type or return fire-for-fire type, so I don't get where all this "ladies you have to mollycuddle him to death whilst you forget your own emotion, feeling, need to be loved, etc and forget that you are human" ish is coming from oh
 

Thank you oh! I don't get that either.

I want to preface this by saying I mean no offense to anyone on this thread, just want to add my two shiles.

I’ve been following this topic since the OP first started and decided to stay out of it because. . . well because in the matter of marriage and whatnot I’m still a novice. However I’ve noticed a reoccurring theme that concerns me and it's this Communication is the key answer that people keep dropping.

Now I’m not saying communication doesn’t work, I just don’t think it works all the time.  One of the first things they teach you in any communications 101 class is that for it to be effective, you must know your audience. From knowing your audience, you can decide how to communicate or if even communication is warranted at all.

Another thing they’ll teach you is the basic rules for effective communication in any interpersonal relationship. . .
1) it is respectful. 
2) It is quantitative.
3) It is a two way street
4) It digs deep for more insight
5) It is HONEST.

Based on the above, can we honestly say there’s room for effective communication in the situation OP has described? I mean how do you communicate with someone who verbally abuses you at every turn? How do you communicate with someone who spends more time talking to other people about his marriage than he does with the person in the marriage with him? How do you communicate with someone who believes their word is law, someone who thinks your opinions don’t matter? How do you communicate with someone who doesn’t think he has to answer your questions or concerns? How do you communicate with someone who changes his mind willy nillyingly and just expects you to kowtow to it? In short. . . . HOW DO YOU COMMUNICATE WITH AN UNREASONABLE PERSON? HOW?!!!! 

Despite  everything he’s done sef, we can see OP is still her best to communicate with him. . . sadly, it is a waste of time because dude isn’t stepping up to the plate and playing his part to get the communication process going. . . until he does, OP might as well be communicating with a rock.

So please, let’s cut out the canned, little house on the prairie, Leave it to Beaver type responses and start getting real here.

fstranger3:

^^^
What need I do to get into your pants.



I am a good licker, FYI.

Akoba adaba, olorunmaje ari Abeg commot road make i see front jare, you think say i no know say na that amazon Tpia you get the hots for and you are suffering from unrequited love and you are only here to use me for practise runs O ba furo e for trying to pass on Tpia's ajeku to me

Outstrip:

no let me enter you dis night o. Leave me and my goats alone. And it was not Austrian mountains it was the Italian country side

I was right about the goat milk though

Sisi_Kill:

Thank you oh! I don't get that either.

And the most annoying part is the men know this too, and also know they can get away with murder

Busy_body:


Akoba adaba, olorunmaje ari Abeg commot road make i see front jare, you think say i no know say na that amazon Tpia you get the hots for and you are suffering from unrequited love and you are only here to use me for practise runs O ba furo e for trying to pass on Tpia's ajeku to me

Tpiah? Nah? Olorun maba temi je

I tried busting a nut with her picshure, i wasnt able to.

But with your picshure, if i try once, I nut multiple times, on average like 5-o-r-g-a-s-m-s back to back

Thats how I know you are the one.

Again, what need I do to debedebe for reals

@Sisikill You just hit the nail on the head.

That was why I asked the one million dollar question: What if the other person is not ready to make it work?

She's been told to be patient, communicate and stuffs and that was why I asked on the previous page: has she not been communicating before? has she not been patient b4? has she not tolerated enough? talking to such men is like talking to a 2 yr old baby that only wants to jump around and play instead of listen to mum's ''silly instructions''

BB leave outstrip alone please. something tells me outstrip will be sipping a glass of rain water and also seeing the italian abi austrian country side  in no distant time from now

fstranger3:

Tpiah? Nah? Olorun maba temi je

I tried busting a nut with her picshure, i wasnt able to.

But with your picshure, if i try once, I nut multiple times, on average like 5-o-r-g-a-s-m-s back to back

Thats how I know you are the one.

Again, what need I do to debedebe for reals

Were tutu ni e, let Tpiah catch you Sowwy my hands are full this weekend till Easter sef, but I know the perfect woman for you, she is free, single and always gagging for it - presenting my identical twin Sister Jennykadry, its your lucky day too that the solitary confinement cell in yabaleft opposite to Jenny's is vacant. Is this fate or is this fate Ori lo ma porun, what God has joined together

Busy_body:


Were tutu ni e, let Tpiah catch you Sowwy my hands are full this weekend till Easter sef, but I know the perfect woman for you, she is free, single and always gagging for it - presenting my identical twin Sister Jennykadry, its your lucky day too that the solitary confinement cell in yabaleft opposite to Jenny's is vacant. Is this fate or is this fate Ori lo ma porun, what God has joined together  

[size=2pt]Did you get my text? You no dey even show face anymore. Try to get intouch. . . . how are my "men"?[/size]

Busy_body:


Were tutu ni e, let Tpiah catch you Sowwy my hands are full this weekend till Easter sef, but I know the perfect woman for you, she is free, single and always gagging for it - presenting my identical twin Sister Jennykadry, its your lucky day too that the solitary confinement cell in yabaleft opposite to Jenny's is vacant. Is this fate or is this fate Ori lo ma porun, what God has joined together  

Please if fstranger can't get me a range rover please let him waka and by the way I need men that are willing to wash my gstrings like debo. Oh how I regret sacking debosky sagamite is doing a good job at it anyways. Good combo. Saga and fstranger washing my gstrings in my bathroom

Busy_body:


Were tutu ni e, let Tpiah catch you Sowwy my hands are full this weekend till Easter sef, but I know the perfect woman for you, she is free, single and always gagging for it - presenting my identical twin Sister Jennykadry, its your lucky day too that the solitary confinement cell in yabaleft opposite to Jenny's is vacant. Is this fate or is this fate Ori lo ma porun, what God has joined together  

^^^

We shouldnt drag this to the point where 'ikubabayeye, igba keji oosa' would have to be the one to settle it for us.  Even if your poosie hand is full this week, what about the backside?

I dont mind?


What say you?  Ma gbe oja ile lo si ta.  Je ki awa are ile yo before ki ara ita to taste eeeeee

Ileke-IdI:

Did you get my text? You no dey even show face anymore. Try to get intouch. . . .  how are my "men"?

How do I even interpret this

Busy body, wetin be this?

fstranger3:

How do I even interpret this

Busy body, wetin be this?

Simply put, it means 37 outta my 67 e-lovers are ladies I believe in equal opportunities so yeah, i bat for the other side too, so sorry, "that place you mentioned" is reserved for my ladies only

Ileke-IdI:

[size=2pt]Did you get my text? You no dey even show face anymore. Try to get intouch. . . . how are my "men"?[/size]

Awww babe, I miss you tori torun Sweetie, I will make it up to you when I see you babe

Don't worry about this fsstranger dude, he ain't got nada on you, emi ni ti e ni to to forever and ever

jennykadry:

Please if fstranger can't get me a range rover please let him waka and by the way I need men that are willing to wash my gstrings like debo. Oh how I regret sacking debosky sagamite is doing a good job at it anyways. Good combo. Saga and fstranger washing my gstrings in my bathroom

ROFLMAo, struggling to get the image of them two outta my head, I can picture Sagamite standing over Debo and calling reeeeetard for not mastering how to wash the skid marks in your thong

jennykadry:

BB leave outstrip alone please. something tells me outstrip will be sipping a glass of rain water and also seeing the italian abi austrian country side in no distant time from now

Buahahahahaha

Busy_body:


Simply put, it means 37 outta my 67 e-lovers are ladies I believe in equal opportunities so yeah, i bat for the other side too, so sorry, "that place you mentioned" is reserved for my ladies only




Awww babe, I miss you tori torun Sweetie, I will make it up to you when I see you babe

Don't worry about this fsstranger dude, he ain't got nada on you, emi ni ti e ni to to forever and ever


ROFLMAo, struggling to get the image of them two outta my head, I can picture Sagamite standing over Debo and calling reeeeetard for not mastering how to wash the skid marks in your thong

Buahahahahaha

Lol keep trying to make fstranger jealous. . . . omo yen dangerous. e rora.

Didn't even read he beats you too. . .oh well. Who beats a pregnant woman? Who dey train these kind men?
I hope as a housewife you were saving really hard. . .

jennykadry:

@Sisikill You just hit the nail on the head.

That was why I asked the one million dollar question: What if the other person is not ready to make it work?

She's been told to be patient, communicate and stuffs and that was why I asked on the previous page: has she not been communicating before? has she not been patient b4? has she not tolerated enough? talking to such men is like talking to a 2 yr old baby that only wants to jump around and play instead of listen to mum's ''silly instructions''

BB leave outstrip alone please. something tells me outstrip will be sipping a glass of rain water and also seeing the italian abi austrian country side  in no distant time from now

I guess those clamouring for communication meant that a line of communication should be kept open, I guess, so I am with them on this, communication is paramount and vital in a relationship and it can be verbal as well as non-verbal. I especially love those times when one's Husband reaches out to hold you sometimes for no reason, sometimes to steady you from falling, I love the way they stroke you or squeeze your fingers to allay one's fear, i love the way they leap out of their chair, reach out to kneel in front of you, help you put on your shoes because you are pregnant and they don't want you to stress yourself bending down, I love the way they subconsciously help sweep your hair away from your face, I love the way you can use your eyes to communicate across a crowded room, making it look like you are the only two in a room, I love the way they sense you are down and not your usual self without saying a word. . . okay I will stop now


I was reading the story thinking hmmm, does she even love the dude, because all she was harping on about was her career, career, career, but my respect for her grew when I saw where she wrote this about her Husband that  "u meet some people and u just endeared and start talking, get flowing, feel free in their presence and i keep wondering where it all went wrong". . . that when he is in a calm mood he tells her he is only being prickly because he is proctective of her . . . that he compliments her that she looks good after 3 kids . . .awww


Based on this, these couples do not have a problem with verbal communication per se, the dude did not clam up after the wedding date and withdraw into his shell, infact if anything, the dude is guilty of over-communicating in the sense that he has difficulties in holding back some stuffs he is supposed to hold in, such as calling her an ingrate, labelling her a witch, etc.


They do not have a problem communicating, they just need to recalibrate their communication to be the same wavelength.


Where the wires started getting crossed was that yes they both agreed she would continue working after marriage, but her Husband persuaded her not to work and she heeded this for 3 years, but then something suddenly pinged in her brain and her voice took on a diffferent tone and she started "nagging" him that he was betraying her trust in him, and he feeling hurt started lashing out that she was an ingrate, that what is the point of her working if she could not afford the car he bought her if she saved all she earned in 5 years, blah, blah, blah. . .


She honoured his wishes for 3 years and recently decided to change and be more vocal in searching for work. And she has started getting irritated, with the husband wondering where the attitude is coming from, fearing and wondering if he had lost her, wondering why the sudden change in her attitude, and possibly wondering if some bad friends have been advising her. . .


He was probably a possessive person from the word go, and I am sure if the OP had paid extra attention, she would have see instances of this possessiveness or he might have mentioned it briefly as well during those courtship period, like Sweet T mentioned. So now she is feeling stifled that her whole life is wasting before her eyes and all the extra qualification she paid and toiled to achieve is just at home gathering dust.


Now this is the part where communication plays an important role, the Husband has dropped a closeminded clanger which she can wisely rebut by texting stuffs to prick his conscience and permeate his brain that she is the victim here, such as "God sees my heart that I signed this marriage covenant for better for worse, you pledged in front of people to be my head, my crown, my rock, a place I could lay my weary head, my significant other, a place where I could be myself . . .lay on the sentiments thick and fast, let him know he is the only man you love, the Father of your beautiful children . . .yet he was at the helm and the one responsible for bringing strangers to your home to label you a witch, leaving you nowhere to hide or anyone to turn to. . . lose the emphasis on the job, and avoid referring to your daughter's health, just concentrate on the fact that he accused you of being behind his predicament. . .open yourself to him . . .get as raw as possible, you need to get the wound out in the open to heal the hurt . . .you still have something worth holding on to . . . just keep talking to him, get yourself on the same page with him. Don't give up yet, trial seperation if not planned well . . . well, i wish you the best of luck.

Mrs D.O Fagunwa

Ileke-IdI:

Lol keep trying to make fstranger jealous. . . . omo yen dangerous. e rora.

Why are you refusing to blow me an e-kiss because of f[b]stranger[/b] o ga o, abi you secretly fancy him ni

dayokanu:

Mrs D.O Fagunwa

Hen ehn, so Ileke-idi is gunning for the role of Mrs Fagunwa No wonder she has started acting cold on me, not picking up my calls, talking in hush hush tones God save her say he nor rich, I for snatch him from her to add tomy e-harem if nor be say hin be Author

Busy_body:


Why are you refusing to blow me an e-kiss because of f[b]stranger[/b] o ga o, abi you secretly fancy him ni

Who doesnt anyway?

BB,

Heard you and your second are having a competition on who go born pass.

Abeg I am having an argument with fstranger, Are those water melon inside that red top really 44DD, Show us proof

Busy_body:


Why are you refusing to blow me an e-kiss because of f[b]stranger[/b] o ga o, abi you secretly fancy him ni



Hen ehn, so Ileke-idi is gunning for the role of Mrs Fagunwa No wonder she has started acting cold on me, not picking up my calls, talking in hush hush tones God save her say he nor rich, I for snatch him from her to add tomy e-harem if nor be say hin be Author  

[size=2pt]LOL I no dey miss call. How someone go call me at 2pm on weekend. Hello, "Sleeping in Progress"?  Even Dayo no get balls to wake me up that early
Fancy fstranger? ta lo fe HBP?[/size]

Ileke-IdI:


LOL I no dey miss call. How someone go call me at 2pm on weekend. Hello, "Sleeping in Progress"?  Even Dayo no get balls to wake me up that early
Fancy fstranger? ta lo fe HBP?

You swallowed my balls, now I need the ones in BB blouse

Busy_body:


Why are you refusing to blow me an e-kiss because of f[b]stranger[/b] o ga o, abi you secretly fancy him ni



Hen ehn, so Ileke-idi is gunning for the role of Mrs Fagunwa No wonder she has started acting cold on me, [size=18pt]not picking up my calls[/size], talking in hush hush tones God save her say he nor rich, I for snatch him from her to add tomy e-harem if nor be say hin be Author

You can call me anytime.

I will pick up your call. I dont sleep anyway

Whats your phone number, s'ooko

dayokanu:

You swallowed my balls, now I need the ones in BB blouse

Dayo, can you plz not quote me and type stuff like that? Thanks.
Kila gbe kila ju?

Ileke-IdI:

Dayo, can you plz not quote me and type stuff like that? Thanks.
Kila gbe kila ju?

A gbe epon, A ju oyan, next question?

fstranger3:


Who doesnt anyway?

Ngbo Ileke-idi [size=14pt]But but but i still love you ileke[/size] Baby mi jowo ko ma ilo oh

dayokanu:

BB,

Heard you and your second are having a competition on who go born pass.

Abeg I am having an argument with fstranger, Are those water melon inside that red top really 44DD, Show us proof

Busybody20 don overtake me longtime, me i only born 27 pere, i nor get ojukokoro unlike her, na every 6 months she dey drop load, we stopped counting at 48 because i suddenly remembered won o ki nka omo fun olomo


44DD   44 would be a UK size 16/18 or US size 12/14 wearer. Hmmm, na size 8/10 frame, so na size 34

@ dayo
Whatever. Annoying.
I'm going to ignore you until you calm down.

Busy_body:


Ngbo Ileke-idi [size=14pt]But but but i still love you ileke[/size] Baby mi jowo ko ma ilo oh

Iyalode, tiyin gan ga.

I love the two men I have already. Greet them for me

Busy_body:


Ngbo Ileke-idi [size=14pt]But but but i still love you ileke[/size] Baby mi jowo ko ma ilo oh



Busybody20 don overtake me longtime, me i only born 27 pere, i nor get ojukokoro unlike her, na every 6 months she dey drop load, we stopped counting at 48 because i suddenly remembered won o ki nka omo fun olomo

I hear the last time you went to pee and came back with a baby, Anyway Have mercy on the world population.

Just 5 women like you made China the most populous country in the world UK better beware

44DD   44 would be a UK size 16/18 or US size 12/14 wearer. Hmmm, na size 8/10 frame, so na size 34

Pictures are worth a thousand words or I can use my hands to measure and compare