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What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? - Romance (10) - Nairaland

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Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by superCleanworks(m): 2:06pm On Mar 14, 2022
humility33:


I can affirm to what you just wrote

One does not know what is a petroleum refinery sef
Some ladies eehh they even equip themselves

Bros the country is filled up with them. Many girls don't know how many states we have in Nigeria. That is why God gave them make up and wig to cover all their rubbish empty heads so most men can overlook them
Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Nobody: 2:09pm On Mar 14, 2022
Wittyduchess:
They hate when you see through them. The snubbing is also part of the manipulation ,they have various ways of "guilt tripping" and they see the "silent treatment " as a powerful control tool.


More people need to ba aware of narcissism, gaslighting and emotional manipulations because ,there are more damaged people out there devolving everyday and developing dangerous personality disorders detrimental to sane and normal socialization and relationships.

Manipulating and guilt-triping a SO is fair and proper in a normal, healthy heterosexual relationship. Girls your type are your own worst enemies - being too smart for your own good. The tendency to overthink and overanalyze every damn thing.
I mustn't be a narcissist to feel uneasy if some smart-arse chick thinks she has me all figured out. Maybe it's just a question of a bruised ego. The "silent treatment" as a powerful control tool? Maybe the poor guy is just sulking or simply steering clear of a toxic person?

At the emboldened, it really takes one to know one darl. You really need to look in the mirror.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Kobojunkiee: 2:14pm On Mar 14, 2022
CorGier:
1. Manipulating and guilt-triping a SO is fair and proper in a normal, healthy heterosexual relationship. Girls your type are your own worst enemies - being too smart for your own good. The tendency to overthink and overanalyze every damn thing.

2. I mustn't be a narcissist to feel uneasy if some smart-arse chick thinks she has me all figured out. Maybe it's just a question of a bruised ego.

3. The "silent treatment" as a powerful control tool? Maybe the poor guy is just sulking or simply steering clear off a toxic person?

4. At the emboldened, it really takes one to know one darl. You really need to look in the mirror.
1. Please explain what you mean by the statement in bold abeg. Manipulation in a healthy relationship? The professionals and experts out there are all screaming "HELL TO THE NO" -\

2. A bruised ego or low self-esteem? undecided

3. You have a point but even those of us who use the silent treatment in that way know it isn't necessarily the best way to handle such situations though. undecided

4. Just because I am able to spot bullsheet from afar does not mean I am swimming in it. undecided

3 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by okanume(m): 2:15pm On Mar 14, 2022
if you don't Gerrit, forgerrit��
shagasha:
After chatting for a long time on FB, she came with two of her friends the day we were supposed to meet.

The four of us shared on pack of juice and I left. Never picked her call again

1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Crafteck1: 2:19pm On Mar 14, 2022
Prechgold1180:


Omo I don’t have to deal with much fuel

I have constant electricity 20 hours a day should be called constant

Some days we get 20 hours a days why some day we get 24 hours

We only go out of light when the transformer is faulty
But it doesn’t exceed one day

Asin I am shocked

Somewhere in Edo state

Thou things here are expensive but we Dey manage


Ahhh... In this Nigeria.... I swear my heart is broken.... When our supply was CONSTANT on my part of lagos mainland we were having like 10 hours, those were the good old days.
Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Kirkman: 2:21pm On Mar 14, 2022
Bestcreamreview:
He asked me to come to Lagos to see him during the weekend, told him I couldn't because I had an exam the following Monday so my weekend was for studying, and besides no normal student travels during exam period, he ended the call angrily and ignored my messages for days.
You don't say? Which kind nonsense vex be that one nah? I am shocked and laughing at the same time.

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Wuminity(f): 2:21pm On Mar 14, 2022
nurez305:
The first red flag was when she started ignoring my calls.

I went to her house to know what is going on and I met a guy there but he excuse us immediately, later she went to take her bath and drop the phone on the sofa. I was with her phone when the text message from that guy that left enter with only "OK" . then I open the message and I saw the previous conversation between them.

The guy said : when you know your boy-friend is coming to your house today, why did you invite me also to come

My fucking GF replied : he is not my boyfriend, he is only a friend


After reading that, I started sweating inside their house after I have spent on the idiot.

I bought her the phone,
Pay her school fee,
Give her money whenever she ask
When her father died, I paid her trip to and fro and also give her change to hold to her village.


I felt like a loser and was very heartbroken. I summon courage and told her to return back my phone after telling her what I saw in her inbox, she accuse me of checking her messages without her consent and she refuse to give me the phone.

I threten her that if she refuse to return my phone that I won't take it lively with her. She reported me to police and they set a trap for me, she told me to come to somewhere to collect the phone, on getting there, I was arrested and the police force me to write a statement that I will never disturb her because of this phone again. I did and they told me to call one of my relatives to come and bail me and be my witness. I did that and I was granted bail and told us to come the next day.

The next day, the police woman try to settle the issue between us and she said we should not fight each other again and continue our relationship. And the police officer told her to delete all the threat messages I sent to her which he did.


NOW IS MY TURN TO REVENGE
After about 2months that will depart, she taught I have forgotten everything she does to me not knowing that I'm only waiting for the best time to strike her back. I went to area command to hire police, the man charged me 30k and told me not to worried that what she does was very bad. I lead the way to her house and she was shocked to see me again, she quickly call her mum and to tell her, we arrested her in her shop then and the police put an allegation on her that she hire tug to beat me up because I requested for my phone from her. She started crying that is a lie. The police ask for the receipt of the phone from her and she told them that I bought it for her, they collected the phone and detained her until her family show.

I later tell the police to allow her to go but I need to collect the phone. The man said it is important I do that.... After everything, I collected the phone and leave them in the station.


Foolish olosho




I just can't stop laughing. grin grin grin

1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Nobody: 2:23pm On Mar 14, 2022
CorGier:


Manipulating and guilt-triping a SO is fair and proper in a normal, healthy heterosexual relationship. Girls your type are your own worst enemies - being too smart for your own good. The tendency to overthink and overanalyze every damn thing.
I mustn't be a narcissist to feel uneasy if some smart-arse chick thinks she has me all figured out. Maybe it's just a question of a bruised ego. The "silent treatment" as a powerful control tool? Maybe the poor guy is just sulking or simply steering clear of a toxic person?

At the emboldened, it really takes one to know one darl. You really need to look in the mirror.







K.

4 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Nobody: 2:30pm On Mar 14, 2022
Kobojunkiee:
1. Please explain what you mean by the statement in bold abeg. Manipulation in a healthy relationship? The professionals and experts out there are all screaming "HELL TO THE NO" -\

2. A bruised ego or low self-esteem? undecided

3. You have a point but even those of us who use the silent treatment in that way know it isn't necessarily the best way to handle such situations though. undecided

4. Just because I am able to spot bullsheet from afar does not mean I am swimming in it. undecided
For someone who agreed he is a control freak ,I suggest you be very careful with this one, na dem be this,you gerrit?. lipsrsealed

2 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Exkandayee(m): 2:32pm On Mar 14, 2022
Ishilove:

He/she is obviously using his forefathers to catch cruise
Idiot,now you see that she's already banging,but you no reason with me, you just deh banter words with me, when elders are talking you melow down and listen to us, I've seen things bitch

2 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by FireUpNow(m): 2:32pm On Mar 14, 2022
A girl asking do you have a bank account and how much is in it? I japka one time

1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Nobody: 2:36pm On Mar 14, 2022
Kobojunkiee:
1. Please explain what you mean by the statement in bold abeg. Manipulation in a healthy relationship? The professionals and experts out there are all screaming "HELL TO THE NO" -\

In every healthy heterosexual relationship, the ability of the man to manipulate and dare i say mess with his woman's emotions is very key. This might come off a tad chauvinistic, but every tumultuous relationship stems from the unhappiness of the male folk. For a woman to be truly happy in her relationship, it invariably means her man is happy too. It's the reason why most men would feel a woman doesn't love them anymore if she somehow develops a tough skin and stops crying or shedding tears over him.

On her part, she's not oblivious to his manipulations, in fact for a high-value male she allows it. It's innate in their nature to please men. Then ofcourse one good turn deserves another. She owns the vagína, after all.

8 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by BobbieZion(m): 2:36pm On Mar 14, 2022
Gaslighting, entitlement mentally (Credit, money, anything).
Lovebombing, nagging,temper. Kai I no fit count.

Shorey was a full blown sociopath...
I nearly ran mad within a couple of months. Thought I was going crazy
Thank God I am highly observant and sharp.
She could not beat it,I let her know and told her to her face.
She blocked me and ran off the face of the planet.... In shame.
Never!! Date a Narcissist

5 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Kobojunkiee: 2:38pm On Mar 14, 2022
CorGier:
In every healthy heterosexual relationship, the ability of the man to manipulate and dare i say mess with his woman's emotions is very key. This might come off a tad chauvinistic, but every tumultuous relationship stems from the unhappiness of the male folk. For a woman to be truly happy in her relationship, it invariably means her man is happy too.

On her part, she's not oblivious to his manipulations, in fact for a high-value male she allows it. It's innate their their nature to please men. Then ofcourse one good turn deserves another. She owns the vagína, after all.
What? undecided

So your viewpoint is that a healthy heterosexual relationship revolves around the man's ego - all this because he has an outtie while she has an innie? undecided

2 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Lizzydonnah(f): 2:38pm On Mar 14, 2022
Kobojunkiee:
ROFLMAO
grin cheesy grin grin cheesy grin cheesy





Yes o, Nairaland men scare me. It seems as if they can't think for themselves. It is very hard to differentiate between the good and the bad ones.
Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Dizzyyish: 2:43pm On Mar 14, 2022
JONNYSPUTE:
... Thought you said you re in your middle theen? Smh. Your brother was right after all.
When a woman makes any kind of remark to the effect that you are stingy, remember that this is a way of declaring her expertise at spending someone else's money (probably yours).
- Lawrence Shannon

6 Likes 3 Shares

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by bluefilm: 2:43pm On Mar 14, 2022
Lalami3232:
Dem plenty ooooo grin.
Immediately you tell a 9ja babe say get feelings for her, E be like say you dey owe her instantly.
Funny enough, 99.2% no get anything to offer aside that toto wey everybody don chop before you. Even the toto wey majority of dem dey offer isn't even tight.
Na we go still use our own money to buy enlargement pump and cream before we fit enjoy the wide canal wey many of dem dey carry. I doubt if this generation of girls go stay labour room pass 2mins sef. The pikin go swim out with ease grin


I don talk am before and I go talk am again, "a single mother for Europe tight pass our average 9ja babe"

Is that really you in that photo?

I can now see why you sound so frustrated.

1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Bestcreamreview: 2:47pm On Mar 14, 2022
Kirkman:

You don't say? Which kind nonsense vex be that one nah? I am shocked and laughing at the same time.
I was so shocked, like how can someone be so unreasonable? Or maybe he assumed I was lying about having exams to avoid seeing him which is also stupid

2 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by bluefilm: 2:48pm On Mar 14, 2022
nurez305:
The first red flag was when she started ignoring my calls.

I went to her house to know what is going on and I met a guy there but he excuse us immediately, later she went to take her bath and drop the phone on the sofa. I was with her phone when the text message from that guy that left enter with only "OK" . then I open the message and I saw the previous conversation between them.

The guy said : when you know your boy-friend is coming to your house today, why did you invite me also to come

My fucking GF replied : he is not my boyfriend, he is only a friend


After reading that, I started sweating inside their house after I have spent on the idiot.

I bought her the phone,
Pay her school fee,
Give her money whenever she ask
When her father died, I paid her trip to and fro and also give her change to hold to her village.


I felt like a loser and was very heartbroken. I summon courage and told her to return back my phone after telling her what I saw in her inbox, she accuse me of checking her messages without her consent and she refuse to give me the phone.

I threten her that if she refuse to return my phone that I won't take it lively with her. She reported me to police and they set a trap for me, she told me to come to somewhere to collect the phone, on getting there, I was arrested and the police force me to write a statement that I will never disturb her because of this phone again. I did and they told me to call one of my relatives to come and bail me and be my witness. I did that and I was granted bail and told us to come the next day.

The next day, the police woman try to settle the issue between us and she said we should not fight each other again and continue our relationship. And the police officer told her to delete all the threat messages I sent to her which he did.


NOW IS MY TURN TO REVENGE
After about 2months that will depart, she taught I have forgotten everything she does to me not knowing that I'm only waiting for the best time to strike her back. I went to area command to hire police, the man charged me 30k and told me not to worried that what she does was very bad. I lead the way to her house and she was shocked to see me again, she quickly call her mum and to tell her, we arrested her in her shop then and the police put an allegation on her that she hire tug to beat me up because I requested for my phone from her. She started crying that is a lie. The police ask for the receipt of the phone from her and she told them that I bought it for her, they collected the phone and detained her until her family show.

I later tell the police to allow her to go but I need to collect the phone. The man said it is important I do that.... After everything, I collected the phone and leave them in the station.


Foolish olosho



Hmmm... I can't believe you went to all that extent to collect just an ordinary phone.

Your heart must be so dark.

I fear for anybody wey get business with you.

Tufiakwa

2 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by missCAPS: 2:50pm On Mar 14, 2022
Pride
Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by bluefilm: 2:50pm On Mar 14, 2022
Offpoint1:
She doesn't know who Einstein or Isaac Newton was, couldn't held any intelligent conversation.

Meanwhile...

Your own English is quite appalling.

Tufiakwa.

1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Infamous(m): 2:50pm On Mar 14, 2022
I told her I saw the act of pressing her phone while on a date with her as a disrespect. She stopped for a while and then went back to it. That was when I knew the relationship won’t last.

11 Likes 3 Shares

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by nurez305(m): 2:53pm On Mar 14, 2022
bluefilm:


Hmmm... I can't believe you went to all that extent to collect just an ordinary phone.

Your heart must be so dark.

I fear for anybody wey get business with you.

Tufiakwa
That's just the summary of the whole things.... If I start explaining everything she did to me and what I did back to her, then you won't even have the strength to read it.

If she can set me up to arrest me because I demanded for my phone to be returned back, then spending millions to retaliate to clear the heart break is not much.

Some useless people will only take you for a fool in this country if you are too full and quiet. If I wanted to really wicked her, the police will never allow her to go base on the allegation they put on her.

I only do that to let her know that she is not smart with what she does to me

10 Likes

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by bluefilm: 2:57pm On Mar 14, 2022
KingDamzzy:
She had the picture of the flag of Japan as her phone screenlock.

No bigger red flag than that.

Kai... Crase people plenty o for this nairaland.

I wonder what you would have done then if her screen lock was the Chinese flag?

1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by bluefilm: 3:00pm On Mar 14, 2022
nurez305:
That's just the summary of the whole things.... If I start explaining everything she did to me and what I did back to her, then you won't even have the strength to read it.

If she can set me up to arrest me because I demanded for my phone to be returned back, then spending millions to retaliate to clear the heart break is not much.

Some useless people will only take you for a fool in this country if you are too full and quiet. If I wanted to really wicked her, the police will never allow her to go base on the allegation they put on her.

I only do that to let her know that she is not smart with what she does to me

Nwoke m, you went too far over a small nonsense like an ordinary phone.

It shows that you are too vindictive.

If i were you, and i discover what she did, i will simply ghost her.

And that's the end of the relationship.
Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Blessiing(f): 3:01pm On Mar 14, 2022
Baba started asking me to borrow him money and to collect loan from people for him the very next day i agreed to date him.... Since i have known him he has never eaten or had money, you will always hear him say"since yesterday i never chop, one naira no dey my hand like this"kai Akin my God will judge you heavily..... Nobody tell me before i off slippers run grin grin

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Offpoint1: 3:15pm On Mar 14, 2022
We4all:


Are you sure or you are trying to save face?
Save face for what? No one is an Island of knowledge, I can't possible know everything and I don't expect anyone to do so.
There are little common stuffs you need to know.
Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by nkemchineke: 3:16pm On Mar 14, 2022
Guyyyyyyyyyyyy You are a HERO. Never allow a looser outsmart u. Guys be WARNED.
nurez305:
The first red flag was when she started ignoring my calls.

I went to her house to know what is going on and I met a guy there but he excuse us immediately, later she went to take her bath and drop the phone on the sofa. I was with her phone when the text message from that guy that left enter with only "OK" . then I open the message and I saw the previous conversation between them.

The guy said : when you know your boy-friend is coming to your house today, why did you invite me also to come

My fucking GF replied : he is not my boyfriend, he is only a friend


After reading that, I started sweating inside their house after I have spent on the idiot.

I bought her the phone,
Pay her school fee,
Give her money whenever she ask
When her father died, I paid her trip to and fro and also give her change to hold to her village.


I felt like a loser and was very heartbroken. I summon courage and told her to return back my phone after telling her what I saw in her inbox, she accuse me of checking her messages without her consent and she refuse to give me the phone.

I threten her that if she refuse to return my phone that I won't take it lively with her. She reported me to police and they set a trap for me, she told me to come to somewhere to collect the phone, on getting there, I was arrested and the police force me to write a statement that I will never disturb her because of this phone again. I did and they told me to call one of my relatives to come and bail me and be my witness. I did that and I was granted bail and told us to come the next day.

The next day, the police woman try to settle the issue between us and she said we should not fight each other again and continue our relationship. And the police officer told her to delete all the threat messages I sent to her which he did.


NOW IS MY TURN TO REVENGE
After about 2months that will depart, she taught I have forgotten everything she does to me not knowing that I'm only waiting for the best time to strike her back. I went to area command to hire police, the man charged me 30k and told me not to worried that what she does was very bad. I lead the way to her house and she was shocked to see me again, she quickly call her mum and to tell her, we arrested her in her shop then and the police put an allegation on her that she hire tug to beat me up because I requested for my phone from her. She started crying that is a lie. The police ask for the receipt of the phone from her and she told them that I bought it for her, they collected the phone and detained her until her family show.

I later tell the police to allow her to go but I need to collect the phone. The man said it is important I do that.... After everything, I collected the phone and leave them in the station.


Foolish olosho


1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by lasisi69(f): 3:18pm On Mar 14, 2022
Offpoint1:
She doesn't know who Einstein or Isaac Newton was, couldn't held any intelligent conversation.
what attracted you to her in the first place ?? undecided

1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by Offpoint1: 3:20pm On Mar 14, 2022
lasisi69:
what attracted you to her in the first place ?? undecided
My testosterones was on high grin
Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by lasisi69(f): 3:21pm On Mar 14, 2022
fantastic1:
She rather quarrel than have a sensible discussion. Never had time for me while I was sick but was fighting the chick who took care of me even though we weren’t dating.
fantasy undecided

1 Like

Re: What's The Biggest Red Flag You Ever Spotted At The Start Of A New Relationship? by lasisi69(f): 3:22pm On Mar 14, 2022
Offpoint1:

My testosterones was on high grin
I knew because, aside that, Wrong move !!!

1 Like

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