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In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most - Romance (3) - Nairaland

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How Marriage Benefits Women More Than Men – Lady Explains / Igbo Women: The Smartest Black Women And World Most Beautiful / Any Lady That Belongs To Any Of These Groups Should Consider Polygamy (opinion) (2) (3) (4)

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Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by pansophist(m): 5:56pm On Aug 08, 2023
complexstuffs:
1.b is not completely true. There is a huge difference between a concubine and a wife because 2nd, 3rd and 4th wives are all legal wives while the concubines are adultery.

And that's the point I was making, regardless of which side of the fence you're standing on.

That was why I said the concubines as you called it, are the loosers. They satisfy his sexual needs, and may even get pregnant for him, without the rights wives enjoys.

3 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Brandiebird(f): 6:00pm On Aug 08, 2023
Any man with the financial and physical strength to undertake this task should go ahead but if you want to distribute limp dick and poverty then god punish you!

4 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by pansophist(m): 6:01pm On Aug 08, 2023
meobizy:
We are theoretically two hundred and sixteen million humans in a country fit for quadruple times less than the figure. If polygamy becomes legal (which it sure is in the present Nigerian law), na continued poverty get our great grandchildren. Why can’t we set a good example by pushing short term pleasure aside? Life is not all about sex.

Children are not gifts from God. Humans need resources to survive, which our country has not learned to harness nor produce. Una wey dey type in support no get forms of employment to begin with.

You are right. I only hope that you know the difference between a discourse and action.

The post is merely to light up discussions about angles people don't think when they discuss about polygamy. It's not an advice, or a command, that you should marry many wives.

Polygamy also have its down sides, since it will create a society with lots of angry men who can't find a wife, because all the women went for the few wealthy men

Isn't it already happening? Lots of women are dating the same guy, they just don't know. Polygamy can be consensual, or forced. It's doesn't matter, it's still polygamy.

Forced polygamy is when you meet a guy online, then started dating him in a month time, without knowing he has a wife, or other women like you. He is basically rotating lots of women sexually.

Whilst to these women, they believed he is their only guy. Many many relationships are like this. That's polygamy. So whether it is legislated or not, it will flourish. That's human mating game in a nutshell.

7 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by pansophist(m): 6:04pm On Aug 08, 2023
Brandiebird:
Any man with the financial and physical strength to undertake this task should go ahead but if you want to distribute limp dick and poverty then god punish you!

Amen cool

2 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Exceed15: 6:07pm On Aug 08, 2023
The disadvantage is more. A polygamous home is always at war.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by GloriousGbola: 6:10pm On Aug 08, 2023
pansophist:
. When people think about polygamy, they imagine a young man getting married to two young women. They see it from the prism of his sexual vanity, and criticize why he is not content with one woman. But in reality, polygamy is a well-established method of human family formation and is present in every single society whether it is legislated or not. 

This class of women benefits from polygamy

1. Barren women. Most men will not marry a woman who can't bear a child for him. The alternative for such women is polygamy since the other wives can give him a child.

 2. Divorcees with children. Most men will always prefer a woman who has never been married before, but being divorced should not deny a woman marriage, and lots of men will not mind marrying such women as second wives and being step-fathers to their children. 

3. Widowers (especially with children): This is self-explanatory. 

4. Levirate wives; This is related to number three, but differs in the angle that a man marries his late brother's wife, taking care of her and the children. Giving them a home and protection.

1a. Now, bear in mind that there are more women than men. Men are responsible for most work death, and war death, most prisoners are men and men have to be established before getting a wife. A woman generally is ready to marry in her 20s. So with this reality, women will always be available in high numbers than eligible males. 

1b. Also, bear in mind that the West seeing polygamy as outdated is actually de facto polygamy. There is no difference between marrying one woman and sleeping with four outside. It is still polygamy. The women whom he didn't marry are the losers in the game since they will not enjoy any conjugal protection from him and the law. 

1c. Again, you should bear in mind that monogamy is successful in the West due to its wealth. The social system can take care of single mothers by giving them cash monthly. In other parts of the world, suffering awaits such women, in this case, polygamy transfers the responsibility to the man. 

1d. Also, polygamy is actually a burden on the polygamous man, because he now has more mouths to feed, and children and wives to take care of. His pocket has to be heavy. 

1e. Polygamy gives women the opportunity to team up and share a high-value man since these men are few in number. In dating, women share the same men, why not in marriage?

Most importantly, if polygamy is done rightly, it is equally as good as monogamy.

A high value man and his brood. So is this polygamy done right?

Will the most ardent advocates of polygamy 'the high value men' seek out divorcees or barren women, or will they seek out younger women?

Polygamy especially in the poor countries you are referencing is not about marrying women who missed out for any reason. Like the west and trophy wives it is about getting access to younger more nubile women.

Also and more importantly there is a number of children you have at which point you are nothing more than a sperm donor. A classmate who was advocating polygamy when I asked who will raise this army of children said - it's the woman's job. And that on its own is another reason why polygamous homes can produce train wreck adults. No supervision from dad, and an atmosphere of competition means each wife will hide rather than tackle her children's issues. As any wife with a misbehaving child will likely be mocked by the others

4 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by pansophist(m): 6:14pm On Aug 08, 2023
GloriousGbola:


A high value man and his brood. So is this polygamy done right?

Will the most ardent advocates of polygamy 'the high value men' seek out divorcees or barren women, or will they seek out younger women?

Polygamy especially in the poor countries you are referencing is not about marrying women who missed out for any reason. Like the west and trophy wives it is about getting access to younger more nubile women.

True.

Me just decide to point the angle people don't look at it from. Levirate marriage is common in some part of Nigeria. Women with kids also get married.

Barren women are often the first wife, then the man take another one that will bear him children. Widow also do get married, especially if she has no child.
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by babestell(f): 6:26pm On Aug 08, 2023
Well written article.

My personal experience is that most children from polygamous homes actively seek not to recreate such in their own homes. They tend to be the ones most likely to end up as baby mamas or dyfunctional husbands

Also my experience is that Polygamy doesnt reduce promiscuity in men but it increase promiscuity in women especially from wives who do not feel satisfied.

To each their own. My own is that of you want to be polygamous be upfront about it and marry a woman who agrees to it. its dishonest when one partner gets up in the middle of the day and decides they want to be polygamous after commiting to a monogamous relatonshiip.

4 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Emilokan1(m): 6:31pm On Aug 08, 2023
Rokiat:
1d. Also, polygamy is actually a burden on the polygamous man, because he now has more mouths to feed, and children and wives to take care of. His pocket has to be heavy.



Are these men been forced into it? undecided many of you men are polygamous by nature and ain’t satisfied with one pussy. Whatever burden it comes with ya all deserve it and even more hardship.
is it your hardship? undecided

1 Like

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Amarisco(f): 6:41pm On Aug 08, 2023
zed7:

World population actually says men are 50.4% and women are about 49.6%. Statistically, there are more men than women.

In terms of marriage and dating, eligible men are a small fraction compared to women. That's why many old women are unmarried. Like the topic says, polygamy was designed to cater for these women. One wealthy man can take 10 women off the 'streets'. That's exactly what Solomon did in the bible.

Now that polygamy is frowned upon, the number of* old, frustrated and unmarried women has tripled far more than our grandparents generation. It's even going to get worse in a few years. Hook up, feminism and lesbianism is eventually going to be the female species undoing.

I specifically wrote we are roughly even with a less than 1% difference. I then suggested that perhaps the calibre of eligible men/women are what increases the disparity. You’re just mansplaining and repackaging what I literally just said 🫤.

The thorough emasculation of men* is going to be the female species undoing.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Amarisco(f): 6:45pm On Aug 08, 2023
pansophist:


If falseprophet1, a whole man of god correct correct you and you refuse, who I'm I?

Aunty if you even tell me now say 1 + 1 = 5, I'll nod my head like a lizard and say you're right.

cool

😂😂😂😂 you can’t be serious. Correct what? Oh please.

Separate the issues, dont merge them - that’s all I’m saying.
Population distribution cannot be the reason for an imbalance in marital eligibility/opportunity. The statistical significance is way too low dalin & that’s the same point I’m highlighting to our beloved falseprophet1 of god

4 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Negroid001(m): 6:46pm On Aug 08, 2023
Amarisco:


I specifically wrote we are roughly even with a less than 1% difference. I then suggested that perhaps the calibre of eligible men/women are what increases the disparity. You’re just mansplaining and repackaging what I literally just said 🫤.

The thorough emasculation of men* is going to be the female species undoing.

How accurate is the source of this your research?
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by ChiefOkporghe: 6:47pm On Aug 08, 2023
pansophist:
. When people think about polygamy, they imagine a young man getting married to two young women. They see it from the prism of his sexual vanity, and criticize why he is not content with one woman. But in reality, polygamy is a well-established method of human family formation and is present in every single society whether it is legislated or not. 

This class of women benefits from polygamy

1. Barren women. Most men will not marry a woman who can't bear a child for him. The alternative for such women is polygamy since the other wives can give him a child.

 2. Divorcees with children. Most men will always prefer a woman who has never been married before, but being divorced should not deny a woman marriage, and lots of men will not mind marrying such women as second wives and being step-fathers to their children. 

3. Widowers (especially with children): This is self-explanatory. 

4. Levirate wives; This is related to number three, but differs in the angle that a man marries his late brother's wife, taking care of her and the children. Giving them a home and protection.

1a. Now, bear in mind that there are more women than men. Men are responsible for most work death, and war death, most prisoners are men and men have to be established before getting a wife. A woman generally is ready to marry in her 20s. So with this reality, women will always be available in high numbers than eligible males. 

1b. Also, bear in mind that the West seeing polygamy as outdated is actually de facto polygamy. There is no difference between marrying one woman and sleeping with four outside. It is still polygamy. The women whom he didn't marry are the losers in the game since they will not enjoy any conjugal protection from him and the law. 

1c. Again, you should bear in mind that monogamy is successful in the West due to its wealth. The social system can take care of single mothers by giving them cash monthly. In other parts of the world, suffering awaits such women, in this case, polygamy transfers the responsibility to the man. 

1d. Also, polygamy is actually a burden on the polygamous man, because he now has more mouths to feed, and children and wives to take care of. His pocket has to be heavy. 

1e. Polygamy gives women the opportunity to team up and share a high-value man since these men are few in number. In dating, women share the same men, why not in marriage?

Most importantly, if polygamy is done rightly, it is equally as good as monogamy.
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Atk1nson(m): 6:59pm On Aug 08, 2023
pansophist:
.
4. Levirate wives; This is related to number three, but differs in the angle that a man marries his late brother's wife, taking care of her and the children. Giving them a home and protection.


A man that can lay with his brother's wife when he is late can also lay with her when he is alive.

Also, if you cannot take care of your late brother's wife and children with obtaining sexual favour from the wife in the name of marriage, something is wrong somewhere.

This is crazy on many levels

3 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by pansophist(m): 7:10pm On Aug 08, 2023
Atk1nson:


A man that can lay with his brother's wife when he is late can also lay with her when he is alive.

Also, if you cannot take care of your late brother's wife and children with obtaining sexual favour from the wife in the name of marriage, something is wrong somewhere.

This is crazy on many levels

I agree. Some cultures are babaric when judged through the lense of other cultures. Levirate marriage is actually practiced in Nigeria.

When white people think of polygamy, it's so disgusting to them, but when we also think of a man forking a man, it's equally disgusting to us.

3 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Atk1nson(m): 7:20pm On Aug 08, 2023
pansophist:


I agree. Some cultures are babaric when judged through the lense of other cultures. Levirate marriage is actually practiced in Nigeria.

When white people think of polygamy, it's so disgusting to them, but when we also think of a man forking a man, it's equally disgusting to us.

True
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by pansophist(m): 7:22pm On Aug 08, 2023
Atk1nson:


True

To me, both are equally disgusting.

The post is not supporting, commanding, instruction or telling men to be polygamist.

It's just to clarify an angle that is usually not talked about. Polygamy can be good also.

2 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Khastro(m): 7:33pm On Aug 08, 2023
pansophist:
.
1a. Now, bear in mind that there are more women than men. Men are responsible for most work death, and war death, most prisoners are men.... women will always be available in high numbers than eligible males. 
.

Women more than men?
What is your statistics?
The real margin of difference by research is not enough for your manner of writing.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by nextstep(m): 7:41pm On Aug 08, 2023
Amarisco:
1a… na. this is an urban myth. We are roughly evenly distributed
Amarisco:
I specifically wrote we are roughly even with a less than 1% difference. I then suggested that perhaps the calibre of eligible men/women are what increases the disparity. You’re just mansplaining and repackaging what I literally just said 🫤.

I think the world "calibre" is close, but perhaps "eligible" would be a less-loaded/biased word, in the sense that, while a woman is eligible for marriage by (e.g.) 21, a man in her age-group won't be until (e.g.) 26.

I think the disparity comes down to two factors:

1. In any age group you'll typically have younger women pairing with older men (can be a difference of 4-10 years). GIrls mature faster than boys because babies need to be borne earlier, and men later because they need to acquire resources to cater for their family. We see this play out in most dating choices.

2. the age pyramid (fewer number of older people at the top, and larger numbers of younger people at the bottom - see picture), practically guarantees there is a smaller pool of men for women to choose from, in pretty much any age-bracket after 20, especially if women choose up in age and status.

Then add the elegant treatment on the attrition of men due to early deaths or removal from the pool, and I'm fully convinced that there are always more women chasing fewer men, hence why polyandry is inevitable. It also means that generally, most men before 26 are "invisible" to women as far as marriage is concerned.

pansophist:



No, we are not roughly evenly distributed. It is not true and has never been true.

Ok, I will put it this way. The realities of men make an unequal availability of marriageable men compared to women. Depending on the society, a woman is pretty much available to marry at 18 years old.

It is not the same for men. For example, lots of Ukrainian widows have emerged whose husbands had died in the war, over 300k Ukrainian men died just within the last 17 months of this ongoing war.

And that's just war. Prisons, work death, low-value men, etc are all in the mix of the few available men, so how will all these women get married? In the West, they can just adopt and depend on social benefits, but the west is less than 15% of the global population.

So no, societal stability is burdened on men, and in many cases, men's lives are sacrificed for it. So there will always be a surplus of more women than men who wants to marry.

It is from this angle that Islam for example permitted polygamy, not for evanescent reasons.

1 Like

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by ladej(m): 8:00pm On Aug 08, 2023
pansophist:
. When people think about polygamy, they imagine a young man getting married to two young women. They see it from the prism of his sexual vanity, and criticize why he is not content with one woman. But in reality, polygamy is a well-established method of human family formation and is present in every single society whether it is legislated or not. 

This class of women benefits from polygamy

1. Barren women. Most men will not marry a woman who can't bear a child for him. The alternative for such women is polygamy since the other wives can give him a child.

 2. Divorcees with children. Most men will always prefer a woman who has never been married before, but being divorced should not deny a woman marriage, and lots of men will not mind marrying such women as second wives and being step-fathers to their children. 

3. Widowers (especially with children): This is self-explanatory. 

4. Levirate wives; This is related to number three, but differs in the angle that a man marries his late brother's wife, taking care of her and the children. Giving them a home and protection.

1a. Now, bear in mind that there are more women than men. Men are responsible for most work death, and war death, most prisoners are men and men have to be established before getting a wife. A woman generally is ready to marry in her 20s. So with this reality, women will always be available in high numbers than eligible males. 

1b. Also, bear in mind that the West seeing polygamy as outdated is actually de facto polygamy. There is no difference between marrying one woman and sleeping with four outside. It is still polygamy. The women whom he didn't marry are the losers in the game since they will not enjoy any conjugal protection from him and the law. 

1c. Again, you should bear in mind that monogamy is successful in the West due to its wealth. The social system can take care of single mothers by giving them cash monthly. In other parts of the world, suffering awaits such women, in this case, polygamy transfers the responsibility to the man. 

1d. Also, polygamy is actually a burden on the polygamous man, because he now has more mouths to feed, and children and wives to take care of. His pocket has to be heavy. 

1e. Polygamy gives women the opportunity to team up and share a high-value man since these men are few in number. In dating, women share the same men, why not in marriage?

Most importantly, if polygamy is done rightly, it is equally as good as monogamy.
BRILLIANT PIECE. WELL WRITTEN

1 Like

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Sweetvie: 8:12pm On Aug 08, 2023
jeff1607:


In monogamy, a normal or average thinking wife is always jealous of an imaginary woman out there.
I agree. Now having 2or more women in the same house. You can imagine how competitive it's gonna be. No peace

1 Like

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by etrange: 8:23pm On Aug 08, 2023
This is kinda funny though. If it benefits women the most, why is it then a man arguing in favor of it? If the people it benefits the most are telling they don't want the benefits, why are you sweating it? Let them miss the benefits nah. It's a burden on the polygamous men yet they're the ones yearning for it the most. Lol.

5 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Edmaths: 8:24pm On Aug 08, 2023
phemmyfour:


Let people be. Polygamy breathe hatred and disunity more when compared to monogamy

Ha. jia Mee.na with H said more than this while she was still doing Romeo and Juliet with her 1st husband.

When the reality came to her, she said it openly on TV that she's now a 2nd wife.

What of Fol.uke Dara.mola and co? Their medula oblongata have been reset by the law of nature.

The OP is 100% correct.
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Basiljoe: 8:32pm On Aug 08, 2023
tommy589:
Trust dies much faster in polygamy
False.
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Basiljoe: 8:39pm On Aug 08, 2023
1Sharon:
Have you guys actually spoken to any children from polygamous homes to know how toxic it is?
I agree with you on this, it's one of the many disadvantages of polygamy.

2 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Basiljoe: 8:40pm On Aug 08, 2023
Savedday2:
Getting married to a 9ja girl is the greatest mistake you can ever make in a lifetime not to talk of marrying more than one 9ja girl that means, even in the grave there won't be peace.


Anytime I see a guy marrying them, I always pity him.

Unfortunately, i agree with you. cry
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Basiljoe: 8:41pm On Aug 08, 2023
FalseProphet1:

So how come hundreds of ladies are always disturbing me in my spiritual center and other spiritual centers and churches for prayers concerning a husband.

Whether you choose to believe it or not, the ratio of eligible men to available women is very low. Because there are millions of men in their 30s who don't have jobs, so they're not even thinking about marriage. Whereas their female counterparts are there waiting for husbands.

This means that for every 10 available women, there's only one eligible man. So they'll have to fight for him, and even if he married one out of the 10, he'll still be able to continue having affairs with the remaining 9, because there's a serious shortage of eligible men to marry them.

That's the reality on ground.

This I have seen.
True words.
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Basiljoe: 8:47pm On Aug 08, 2023
zed7:

World population actually says men are 50.4% and women are about 49.6%. Statistically, there are more men than women.

In terms of marriage and dating, eligible men are a small fraction compared to women. That's why many old women are unmarried. Like the topic says, polygamy was designed to cater for these women. One wealthy man can take 10 women off the 'streets'. That's exactly what Solomon did in the bible.

Now that polygamy is frowned upon, the number if old, frustrated and unmarried women has tripled far more than our grandparents generation. It's even going to get worse in a few years. Hook up, feminism and lesbianism is eventually going to be the female species undoing.
@bolded, you definitely don't understand women's mating strategy if you think hookup culture, lesbianism and feminism are new things that has not previously existed, or going to be extinct regardless of if there are eligible men or not.

"Open Hypergamy becomes open prostitution, but this relationship becomes an accepted exchange or transaction the more comfortable women get with revealing the crueler nature of their sexual strategy." - Rational Male
Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by mariahAngel(f): 8:54pm On Aug 08, 2023
meobizy:
We are theoretically two hundred and sixteen million humans in a country fit for quadruple times less than the figure. If polygamy becomes legal (which it sure is in the present Nigerian law), na continued poverty get our great grandchildren. Why can’t we set a good example by pushing short term pleasure aside? Life is not all about sex. Children are not gifts from God. Humans need resources to survive, which our country has not learned to harness nor produce. Una wey dey type in support no get forms of employment to begin with.

Sometimes, you go make some sense, other times, you go be like person wey dey talk to himself for main road. undecided

3 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by NOwazobia: 8:54pm On Aug 08, 2023
Polygamy is brostitution wrap in marital rites. undecided

2 Likes

Re: In Defense Of Polygamy, And How It Benefits Women The Most by Basiljoe: 8:56pm On Aug 08, 2023
pansophist:


I agree. Some cultures are babaric when judged through the lense of other cultures. Levirate marriage is actually practiced in Nigeria.

When white people think of polygamy, it's so disgusting to them, but when we also think of a man forking a man, it's equally disgusting to us.
This is false, polygamy is uncommon in the west today because of the highly gynocentric nature of the western society. Most men lost their power and frame after the advent of the birth control pill in the 60's which shifted the power of sex to the feminine , i don't have much time to go into explaining this, but you're wrong. Many western men do want polygamy but can't get it due to the highly evolved gynocentric nature of their society, and most have been brainwashed to think about it as wrong.

1 Like

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