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New Marriage About To Crash. - Romance (8) - Nairaland

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House Maid Is About To Crash My Sister's Marriage / My Wife's Sister Is About To Crash My Marriage / How To Crash Your Relationship 101 (2) (3) (4)

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Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Wodu89: 4:53pm On Aug 09, 2023
merits:



A childish behavior keeping malice with your wife so disgusting.But give him sometime and space his brain will reset to factory settings,I did same too but as times goes on everything stablise and the marriage going well till date.


Im surprised people are not mentioning the malice, sulking and the childish behavior he's using to start off. Only focusing on 150k. The husband isn't mature for marriage


How can one start the journey of marriage with such thick malice over such trivial matter. What if one now offends him, will this one be capable of forgiving anyone. What a nonsense. Nigeria raises very pathetic men. See his kinds supporting him all over the place turning side eyes to all his childish antics. I see no sign of maturity at all in the description of his behaviors. Let's hope the op didn't lie on the man but if the description is the husband's real attitude it's not apology he needs, he needs to be sent back to couples counseling sessions.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by correctguy101(m): 5:00pm On Aug 09, 2023
Nemesis0147:
Madam,,you asked him to pay the bills your father gave him if he really loved you and he did that by taking up loans….allow the man have peace na…he is thinking of how to pay back the loans he took just to prove his love for you.

You and your family wicked sha and your husband has a lot of guts for taking up loans just to wed you….Odiegwu.
He for leave you for your father make he marry you na.

It has already happened na, no too blame the guy.
You know, some people orientation is just different....

Na old rebels like us the guy lack. I for dash am better advice. What man takes a loan to do party? Only a madman if you ask me.

If you must be in debt, make it worthwhile...

Some mumu go say the man na crybaby but if you know the headache igbese can cause, you go borrow leg run..

But, I too enjoy the advice nairalanders dey give our madam.

I wish dem well..

My own anger is I wasn't there to chop and enjoy party meat and booze....


Smh

1 Like

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by RIDOO: 5:01pm On Aug 09, 2023
Gr8mind07:
Knowing the financial strength of your husband, you could have mediated to get the burden on him reduced. He expected that but to his disappointment he didn't get it from you.

You & your family should have remembered that there is life after the marriage ceremony. However, I will suggest you try to appeal to him.and see how you can join hands in offsetting the loans incurred.

A supportive wife is always the delight of every man

You just nailed it.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Wodu89: 5:02pm On Aug 09, 2023
Nairas2dollars:


Your husband is the fool, no sane man can do what he did. When I was in medicine school, in my 500l, I had this real girl I have been dating, they are from Anambra state. I wanted to marry her because suitors were flocking around her. I brought wine and visited ther house in fegge housing estate Onitsha. I bluntly told the parents that I am not financial capable then for expensive marriage but at that level I can feed myself and their daughter till I start practicing as a doctor. I talked to the Dad as man to man. They brought out the list aftermaths and everything sum up to 2 million naira plus the wedding and everything. I called her that I was dating then, she supported her parents saying that I must pay her bride price and church marriage ( church marriage expenses is like 3 million naira) like she wrote it in Capital letter and send to me. She was a junior lecturer then at Unizik. I asked her if she could assist in wedding expenses..she refused. We were still dating, I kept telling her that I don't have money for marriage. Later on we were just casual friends till I moved on. The important thing I want to emphasize here is that she is still single now at 29 years where as I am already a multi millionaire.. infact I worth like 120 million naira now but I can never go back to her! She chats me..we talk but I would always tell her that am broke for marriage. I don't want to be blunt with her. After my penultimate heartbreak, I have given up on love shaa..I am a flirt now and I want to live like this forever till I die. Once I wanted to marry, the finance prevented me, I can't kill myself. Don't quote me for any advice, I don't need your rubbish advices!



Forgive and forget. The mistake will make her more valueable to you. Go and take your wife, rich man grin

1 Like

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by sunsweet33: 5:03pm On Aug 09, 2023
But to be honest, starting a conversation with “if you loved me, you would do xyz” is not a nice way to discuss an issue. Even if that’s how you feel, try not to say it because it sounds like cheap manipulation.

2 Likes

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by omoadeleye(m): 5:03pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.


Why will you say that he is the one that want your hand in marriage?

Does that means that you are doing him favour for being his wife?

That's an arrant nonsense

1 Like

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Nairas2dollars: 5:12pm On Aug 09, 2023
Wodu89:




Forgive and forget. The mistake will make her more valueable to you. Go and take your wife, rich man grin

I have lost interest in emotions, am on motion without emotions.

1 Like

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by martinm45: 5:14pm On Aug 09, 2023
You should have been on the side of your husband when your father was making demands, knowing that this is person you will spend the rest of your life. Parents should understand that settlementbof marriage rights is continuous. When the parents in-law have financial need they will calling the the son inlaw. If you love him you should always be on his side. Try apologising to him, tell him that you know you let him down that he should give you another opportunity to prove your love for him and your commitment to the union.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by josilcool(m): 5:17pm On Aug 09, 2023
Your response to his plight shows that you are not mature enough... You better apologize to him and started seeing his problem as your problem too
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Innobee99(m): 5:24pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.
It wasn't ur father's fault but ur fault because u wanted a big wedding.
My wife stood up for me by cutting some expenses for me from her family side and today I didn't regret anything.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Posh2018: 5:26pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.

2 things are likely responsible.

1. He took loan and it is weighing him down. His effective salary has reduced by heavy loans and this could take time to offset and it is possible expenditure has increased. Many men will go depressed

Solution.- Try to reduce expenditure in the house to meet up with current income or strive to contribute and reduce the burden on him. Better if he sees u doing your best to make things better.

2. Is possible he has developed a mindset that you parasitic because you did not bother even when he was being pushed to the wall. So u need to change that mindset by being consistently supportive. if you can go on for a reasonable time without asking for anything or even giving him some money sometimes. the aim is to change the mindset.

Most guys will revert back when they see selflessness in their spouse.

1 Like

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by ibinaboonline: 5:32pm On Aug 09, 2023
You see this:

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

That's a mindset you need to address.

You're both the price, not just you. I don't know how old you are but I suspect less than 25 years. Don't take advantage of the value he's placed on you. There's 99.9% possibility that you carried over your "if you cherished me, you'll do this" mindset beyond the wedding preparation and into your marriage. I wonder if there isn't a part of the story that left him with no choice but to go ahead with the wedding. Personally, a character like your dad can't be my inlaw. No offense intended. You keep saying "if he wanted your hand in marriage," but what about you? Didn't you want his hand in marriage too? What about his own needs? After all that, you still want a cheerful husband "cherishing" you and just 24 hours grateful that he was lucky to marry you.
I understand the guy, but he needs to shoulder the burden and move forward. That's our plight in this life, something characters like you don't appreciate. The wedding is over and he needs to have a deep talk with you so that you both can grow together and move into a different phase in your relationship. Hopefully, none of you will be too stubborn or prideful to stoop and work on yourselves.

Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by ikelords(m): 5:32pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.
You are the most foolish woman ever to walk the face of the earth. So you made you father drain your husband financially because of an event that didn't last for 6 hrs. Did you ever think what life after wedding will look like? Did you ever consider the financial involvement it takes to start a family before your family made him go over and beyond. You just proved to your husband that you ain't a wise woman capable of holding and keeping your family and any little pressure to destabilze your new family you will surely yeild to it. I don't blame your hubby for acting up, you and your family brought this up, that man is not safe with you.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Wodu89: 5:40pm On Aug 09, 2023
Nairas2dollars:


I have lost interest in emotions, am on motion without emotions.


He may not be able to neg you but atleast we.ypur.online in-laws supposed fit beg you na.

Bi ko, we re " Obi ", come carry your wife wink
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Exceed15: 5:40pm On Aug 09, 2023
Do you see now? You are the one at the receiving end of insensitivity of your parents to this guy during the marriage rites . Obviously he was drained beyond his financial strength. Madam enjoy marriage o like that and stop disturbing us here.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by ibinaboonline: 5:42pm On Aug 09, 2023
He is your husband you should know what to do to get him come around

She probably doesn't know because she never paid much attention to his needs while they were courting. She was the prize and the only one deserving of attention.

Jazmine10:
Your Husband is right. Na wisdom dem take dey marry. The Bible even says a wise woman builds her home. If he complained, he knows his financial strength and you check am now,after wedding na marriage na garri una go drink? Or you want am to begin pay igbese? Your role then should have been to mediate between your Father and Your Husband. Las las your pops go want make you go your husband house and make im fit take care of you instead of ostentatious spending for some people wey no go give crap about una if una broke. Kneel down apologise give am well well. He is your husband you should know what to do to get him come around and one more thing it is you and him always. Even if you no understand or you oppose, trust his leadership except when you see say wetin him dey do no make sense. May GOD help us all with wisdom.
@Negroid001 your attention is needed hia ooh. Coman give your 2cents from a man's perspective.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Wodu89: 5:43pm On Aug 09, 2023
ikelords:
You are the most foolish woman ever to walk the face of the earth. So you made you father drain your husband financially because of an event that didn't last for 6 hrs. Did you ever think what life after wedding will look like? Did you ever consider the financial involvement it takes to start a family before your family made him go over and beyond. You just proved to your husband that you ain't a wise woman capable of holding and keeping your family and any little pressure to destabilze your new family you will surely yeild to it. I don't blame your hubby for acting up, you and your family brought this up, that man is not safe with you.



Shut up. Una too dey dramatic. I disagree with your stance. Wedding na preparation. He had a choice to marry someone else. Poverty post
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Lance008(m): 5:44pm On Aug 09, 2023
Loan date is near and no hope to pay
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Emma1Oj(m): 5:45pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.
U guys can imagine. From start to finish she only gave out the bolded and still has gut to say it. No shame, even watched her parents extort the young man. Very heartless and unsupportive soul. "If he love you he shld provide everything" if na me... Make I no talk.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by ibinaboonline: 5:46pm On Aug 09, 2023
Thank you o.
donbachi:
If buying a cow and renting a hall for show off is a good thing....tell your parents to mark their own marriage anniversary and do same.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by talented321: 5:52pm On Aug 09, 2023
BadMaster:

I don't know why some men are so foolish. Why should you get yourself indebted because you want to marry a woman that's not a virgin, and you weren't even the one that deflowered her? Even the wife doesn't see anything wrong with the way she handled the whole situation that led to her husband borrowing just to marry her.

Now his life is miserable.
many of them think marriage is am oil work' so they do anyhow until they got hooked into it (marriage)
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Passionate1(m): 5:58pm On Aug 09, 2023
"if he truly loves me ,he would provide them." Na scam! Emotional blackmail!

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by GoodRocks: 6:01pm On Aug 09, 2023
UnfairLife7:
was your mother married a virgin? Go home and ask her and get back to me.

Seem you mistake all mothers as your mother who didn't marry as a virgin. Dude, those days in the 50s, 60, 70 and 80s respectively, women were highly decent and highly valuable because they were all virgins. My father married my mother when she was a pure virgin.

Dude, those days virginity was the pride of a woman. Don't mistake every mother as your mother who didn't marry as a virgin.

The op isn't a virgin, why couldn't those guys that destroyed her kpekus marry her? Instead she and her poverty stricken family planned and sucked the man dried until he has nothing left. E be like say ur brain wet
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Starhearts: 6:02pm On Aug 09, 2023
U neva see anything....
Anyway naa man l blame ...
Go take loan to marry olosho nd condemned woman ..

D guy go still pursue u, marks my words...
because u have murdered peace
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by ojonugba2014(m): 6:20pm On Aug 09, 2023
Na the mumu man I blame.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by UnfairLife7(m): 6:27pm On Aug 09, 2023
GO0DHardDick:


Seem you mistake all mothers as your mother who didn't marry as a virgin. Dude, those days in the 50s, 60, 70 and 80s respectively, women were highly decent and highly valuable because they were all virgins. My father married my mother when she was a pure virgin.

Dude, those days virginity was the pride of a woman. Don't mistake every mother as your mother who didn't marry as a virgin.

The op isn't a virgin, why couldn't those guys that destroyed her kpekus marry her? Instead she and her poverty stricken family planned and sucked the man dried until he has nothing left. E be like say ur brain wet
The last time i checked the lady didn't beg him to marry her

1 Like

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by seguno2: 6:30pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.

When you are sure about your gender , you can be taken seriously.

Ehinjuola:
My name is Dimeji (not real name tho), I'm in my final lap in one of the prestigious uni in Nigeria.

It happens my fiancee and I have been dating for long now, recently she discovered that she missed her period (though I'm not happy with it and at the same time I don't want ab*rtion) and couple the fact that I really love this lady and I want future with her.

I want to quickly do her introduction before the bump is visible n I have taken a bold step by taken my parents to hers for unofficial intro before the real intro which has been set for next two months.

But recently I do observe that she do post on her status about praying not to choose wrongly in term of relationship, (she has once asked me whether I don't feel we are rushing things in one of our conversation one time like that) plus the fact that whenever I called her recently the vibe is not there any longer, this is the person we are both serious with the relationship oo Infact she's the one that's pushing thing initially.

My question now is that, Is it anxiousness or marriage phobia or early pregnancy symptoms or she's just confuse or the feeling of not been ready that's worrying her? (She will be 26 next month)
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Manuella4ace: 6:42pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.

You're a foolish woman, when I did my trad the list sef my wife was telling her dad that it was too much , they even made some adjustments, the money I came with, I had enough change with me when I was going home.

My wedding I invited family and few friends and it was at my compound.

I blame your husband for taking a loan to marry a coconut head like you, your family imposed the list on him even made him to buy a cow, and hire a hall, doing a big wedding and now his broke and working his ass out to offset the loan he took and youre here saying trash

See where you got it wrong @ bolded

1 Like

Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by ACE1010: 6:47pm On Aug 09, 2023
Gr8mind07:
Knowing the financial strength of your husband, you could have mediated to get the burden on him reduced. He expected that but to his disappointment he didn't get it from you.

You & your family should have remembered that there is life after the marriage ceremony. However, I will suggest you try to appeal to him.and see how you can join hands in offsetting the loans incurred.

A supportive wife is always the delight of every man
God bless you Bro 🙏
One bottle of champagne and a bag of AGBADO for you 😜😜😜😜
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by TenQ: 6:54pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.
Please call yourself a big fool who doesn't know that she destroyed with her own mouth and family greed the marriage she hopes to have.

If you want a solution, reply sensibly and I will give you wisdom for damage control.
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by YoungBlackRico(m): 6:58pm On Aug 09, 2023
You no get sense at all
Re: New Marriage About To Crash. by Nursepepeye(f): 7:08pm On Aug 09, 2023
Ehinjuola:
My husband is not the same man I fell in love with.

My husband changed totally after wedding day, in fact, it started on the wedding night and its giving me a lot of concern.

It's not that he is not talking to me or we are fighting, but he is not the cheerful happy person anymore.

After months of trying to get what the problem is, he finally opened up to me and I don't know what my fault is, I think he is overreacting.

My husband works in an insurance company and he is just a junior staff, he earns 150k per month, so he is not doing that bad.

When we wanted to get married, my dad wrote the wedding list and everything he would bring, when he saw them, he fumed that they were too much and they should reduce it but my dad insisted that he won't collect it twice, I also told him if he really loves me, he would provide them, he could get help from his family too, it is called bride price and other things, and it is once.

We had little issue then but he later resolved it.

He brought everything they ask him for

During the wedding, my parents told him to buy a cow, rent a hall and decorate it then they'll take care of other things. He said he didn't have money for a big hall and he would prefer a field ground but my dad insisted that rain could disrupt things and he has many people coming.

That almost cause issues too, I had to support him with 50k to get the hall because I know who my dad is, he won't back out.

I didn't know how he did it, he took the hall and designed it, he bought cow too.

His family brought food and everything went fine and that was it.

I don't know what was keeping him moody until he spoke up.

He said I couldn't fight for him, I was there supporting my parents and watch them extorting him, did I even know he had to collect loan to pay for those things?

I got angry because he used the word 'extorting'.

He was the one that wanted to have my hand in marriage and if he cherish me, he should do all they wanted since he is not paying twice.

After I said this, he stopped talking in the house, he comes home, eat and go to bed.

I tried talking to him but he would listen but not talk, he is cold to himself and prefer his privacy.

Have I said something wrong?

I don't like whats happening. My marriage is too young to be going through all these.

I am tired, I don't know what to do.
everything about you and your father is wrong, you are even saying you know your father won't back out. I blame your husband, he would have cancelled the wedding instead of what he's doing right now.

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