₦airaland Forum

JJay1:
Truth is that theres no gain without pains. A lot of people complain of the bank jobs because of laziness. If you want to get to the top, expect difficult times and NEVER settle for convinience

My advice is that if you are passionate about being an engineer, why not take the banking job, save hard for about a year and pursue a Masters degree in engineering (possibly abroad), will will make it easier to pick up a good engineering job later. It is when you are trying to climb up to management levels in your engineering field that you will see that you banking experience will give you an edge

You can try University of Aberdeen or any good school in Europe.

But if you settle for the 60K engineering job, you'll struggle to make a good living for yourself and what would you have achieved in the medium term, not much if you ask me.

My thoughts exactly.

iice:
[color=#9900ff]@Topic
Na by force? [/color]

search me!

@poster, which one are you?

If he's Italian or French, yes. I particularly think Italians have the sexiest accent with bad English. I could sit all day listening to them. Had this girl at work, I would just make conversation with her so she could speak with that Italian accent.

ADUEYOMAMEBE: Them find my trouble tire, them no see am ( sorry, I couldn't translate that in proper English).

4Him:
Question 8 just got me stumped!

LOL. Na true. ( A voice crying in the wilderness  )
Where do I send my answers, biko? OK, just got it.

She should stop being so desperate.

Hmm. Wondering if this is some kind of fantasy? 
I'm with you liarliar(what a name)

Alright, blacklion, I didn't take all that into consideration. In that case, a person who does that and leads the mate along for such a long time without speaking the truth is a true actress and deserves an Oscar for her performance.

And thou shall love the Lord thy God with all thine heart and with all thy soul and with all thy might.
(somewhere in deut, 4:6 or 6:4)

This is more than meets the eye. What sane girl in Nigeria would refuse an offer to study abroad, especially the US? And when you say 10k, is that in dollars? Sorry to say but that girl has something up her sleeve if she's asking you for 10k in dollars. Don't let her milk you. Make out a day and call her and ask her what her plans are for the future. You can't be there sweating it while she wants to live it up in Nigeria. She's your sister, so obviously, she's your first priority, so she has the right of first refusal so to say. Don't give in to any pressure to keep sending money to her. She may play the emotional card but what you are offering her is more than anyone can do. Still speak to her and see how it goes. Also, like the last poster said, try to make some enquiries. She might be influenced by some scheming people who see her as their meal ticket through you. I presume she's young which means she's impressionable.

+osisi:
na wa.

What is the war, my dear? This is the vault of secrets, init?

I think men get what they ask for. I don't know how you can date someone and even be married for so long and not have an inkling of her educational level. Didn't they ever chat or was it just shagging all the way between them? Some of the most memorable times of my life were uni and youth service and these are things that constantly crop up in my conversations with people. What about pictures? Besides, why all this confiding in "friends" who want to become super "advisers"? Typical of men, when they want a way out they look for some excuses and sympathy to justify their actions.

abbey10:
Shagged my relation.
I couldnt tell anyone.
She died last year.

that's a tough one.
My family members don't know I lived in Ghana and returned to Nigeria and lived for about 2 years before eventually going to England. No one in my family knows till today. Only my ex's family know.

Nigeria is out of the nations cup. This is one of those times I'm sure glad to be single. Phew!

ops:
@annamaria
Babe have you got issues!

excuse me, have we met before? 

oziomatv:
Don't you care about the lonely nights?

spoilsport, i'm talking about the good parts, not the lonely nights.

Hmm, let me see
1. not having to cook.
2. not having to pick up after somebody.
3. not having to worry about his whereabouts when he comes home late.
4. yes, not having to watch the effing nations cup.
5. lying in bed with all my books around me.
6. not having to be nice to some obnoxious in-laws.
7. not having to discuss the effing US elections endlessly. or the iraq war. or nigerian politics.
8. being able to read silly romance novels and dream again.

i could go on but i'll stop here for now.

sick, sick, sick. dirty linen in public. that gbenga's head needs serious examining. 

as winch dey know winch, na so ogbanje dey know ogbanje. why do u want to change anything?

what's a run's girl? i think i'm behind in my vocabulary.

i like my pastor.

CANCER in many ways. But life of the party and funny, I'm not.

I will be travelling to London with my friend for Christmas. We need a short let accommodation from the 20th of December to the 14th of January.  Budget is up to 300pounds per week. Any ideas?

Brother (in law). Can you imagine sleeping with your own brother? To me this is a bit like that and it's called INCEST. Maybe if you saw it in that light, you would stop any kind of feelings for this animal brother who does not mind sleeping with his own sister (in law)? I do not believe what happened between the two of you happened over night. It must have developed over time. You should have known it was inappropriate and stopped the feelings by rationalising yourself out of it.

I would  never recommend confession. You have to carry this cross for the rest of your life; that is if your brother(in law) does not let the cat out of the bag. Nevertheless, whatever the consequences, you have to live with it.

Best of luck, babe, cos, only you can get yourself out of this mess and only you can live with yourself after this mess.

c_blow:
hmm, na wah oh

And what is the war here, Mr C Blow?

Nada.

Thank you all for your responses. I appreciate you all.

@iyanlax, you are right, I'm just coming to terms with everything. My shock absorbers seem to have worn off. So I'll take it day by day and try to give myself time to heal.

@Louis Vuitton, annyfy4eva and janami and wahome, I appreciate your encouragement.

@Naja Haje and Nautillus, I know what you mean. I tire for myself sometimes.

@Terminator, someone once suggested I see a psychiatrist. I have actually been reading many self help books and praying. I would consider christian counselling if I could find good relationship counsellors.

Thank you all so very much. I feel better now that I've let it out. I was carrying the burden myself and sharing it with you has made it lighter. God bless you.

@moyosore85, I dont get your point. Please read and understand.

My ex left me abruptly for someone else. I took in it at the time and started immediately rebuilding my life and putting myself back together. I've gone into business which has been yielding some good fruits, thank God. I chose to forgive and let it all go and did not allow myself to be bugged down by all that happened. I made some entreaties for reconciliation because I thought 9 years was a long time to invest in a relationship and not have anything to show for it. In short, I've had to start life completely afresh and thanks to kind relatives, I've had a roof over my head for the past few months while recovering from the shock of the abrupt end of the relationship and doing my business as well. I met a married man who was very keen on me but because I made a vow not to date a married man, I just had to end the friendship. I've been socialising but I haven't really met anyone. The thing now is that for the past few weeks, I have been missing this man who was incredibly cruel to me. I can't tell my family because they saw first hand how cruelly the guy treated me, completely abandoned me to my fate and went off with a younger woman whom he impregnated and clandestinely married without even his family's consent. The madness now is that I miss him terribly because there was so much we had together, so much we shared. We had our unique jokes and sometimes I read stuff and he's the first person I'm thinking of sharing it with. I don't even know how I can be with another man, I can't even begin to imagine it, yet I know I just have to have faith. But I miss my ex. I still miss him. We hardly communicate with each other, just ocassional texts. I find that easier. We are both in the same town and I have not seen him since we parted over 6 months ago. I just can't seem to get him out of my head.