₦airaland Forum

OP,

sometimes we think that being friends means that love relationship can also work. Not always so. There are some ladies I like so much and adore but I also know that a relationship won't work. Lots of people cannot appreciate or accept that fact and get involved. At the end, it crashes.
But that friendship can still remain if no party was seriously heartbroken by it.

Depending on the level of maturity and friendship before the love affair, both might still remain friends. In that case, such an invite is ok. But if I think my presence could cause jealousy or discomfort, I won't attend. In fact, I keep some distance from female friends when they get married. Just to protect their marriage because some men are very jealous/insecure. Some have interpreted it as me being unhappy because they got married. Which is completely wrong.

In reality, you can never really tell how many of the guests present once had an affair with your new wife or hubby. People don't reveal everything even in the best relationships. So the current commitment is what matters.

I think it's a good thing. I sat a few feet from GMB in 1984 when he was making a speech. At about age 40, his speech/accent was already hard to understand.
It's even more difficult now understanding his elderly voice.

He was the smartest looking soldier I ever saw though. I wanted to join the Air Force via DSS later but dad opposed it.

Na wa o. Rivers/seas are not to be played with o. Very risky.

RIP young blood.

cheruv:
You've spoken the truth..
Master,allow me to pay homage to your mother.

Thank you Sir.

What about their families?

OkparaJesus:
Ever ready to kill another in my community

If true, what exactly is the difference between you and Boko? They kill for religion, you kill for a sexual practice between two adults that is different to yours. Suppose some decides to kill you for eating the type of food he hates?

If Americans want something, they get it. If GMB refuses, he won't stay more than 4 years in power. Now we can see one major reason why GEJ was disliked by America. He signed it into law. Na 9ja be this. You can never tell what the likes of Tinubu subtly agreed to do in return for American support against GEJ.

How come we didn't hear this sooner?

papaejima1:
tell me what you drink my man, whenever we meet I will give you a carton of it.

My brother, seriously it's annoying. Issues are staring us in the eyes, yet we pretend.

We need to have an honest debate about our corporate existence. A National Conference is not enough. Everything needs to be on the table. Biafra war needs to be revisited honestly.

Igbos like all other human beings just want fairness and honesty. We're smart enough to address that in 9ja.

I don't believe that if things had been handled properly in the First Republic, Biafra war would have happened. Igbos were by far the most integrated Nigerians nationwide. My mum mourned Igbo kids she delivered that never returned from SE after Biafra war, till the day she passed on.

Dim Ojukwu, born in the North, partly raised in the SW, was more NIGERIAN than most people. That he spear-headed Biafra shows that something went terribly wrong with us along the line.

It is irrelevant who is president or senate president if they cannot take us forward. I see some people gloating and boasting that Igbo will never rule 9ja. Those who have been ruling since, where did they take us?

Good luck to him.

felai:
"Living in an area"

iamtosin can u please make it clearer

Actually, area of residence can affect job prospect. In a place like London, if you're living in certain areas, better not put the address in your cv.

Those middle class people have prejudice against those living in poorer areas. In London, your post code changing from SE to SW next street can attract £400 more in rent per month. Some people living in one area of London all along may not even know. Some people pay over the top just to avoid certain post codes.

If you move only with fellow blacks, you may not even know.

Even me Africa man, there are certain areas I avoid going to if I can. Prejudice is very widespread: race, religion, wealth/poverty, area of residence, profession, education and so on. FACT.

abdulwastecx:
I think the trend is changing now, people want to have soft skill because white colar jobs are.not readily available. People are learning skills like computarized auto mechanics, furniture making, building construction etc.

The population is big, market is huge, skill is what is required to live in this country. with anti corruption properly in place civil service job will become unattractive

My furniture maker doesn't have any apprentice now. 15 years he had like 6. "They have either gone to higher institutions or used leg to trek abroad", according to the carpenter.

If indeed they can learn skills, good. But many don't want to sweat. Handwork is hard work.

So with all the poverty, Boko killing left & right, nothing works, a bunch of people doing Biafra Radio is our biggest worry?

Why are people so afraid of Igbos leaving? Nobody ever asked any tribe in Nigeria if they want to be part of Nigeria. If you ask various tribes, many may decide not to be part of it.

I'd rather live in a country with 10 million people where things work, my life is safe/sacred, my rights are respected, with prosperity, than live in a lame-duck behemoth on its knees for over 50 years.

Nigerians queue for visas to Austria, Switzerland, Holland, Belgium, Ireland, Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Finland etc. These are all fairly small but successful countries.

And I'm not Igbo.

abdulwastecx:
I think we need to make rooms for more technical base and engineering education. You obviously need more artisans and technicians than engineers and technologies, the current situation where everyone wants to go to the university is not encouraging.

A third world country like ours need to train more artisans and technicians to help us in our industrialization drive, mining and agriculture

You're correct. That was the mandate of poly & mono-technics.
But where is the electricity for artisans industry??

So instead polys/monos now compete with university degree holders for equality to work in banks and so on.

Usually, mostly those who don't make university grades or don't have long leg go to polys.

Even if you train OND electricians and carpenters, they would end up looking for office jobs.

Better have an educated population than an uneducated population. Even if just for the sake of it.

Many brilliant ones will get jobs abroad. Like 9ja doctors doing well abroad.

emmatok:
Well US is a developed country.
The woman and her boyfriend got no excuse here.
If you fight for the woman, what about the men that gave her the poison.

Lol. Not boyfriend by ex-husband of her own sister, but happens to be brother of the guy she always wanted to marry.

She's 17. Perhaps already married before even 16. Should a guy me marrying an under-age girl?

I feel sorry for the dead guy but the blame goes round.

Marry a lady who doesn't love you & you're toying with death.

If she was older and actually planned it, she could have had him shot by assassins. You know how many murders are never resolved. Even that of an attorney-general & minister of justice.

SGOD11111:
. Yes it is my friend but u have to a patient man

Just emailed you again.

emmatok:
In some develop countries she will be tried as an adult.
Some Kids are sentenced for murder in US.

US law nor be here o.
I hardly count US penal system as that of a developed country. Very brutal.

US law doesn't really consider the effect of social issues on criminality. After all, the laws are enacted and enforced by the privileged.

You make guns yakpa everywhere like candies, and then you're surprised that unhinged youths shoot people.

Rehab is not a miracle centre.

Any Rehab is only as good as the patients are ready to co-operate with them.

It takes a lot of hard work, commitment, iron will and absolute determination to succeed. You must also have a reason to want to succeed: kids, wife, parents etc.

Cammo:
Evil woman

An underage girl forced to marry a guy she doesn't love.

In developed countries, only few years in a juvenile correctional facility. The ex-in-law (herbalist) should spend longer in jail if indeed he gave her the poison & instructed/instigated her to use it.

The father carries the most blame. 9 or 10 kids (depending on your maths) and two wives, without ability to even educate them.

Sadly, the father has no legal culpability in the murder. He too would deserve some jail time for his recklessness in my opinion.

We can see why Nigeria went to the dogs. No be today.

Imagine that Awo, Zik, Ajasin, Maitama Sule, Alex Ekwueme and other technocrats were manning the affairs of this country a few years after the civil war?

But here we have army boys barely 30 years old, without any political grounding churning out decrees.

That Murtala destroyed the far better civil service we inherited at independence. He sacked massively. It became a tribal/sectarian thing after that.

omisakint:
So if you were rape by boko haram and you got pregnant.. You will keep it abi?

The baby can still be given out for adoption if she choses to have a Boko baby. Selective abortion where the mother might suffer physical or mental problem, is one of the legal reasons for allowing abortion in countries where laws are followed like UK, Germany, etc.

By the way, what the percentage of girls doing abortion in Ibadan, Lagos, Abuja, Enugu, Nnewi, PH, Benin, Yenagoa, Sokoto, Illorin are raped by Boko?

I met an Igbo guy in the 1990s who said his dad made huge money trading egusi between North & East.

Wahala dey o. Doing lot of skin damage. Eroding protective skin pigment. Now candidate for skin cancer living in a hot sunny country.

A good collector's item.

koyyes:
I know you are too daft to understand all i have said. I guess it's true what people say. You can take a man out of the ghetto but you can't take the ghetto out of him. Your moniker says it all. Angry quack negro forming fulfilled yankee returnee. You are a failed 'project'.

Very sad & angry individual. So he doesn't know that monikers say little about people. Pele o. Nor worry. Pray hard. You might get visa to North Korea one day. Hahahaha.

Your anger & sadness nor be hear o. Abeg see TB Joshua or your local Marabout in Mushin for deliverance.

Since you don't have any sense of humour, good luck to you in your endeavours. I'm done. Bye.

koyyes:
Probably the brothels you run to put food on your table. And why would i be angry? I'm not the supposed married man (as you implied in your other comment) who reasons like a quack. Next time you want to argue, create concrete facts and not all the trash you cooked from that empty headed skull of yours. Don't join your wife in bed. be here talking with your anus. Mr association of married oloshos.shior!

Hahahahaha. Sorry. My work is rather quiet tonight. God is looking after his children, my work is less. Thanks for caring anyway.

Quack. Ok o. My Eminent & Nobel Prize-winning profs trained a quack. I hear o.

Chai, why are you so angry? You're because you insult like a trooper. You also have a major issue of unhappiness. Hence you attack anyone who is happy.

That some men are actually hard-working, don't impregnate women about, straight-talking and are honest/responsible family men? It doesn't sit well with your negative view of men I know.

It is well dear. Just have faith and a good one will come your way. Life can be fun & fulfilling. Ndo, pele.

koyyes:
At least if you become this desperate to lie, come up with more constructive points. Where are the statistics to prove this bull shiit you've just spewed? It has now become necessary for a regular visitor of brothels to use his findings in a brothel as a case study because he believes in his mind that it represents women of all class,race and profession? Any reasonable being who reads this will clearly see how subjective and unprofessional you are. Shame.

Please point out the lies here. What exactly are the lies? Brothels? Have you ever seen me in your brothel before?

Well, if you lie, I don't. What is unprofessional about it? Please clarify. Just talking without anything concrete is not enough? Unprofessional according to which standards or professional body regulations? Angry Women Council's regulations?

Maybe your society makes telling lies rewarding. I left 9ja as a teenagers. I had long years of studies, regulated by the strictest code of conduct there is. Even small lies can get you struck off, 10 to 15 years of education & training down the drain.

I don't know why you believe one can can just tell lies like that. Maybe that's normal where you are.

MarieSucre:
This has nothing to do with feminism. Its the realities of the society we live in.

Say the woman also wears a female condom(That's assuming the man does), and it fails. The man doesn't want to be a father. Of course it is easier for him to bail out on the relationship (if there was one) and the growing result of such(the baby). But the woman doesn't have such luxury.

Her body is showing physical proof i.e a growing tummy not to count all the orisirisi symptoms of nausea, wretching, dizziness, swollen feet, irregular appetite. Then the nosy world around her;
IN HER FRONT
what happened?
who is the father?
is he gonna take responsibility?
How will you cater for it?
Do your parents know?(depending on where she is in life)

AT HER BACK
I first know say she be Ashewo!
Na that guy she na im give am belle??
I wonder how she fit dey commit for street with that big thing. e.t.c

All these while they guy can be in another state, another country doing his thing and no one would know that part of his proteins are causing a major shift in a girl's life elsewhere.

mind you the baby has not even been born yet.
So never, ever, ever underestimate what a pregnancy, especially and illegitimate one can do to a girls life

My dear, much of these things have been discussed before. Women should sit down (if possible with help from NGOs) and decide what they want and what's good for them.
The average girl now knows that sex without condom can lead to pregnancy, STIs etc. They also know that a guy you're not married to can bail out. He also might not be your only sex partner. There is also emergency contraceptive (morning after pill).
Arguing won't help anyone, people who claim to fight for women should go out there and enlighten/empower women.

In a place like 9ja, the only argument I accept is that poverty affects lots of women. The guy with the economic power (pays her school fees, rent, maintenance) might be too powerful for the girl to deny him raw sex. Because she depends on him.

Therefore, emphasis should be on empowering women to be more independent. Shikena.

koyyes:
educate yourself boy, who told you condom gives 100 % protection? Learn to accept that a part of the blame is caused by your likes that elope when the deed has been done. If you consider yourself man enough to have intimacy, you should be ready to man up and face the consequences that may follow. Quit the feminism bull shiit. The tradition of your ancestors proves me right.

Ok, let me see how educated you're without checking Google: How effective is condom as a contraceptive? What are your chances of pregnancy after a single intercourse with ejaculation, if both man & woman have average fertility??

My experience when I was single was alarming. Very worrying. 95% of women: lawyer, accountant & so on never insisted on condom. I'm even talking of a Western country. I don't even want to imagine how the less educated go about theirs. A place where the Ministry of Health has disseminated so much information about HIV/STIs for over 30 years now. The sheer recklessness of it. I never did without condom. NEVER. A guy who dips his thing into what could be a public toilet is utterly reckless anyway.

I have never had a baby aborted. THANK GOD.


Some women claim condom is painful.

Angry women always look for men to blame for everything.

So just because condom is not 100% effective, you rather not use it at all. Na wa o.

koyyes:
You can talk, dream, sleep, eat, shit and piss out feminism like your life depends on it. My opinion still stands because i know it to be the truth. If all females were to say no to sex, males like you will be mating with animals without regrets.

Lol. So women have sex just to do men a favour? Women don't enjoy sex. Tortoise & hare story.

I know what I see women insert into their VJ in my line of work. We have to extricate all manner of objects from it.

Anyway, I said no to raw sex. Maybe you need reading glasses.

koyyes:
Because the male folks responsible are not ready to become fathers. I'm sure the study was mostly carried out in black dominated communities where you have hit and run males.

Except you mean where they rape people.

A woman old enough to have sex should be able to say no to raw sex. And should know to protect herself/her body. How often do women take care of matters that men would suffer from if it happens?

Is there anything feminist-wannabe won't blame men for?

omisakint:
Better than having bastards

So killing is better than having an illegitimate child?

Wow! We can begin to understand Boko logic then. Killing an infidel is better than having them alive.