₦airaland Forum

Sanboy25: Hum thanks for the advice, I'll try to take on me...

You shouldnt be fighting often. Tell me more about the 2 45 yr olds? Were you alone? Were they armed? Was it late at night?

Sanboy25:
Lol, sure I wouldn't go against a man like Hulk Logan, but if it's a regular boy, and a 1-one-1 match... I'll try my luck...

And get your beautiful face scarred? I wouldnt advise it unless it was the only way. Try and avoid conflict where possible.

Sanboy25:
I'd fight back anyone who attacks me of course !
I'm not a punching ball, you can't hit me and expect me to not retaliate...
As for this guy, he better walk away, of course.

Sometimes you have to be smart. If you are outmatched, you might be seriously hurt... especially where cult boys are concerned.

But you do have to stand your ground if you are attacked.

Sanboy25:
That's defending against an attack. Lol he should
But don't worry, I'll not wait for somebody to come to defend me, I'd fix the guy's problem me myself right away..

Really? You would fix a cult boy? This guy is being threatened. His life is in danger. He has to fight or walk away.

25omega: She asked for a break with no reason? here are some reasons

1. she is seeing a guy and doesn't want to feel guilty

2. you did something that you are oblivious to and she got tired of waiting for your apology

3. Her family told her to get away from you

4. she was about to have sex with a dude. This way when you find out she can say "we were on a break"

5. she found out you are broke

6. some guy told her he would take her on a shopping spree

7. Some guy who just landed from overseas (if you are in Nigeria) showed interest in her

8. Or she is just a cold hearted B who doesn't care about your feelings

Usual story.

DoubleFaith: I will agree with you, it can be changed permanently ONLY by the person. He/she alone can make the decision, disipline himself/herself and be dedicated to it. But for you to go into a relationship thinking you can change your partner's CORE trait permanently, I beg to disagree.

I agree too, that only the individual can change their core trait.

Sanboy25:
I girl should not fight for me a man in any situation... yet we still see that too often...
A man should fight for his wife undeniably, but his girlfriend ? No.

So if a guy slapped you in front of your boyfriend, he should whistle and then walk away?

Monicasque: not me personally because i feel i am tall. I am 1.65 and for me a short guy would not be ideal but i know many short guys who are in good relationships

Ok. So you wouldnt give the guy a chance... interesting.

vizboy: average,tall,short all the same. Height doesnt really matter when it comes to matter of the heart

Yes, but how to first fall in love? There needs to be that initial attraction. This is difficult without the initial attraction.

vizboy: Lmao I cant stop Laughing with the headlines am seeing today in the romance department.

@op no worries just enter the market. I be average guy but i got lot of them b1tches

But you are not short. Would it be as easy if you were short?

DoubleFaith: The point is CORE traits. He/she cant change his/her core traits permanently. Other minor traits can be changed permanently. Most times the change is gradual, so change from good to bad is noticeable and can be checked.

Core traits can be changed permanently. Nothing is 100% guaranteed when it comes to character. It is unlikely but it is possible.

Yungwizzzy: Every body's saying NOPE!! So 'true love' cant supass oppresion? Na wa 4 9ja guys o lolz

I said yes

Nomski0: Do you mean like akin and rawpaw short or a little below average?

Only if he has a ferrari

Monicasque: Short men get woman all the time. There is a lot of hope actually

Do you like short men?

Mrs..Chima:
The kind where relationships are strong and commitments are evident.

Good, good... you get an A+ for that. But what else, surely there must be more than that. Isnt passion important in relationships too

And what if she was assaulted? Would you stand by and watch? If someone threatened you, they are bullying you and you have every right to defend yourself. Yes I would fight for a lady if it came to it.

Mrs..Chima:
Wrong people are hooking up for the wrong reasons.

Really? So what are the "right" reasons?

DoubleFaith: My dear, it's very simple. If you can live with those 2 things you dont like after confirming that he/she cant change, then your relationship is perfect that is if you dont always bring it up as an issue.
Just know that CORE traits cannot be changed permanently. It's either you learn to accept it and do not bring it up as an issue in your relationship Or you move on. Simple!

I agree. it is best to try and live with it or move on. Trying to get the person to change is a no no.

What about if the person changed from what you wanted into something you are not keen on? Would you end it or hang on?

Monicasque: its a break not a break up. Give it to her maybe she has some issues that she needs to sort but also expect the worst. Maybe this might be a way for her to see if you can't be replaced

It is never a break up until you ladies confirm that your "hidden" squeeze is more dependable. Then it becomes a breakup.

@OP, dont listen to her... listen to me . A break is a break up.

kulyie: and the only way the female folk can free themselves of this is by econonic independence instead of obseesing about marriage.a financially and intellectually independent woman is very difficult to take advantage of except if she chooses to be a victim.more often than not once a woman is not economically dependent on a man and is not looking for his approval to boost her self esteem,the world will literarily be at the palm of her hands,but what do we have today,women who have little or no self development,economically and intellectually,depending on a man for almost everything and looking up to him for approval,why wont they always be the victim

This is true but there are stumbling blocks and greater challenges for women to make it career wise. This is why it is not as easy to follow a career as a woman.

Handsomeemmy: You may have a point there, some ladies 's behaviour sometimes baffles me, some of them don't make effort to mend their relationship and it is like getting a break is the in thing in most relationship now. @OP do you know any reason why she will ask for a break, do you suspect if she seeing someone else, maybe richer than you, have somethings you don't have? cars house, good job? so sorry for me having to ask such question, it is my experience with the flimsy excuse some people for wanting a break that is why i'm asking.

Chances are she wants to move on. She probably already has a replacement but wants to test the waters first. The person may be unreliable. Pnce the break works out well it will become permanent. My assumptions of course.

captainnigeria: Sometimes he makes me feel like crap.he has done nothing to deserve my hatred but i just don't know.i guess its my parents always praising and being like why can't u be more like ur brother.

I take it that you are the black sheep of the family? It will get worse. He will be more successful and your hate will grow into resentment. He will have a better woman, car, house, career and you will always be in awe of him. Then he will keep you at arms length because secretly he knows you hate him.

The only way to prevent all this is to try and change your ways and try to appreciate him more.

It might not make a relationship better but if done well, with mutual consent and respect and from a position of appreciation it can be the best thing... so why not.

Handsomeemmy: HMMMM....indefinite? that is kind of harsh, do you know if the op have much feeling for her?

Why take the risk? If it cannot be sorted out without a break then a break is just going to make it worse. Better to end it.

TEA esq™:
Aahhhh!!! Any guy who breaks my heart deserves this kinda punishment

What if you break his heart? Should he throw all your belongings across the street?

190: ehen if she wants a break

U give her the break

are u supposed to be begging a woman

damn n-i-ggaz these days so thirsty and dont know how to handle a woman

Exactly. She will f@@@ like mad and if it works out the break will become indefinite. If it does not she will come back and claim she had some stuff to sort out.

If i were the OP I would make that break indefinite.

Divepen: her parent would not like it
SHE IS A VIRGIN,as i want to believe
the guy is a real player

Ok....

Go on...

Divepen: she is a young girl and she seems to be blindly in love in with him

What is his character like? Is he serious with her? Can she handle the intimacy appropriately? Does she want to do it or is she being pressured into it? Does he have other girls? Does she have other dudes? What does she want out of the relationship? Is she a virgin? What has she got to lose if she bonks him?

Divepen: she asked me to advice her like her sister

Then give her good advice. I cannot discern her relationship with the guy to advise if it is a yes or no on such an action. We need more details.

Monicasque: morning Ath

Morning babes

mondi_cheeks: My spiritual hymen is intact.. Virgin in christ

What does that mean? What is a spiritual hymen?

donroxy: A condition whereby Someone never had any sexu..al relationship with another person !!!

More detail please? Any form of se.x or just penetrat.ive vag.inal se.x?

plaetton: Unfortunately, everything seem to work against the female gender in our semi-primitive pre-industrialized society.
The economic system , the political system are built in favour of men.
The women always need to depend on men for sustenance.

Also, we have a very corrupt system that has over the many decades, infiltrated our domestic and social relationships. Corruption seem to have a greater and more devastating impact on a society when the economically disenfranchised females get corrupted. This is because the females are the pillars of society, so when they are corrupted, the society begins to lose its moral cohesion.

So what we have today in Nigeria is that because of entrenched system of economic and political disenfranchisement, women have become more needy, more desperate, and therefore much more corrupt.

Another unfortunate thing for women is that, unlike men, a woman's sexuall history is often permanently imprinted on her psyche , and this leaves long lasting behavioural cues in the way of attitudes, pretences, deceit and secrecy.
In other words, ladies are afraid to reveal their true selves to their prospective mates out of fear of revealing too much of their corrupt past. Men don't have that same problem . Our society does not require men to be chaste.

Most men can pick up on these behavioural cues, so they play along for the ride until it suits them to walk away.
A man can read and analyse a lady on the first date , no matter how pretentious the lady tries to be.
By the second date, the relationship is already over and the woman is hardly even aware.

In a nutshell. A total, accurate analysis. Look at the virgin issue. People quote the bible and Koran when mentioning virginity with women but when we ask about male virgins they get suspiciously quiet. It is obvious that more needs to be done by men in society, government and society as a whole to make things better for women, to support them financially and give them proper rights. They are almost in servitude .