₦airaland Forum

chiwetaluAGU:
Boys and Girls has no right to premarital sex. Not to talk of exclusive access to their private parts. By Boys and Girls i mean anyone who hasnt tasted matrimony. Assuming you are refering to married people, then your opinion comes in. Small boys should stop destroying people's daughters future. Likewise the girls ruining the destiny of our young boys in the name of affair..
Note: Even if you like be 50yrs, as long as you are still unmarried ... you are still in this category.
Shoult out to my fellow married peeps.
Ndi Nne maama ... isokwa
Ndi Nna paapa ... isokwa

Kwaba nu iko na onwerrooo
*drops mic*

you are completely on point

Apina:
The basic question I ask when I hear such stories is; why put yourself in such a position in the first place?

devil smiled at her and she reciprocated.

OZAOEKPE:
I would ask her is she moaned , if her answer is yes its over but if she said no I go probate her.

lol, it could be you too as no one is above mistake.

Many youths of today have likened relationship to be s ex which shouldn't be so.

Relationship and s ex might work hand-in-hand but it shouldn't be incorporated at the wrong time.

The opportunity for courtship is being abused on a daily basis just because we try to make relationship work through s ex.

So many young girls have involved themselves in premarital s ex which has led to unwanted pregnancy which some will abort while some will be forced to give birth at a tender age.

Everything in life is by stage. Yes, it is not possible you wake up one day and conclude that you want to get married without having someone you are dating that you have known for some months.

But the fact is that relationship and sex are two different things that should only be linked at the appropriate time.

So many men made their lady believe that if the lady did not have s ex with them then she doesn't love them.

See, if you want to love, nobody will stop you from loving anybody, but don't pretend to love when your ultimate goal is to get under her.

Don't make her believe that sex makes relationship stronger.

Premarital s ex doesn't make any relationship stronger, it kills the relationship especially when the intention is not for marriage.

Even at a stage, couples that didn't involve in premarital s ex get tired of having s ex with each other, then if that is the case, are you not making it a bit faster to lose thirst for s ex?

I think ladies of this generation should have become wiser enough to decide about their life earlier than 18years.

Some men will only have s ex with a lady ones and that's all. You should be able to keep your precious self away from the beast in men.

Many men out there are no more interested in staying with a woman for so long, they will tell you they don't like eating a particular food twice but love to eat different kinds of food.

They will come to you and give you all the sweet words and you will gladly accept them and even release your body to them like sheep without Shepherd.

You are the only one that can destroy yourself. You only go into wrong hands if you did not say yes to the right person.

During courtship you are free to decide if you can cope with each other or not, and you can choose to continue or discontinue your relationship.

But now a days, ladies find it difficult to leave the beast they are into relationship with simply because they have engaged in s ex which has made her emotionally attached with the man.

That way, it will not be easy for her to say no when she should have said it.

Some men change immediately they have s ex with their lady. The s ex will automatically be an eye opener for them, they will want to explore more, thereby exposing them to any other things in skirt.

I am not saying it is not good to introduce s ex in your relationship, but it is necessary to introduce it at the appropriate time to avoid the series of disadvantages associated with it.

It makes relationship stronger but this is for the couple and perhaps serious minded couple-to-be. Biblically it is not for those who are not married, in fact, it is a sin.

Some men are only interested in getting under a lady, but how will you decipher the true man from the fake? You can be safe if you keep your precious part till the right time.

Those that are even married can get divorced anytime let alone those that are not.

Though, some ladies are the cause of their own fall. They cannot do without s ex, and so many reasons got them so attracted to that which we might not blame them for some, while some are due to covetousness and love of money.

S ex in courtship can mar your marital life more than it can make it.

Be wise and never give yourself room to regret your impatient.

Source: http://bamisepeters..co.uk/2015/08/sex-will-make-your-relationship.html

This is a response to a question i was asked.

The girl told the guy the next day she had s3x with a guy after she was drunk.

Personally, I think we are humans and are bound to make mistakes, though some mistakes can be unforgivable but we just need to find the forgiving spirit because it might be our turn tomorrow.

"She really tried to have told you, other ladies out there will never mention it and you will think they are holy.

It means she really loves you and her conscience couldn't allow her to keep it as it might come up in the future which may be unforgivable by then.

Please pretend it didn't happen and move on, make her realise alcoholic drinks are not meant for her through series of cool communication and the need for her to desist from what can make such act come to reality again must be elaborated".

That was my response and it goes beyond this. When you are addicted to alcohol, things of this type are bound to happen.

If you did not destroy yourself you will destroy others because their secret can never be secured with you.

You will expose them and destroy yourself unknowingly, you only get to know when you are relieved, but what about the harm that has already been done?

Like i said earlier, he needs to forgive the girl, it wouldn't be easy, and the memory will keep lingering, but he must learn to clear it off with activities when the memory comes to mind, this is the only way he can survive with her in the relationship.

This is not just for the guy but for others in relationship, it wouldn't be smooth as we think it will be but with forgiving spirit and perseverance you will overcome the thorns.

Please feel free to add your advise or comment

Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2017/06/what-to-do-after-she-confessed-she-did.html

To some men it is natural for them to be polygamous when it comes to relationship.

In fact, some cannot be committed to just a woman, they feel they must eat from all available pots forgetting that the soup in some pots can rearrange their intestine.

There are so many consequences of having more than just a woman which are:

1. You spend more:

Especially those who earn little and cannot satisfy one woman with what they earn, yet, they are not contented with just that woman just because the woman is trying not to complain.

2. Always conscious:

Why won't you be conscious when you have skeleton in your cupboard knowing full well that some woman can kill when they know they have rival. This is when you use more than 10 security applications to lock your phone(s). You take your phone everywhere, even to the toilet, etc.

3. You think more:

Yes of course, you have to always trouble your brain since you are hiding one woman from the other.

Though at times one knows you have the main woman but what about the main woman that doesn't and must not know you have another one outside? The fear of her knowing is the beginning of war for you.

4. You waste more time:

Time is money. There are so many things you can achieve while wasting your time with other women. If not something that can fetch more money while not use your pleasure time with your woman and kid(s), must you always peep into other people's pot? Your friends are there, your biological family are there to share your free time with and not just wallowing about with someone else's property.

5. Unexpected end:

Some men knows the effect of poke-nosing, yet, they will never desist from it. You can infect your immediate home with incurable disease or other unforseen dangers.

The woman you flirt with outside can even kill you and cause sadness in you home.

If you must be polygamous why not just do it rightly when you have all it takes and not just putting yourself and your home in penury and danger.


Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2016/05/consequences-of-having-more-than-one.html

Often times we get attracted to another opposite sex outside our relationship/marriage.

This is not and shouldn't be a crime as far as i am concerned; what should be the concern is how to overcome the temptation that may arise from attraction.

Then, if you don't want to cheat on your spouse you need to deal with the opposite sex with caution.

The problem of attraction most times is the inability to control oneself which is common among men, not that women too don't fall prey anyways.

Attractions should make you strong and determined rather than break you.

Attractions should make you see the positives in your spouse rather than to want to take advantage of the attracted object.

Attractions should make you see reasons why you must adore every moment with your spouse.

Attractions should make you see reasons why you must not be distracted from your spouse even when the point of attraction is irresistible.

Being attracted to someone else should not affect how you feel about your partner, nor should it have any kind of negative effect on your relationship.

Attractions will only break your relationship/marriage if you allow it.

Let it rebuild you in order to be the best for your spouse and not destroy you and your home altogether.

Source: http://www.bamisepeter.com/2016/03/things-attractions-should-do-to-your.html

You have spoken well thought. However, some girls nags naturally, no matter what you do they still nag, the best bet is to let them be at that period so as not to escalate the issue.

So many marriages will/has failed due to so many reasons. Some of the cogent reasons are as follows:

1. Not knowing the partner properly:

Knowing one's partner is the purpose of courtship, but to some certain religion there is limit to courtship which doesn't give those that wish to be together for the rest of their life the room to know each other properly.

Within their so called "censored courtship" so many things could be hidden by any of the two parties just to make sure the other doesn't go away, and it will definitely come to play after they are married which might not be bearable for the other party.

For example, the chances of a woman whom due to the "censored courtship" couldn't establish her kitchen abilities in the man's house for him to examine and be satisfied with the ability of his wife-to-be is shaky because she might not be able to prepare good meals for the man not forgetting that stomach is the way to a man's heart, if a woman cannot cook such marriage is determined.

2. Poverty :

This is a very important issue when it comes to marriage, no matter the level of love, money is essential for its maintenance.

There must be money for food, to give the children quality education and to take care of other essential needs in the family.

3. Lack of wife's financial support :

Many women are the cause of their own family failure when the only thing they do is to sit down, sleep, wake, cook and not engage in fetching income for the family.

It is a most for the wife to financially engage herself in the running of the family. Full house wife is a big home breaker, not even in this century should a woman sit at home without doing something to fetch the family more income.

A family that the wife waits for the husband to give money for matches, food seasonings will break at any moment. A man will always be happy when he is assured that his back is covered.

4. Lack of proper communication :

Communication is essential in marriage. Proper communication makes the two parties to know what they lack at the appropriate time.

Proper communication makes differences to be very easy to resolve.

5. Not doing what you used to do when courting:

This is common among men, they tend to change immediately after marriage forgetting that most of the things they did while courting (plays, assistance, was responsible for the lady to have said "yes" to their proposal.

Ladies too are guilty of this offence. They tend to endure during the period of courting but immediately after marriage they bring out the beast in them, this attitude will never develop any marriage but destroy it.

6. S3x:

This is one of the major reasons of marriage failures. In some cases the husband might be very active sexually while the opposite is the case for the wife or vice versa.

One might look for other means If that person is not properly satisfied sexually not considering the other person.

This is very dangerous to do since sexual Intercourse brings about intimacy between the couple, sharing this intimacy with another person is deadly especially when the true partner get to know.

7. Time :

Most men/women are so particular about the financial status of the home forgetting that their wife/husband is another establishment that needs time to be explored.

No matter how much the money is being sort after there must be enough and reasonable time to be spared to spend with the wife/husband or perhaps with the kids. Leaving the woman/man for a long period of time may bring other destroying thought into her/his mind which will be detrimental to the home.

8. Not contented:

Any marriage will break if one of the couple isn't contented with whatever he/she derives from the house.

For example, the man must be contented with the meals even when something is wrong with it not forgetting that the wife is a human who is bound to be imperfect.

Sorting for a better meal due to the error committed by the wife might lead the husband to eat from the pot of the enemy which the result will definitely be against the marriage. And the couple must be contented with the sexual pleasure of each other or else such marriage is bound to break.

Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2015/01/8-causes-of-marriage-failure.html

Not everyone loves to cheat on their spouse but they end up being a cheat because of the way they relate with the opposite sex.

You don't want to cheat, yet, you look at other opposite sex lustfully.
You don't want to cheat and you give other opposite sex the opportunities you cannot even give your spouse.

You don't want to cheat yet, you are not contented in what ever you share with your spouse.

One thing we humans fail to remember as fast as possible is that no one is perfect. The area of your spouse's imperfection is the starting point of another person's.

The best thing is to utilise your period of courtship to understand each other's imperfection.

Once the relationship is sealed no more try and error, because it is a complex school where no one graduates till death comes according to the oath.

Once you are not satisfied with what she cooks, her mood, and the intimate time with your partner then you are lost.

Read Also: 3 major kinds of cheat

Also, there will be issues when a woman is not satisfied with the intimate time with her man and some other things he does.

If you keep reminding yourself of the qualities that got you attracted to your spouse, there is tendency of you not cheating on your spouse each time you mistakenly want to.

You also need to be careful of the friends you keep as many of them can lead you to do what you will otherwise not do provided you are not firm.

It is not easy to stay glued to one person for a long period of years, it is like eating one type of food all the time, but if it is your best food i am sure you can keep eating it on and on.

Though it is not easy as humans that we are, but try as much as you can to make your spouse the best thing in your life and you will keep giving your all to him/her each time.


Source: http://www.bamisepeter..com/2016/02/beware-of-opposite-sex-if-you-don-want.html

Please if you don't want to be among those guy she is playing around with why not just leave her. My advise is this, let her go, sort it out like two mature minds, let her know it cannot work not just because of what you discovered, but because you ainy seeing any future and no point in wasting each others time. Forget the good side of the sex and don't allow sex deny you of great future.

Ladies most of the times have taught guys one lesson or the other which has generated to negative conclusions.

Most guys of this century believes that you can win any woman once you have the resources(money).

The question is that if you have dated a girl and her approach towards you is always a Yes Yes when money comes to play does that implies that all of the girls are just lovers of material things?

Agreed, money is essential when we talk about relationship, but at the same time money is not everything. Love has its own place and it is the first that must be considered before money.

Most times, first impression you create matters.

Most times your first impression shows any lady the kind of relationship you want from her. A responsible lady who knows what she wants in a man will definitely not accept you if the kind of impression you create is the one that shows to her that you have the cash to spend around.

With such attitude such woman will know that you will place money above her after she agrees which will be very disastrous to her future.

Some guys don't even waste their time doing the needful when approaching a lady, they believe once they show the colour of money any lady will follow, this has earned many guys slap(s).

Accepted, there are girls that all they want is your cash, but don't make that mistake of generalizing that assertion.

As we have those that all they want is your cash, we also have those that they need all other qualities a man must possess to be a good husband from you.

Respect is what a woman wants and deserves from any man, if you place money or any material things above that respect, you will never get the Yes from any responsible lady.

What about being caring? Do you think money can solve that all the time? Being caring is one thing money cannot always cater for.

Ladies needs someone that will show them he will be available not only materially but physically and emotionally as well.

You must show her you care so that she will feel secured whenever she is with you.

If you are from a rich home don't be intoxicated by the riches, do you think this ladies don't know your level when we talk about the financial aspect? They want you to tell them what else you can offer apart from the wealth.

If you are from a well-to-do family or even a poor home, don't try to impress the lady financial so that you will not set the standard you cannot manage consistently because consistency is a huge factor that develops a good relationship.

You might not be buoyant financially at the beginning but the lady is also interested in your dreams.

Future determines a poor man and not the present. You will be shocked that if you work towards a realistic dream and you become rich a lady who denied you when you were not too financially stable will want to die just to have you. So, be yourself and don't be pushed by peer pressure.

Don't proclaim to a lady what you are not. If you start a relationship with lies, when the truth will come out it might not be able to repair the danger caused.


Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2015/05/some-common-mistakes-guys-make-to-get.html

For a marriage/courtship to be successful the criteria below should be observed:

1.Existence of natural love:

When i talk of natural love, i mean love that is "clauseless" . There are many people that loves "because of", love because of will never make a marriage/relationship last. For example, the common type of love of is the love because of wealth. We should remember that if something goes wrong and the wealth disappears end has automatically come to to such marriage/relationship.

Those that love because of beauty shouldn't forget that beauty fades, and a scar to beauty is capable of destroying the beauty, if such happens what is the fate of the beauty?

So, for marriage/relationship to long last, clause should not be attached to love but nature should take charge.

2. Readiness to forgive:

In a marriage/relationship its important to be ready to forgive. Forgiveness is an integral part of marriage which must not be taken with levity. The fact that we are humans makes us imperfect, so sin, misunderstanding is bound to occur.

Offence, misunderstanding is a bridge a marriage/relationship must pass through to move to next level, failure to scale through leads to destruction of any marriage/relationship, readiness to forgive prior to offence or misunderstanding will make any marriage/relationship stronger than expected.

3. Tolerance:

Staying with someone for a long time is not an easy task. We are humans we get tired of a particular thing.

When we talk about marriage/relationship, it goes beyond friendship or relation. You shouldn't get tired of your spouse no matter what.

There are several things that got you attracted to each other, so when it seems you are getting tired of the same person just try and go back to memory lane and think about how you started, the good experiences you have shared together and ruminate on what the problem might be then adjustments so as to figure out what can be done to return you to your old self that couldn't do without him/her.

Getting tired of your spouse can lead to so many things which battery happens to be one. Tolerance is very necessary and compulsory to move a marriage/relationship to a higher level.

4. Endurance:

When we talk about love, wealth is needed to strengthen/sustain it, but love supersedes all which the Bible also affirms.

Love endures and for that, happiness should be built on nothing else than love.

Change is very essential in humans existence so, the wealth may not be stable, hard times will definitely come but with endurance the key to successful marriage/relationship is guaranteed, remember no matter how cloudy it may be there will always be a silver linen.

Enjoy together and also suffer together with joy.

5. Fidelity:

Fidelity is the act of being faithful to one's spouse or sexual partner. It is important to note that striving to be faithful to one's spouse is the beginning of of happiness in any marriage/relationship. It might not be easy to be faithful to a single person for along time but it is very important to try all best possible to be faithful to him/her.

It is important for a man to know that if his wife/fiancee is not happy to due to his infidelity or something else then things cannot move well, and the biggest thing that makes a woman happy is to have faith in her man that he is the only man for her and no one else.

6. Be proud of him/her always:

No matter the condition that may arise be proud of your man/woman. Being proud of one's spouse breeds happiness among the two and it also raise up the level of confidence among them.

7. Never reveal sensitive information:

The sensitive affairs of your marriage must always be padlocked that no one else could hear (not even a close friend).

When i say sensitive information, it includes the negative(s) and sexual affairs with your spouse, never reveal it to anyone.

When you mistakenly open it to someone else then your marriage/relationship is exposed to danger, remember human being can do anything to get whatever they want, the sexual difficulties you have may be the solution to a friend's problem or someone close to the person you reveal the secret to which the person you told might also tell.

Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2015/02/7-criteria-for-successful-marriage-or.html

ennyhola:
He is almost 60 but he is very intelligent...well...we the children are working on keeping them.together..he is always thinking

he is bound to think, i guess you the children must work hard for success, you are all he needs roght now.

Danty37:
bro thank God that your dad and mum are still alive...
The then National bank of nigeria, that where my dad work as a manager before the bank was sold out... Things became so tough for dad and mum that even mum couldn't bear it but to travel to the land of no return.. Dad also had no choice but to follow suit... But to God be all the Glory, we are four in numbers, dad built his own house before he went, elder bro built his own and also a graduate, i'm also a serving corp member, younger sis is in her finals... God has been great bro... Just thank God... We all attended a reputable fed uni and state uni in Nigeria...
"when there is life, there is hope"... Shalom..

, true, there is hope when the life is filled with breath.

ennyhola:
I hope Ogun state water corporation will recall my Daddy...it's been 10years since dad was wrongfully dismissed from Work with 20others...
_
I was affected so much...and I hated the government so much
And the GM then so much...Mrs Olaide of water corporation.
.
My Daddy was dismissed harshly..
Unexpectedly... without warning
_
Strange to us when we met the hardworking man home when we got back from school ten years
_
So hardworking
Worked tirelessly for the government from 7-6pm (go for supervision again)
Transfered from one LG to another almost yearly and he will go diligently just from the government


But the maN GOT TO THE OFFICE one Morning AND MET A WHITE ENVELOPE! (that was the End)
Senior technical Officer OGSW

he was dismissed at a moment' he couldn't be looking for job again
He was dismissed at the very top with little entitlement and little savings (Family man & Relative man)





It's been God and my Mum
But till now DAD still interprets any little mistake my mum do as an act of her disrespecting him because he is jobless!

I'm always pained
And I hated GBENGA DANIEL the then GOVERNOR and MRS OLAJIDE the then GM for repaying my Father diligence with Dismissal


(first time of Sharing this to the world ... because I look perfect..but NAY ...thanks Nairaland..we all can share what we're facing without anybody looking down on us)

He shouldn't lose hope, doors of favour can still be opened for him one day. Most men term any error by women as been disrespectful in such situation, this is why women should be extra careful when they are untop. Please tell him to keep stromg Like he has been thus far.

No marriage is completely out of temptations and turns, different homes with different issues, but there are some tips you must know to overcome those trouble moments.

1. Be ready to forgive:

In a marriage/relationship its important to be ready to forgive. Forgiveness is an integral part of marriage which must not be taken with levity. The fact that we are humans makes us imperfect, so sin/misunderstanding is bound to occur.

Offence/misunderstanding is a bridge a marriage/relationship must pass through to move to next level, failure to scale through successfully leads to destruction of any marriage/relationship, readiness to forgive prior to offence/misunderstanding will make any marriage/relationship stronger than expected.

2. Be ready to communicate:

As i have said in one of my posts that communication is very essential when it comes to marriage/courtship, without proper communication wrongs can never be rewritten.

Through communication solution emerge which will solve the crisis at hand. If any among the two parties involved is not willing to communicate, one should put the other in the mood of communication for the relationship to be rebuilt.

Without communications errors might not be known, and communication ensures that the two parties reach a suitable agreement which will make them not to make the same mistake again.

3. Be ready to make the first move:

To rebuild a shaky marriage/relationship, one of the two parties must be ready to make the first move towards ensuring that the marriage/relationship is rebuilt before it becomes irreparable.

If it is still distance marriage/relationship first call can resolve the problem. Time must not be wasted or else something else may happen.

4. Be ready to accept your mistake:

One or the two parties must be ready to accept the mistake that led to the misunderstanding so that the problem will not linger more than required.

5. Be ready to say "i am sorry":

"I am sorry" is a very simple and sensitive statement which should always come out from the mouth of a couple or the two involved in a courtship to ending a crisis.

It is a sign of showing remorse for an offence committed, it shows your spouse you have accepted your shortcomings, it also implies you are willing to change, it also gives your spouse a feeling of you subduing yourself to his/her control which is capable of resolving any issue whatsoever in your marriage/relationship.

6. Be ready to surprise :

It is necessary to surprise him/her in order to end the misunderstanding completely. You know what he/she loves, and you also know what you can also do to make him extremely surprise and happy, why not do/by it. This single point can even singlehandedly restore the happiness in your marriage.

Click link to start reading... http://www.bamisepeters..com/2015/02/6-tips-to-rebuild-collapsing.html

We shouldn't get this twisted, there are large differences between wife and girlfriend which i will talk on in this post.

1. A wife is in love with you while a girlfriend has someone else she loves

Of course she will not be a wife without the deep feeling of affection. A girlfriend don't need to even love you before you start the affair with her.

2. Wife is about the future while girlfriend is for the present

A wife plans the future with you, she wants you to be rich and successful not just for your benefit but for her and the children too.

You are successful or not is not the business of the girlfriend so far you have fulfilled her need.

3. Wife is a life partner while a girlfriend is a contract staff

A wife is not just someone you will enjoy now and run from, it is a life contract you have signed with her.

Meanwhile, a girlfriend is a pleasure partner for specific period of time.

4. Girlfriend will not tell you all about her but a wife will do

For the fact that she is not your life partner she is even allowed to hide some secrets about her from you.

A wife will never hide from you no matter how embarrassing it may be as she knows the importance of trust and the effect of hiding secrets in a relationship.

5. Wife is always considerable while a girlfriend is often less concerned

The fact is that if you cannot give her what she want you cannot even try to move close to her.

A wife is ready to accept any condition you are as she knows no condition is permanent. She believes so much in your dreams.

6. A wife plan your future with you but a girlfriend only enjoy the moment with you.

A wife will always be focused on a great future with you. She plans about the children, your career, cars, your house and all other things a man must have to be able to compete with his peers in the society.

Girlfriend only want to collect what you have to fulfil other needs which might even include making the life of her real lover better.

7. A wife even help the ministry of the girlfriend

After all said and done, a wife plans the success of the man with him which after all the plans comes to play the girlfriend feeds on it because without the success the girlfriend cannot get what she want.

This is because in most cases girlfriend wants the money. Even the one that claims it is for sexual pleasure will feast on you when you have the cash on less she is collecting from somewhere else.

This is my view of the issue, please add comment and review, it is important to me.


Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2017/06/7-differences-between-wife-and.html

Hasty generalization has eaten deep into the system of many ladies/women.

Because a man cheated on you then you conclude that all men cheats.
Have you tried all the men in the world before you reach that hasty conclusion?

FOR THE SINGLES

You claim all men cheats, yet, you yourself you go from one man to another to satisfy your material needs, have you forgotten that whatsoever you sow you shall reap?

You claim all men cheats, yet it is the most handsome man on earth you are looking for when there are good looking guys/men who are humble and well cultured.

You claim all men cheats, yet, it is people like Dangote or Zuckerberg you want as your lover when your parents are stark illiterate, that your whole family feeds on less than #500 in a day.

Even some ladies from rich background do make the mistake of aiming for a rich guy by all means.

Don't forget that as you are aiming for that kind of man many ladies too are dying to have the man of your dream to themselves too and they can go any length to get what they want from him.

So, don't blame him if he falls prey. What is good isn't meant for just a person.

Well, nobody is saying it is not good to aim high, it works well for some woman while it doesn't for some other women, but why not climb the three from the bottom.

THE MARRIED

Yes, we have some married men who still chase after thin legged girls but that doesn't implies that all men cheat.

Even those married men that are cheating, you need to ask yourself what you are doing wrong that is making him to pursue every other things in skirt before you conclude.

Though it is innate for some men who cheats, but some other women are behind their man's promiscuity.

At times, you and the man may not be compatible right from day 1, but love at times is funny and can make you take wrong decisions which you might not recover from for life.

You claim you don't want your man to go out yet you don't give him his food at the right time or you don't even know how to give him quality food cooked by you.

Well, many tiny legged girls are trained to spoil men with quality foods cooked by them and not mama put or tantalizer.

You claim your husband cheats, yet, when he call on you to fulfil his manly duty you are always tired or not in mood while he is sweating profusely right from the bottom.

You claim your man cheats, yet you don't respect and treat him like a king while he is proud of you not minding your shortcomings.

Some ladies are thought how to cuddle a man and make him feel untop of the world, they even went extra miles to develop the skill.

There are uncountable men who will never cheat on their women, but before you can get them you yourself must be part of the uncountable women that one can boldly call wife material without any doubt whatsoever.

As there are non cheating men there are also completely responsible women who can go any length to satisfy their man with anything in this world.

You will only find men that cheats when you aim higher than what you deserves or what your destiny wants.

There are so many homes that when you go to enquire about the man the wife will confirm to you that her man is completely free from cheat.

What will you say about such cases? Oh! You will still claim that the man is cheating without the woman's knowledge.

Good for you, keep dreaming, what you think is what you get.
Do you know that some men find it irritating sleeping with another woman outside the one they claim to love/their matrimonial wife?

If you have tested cucumber and you don't like it don't conclude that fruits is not good for the body.

If you have not come across a man that doesn't cheat then you need to check yourself too.

The more you live the more you learn.

Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2015/08/in-case-you-don-know-not-all-men-cheat.html

I can't say about other people, but for me, i cannot continue with the feelings when i approach a girl, confess my feelings and she says she is in a relationship already.

Personally, i feel if you tried the first time, the second time and possibly you try the third time, yet, she claims to be in a relationship, you do not need to continue as she is really serious about what she is saying.

Now-a-days, it is very rare to see a single girl as most of them start relationship as early as you cannot imaging since guys are trying to catch them young.

There are so many things i just think about when i was still hunting, how will i tell her to leave the person she is with now? This means i need to do more than extra to convince her i am better.

Another thing is that how am i sure if after all she now ignores the other guy for me that she will not also leave me for someone else who proves to be better than me?

Also, how will i feel if a guy comes from no where and start saying all sorts of sweet words to my own lady? Remember we become enemies with any opposite sex who comes the way of our girl especially when we know he is interested in her.

At times i know some guys that stays and keep professing their love for a girl who claims to be with another man already, thinking the relationship may be complicated whereby the girl can decide to excuse herself from the relationship for him.

The truth is that if a girl loves you truly she will let you know what you need to do to have her. If she is in a relationship, a serious one for that matter, she will not hide it from you.

She will lay emphasis on it and let you know there is no vacancy whatsoever with all seriousness.

If there is a slight opportunity she will expose it to you stylishly.

You will always know if you can still have her or not.

Some men are so bold and so courageous that even when she says no space they try all their best to make hole out of nothing and end up becoming the automated teller machine for the girl who has made up her mind to collect the little he think he has that is giving him the courage to keep disturbing her.

Before you continue to disturb her after she said she is in a relationship think about it, if you were the one in the shoes of the guy she is in a relationship with, can you accept it, if yes, you can then proceed, however, expect yours in the nearest future. It will come like a tsunami i can promise that.

There are plenty good girls, why not take your mind away from the girl that says she is as already in a relationship and channel the strength on someone who is willing to accept just your hand let alone your body.

Please there are many meaningful fishes in the ocean, go fishing and let your hook get you your better-half.

Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2017/06/erase-feelings-completely-if-you-love.html

At the beginning of any relationship it is very essential to keep it secret as much as you can.

The following are reasons it is essential to keep it secret:

1. Because it is the beginning:

At this point you have not really known where it will lead to, you are just beginning to know each other and trying to see the prospect of marriage out of the relationship.

2. You will be hanged:

The moment you start making people know about your relationship you have made them to start looking up to you, your freedom will be limited.

And for the fact that you know that they are already watching you it will be hard to make the decision to break-up if you feel it is not working out or it will not work out well in the future as you will start considering people's thought about you as regards your relationship.

At times when you move with an opposite sex they start grumbling even if that opposite gender is your sibling, you start seeing secret agents watching over you for your new lover which makes you totally stalked.

3. Some will want it destroyed

This for those who have been in one relationship or another prior to the new one.

You think your ex is through with you? Sorry!

The only way out is to have ended the relationship maturely and with mutual understanding, if it is the case of infidelity or something else, that ex will want the separation between you and the new found lover so as to prove his/her point that led to the separation between you and him/her.

Some will go extra mile to cause the separation themselves through any means including attacking you on your social platforms where the new found lover can quickly come across it.

In case your ex is the extreme jealous type, you are in deep shit if you make them know your relationship at the early stage, you know what jealousy can cause at times.

When you leave them in the dark they will remain clueless and will have moved on when you later need to make it open.

So, it is highly recommended that you make your relationship hidden from people till you are sure of the status and stand of the relationship to avoid those spiritual binoculars that is watching your destiny.

This is my opinion, please add comment and review, it is important to me

Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2017/06/3-reasons-you-need-to-keep-your.html

So many times people's pasts have come back to hurt them especially when relationship is involved. Some try all they can to hide the past thinking it might not go well with their new found lover.

Today i am putting it straight to you that it is suicidal to hide your past from someone you love who is also returning the love to you.

Here are some reasons why you need to open up the past to your lover:

1. To know you completely

When we talk of relationship, you and your partner needs to know each other back and front.

What is the essence of introduction and the talk without your real identity? The past is your real identity which your partner must know.

Your lover is your defender, your confidant, your closest counselor and all, without knowing your past how will they know what to do in case the secret comes back to roar its ugly face?

2. Because you are loved

One of the ways to be grateful to someone who loves you is to deem them fit to know your past.

No matter how strange your past may be, when you let them know, it makes them know the true nature of you.

This is when they really know what they want to enter into and know how to deal with you.

3. Because you are in love

This is different from the above as you are the one who is in love with the other person, hence, you need to make them completely part and passel of you by revealing your true identity.

When you love people you are so free to disclose anything to them, you are comfortable with them.

If you still hide it from them it means you don't love that person.

4. To secure your future

From the beginning of the relationship is when you really need to disclose whatever secret to the new found lover.

In relationship, your past will always come back to your face and if you did not let the lover know, you have destroyed the beautiful moments.

It will be so disastrous if they later find out from external body as they will feel betrayed and their decision might shock you.

5. Because that is the definition of relationship

This is the last point. You really need to let your lover know the whole of your past because this is what relationship is all about.

When you let your lover know your identity, they will know either to stay or to leave.

Before you tell them you don't need to be afraid if they will stay or not because someone who really loves you will stay no matter what your past speaks.

Like i said earlier, keeping your secret from your lover can determine the duration of the union.

Relationship is for two people who are ready to accept their pasts and work together as one for a superb future.

You might be able to hide your past when it comes to other issues, but in relationship this is not applicable because it deals with emotion.

Something you considered to be minor can become huge in future and it is capable of destroying whatever bond binding you and your lover.

To be on a safer side, it is good to know your fate early by disclosing your past at the beginning of the relationship so that your past will not ruin the beautiful future the time you are enjoying it already when it roars it ugly head.

Remember, it is very good for that lover to withdraw the love for you when the feeling is still fresh than when you are deep in the relationship, especially when you have done so many things together or when you have sacrificed things for each other.

Don't allow the past ruin your future.

Please add your comment and review, it is my opinion and your review and comments is important to me.


Source: http://www.bamisepeters..com/2017/06/5-reasons-your-lover-must-know-about.html

Anger is something that is part of human existence.

So many things and so many people can get you annoyed but you need to learn to control your reaction towards the annoyance.

As i earlier said that anger is part of life, it is one of those things that makes human to be human.

In fact, every man posses the trait of anger even a child.

At a point in time, once spouse might get one angry but it is a must one learn not to over react so as not to make the situation worsen.

You shouldn't expect that someone you love, someone you cherish, someone that all your life evolve around will not get you angry.

In such case, all you need to do is to just keep calm as your annoyance may even cause you to say what you shouldn't have said to your spouse or partner.

When you are angry your system will not recognise anyone especially if the cause of the anger is from the one you love.

The best thing to do when you are angry is to think about your good times with your spouse. This will make you overcome the anger if the person that caused the anger is not helping you to get over it either by begging, petting or any other way.

Also, you must learn to give your spouse some breathing space when he/she is angry.

We are humans, we are meant to be angry at one point or the other. If you try all your best possible to ease him/her of the anger and all is proving abortive, just try giving them little time to be alone.

At times, when you are trying to make him or her get over the anger it just get aggravated which may lead to an unwanted reaction.

There are some people that are naturally prone to anger and can do anything strange when they are angry. Once you know that your spouse falls in that category, just make sure you leave them to themselves once they are angry.

This kind of people, there is nothing you can do to ease them of the anger, it will just be like adding petrol to fire.

This kind of people will calm down when the time is due. In fact, they will feel ease with your disappearance which will make them calm down. They will come to you themselves after they might have regained peace within themselves.

Learn to know your partner more when he/she is angry so as to know your reaction towards making them feel ease especially during their negative mood.

Learn to know what makes him/her get angry and try as best as possible not to get him/her angry through them.

Learn not to over react when you are angry if you cherish your relationship /home so as not to make your relationship short-lived, as it has caused death in some homes and unnecessary divorce in some other homes too.

Source: http://bamisepeters..com.ng/2015/09/anger-can-ruin-your-relationship.html

Cheating has become part of human recent times and to some people it is something they cannot do without when other feels they have done something really bad and unforgivable.

With my experience so far i have seen different kinds of cheats which i will explain in this post.

1. The chronic cheat:

This kind of people don't even feel sad when they cheat because they have turned cheating to duty and obligation.

Not that they don't get what they want from their spouse but that is what they have made themselves to be which has been their usual way of life since time immemorial.

They can't feel any how as they have lost their conscience long time ago, they cannot even cope without cheating, to them it is a sin not to cheat.

For this people, their spouse knows they are cheating but they just need to keep their calm and watch as the movie unfolds, they are indifferent about it as they are independent in case anything happens.

People in this group are mostly men.

2. Occasional cheat:

These are the type of people closely related to the first group. They feel it is not normal to always eat a particular kind of food always.

They feel the spouse is for life and the home, so, they also need to roll along with life.

For the fact that people that belongs here do all they can to make sure that their spouse didn't catch them says it all.

They are also being conscious as they don't want to lose their partner and thereby destroying their union, this is why they make sure the road is all cleared with proper planning.

After they are through they make sure they don't leave any hole for lizard to walk through.

For the people under this group, they pretend to be loyal when they are at home but they have other hidden intentions within.

They perform those magic outside with their whoever and pretend to be a good and loving husband/wife inside.

3. Conditional cheat:

This kind of people are those who cheat because of the situation they find them self.

It might be that they are going through tough time with their spouse and out of consciousness they find themselves lying in the bed with an opposite gender.
This is common among bad drinkers who feels the best place to have a quite time is the bar and they get themselves drunk and into trouble.

Some who also falls under this group are those ones trapped.

They claim to go for a meeting and at the end of it all they lodge them in an hotel with "a gift"(you understand). This is what this kind of people get as a result of keeping company with those chronic cheats.

But this is one truth, either you are a chronic cheat, occasional cheat or conditional cheat the fact remains that you are a cheat and no other name.

On a lighter note, which group do you belong?


Source: http://bamisepeters..com/2017/06/3-major-kinds-of-cheat-which-do-you.html

ojun50:
who be we men
young man speak for yr self

ok sir!

modelmike7, ojun50 the two of you don't want to agree we men do it more because you are the subject, well done!

This is my personal opinion and i think i am free to make it public, i wouldn't mind a criticism this time, in fact, let us make this interactive.

Personally, i think men cheat the most, out of 10 cases of cheating, 7 of them will be from men and i know we all know that is true.

Most women are satisfied with their man and for the fact that women are seen as a prostitute when they are seen with another man makes them so trapped.

Pregnancy is also one thing that can kill a woman if it is not gotten through the proper channel, it doesn't speak well that you are in your matrimonial home and you go out of it to come back with pregnancy.

Men don't get pregnant which makes them do however they like, there is no meter to count the number of women they have slept with.

Though, women are smart too, you can think the access is very intact meanwhile they have done a lot, but they still feel caged more than men.

Read Also: SIDE CHICK IS NOT JUST A DISTRACTION BUT A DESTRUCTION

Most women cannot cope with the fact that they will be asked to leave their matrimonial home after being caught as it is not a standard for leaving.

It is a disgrace to them unlike men who are often the owner of the house who after the deed is done will say deep down or even out that if you cannot cope you can leave the house.

So, either the lady is at fault or even if it is the man that is at fault the woman is often the grass.

So, men are the usual culprit, and this is why i always prefer a woman to be independent financially in case the man get himself trapped or something else happens to him on his sexual adventure.

Please this should be interactive, feel free to share your opinion, it means a lot to me.

Source: http://bamisepeters..com/2017/06/in-relationship-who-cheat-more-man-or.html

Personally, i think a man being a ladies' man doesn't make him a good or a bad prospect for a relationship.

Quite number of times we have seen men who are not even attractive to many ladies being a bad prospect for relationship, not because of their look or anything but by what they have done in the relationships they have gone into.

Many ladies are always afraid of the fact that ladies' man can easily be distracted by the opposite sex which isn't a good one for them and their relationship with the guy.

Being a ladies' man isn't the problem but the man himself. It all depends on how good he is able to control himself when women are involved.

There are so many ladies' men that have been so faithful to their woman despite the fact that they have many pretty ladies that flocks around them.

Not that they are not coming for him or not asking him to be romantically associated with them but he has the right word for every situation.

If he is determined and able to concentrate even in the point of distraction i don't see him falling for woman that flocks around him day-in day-out.

It is not a matter of him being a ladies' man that will determine the prospect of relationship with him but he himself will determine his prospect in relationship either good or bad through his actions, reactions and rigorous determination as it will not be easy to resist the temptation.


Source: http://bamisepeters..com.ng/2017/06/he-is-ladies-doesn-make-him-bad.html

This has left many in shock as to the reason some ladies prefer the bad guy to the good ones. They want the rich, outspoken, rugged, fashionable and attractive guy at the expense of the cool and gentle guy.

I don't blame their choice at times as appearance cannot determine the attribute of any human being.

No one prays to be poor though, however, it pays to follow someone responsible and humble.

Here are some reasons they prefer that rugged, outspoken, fashionable, etc. guy;

1. They want to be proud to show him off

Most women love to show off. So far he is good looking and with great outfits almost all the times they will be quick to accept his offer because he is presentable and have all they desire.

They also answer this type of guys so fast as they know they don't waste time on ladies as they move on so fast, it will be a lose for them if they take more than expected time.

2. They want a bold man and a comedian

Most ladies hate to be in a boring relationship, hence, they prefer to bounce with the outspoken guy so as to always relief them of tension.

They want him to be bold and free to confront them right from the start.

READ ALSO: 6 WAYS TO DETECT AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP EARLY

If a man lack a bit of fear when asking you out, you really need to be careful as they have other intentions and most of the guys that are not afraid whatsoever to confront any woman are those with the cash as they believe that money is what any woman desires.

3. They want to get anything they want at the time of their need.

One truth is that some women loves an already made man, someone who has gotten the cash, therefore, they don't think twice when accepting the love proposal from the guy.

They want to own the best fashion outfit and free to enter eatery especially with their friends.

4. They want authority

They know he is rich and they know riches command respect and attention. They want to be the object of that respect and attention not minding the source of the wealth and their future.

They are never interested in the characters of the guy, to them, so far he has that money and it shows in every part of his attitude they are fine.

After a long period when they start seeing the real attitude of the guy they start crying for help.

This is not to say the rich guys don't deserve to be loved, there are even responsible and reserved ones among them, but a bad guy deserves a bad lady and vice versa.

Please add comment and review, it is important to me.

Source: http://bamisepeters..com.ng/2017/06/reasons-ladies-prefer-bad-guys-to-good.html

I don't think the issue should be if a woman can love a man. The issue is if a woman can confront a man to confess her love for him which i have already answered in this post "6 ways to make a guy fall in love with you".

A woman can love a man too as they also have feelings or should i say emotion. They even make use of the emotion more than men, this is one thing that makes men stronger than them, if this is the case, then they should even fall in love more than men.

If you really notice, women break down faster and longer than men after a break-up, getting over the breakup is another complete issue that will seems to be an herculean task for them as a man will dust it off as fast as possible.

Though, it is a general belief that men should be the one to ask a lady out just for the man to give the lady the dew respect, if not, men will not be able to compete with women when it comes to asking a lover out.

There is no law that stops women from falling in love with a man. The legal rights and freedoms the men share are the same as that of women, and there is non that binds them from displaying their affection.

Why i will just not advise a woman to show her love first to a man is because of the way men behaves to such woman.

Many men take such advance less serious, and also take such women for granted and as someone less serious. If they eventually start a relationship they make the woman go through hell, thereby, showing to her how wrong it is to show their emotional intentions to the man they desire.

Men believes it is their own obligation to express their romantic affection first as it signifies superiority.

This makes many women to draw back even when they love a man, thereby denying so many women of their choice of man.

This also limit many women to force themselves to love any man that knocks the door of their heart, this is why it takes time for many to think about it as they need to grow the love.

Please add your comment and feedback, it is important to me.

Source: http://bamisepeters..com.ng/2017/05/reasons-why-women-can-also-be-first-to.html

Finding a lasting love is something that is as expensive as gold this days. This is one reason some people are afraid to go into relationship.

You can actually find love that will last, but for that to come to reality i will suggest the followings:

1. Be positive

One reality about life is that everything is not certain, not even our life as we might just sleep and not wake up to see the break of another day.

For this, you must just think positive as at times what we think happens in reality.

Forget the fact that many since they have grown to starting a relationship they have not gotten a befitting partner, your case might be different and this is why you must be positive as your mindset can even keep giving you a set back if not properly monitored.

2. Be trustful:

It is common among humans, we don't trust easily, however, if you are the type looking for someone to love you, you need to be ready to trust the partner as that is the foundation of any relationship whatsoever.

Remember you will have to submit your ego, and all of you to him/her, without trust this cannot be possible.

You don't need to border your mind about if the partner will betray your trust or not, the fact is that you must do your part.

3. Be perfect:

This is what i mean here, for you to start a relationship you need to make yourself perfect to yourself. You need to always ask if your behaviour is what you can accept from others.

The truth is that what you cannot tolerate you shouldn't try it with your partner, this is why you must be perfect for yourself, be sure that whatever action you take can be generalized.

If you always have it at the back of your mind that you want this relationship to work and that even if it doesn't work you will not be the subject but the victim, the testimony at the end of the day will be so great as you are ready to face any temptation that comes the way of your relationship.

READ ALSO: YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE THESE BIZARRE TRUTHS BEHIND CRUSH

4. Be modifiable:

Remember you want to fall in love with someone completely different from you in all ramifications. There are things you cannot accept, there are things you love and there are also things you cannot touch let alone eat.

You must try to make yourself available for modification because you will need to blend with some of the choice of your partner.

5. Learn to be tolerant:

The truth is this, your partner might possess some attributes you will find irritating, you don't need to show it but accept it as the price you need to pay for the love even if you will correct the act.

Even if you must correct immediately, you must do that with all diligence so as not to create wrong impression in your partner.

6. Learn to forgive:

I know this is not easy to deal with as it depends on the gravity off the offence. But, in a relationship you must be ready to forgive because no one is perfect as the flesh can be so deceitful and always hungry to commit one atrocity or the other.

Always ready to give another chance because it might be the other way round tomorrow, don't let your action today be used against you but for you in the future.

This is my opinion on finding a love that last, i hope it helps.

Please add your comment and review, it is important to me.

Source: http://bamisepeters..com/2017/05/5-ways-to-find-love-that-last.html

This is different from other topics today and it is directed to many that are depressed after noticing that the person they claim to love don't feel the same way towards them.

This mostly happens to the ladies as they don't have the boldness to profess their feelings to the man they have romantic feelings for. It is not even the matter of boldness, it is not advisable as many men take such girl for granted.

Not that it doesn't happen to the guys too, but most times the guys move on so fast than the female gender maybe because they know there are many better fishes in the ocean.

You just have to let the feelings die in you, i do really know how it feels as i was once a victim, but seriously i am happy it didn't happen the way i thought it will be.

The truth is that being with that person cannot guarantee your success and being without them doesn't mean you will die or something.

READ ALSO: CAN YOU BUY SANITARY PAD FOR YOUR WOMAN?

This will teach you how to control your feelings, just in the hard way because you can't just help it but you just have to let it go. It is better not to force it as regret will be the order of the day. The feeling of love is best enjoyed when it comes natural.

I heard some go beyond the natural to force the feeling and i know this will not even change some people from forcing it. Well, those that forced it are still regretting their actions while the disastrous result is still awaiting those who wish to do the unusual to force the other person to reciprocate the feeling.

It is so good to accept your fate when it isn't working with the other person after several trials when it is natural and move on as fast as possible so that you will not lose that person destined for you while chasing the wind.

Please add your comment, it is important to me.

Source: http://bamisepeters..com.ng/2017/05/this-is-what-you-can-do-when-you-love.html