₦airaland Forum

ZACHIE: Naughtier is appropriate
The mother makes the children. How she wants them to be is above all a reflection of how she was brought up.

Noted, tanks.
As per topic, all kids have a degree of stubboness born with dem. some are worse than other depending on how the parents handle them

i didnt know the best way to structure the subject jare , but i know wat i want to ask

pple often assume that kids living abroad are spoilt. e.g my mum came to visit and she kept complaining my kids are spoilt. so and so cant wash dishes, so n so cries too much etc. children at home dnt behave like this u need to be firmer.
then i went home to visit and met my sister's kids (they live wit my mum), oh dear lord, the 6yr old was rotten he wanted his way and he got it. he would scream the house down. disobey u and runoutside as if to say come and chase me. my mum kept saying " may God deliver dis boy o" i cudnt keep to my self i had to confront my mum. she said no mind am o, na devil dey manifest himself.

wats ur opinion or experience

its me o, i decide, i cook, i serve. my oga go always say anything and that pisses me off.

i no dey bother ask my batallion becos wetin dem want no dey market and i no ready make 5 diff meal each evening.

7842I: It will only happen if you allow it. Maybe you place your career before your hubby, or you have been so busy planning your getaway that you fail to notice you have become a stranger to him. You could just be the trouble maker......

I don't o, for now my career is looking after hubby and 4 kids under 10. ( going backbto work i sept wen baby is 3yrs old) u know wat things tend to spiral out of control wen dis incident happened, it shook our community, as in all our friends. Everyone started to think of something to do. I beg o my sister, make GOd look afte us all

armyofone: secured future for me is making sure I give my kids the best education.
sending them to mil academy for sure.


I will go with CC post here. Too much gra gra and we forget to live.

this funny secured future is the problem I see around. People forget to live, common vacation our pple will not go. Work all the time and will not take time to enjoy this beautiful plannet. To each its own.

my next destination is the Grand Canyon, i'm gonna use the money for the secured future there.

Ok o, there is time for everything, my no sane parent wud skimp on their kids education. It's not gra gra it's pension. My prayer is dat I never have to tax my kids for up keep wen am in my 60s. They will buy me stuff as the please but I will Neva open my mouth to say " pls son, can u help me wit some money, I can't pay my bill dis month" dat wud be my worst nightmare. I cud spend my noney on french lace gele or Cud invest it on bricks and mortar, I chose the later.

[quote author=eagle,eye][/quote]Lol, bros cool temper.

U know ur country, and humans are unpredictable. I don't think my hubby wud Eva knowingly do anything to hurt our family but sh.it happens. Dats. Fact! At the end of the day no be who get fowl get the egg wey e lay?

Ask ur friends and colleagues and u will hear horror stories like these. U know before d small wife go dey cause the big wife, not know o, the second go dey cook for oga and first wife giving her the utmost respect, then u will be the trouble maker. Some things I can't tolerate if dat happens to me I won't leave my oga o, I will move to my house and he can come around as much as he wants. But I can't stay under the same roof, it will kill me.

Look it up online I.e compare it wit pic of warts

[quote author=eagle,eye]My dear when will you ever feel COMFORTABLE TO TELL YOU HUSBAND ABOUT YOUR PRIVATE INVESTMENT?
Double standard exists in the world of Marriage. If your husband hides his investment from you, you will call him a wicked man who has ulterior motives, but if you hide your private investment from Hubby, you are only protecting yourself from the UNSEEN.

WOMEN[/quote][quote author

It's easy, I will wake up one morning and say honey u won't believe me my uncle said one of his friend's is selling their house becos he needs money for some family problems. It's only 2million, and I cud even use dat money I have in my savings before all this oyinbo pple thief am. Hahaha wetin u think? In 20 mins it's don. My hubby is not a petty person he will probably say can u afford it? My uncle say I can I pay twice, at least the money I spend on catalogue dress wud be going towards that. Dat will give me some focus etc.

Dats it. Am just waiting for our current project to be completed.

wit all the small small insult i get in this forum an addicted i cant stop.

moderator, dis is a serious matter o, oya front page nah

can i say dis is not about house, maybe little saving from ur salary or money hidden under ur mattress

carefreewannabe: What if you become three because your hubby decides to take in another wife?

I agree with you that education and happy upbringing for children is the most important thing. And I agree when you say that there is no sense in having several mansions. But I don't agree when you say "I'm not going to kill myself over something that hasn't happened and may never happen." It's not about killing oneself. It's about you as a woman being independent no matter what. Yes, you and your husband are one but you don't know tomorrow. So when husband and wife both work, it's no longer my husband's house as Nigerians like to say but OURS and he alone doesn't decide who is going to live with us. This was how the thread started. It was initially inspired by the story of a woman who couldn't handle a second wife.

i agree, with both points. i pray dis neva happens to any of us, it may sound like am a bad wife and dnt luv my hubby etc. dats far from the truth, yes i did buy a house, but its not a mansion it a 3 bed bungalow, i used my son as next of kin. if it all goes wonky at least i wont be homeless. if it goes well it hus a plus 1 to our properties. this is for my own peace of mind. i will tell hubby wen i fell comfortable to tell him.

if i wanted to retire and remain here dats fine,i know am covered wateva happen but i want to go back home wen my kids become adults.

as for the lady, we decided to call the hubby and ask him since they are friends of ours, the man is playing the victim. " ask ur friend if i drove her out, ask her if she was ever insulted by her junior wife, how can she leave her home for another woman" i was shocked he doesnt seem to realise how much he has hurt his woman.

davidylan: this is baffling. How does someone project their own experience unto millions of others? Funny how people manage to get across murtala mohammad airport then act as if they have never been near Africa in their lives.

i am not a stranger to nigeria, i was born there and only left becos i married someone who lived abroad.
we re just having a civilised debate.
things like this happen i have seen it with my two eyes. dont come and act likeam making things up or am trying to stir up trouble in pple's home.

jidegirl12: I don't know where to start sef

What bout doing everything in kids names? Ahh ha!

Anyways no need backstabbing anybody, just lay it out there what project you're embarking on, I don't have the time fighting over Mr&Mrs X title. All properties/ cert of inc ( both home & abroad) on kids names shikena!

And the living WILL is there to back it up incase of any monkey business

try telling a black man under 40 to write a will.

a little experiment for y'all, call ur hubby and tell him u want to have a separate investment in ur name only incase things dnt work out dnt forget to tell the result

i think the two name thing is ok if u live in developed countries, but in a society like nigeria how wud dat work.

say a couple build a house together, both names on, few year later there is trouble, in a society like nigeria who wud move out of the house?
ok lets say he get another woman pregnant, everyone will beg u, dnt let the woman destroy ur home, u r the wife we know. wen he goes to meet his maker, everything will be divided among the kids. in nigeria, culture and tradition rules the day.

its a scary thot, women shud be proactive about stuff like these. becos wen shove comes to push, those in-laws dat are calling u "our wife" will be the first to say wat did u bring to our brothers house.

well, may GOD forgive me, i have built a bungalow in my name. if it all goes wrong i will go there to spend my latter years. i still support my hubby in all things he does. but knowing i have that little hut in my state has made me very relaxed.

ok, this is something that has been causing trouble btw husband and wives especially in d diaspora. i will give u a quick story so u can understand my point.
a lady living in one european country decided with her hubby that it was time for them to build a home in nigeria somewhere they can live in wen they both return home finally. the plan was the man shud start doing business to nigeria and the woman wud work and send money down to 9ja. they man kept shuffling between europe and nija.

few years later the house was built, during the opening ceremony one lady kept dancing wit the woman and her husband, thinking shewas just a well wisher the wife was hugging the lady and dancing with her until someone called her to the side and told her that d lady was her husband's wife.

the man called his family to help him beg her saying he still loved her and wants her to accept the situation and take the younger wife as her sista.

each morning the new wife wud greet the first wife wit both knees "good morning mummy" on one occassion the first wife called the second wife and started to scream at her "wat kinh of respect are u resoecting me, at night u will jump on my hubby's pe.nis in the morning u will call me mummy. they had a big quarrel and the first wife left the house she is now back in the europe, in her late 50s trying to work as hard as possible to build a house that she would retire to in nigeria.

following this incident lot of women here have properties in their names, but some pple think dat is wrong. but in a country like nigeria can really depend on ur husband for security in ur old age

awwww, maybe she likes u too much, how about daddy same thing?

pls also check her for other signs of socialization difficulty. hun, am sure is nothing, but watchout for eye contact, and how she interacts wit her toys.

she will probably out grow it.

abi o, my sis life goes on

Hi all, I have 2million naira to buy land for investment, pls where will u advise. The plan is to build 4 or 6 flat on it that will earn between 350-500k per flat in rent.
I had this plan 2 yrs ago,, got someone to buy me a land but after investigations realised properties are renting for 180k per yr. this is optic estate area 5 near GZ company.
Any info appreciated.

My 6yr likes reading, he puts the tv on subtitles and reads it aloud. He keeps reading street signs etc. a few days ago he called me,
mum why is everything made in china? Hmmm, I don't know so I put it to u nairalanders. Why is everything made in china

Well, every body get their own style o. As for me, If u want it dat night, ur action during the day go tell me e.g, helping wit the kids and house chores then we go both go bed early but if u leave it all to me then I come upstairs ten o'clock and u set that dragon wait me, it's a Lie! E no go work

@Viking congrats, wat did u have? Hope the pains wasn't so bad. Next time hubby is looking to feed his dragon just remember
Wen baby's the head was about to pop out and u thot the thing go tear reach the other side

Either peep don't know wat am talking about or they not interested.
Thanks anyway

This is such a tragedy, sometimes busy body can get the better of us especially me am always in a hurry to get my kids in the car then I will scream while driving " guys seat belt on" without checking to make sure they ve done it

In 2007 my hubby and I were taking my mum to heathrow airport, we drove all the way from manchester to heathrow no probs, just before the airport we were stopped by police. They checked my kids car seats and started to query me because I put my son in the middle of the back seat. I argued that he was on a car seat, they said my mum shud have sat in the middle and the child on either side of her becos the seat belt has to ve a shoulder strap. Before they left one of the female officers said my kids were beautiful and she didnt want the be scooping their remains off the highway. That sent chills down my spine. Each time remember dat, I take the time to strap them on properly.

Rest in peace chizurum xx

, my son came back from school one day and asked me ". Why do brown pple (he meant black pple)hit their kids? wen white kids are naughty they only need to say sorry, but wen brown kids are naughty they get beaten even if they say sorry""

From then I thot to my sef, I go stop to beat this boy make he no go dey feel inferior but give am 3 days I no fit resist am o, we r back to normal

The question shud be at her age who wud want to be cleaning and cooking? Dat an spouse abuse. We shud all pray that God grants us our heart desire.

Wen am bored I just close my eyes an think of some of the things my kids say and before I know it am laughing loud
I once asked my 4yr old son, r u enjoying ur food? Yes mum, thank u very very much, u r a good cooker

Add urs, I will add more wen I get a few minutes to play

This is Good news, one of his advisers is on Ben tv. He describes some of the class rooms in his states as appalling. ''if u put animals in some of those class rooms in certain part of the world, u will be sued for animal cruelty'' they ve spent 216 million on scholarship.

Just want to get ur opinion on university rings, i know it's mainly done in America. Wud tis be a good idea in Nigeria? It cud also be produced on a necklace pendant. love to say more about it but my battery is running low.
Bottom line, is dis a HUD idea?? Wud add pics later

[quote author=dannysteve99@ya]We will not stop that man has to resign,he can,nt tell the public the website of were he work,it miss the Oga on top just put him there maybe because is his brother or friend.[/quote]

tyson99: How d man go dey feel now...chei

Ok, for those hoping to shame this man becos of wat he said, don't bother pple like this no get shame o, if u r thinking he will resign becos of all this propaganda, u r new to this country nothing go happen. Give it a few days and it will all be forgotten. As for me o,

my OGA at the top is involved

[quote author=dannysteve99@ya]We will not stop that man has to resign,he can,nt tell the public the website of were he work,it miss the Oga on top just put him there maybe because is his brother or friend.[/quote]

tyson99: How d man go dey feel now...chei

Ok, for those hoping to shame this man becos of wat he said, don't bother pple like this no get shame o, if u r thinking he will resign becos of all these propaganda, u r new to this country nothing go happen. Give it a few days and it will all be forgotten. As for me o,

my oga at the top is involved

Vikin: I have been taking care of my bothers kids when am around and I know how good I am with kids.

Now my turn to get my own kids, it's terrible for me.

Am in the 7 weeks now but I don't think I can cope with the sickness...fatigue, vomit, etc...i prefer to take care of them...but carrying them...OMG!

I called a friend and she told me I will survive it. My dear, sorry if am going off topic, I don't know if I will survive this oh!



Next time, I just go for adoption, this is killing me

awwww, bless ur heart. u will be fine. eating toast and crackers it helps alot. there are pple who r in worse condition. i got pregnant 2 years after marriage. i had a big wedding, hundreds of pple came and we were all jolly. afterwards i went to meet my hubby in uk. then i got preg and my eye sore pepper. i knew nobody, my hubby wud leave for work in the morning and the moment i wake i wud start to puke. there will be no one in the house, not even to say sorry or i beg give me water drink. i was angry hated my hubby for gettinh me preg( forgor i had a part to play in it hated my mum for not beinh here, hated my baby bby for causing me all this problem. long story cut short, then i had him, difficult birth but i had an epidural) he was worth all the trouble, he was so cute and had sideburns just like his dad i was so proud as they took me from labour ward to my room pple kept commenting waoh he is so cute, gorgeous, lovely etc. my love for him was just expanding i cudnt even sleep at night becos i feared he might not bethere wen i wake up. moral of the story is wen u have dat child, u will know dat he is worth more than 3yrs of morning sickness. i went on to do it 3 more times and now i have four, and i survived all the sickness lol