₦airaland Forum

Martinez39:
Any man in the US that gets married is a fool. Rationality forbids that any soul sympathises with him.

Martinez39:
Ubunja is a wise man. If you love your son, pray that your son becomes like ubunja & CAPSLOCKED

Fountainofyouth:
Going by this motion, let's say you're right, what of in this era where everyone, men and women, are allowed to vote, and most men, for example, most northern MEN, are always brainwashed to vote based on free stuffs and more promises cos they are emotional, without using their intellect and logical reasoning,

hopefulLandlord:
You asked for a logical counter so I'd bite


This started playing off on the wrong foot as you've generalised.

There are women that paint men bad. there are women that would conjur nonexistent misconducts, claim the father did it to their children then repeat it again and again from time to time till the child believes it. Do women like this exist? if your answer is yes then you have to admit your starting statement is wrong. OP didn't generalise. he spoke about such women alone.

Nobody is a saint. we all have our flaws and insecurities. we fall short in certain good qualities and excel in some bad ones. if the only way a man can fall short of being "deadbeat dad" is being perfect then you would be correct in labelling all father's deadbeat. I want to believe you're much lore intelligent than that

@bolded You shot yourself here Madam those "Other Times" is what OP is referring to and the bolded shows you didn't take your time to read and/or understand the OP before rushing to reply. an understandable mistake but a horrible one

I do not know if the first part is true but you seem not to know how brainwashing affects a child. there's a reason statistics show children usually take up the religion of their parents and die as one. Humans tend to build trust for certain people especially people who are close to them so a child who's mother keeps talking about how bad his father is would start believing it, if he believes it strongly enough then any act of benevolence from the father would be interpreted by such a child to be the father pretending to care. many Humans tend to believe first then search for evidence that fits those belief while discarding those that don't. This is how propaganda works on the human brain
https://www.wired.com/2017/02/dont-believe-lies-just-people-repeat/

http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20161026-how-liars-create-the-illusion-of-truth



There are instances where the woman makes it very hard/impossible for the man to bond with the child. take a look at this story by starboytwo www.nairaland.com/post/82020500


this again showed you didn't take your time to read OP


Starboytwo's story disagrees

JONNYSPUTE:
. I stopped taking most of the females here serious the day a video of a lady sucking the dick of a 6months old boy surfaced. Non of them commented on that thread until a female mod brought down the thread. Abeg forget these women with their hypocrisy and double standard.

JONNYSPUTE:
. Hahahahahahaaaaaah.These women won't kill us. My wife just called now and informed me that school is resuming tomorrow and that I should send her money for the tuition, I simply told her I ve transfered the money to the school already,she was like OK oooo. We need to step up our games bro.Before she starts telling the kids I'm a useless man,always travelling. Lol

LOL.. WHENEVER YOU'RE AROUND BUY THEM TOYS. PRETEND YOU ENJOY PLAYING IN SAND WITH THEM IF IT'LL MAKE THE KIDS HAPPY. BUY THEM THINGS. DON'T SEND THEIR MOM OH, ONCE SHE GETS THINGS FOR THEM WITH YOUR MONEY AND DIRECTIONS SHE CLAIMS TO BE THE PROVIDER.. AND SHE WILL EMPHASIZE ON HOW MUCH SHE SUFFERED TO BE ABLE TO RAISE MONEY TO BUY IT. WHERE AS YOU PAID FOR IT.

YOU MIGHT GIVE YOUR ALL TO YOUR FAMILY, BUT TOMORROW.. THE KIDS WON'T LIKE YOU BECAUSE THEIR MUM SPOKE HARSHLY ABOUT YOU AFTER A QUARREL ABOUT THE RANDOM MEN SHE SPENDS TIME CHATTING WITH ON FACEBOOK.

Regiomontanus:
Our forefathers knew about the emotional, egoistic, manipulative, deceptive and destructive power of women that's why they introduced the patriarchy. The patriarchy not only only put women in check but made society safe. Unfortunately, feminists, beta historians, Hollywood and the rest told us that our forefathers were misogynists.

The reason why women were not allowed to vote was because our forefathers knew that women are too emotional and could not make the sound logical decision especially when it didn't fit them. It was not that they hated women. Imagine if a socialist politician comes to Nigeria and gives women free stuff regularly and promises them more, who do you think women will vote for? Even if you try to explain why capitalism is better and why socialism is disastrous, they will not listen? The greatest mistake men made was to think that women are their equals intellectually and morally. Women can be moral and intelligent but not on the level of men.

Men are currently suffering from the plague called feminism. In the West, it's feminism and the gynocentric laws. This happened because men were brought up to put women on the pedestal and believe in the thing called "love". Men are worshipping women as women are manipulating the hell out of them.

Regiomontanus:
Never underestimate the power of brain washing. In addition, most mothers subtly make it known to kids that "it's either your father or me."

nams77:
Very apt. I have chatted several single moms and they all keep saying their Ex are oafs. The last one i was chatting with was also berating the Ex until i pressed harder and she opened up that the man is abroad and pays for the boy's tuition with out fail. He pays directly to the school.

My advice to men. Try and do financial transaction online. Pay school fees and other stuffs directly from your account. That way, there is evidence.

I remembered how a lady when online a while ago berating her Ex. She cried that the man doesn't even drop a dime or cater for the kids education. The man replied by posting carefully documented copies of school fees receipts

Regiomontanus:
So much effort dedicated to maintaining the false narrative that the great critical thinker, Martinez39, has shattered with his wonderful and remarkable topic. Such mothers will be exposed and there is nothing you can do about it. Not even the trash you wrote will amount to anything. Hush woman!

JONNYSPUTE:
If we are honest here,we would ve noticed that the op was very objective in his right up.He never generalized that all women are bad neither did he say that all men are good. I think the problem here is the lack of comprehension from some of us here. Listen to this.... ...Was hanging out with my closet pal one night and suddenly he started crying. I was confused, so I asked him why he was crying and he told me a story he had never told me before. ......He said that while growing up,he hated his dad so much because their mum made them believe their father was a very bad person. He told me that his father moved out from his own personal house to a rented apartment and stayed there till he died. All these while,himself and the other siblings believed what ever their mum told them and that made him never to check on the man until he died of hbp and stroke. He told me he is crying now because he started asking questions about his dad and what he found out was terrible.The whole thing the mum told them were all lies.

Beyfit:
Women are special being and they are protector, giver, lover and home keeper.

bukatyne:
No matter how you try to twist it, it is the responsibility of the father to ensure his children see him as he really is.

If all the children have to judge his persona is the feedback from their mother, he is still a failed father.

WOW. THIS MEANS THAT SINCE I WAS BORN, ALL THE FATHERS IN THE HISTORY OF FATHERHOOD ARE FAILED MEN.. BEING THAT IN ALMOST EVERY FAMILY THE CHILD IS CLOSER TO THE MOTHER THAN THE DAD.

IT'S NOT BECAUSE WOMEN ARE LOVELY WHILE MEN ARE HARSH.
IT'S BECAUSE WOMEN AND CHILDREN ARE NOT TOO DIFFERENT. THEY OPERATE ALMOST AT THE SAME FREQUENCY SO IT'S NOT DIFFICULT FOR THE TWO TO GET ALONG. THEY ALSO REASON SIMILARLY.

MEN ARE FAILURES BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO BE AS BUSY AS POSSIBLE TO MAKE SURE THEIR FAMILIES ARE COMFORTABLE. LOL.

grom:
I discovered you lack both.. Brainwashed by your mother

EXPERTS OF MANIPULATION. MARTINEZ39

FIRST, RELIGION THRIVED THROUGH WARS AND FEAR. NOW IT THRIVES BECAUSE OF MOTHERS.

YOU'RE NOT RELIGIOUS BECAUSE OF COLONIZATION. YOU'RE RELIGIOUS AND SUPERSTITIOUS BECAUSE OF YOUR MOTHER.

A MOTHER IS NOT ALWAYS 100% CORRECT. QUESTION EVERYTHING SHE TELLS YOU EVEN WHEN CRYING OUT HER EYES.

fyneboi79:
Very good topic here. It took me more than 35 years to realize what my mother did to me concerning my dad. I hated and abandoned the man. Now all I can do to say sorry is to beautify his graveside.

addictiv:
OP has raised valid points, a lot of children have been fed lies about their fathers by their mothers, who did so out for selfish gains. The ultimate looser is the child who is deprived of a father figure.

ImaIma1:
I understand all this. My husband is away at work a lot and even travels. But the time he gets to spend with his daughter is very important to him. It's a joy to watch them. If I were to be the kind of wife that badmouths people, it will be hard to make her hate her dad. That's what I mean.

This kind of comment up here from you is why I say this thread is another female bashing thread.

Starboytwo:
Ok, heres my story...

I was in 300 level, when my dad died in 2016, yeah i was there when he died, I mean literally, I was the last person he saw before he went beyond... I still remember how the nurses urshered me out, then I went by the window, I saw him took his last breath, I saw the nurse covering his face... I already knew before my brother's who were outside...

I didn't cry, when my eldest bro burst into tears, I just looked away, but I didn't cry... Why cry I didn't know the man... Apart from a few holidays, some visits, a long boring, very awkward (now most cherished) road trip, where we left Lagos in his car to our Homeland, azin our village "gan gan".... This old man took me home... Damn... I still didn't grab I needed my certificate of origin, cuz I just got admission...

You know the drill, polygamous family, 4 wives, 11 children... We the last, last wife, me and my little brother... Blah blah, she left, took us along, was five, bro was 3... Didn't see my old man again... Till he appeared when I was in pry 5... Coupla holidays, blah blah, my little bro decided to stay and live with him... So 50/50... All his children had some piece of him, except me... mummy's boy, all through... So I grew up on mummy stories, few times I spent with him were always awkward at best... Mummy's side was home, all the people I knew and loved ...

Looking back now, I think he tried to know me, he asked many questions, he bought me soccer boots, met my coach blah blah, drove me to my school, on my first day as a jss1 students( they still rep me till date, my old classmates)...

He was old, sick, yet still drove me home, I thought it'd be a day but we we're on day4 when I got real sick, I already told my mom and she made him bring me back....

all those quality times I could have spent with him, enjoy my father, his company, his last days Let's just say I was not a very good company.....


Something happened last week in my family and after 3 years since he gone, I cried uncontrollable in the bathroom, I cried so much my eyes were swollen,my girlfriend asked what's wrong with my eyes, they we're red with sorrow, I finally understood everything, it all came together, all the pieces,finally I know and understood the kind of man my father was, I finally understood the sacrifices he made, how hard his choices were... He was a good man, and for the first time in my life on Monday, I missed my dad...

For a minute I hated my mother for denying me the opportunity to know this man, my very own father... My beloved father... Damn...

I want to apologise dad, for being so stupid all this while, for not figuring things out soon enough, for frustrating you when you tried to connect, I'm sorry PAPA.... I will never Forget the look in your eye, the first day I came at the hospital, it's the most purest form of happiness I have ever seen, he held on to me and would not let go, he recognizes me after so many years and spoke so many things with his eyes, that now I fully understood....


Damn, i miss you Pop.... I miss you so much... I wish I could have that road trip again... Damn

Rest in piece sir....

doitforyou:
So this post finally made front page.

The new replies since this post made front page are hilarious. Most guys that comment on the romance/family sections are very immature. They don't want or know how to handle opposing views, anybody with an "f" moniker with an opposing view is "dumb" "emotional" "thinking like a woman" an opposing "m" moniker is an "ass-licker" "weak man". These men shoot down alternative views/ideas in order to confirm and reinforce their existing myopic views. People that can't stick to topic because they don't have anything intelligent to add to the thread resort to sexist tropes to mask their deficiencies. An empty barrel makes the most noise.

Ironically, a moniker mentioned Quora, that's a very civilized forum where you seldom see people insult or attack a moniker simply because they disagree with their comment(s). I have also noticed people carry over beef they have with a moniker on previous threads to a new irrelevant thread. It seems to survive on NL you have to get in the gutter with these people, unfortunately I have been dragged down there sometimes. I have seen intelligent/insightful men and women leave these sections or don't post as often as they normally would.

I read this post almost immediately it went up and it was very one sided and it put ALL the blame on women, after he got 1 or 2 replies he went back and sanitized the post and then he added the little disclaimer on top. Anyone that isn't biased or misogynistic understood the post for what it was, even the sanitized version couldn't mask the sexist undertones. Why come to a public forum with diverse members if what you want is an echo chamber? If you think a woman's viewpoint is dumb and emotional, why not be confident enough to share your intelligent and rational viewpoint? Why hide behind offensive and derogatory words? Even if you want to use offensive words, why not use words that describe your OWN viewpoint. This section is now a joke, a cesspool of individuals that get their relevance on Nairaland.

nams77:
Very apt. I have chatted several single moms and they all keep saying their Ex are oafs. The last one i was chatting with was also berating the Ex until i pressed harder and she opened up that the man is abroad and pays for the boy's tuition with out fail. He pays directly to the school.

My advice to men. Try and do financial transaction online. Pay school fees and other stuffs directly from your account. That way, there is evidence.

I remembered how a lady when online a while ago berating her Ex. She cried that the man doesn't even drop a dime or cater for the kids education. The man replied by posting carefully documented copies of school fees receipts

Codes151:
see mumu! Justifying the usage of a federal vehicle to carry feeds for animal! It’s a patrol car for crying out loud. They should give that force some dignity.

Sub contract the task of feeding to a private or citizen who will do the work of feeding the fucking horses any means possible. Not with a police patrol truck!

Assuming, on his way, there is an emergency ? What does he do!? Means that team won’t turn up because the patrol truck was taken to get feeds for horses !


Illiterates

Codes151:
lol oh mehn! See mentality! Are your referring to department of cows?

You even had 36 likes from north!!

deltateam:
Learn and move on. Stop being an imp.

lecturer50:
I dont worry since i have seen enough insults and mockery since i was born.

deltateam:
This is the second time I am buying beans supplied by Hausa dealers.

I noticed that they pour Kerosene on the beans as it tastes of Kerosene.