₦airaland Forum

Spew a lotta d•o•p•e with no recourse to nobody.. Ma whacky nature I totally dig

I smell "Hints Magazine" here........... In btw; can I be ur friend also op?

Funny enough, managed to attract a lotta responses from tha female folk. Exhibiting their nous expectedly

kulyie: the word 'alledegedly' has caused so much controversies and quarells in this nairaland cant they just make a sentence without the word alledgedly journalist and alledgedly sha funny peeps







he murdered lonje he murdered,i dont know why they love 'alledgedly' with so much passion

Presumption of innocence............

A farmer buys several pigs, hoping to breed them for ham, bacon, etc. After several weeks, he notices that none of the pigs are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination.

The farmer doesn’t have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, he only asks the vet how he will know when the pigs are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will, instead, lay down and wallow in the mud when they are pregnant. The farmer hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the pigs himself.

So, he loads the pigs into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the pigs. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn’t take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, does each pig twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes to find the pigs still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the pigs and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.

The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the pigs. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the pigs are laying in the mud. “No,” she says, “They’re all in the truck and one of them’s honking the horn.

Guy goes into a bar. Big guy, but his head is the size of an orange. Goes up to the bartender, orders a beer. Bartender serves him and asks why a big guy like him has such a small head.

So the guy tells him his story:

He was walking along the beach when he stumbled upon a genie lantern. Out comes this beautiful, beautiful genie who says, “I’ll grant you one wish…but i won’t sleep with you.”

Guy says, “Ok then, how ’bout a little head?”

For real? both so don't measure up to Royco ladun

Are u crious? Those tins in front r 4 an 11yr old? Now i undstand wat diz senators r votin 4...

As in ehhhh........ Erratic and annoying

Chai, comot ur hand

U sure would need two bottles of Maltina and a tin of milk afterwards. Received one too many if I recollect

My gurly is so dead, gat enough to last me for a whole year.

FRDChickenisha: Famous PEJ Quotes



1. My Husband and Sambo is a good people

2. The President was once a Child and the Senators were once a Children

3. My Fellow Widows

4. A Good Mother takes care of his Children

5. The people sitting before you here were once a Children

6. Yes we are all happy for the effort,it is not easy to carry second in an international competition like this one – Addressing Press men after Female Under 19 Fifa World Cup

7. The Bombers who born them?wasn’t it not a woman? They were once a Children now a adult now they are bombing women and children making some children a widow

8. My Heart feels sorry for these Children who have become Widows by losing their Parents for one reason or another

9. We should have love for our fellow Nigerians irrespective of their NATIONALITY?

10. vote UMBLERRA and press your finger for UMBLERRA .

11. We all have HIV. Some Negative, some positive

12. I rather kill myself dan commit suicide

13. My Husband Is The Best Couple On Earth

11 gat me cracking dude

Kanye's reject tho...... Khalifa loves tha bald headed beauty silly

RedBenson: Are u guys high on some weeds here or sumfin? Wat's going on here?

Yours should make tha list also....... PINGLISH

More Brazilian hair for our ladies..... Yipee

I get to visit my uncle and his wife a lot. Before he got married, we were best pals and we did some pretty weird stuff back then, but things changed when he got married. The wife was amiable and comely at the beginning of the matrimony however things got a bit muddled up a year into the marriage. My visits which were sporadic once he got hooked up began to trouble the wife who took turns to make complaints about my timings to my uncle.
However, things got to a head last night when she dished out my food(I know someone's gonna say it has to be about the tummy, but hey, I'm a young virile male who needs all the meals he can get); knowing fully well ma displeasure of fish proceeded to serve one on my food while she gave her maid several pieces of meat to go with hers. I voiced my displeasure about this purported error to her but she didn't do a thing about it hence ma quandary.
Do you think it was an oversight on her part or is she ruffling my feathers with this acts of hers?
P.S My uncle notices but turns a blind eye to her excesses on most occasions

could I jez swap places and go from almost married to about meeting ma future MRs right?

Whooa.... So saddening; young dude, comical personality, great actor
R.I.P

Speedy recovery for him
*aside*....... Why not feed him more vegetables Could aid , mar or jez keep him in stasis

So apt..... "lowering the bar"; mami U hear?

Be careful who prints your wedding programme!
A printer was asked to put 1 John 4:18 on a wedding
programme but he made a mistake Instead he printed John
4:18.
1 John 4:18 says "there is no fear in love; but perfect love
casts out fear; because fear has torment. He that fears is not
made perfect in love"
John 4:18 reads, "For you have had five husbands, and he
whom you now have is not your husband..."

would I trust myself with her?

Lame causative argument; wouldn't be proudly Monday in Naija without this

High heeled Kukere dance... Waz alwys gonna be a recipe for disaster

;DMore Zonks from Imo, probably to discredit this man, or just maybe not

Chiq developed cold feet, can't say I blame her though....Worwor guys can be pretty difficult to handle