conscienceman4:
When you invite them to church when things are rosy, they will just laugh at you.
There's more to this physical life.

Yes oo. I had someone like that. He was living abroad. Whenever I would advise him to pray always, he would start chest beating - " No man can do anything to me, I don't believe in all these things. Etc". Nigerians don't value advice of someone whom they believe they are better than financially.
I really tried to reason with him but he wouldn't let me.
Last February, he collapsed and died. Nothing was wrong with him prior to that incident.
It was a shock to everyone. His autopsy was inconclusive.
He was a very good man but he was not involved in any spiritual exercise. I miss him a lot.
Women are better when it comes to looking for spiritual solutions to problems. Men will delay and beat their chest until it's almost too late. May God help us.

urbobo20:
This must be jamb money that was swallow by the python some years ago

Hahaha. You are very observant. I was about saying the same thing but you said it first.

So the snake came from Zimbabwe. This explains why the Nigerian security agencies were not able capture it all these while.

Prettychild:

This is one sided. She didn’t tell us the conversation that led to that question. He can’t just ask you that question from the blues

You are right. The story is not complete.
He didn't just walk up to the girl and asked her whether she was a virgin. Obviously it didn't happen that way.

On the surface, what the guy said sounds uncultured, but she should have told us what brought about the question. This will help us to have a better understanding of what transpired.

Men, please don't be too comfortable around women. Always create space between you and women. Women are very difficult to understand.

To be honest with you guys, I cannot comfortably say that I understand my wife.

tabaralph:

You are right on point., she was the one that called the cops on him to chase him away from their home , very common with naija ladies in Europe and America, the man has left this sinful world now, she will also die one day definitely, all the trash she wrote was just an eye service, she got what she wanted exactly, car keys, bank card etc…

You are right. She got what she wanted. The man can't tell his own side of the story cos he's dead.

She is now blaming the man's kins for his death. Seriously!

BoldBrainz:
So you people created a thread for rice ?

As in, RICE o?!

Someone woke up today and after considerate thoughts, decided to open nairaland and create a thread for rice!

And another retard woke up as a nairaland moderator, overlooking the litany of threads in various sections, decidedly nodded his coconut head in satisfaction that RICE deserved to be on the front page.

Okay. While we're at it, when are you clowns creating threads for sardines, garri, margarine, eggs, sausage and weed?

I don't understand you. Rice used to be one of the most common food among poor Nigerians. Now, a great number of Nigerians can't afford to buy rice. I believe that the topic is important.

lavylilly:
Local rice they were selling for between 10-15k per 50kg bag in 2017 skyrocketed to over 28k in 2019 & currently selling at 38-49k

Truth is, many Nigerians are not really angry about corruption and stealing of public funds, they're only angry that they're not the ones benefiting from the corruption.

You are right. Most Nigerians don't want a smooth running system where everyone will benefit. They complain because they don't gain from the rotten system.

talented321:
What are ur reasons that ur husband/wife should forgive u when caught cheating exacly'''
You travel from lagos to delta just because u want to cheat' u even branch for road by food shop belleful before u countinue the journey, after everything u blame devil, how? Your conscience no even worry u

Normally, cheaters don't ask for forgiveness unless they were caught pants down.

They would normally gaslight you if they think you don't have any hard evidence to support your case.

Most cheaters ask for forgiveness because they don't want to face the consequences of their actions, and not because they feel remorseful. They regret being caught but they don't feel remorseful.

The common consequences they are trying to avoid are shame and breakups.
When I say 'shame' ,I mean the shame that comes from telling friends and family members.

1Sharon:


Yes women do cheat. I'm not disputing that.

The thing is that you men cheat disgracefully and will end up embarrassing your wife.

I think we are saying the same thing. It will only amount to disgrace when the cheating is discovered, and men are caught most of the time.

I believe you though, men should pursue cheating with more grace. They are messing up the game a lot.

[quote author=GO0DHardDick post=124810974]

GO0DHardDick:


Dude it has been Scientifically proven that Women cheat far more than men but barely get caught. Dude a girl can be seeing you and at the same time be seeing 4 other guys and you'll never know about it.

Men are real and not pretenders, this is why it's easy to spot when a man is cheating. But you see Women? That's discussion for another day. Their cheating is mad gan! Dude she can be dating you and be knacking your friend, and all the boys in her area Must have penetrated her honeypot before And yet she'll still code like nothing happened. Women cheat far more than men

You are not far from the truth. Women are smart cheaters. Many women have cheated on their partners, and their partners will never find out. Men are not clever when it comes to cheating. Consequently, catching cheating men is very easy.
Another reason why women are not caught while cheating is because men traditionally think that women hardly cheat. With this mind set, men find it difficult to notice the signs associated with cheating women.
The truth is that many women here have cheated on their partners without being caught.

blessingnenye:
Why Is Cheating Considered Normal In Men? But For A Woman, Hell Will Let Loose?

Cheating is not considered normal for men. I don't know if I'm misunderstanding you.

OGHENAOGIE:
England are European champions and play good soccer.. last world cup lost narrowly to power house USA in semi finals...

They will lose narrowly to Nigeria. Thanks

ambassadorgozie:


Super falcons made the biggest mistake of their lives against Ireland. They would have won the game to avoid England. Very stupid of them to play defensively against Ireland.

Now, England will trash us. We're out already

Why are you afraid?

vannessa7:


Wisdom will make anyone ask him self or herself "do I want to be right or do I want to be happy". It will not cost Davido anything to apologize because when it comes to the Hausas they don't joke with Islam, reliable sources said Deborah was told to apologize immediately after that incident but she refused and that was why it escalated to that extent. Davido by this act might have offended Boko Haram terrorist and all those northern leaders like IBB, Buhari etc, you remember what the governor said after Deborah was killed, it was obvious he supported the killing, a dead person cannot prove right even if the killer is killed immediately.
My point, those DSS and security personnel could be used if they want to deal with Davido, even his friends, staff and personnel are not left out, they can be recruited to take him out, God forbid, he couldn't even protect his own son, nzogbu nzogbu method has never and will never yield any good results, he should apologize even if he doesn't mean it, I'm sure his mother would say the same thing if alive. My one cent

What was Deborah's offence ?
Are you threatening Davido?

IconicR:
Any proof of elrufai insulting Christ? As for Deborah's everything is in God's hand and I don't want to say some things. I'll keep advising people to respect boundaries because we react differently to things

Which boundaries are you talking about.? Who sets the boundaries? You?

It is rare for cheaters(both males and females) to change their ways. It's a habit. A habit they formed even before getting married. Habits are difficult to discard.

I believe the best action to take is to leave the cheating partner. This will allow you to heal.
When you're cheated on, it takes away your self esteem and depression follows. It's a place no one wishes to be.

Staying with a cheater is a dangerous prospect. The person might give you incurable STD. The wife of my friend gave him genital herpes and she wanted to deny it. A very sad story but funny at the same time.

No matter how you want to pretend, it's very difficult to forgive a cheater. My friend has not forgiven his wife. He told me that he is just waiting for the right time to strike.

confusedlady:



That Kobojunkie character is a danger to this section. She specialises in teaching heresy and blasphemy. Best treatment for her is to ignore. She thrives on attention which is her oxygen. By all means avoid her. She is an attention junkie.

I have interacted with that guy here before. After which I decided not interact with him/her again because of the reasons you mentioned.
He/she teaches a lot heresies here. I mean, a lot!

She seems not to understand basic Christian theology.

She can also be an agent from the dark side. It's a possibility. The things she says here are scary.

Worriedwife:
It looks like kids 4rm divorced homes are only females. What of the male kids from divorced homes,,should they be avoided for marriage?

I don't think the OP is singling out female children from broken homes for attack. It seems that he is passing through this situation. That's why he is seeking for our opinions.
For me, one should be careful getting into relationship with anyone from a broken home irrespective of the person's sex.

solreb:
Praying for the dead is a waste of time and future effort. Man has only one chance to.make it right with his God. Once.man dies, he is judged immediately and a decision is reached weather he will be in hell or praise. Heb 9.27 states clearly that "And as it is appointed for men to die once, but after this the judgment". And the story of Lazarus and the Rich man in Luke 16:19-31 indicates clearly what happens to man fter death. While Lazarus was in paradise the Richmond was in hell fire such that he begged Abraham ti met Lazarus dip his finger in water and put in his mouth due to the torment of fire where he was.

If what you are saying is true, how then did Jesus and Peter raised people from death?

[quote author=Gentew post=121675360]

I am presently trying to turn down a 21year old lady who is a virgin but wants me to deflower her but knowing fully well that I have no future with her..... I pray I'm able to turn her down until the very end cuz she's actually pretty and lovable.[/jquote]

Who told you she is a virgin?

jesusjnr2020:
Thank God I have on several occasions after I got saved.

I still regret the one I didn't turn down while I was still a sinner, so that still bears heavily in my mind and help me not to repeat the same mistake I made then.

God bless.

It was not a mistake. You wanted it too. She offered you what you liked.

omaira:


Yes I love her very much… she didn’t really catch me in the act, she saw a chat … and the chat was not containing sexual context

If you love her, how can you be cheating on her. I pity the lady.

She knows that you are lying. She doesn't trust you anymore. She might not tell you this but you have killed the trust she has in you.

Believe it or not, you will do it again.

omaira:
Dear Nairalanders is it advisable to confess the truth to your partner if you cheated ??

Please I need your opinions

Once your partner starts to suspect you are cheating, he or she has taken the necessary time to figure it out. Your denials don't matter.

Cheaters always think they are very smart without knowing that once you start to cheat, it will always show in your behaviour towards your partner. It is just a matter of time before your partner will decode everything.

Cheaters are pathological liars. While they lie, they can cry and swear with all kinds of things(eg God,their lives, their ancestors grave etc). Cheaters have no integrity.

The worst part is that they are most likely to do it again and again.

meobizy:
“iS tHiS nOt AgAInSt aFRiCaN cUlTuRe?” — Tunde, Sango-ota.

She’s not from Nsukka again? Maybe this is her maternal hometown.

I can imagine if she never traveled out and tried promoting her work on Nairaland. She for chop ban tire till frustration catch am.

Did she tell you she was from Nsukka?

Lastborn0074:
Please I need honest suggestions. My wife has had several male platonic friends ever since we met. She became friends with others through me. I trusted her because she's a very sociable person, so I wasn't bothered because I know a lot of ladies that have male friends too. She's been open to me about them.

Recently, something happened. A close female friend of hers (also married) started keeping her at arm's length. My wife didn't know what the problem was until information got to her that this friend of hers was going about telling people that she could no longer be friends with her because she's sleeping around with men indiscriminately.

My wife confronted her with this information, for which she denied. But the informant, who was also invited, insisted that she actually said it. Before this time, my wife would always complain that each time she visits her friend, she would knock on the door but nobody would respond. This happened repeatedly until her tenant told my wife in confidence that his landlady was always around each time she visits.

Recently, I discovered that my wife was actually having amorous relationship with her male friends. I have access to her messeinger and I have seen those amorous chats. She would delete the ones that could implicate her. A male friend of hers even sent her adult videos and she told him to send more, that she was enjoying it. This man went further to send her his masturbation video.

I confronted my wife with these and what people told me, but she denied. After putting much pressure on her, she said she was about to do it, not that she actually did it. I asked her the reason and she said that it was because of the hardship we were facing. Since her business collapsed, it's been very difficult to survive with our four children. I'm the only one fending for the family. Even after confronting her, I discovered that she's still into the act.

Given the above scenario, what should I do? Please I want only healthy comments that will help me make my decision. Thanks.

My brother im so sorry this is happening to you. Infidelity is one of the worst things that can happen to someone in a marriage. It throws a betrayed spouse off balance and makes the person depressed.
You must know that your wayward wife is not your friend. She is your adversary, so be careful.

Stop sleeping with her. Go and do full panel STD test to make sure you are free from any disease.

She is mostly likely lying to you. Wayward spouses lie a lot to cover their tracks. I believe she must have had physical affairs with one or two of these men. It does not take anything for physical affair to take place. And often they do it without protection.

For now, don't think that your wife is remorseful. What she is feeling right now is regret and not remorse. Regret and remorse are not the same. She is regretting being caught. If you had not caught her, she would have been doing what she was doing.

Don't pay too much attention to her pleadings. She is in a self preservation mode. She is trying to preserve her fake image and the marriage. She is ashamed. Don't promise your wife forgiveness yet even if you have the intention of reconciling with her in the future.

Please let her people know about what happened. Don't mind her apology. The response you get from her people will determine if you will tell your people or not. You need emotional support right now. For that, you can tell a close friend you trust about what's going on.

For a marriage to thrive there must be respect, trust and love. Your wife doesn't respect you. She has destroyed the trust you have in her. She doesn't love you ofcourse . If she loves you, she wouldn't have done what she did.

Most of the time, the signs of infidelity in a marriage might be presenting itself before the betrayed spouse but he or she often ignores them. Some of these signs are: your wife always picking fights with you, her phone is always on silent, change of password, avoiding physical contact with you, she is always with her phone wherever she goes, she is ignoring you, she is always giving excuses to deny you sex, she often tells you to be quick about it whenever you want to have sex with her etc. Often a betrayed spouse attributes some of the above mentioned signs to other factors other than infidelity. And i don't blame them for that

From now onwards, judge your wife by her actions and not her words. She can't be trusted. She is a liar. Watch her closely to see signs of remorse if you are still interested in the marriage. If you are no longer interested, please cut your losses and move on because your wife is not a safe partner. The woman you taught you married was just a fantasy.

My brother, your wife did not just learn what she was doing recently. She was doing it even before you married her but you didn't know. Habits are very difficult to drop. Marriage doesn't make one to change a habit.

Your wife might become a safe partner in the future if she is ready to do the work that is involved.

Again, are you sure all the kids are yours?

On a spiritual level, infidelity brings stagnation in marriages. This might be one of the reasons why your marriage is not thriving. Please eat well and sleep well. May God strengthen you.

Witnesstony28:
I had this sexual encounter with a girl without condom in February of this year and since then my health has not been the same.

After 2 weeks of meeting her, I started feeling sick, had rashes at the back of both of my legs, tired almost all the time, sore throat, and since then I have taken all sorts of drug - orthodox and trado but yet no response.

I have to gone for several test. One result Said beta hemolytic streptococcus pyogenese was seen in my urine culture and I was given erythromycin and augmentin for 2 weeks. I felt a little relief. Then I started having tongues thrush.

It's almost 6 months now and I have not felt any better.

I have had HIV test done severally but all come back negative.

But my worry is, I still feel sick. What could this disease be.

The girl confessed that she only has what they call - heat. That's my first time hearing this.
I stay in ik and really need help. I sincerely regret that sexual encounter and wish I could retrace my steps.

Someone help!!!

It looks much like genital herpes. It's very common. The symptoms comes and goes periodically. It can be severe in some people. Especially people with low immunity. It is caused by HPV virus. If its genital herpes, it will clear on it's own with time. The girl's body might be shedding the virus but at the same time she might not be experiencing any or severe symptoms like you. It happens like that to many people.
Women are very funny atimes when it comes to sex. A lot of them succumb to unprotected sex when put under pressure. I believe you will get well. Be careful next time. Don't trust anyone.

How long will it take bet9ja to resolve this problem.? Everything about naija is always awkward. It's been days since this happened.

ceaser:
Another one! In less than 12 hrs. Na wa o.

We never even settle the matter from this thread
https://www.nairaland.com/6509570/fooled-girlfriend-4-years-thinking

And another real life account is popping up. The same format, the same temptation and the same disappointment.



In that earlier thread, she was 22 years. The reason given for unfaithfulness was that she is young and therefore should be allowed to explore and look for the man that is best since the current boyfriend has not even promised her marriage nor engaged to her yet.

Now in this thread, the subject is 27 years, already ripe for the nuptial knot and promised marriage by the boyfriend when he comes to the country.

But the reason for justification of unfaithfulness in this case is that "she is 27 and she'll be finding any means to roll up with guy who's ready to ask her hand in marriage".

So I think the male folks needs to be educated: when is the right age for the girl to be faithful in a relationship?

The truth is that like most men, most women of nowadays don't value commitment in relationships. They hate it. They like sneaking around even when they are married. I have seen this a lot.

Men always miss this point a lot. Many men think that it's hard for women to cheat but it's false. Women cheat a lot but they are very smart when it comes to cheating. They are very hard to catch. Your wife might be cheating on you for years without you detecting it. Obviously, the signs are always there but you will be ignoring them thinking that they are normal.

maryjames9:
Oga park well. Have you introduced her to your parents? Has she done same? Have you done proper ceremonial introduction? Have you married her? Probably NO with a capital letter.

I am tired of all these endless lamentations on Nairaland from kids all the time. You are yet to put a ring on her finger and you do not want someone else who is serious and ready to wed her? At 27 you want her to waste her time with your sorry and unserious ass in a relationship of boyfriend and girlfriend that will probably not lead to marriage?

I will advise your girlfriend to dump your sorry ass and get on with a serious and ready man.

Maryjames, if you can really sit down, take a deep breath and read between lines, through the conversation the girl had with the guy on WhatsApp, you should have observed that the girl is not really in love with the man who promised her marriage.

She is not interested in commitment rather she is trying to get the best catch in terms of money. Well that is what she wants, I will not blame her for that. Every decision/ actions we take have consequences, good or bad as the case may be.

We should be careful what we wish for because this type of woman can have extra marital affairs if things get tough in her marriage. I have seen a lot when it comes to these things.

matm:
A 20year old woman speaking.Ur father has been sleeping with u.Threatens u not with a gun but with a knife.And on those occasions u couldn't shout for neighbours to hear nor report to ur mother,ur relatives or police .
And because u are a woman (pretending of beign of weaker gender),u went online to garner public sympathy just like so many retired and expired Bleep around women are doing.
Ur adviser told u to go online and hide under d canopy of feminism to gain sympathy and trend.

The young woman is not looking for sympathy but justice. Obviously, the family was trying hard to kill the case under the guise of sacrificing to a fictional sky god. They have also bribed our police as usual that was why they released the criminal. Which court is handling the matter? None. This shows they were trying to kill the case. Please, try and read between lines.

The young woman was left with no other choice than to embrace social media in order to get justice. And it's working very well in her favour. The man belongs to the prison.

As for the young woman not shouting, this is possible especially when the whole thing started when she was quite very young. She was under a kind of mental captivity in the hands of the man. It's a psychological state. This is where psychologists will help and unravel what was going on in the mind of the victim.

I don't understand what is going on in your mind but from your comment I can see your inability to condemn what this wicked man has done to a fellow innocent human being like yourself.

Helpfromabove1:
From the story above , I am not sorry to stay it your mother had failed in her duty as a mother , her child will sleep outside and she will not know And this has been going on for this long she as truly failed as a mother.

Secondly I can deduce that the story has been dealt with ,so why bring it to social media , somethings are meant to remain in the family it called family secret bringing this story (that the family and authorities has already intervene) is just to shame yourself and your family and not only the man. And to make it even worst u did not hid any information about yourself or family even your face at least ,as much as I don't and won't in anyway support the act of the man ,I must let you know the internet never forget and it will mostly likely hunt u in the future.

I think you have a big problem. What is shameful about someone crying for justice?. She is the victim for God's sake.