₦airaland Forum

Jannuxajj:
I am an introvert that is into programming and I work for companies from home. I became tired of all the gold diggers I was attracting because I discovered they are only looking for sponsors so for the first time I made up my mind to start approaching.

I saw a young lady walking towards me so I decided to start with her. I greeted her and immediately she answered I didn't know what to say next thing I said was are you coming from the gym and she said no and looked at me somehow only for me to stammer and then ask for her name she just ignored me and was pressing her phone.

It bad to be sitting indoors everyday I swear loneliness dey kill me.

Megaflex:
I need advice on the best and natural way to handle asthma.

I got married in April this year and my wife is asthmatic. I'll seriously need advice on the best possible way to handle her asthma incase she gets pregnant. Please help a brother.

Mod please help me move this to front-page

charlesELIKIBA:
HELLP NAIRALANDERS

I will be brief with my writeup as much as possible so I can explain my connection with this lady.

My single mom gave me away at a tender age of 5 to her elder brother (financial difficulties i assume), this ''aunty'' happens to be the wife of this my mother's elder brother.

Aready they had 4 children, all boys.

The home was a tough upbringing with strict rules about socialising, we weren't allowed to bring friends home or go to friends places. It was pretty strict and my uncles wife i would say was the mastermind of it all, she was strict and mean maybe because it was a house of 5 boys.

Growing up in my uncles home, I wouldn't say I was treated diffrently because I always got matching outfits with my uncle's children during christmas, gifts during christmas, same portions of food BUT IN ALL I was always scared of doing somethings my cousins would do. I didn't feel free growing up, i felt diffrent from them. In some cases they attended the best schools than I (but I never attended a govt. school or a bad private school).

It's like if their school fees was 1m naira per term, mine would be 150,000 per term.

I lived with them until I was about 16 or 17 and one morning I woke up and they said i was going back to my mother at 15 or 16 like any kid, you would start to develop conscience (sense), maybe breaking some rules and being stubborn just like their own kids. This I assume was why they wanted to send me back to my mother OTHERWISE I CAN THINK OF NOTHING ELSE I DID WRONG OR DIFFRENT.

In all of these years living with them, I saw my mother as a strange person. I had no motherly connection with her. My anty to me, was my real mother. Whenever we went visiting my mother in very rare occasions, it was always awkward.

Well long story short, I found myself back in my mother's arms, to a new environment i knew nothing about and starting to learn to live with a woman called my mother. I was naive, had no choice but to accept realities on ground. Do you know that feeling of living in a pouch house and wake up next morning in a 1 room surrounded by thick bushes. Yes that was the change.

I was enrolled into a school, my uncle was repeatedly forced to send/ pay my schoolfees until i was in ss3 and i called him to inform him about waec enrolment. He told me on the phone ''all the exams i have been writing, how many have i passed'' and that was it. He never sent a dime anymore meanwhile at this point his children, my cousins were already miles ahead of me suddenly in education. When i left the home, the eldest son went to canada to school, the second who is my agemate was already in a private uni in Nigeria and the 3rd who i am senior to with a year is preparing to go to ukraine for school and years later the last born who i spoonfed and chewed meat for attended uni in Ghana.

Well long story short, since my uncle had failed me. My mother said it was time i go to my father. My father was old retired pensioner. My mother took me to him, as expected awkward encounter. I have never known this man, no memory of him. Well he said he would find my enrolment money and he did, he later passed on a year or two later.

I enrolled waec and pased in one sitting, thanks to miracle centres.

PS: i must say i was never an intelligent student. i wasn't even average but i wasn't the poorest and neither of my uncles children were better. We were all poor educationally.

Long story short another uncle sprang up and paid for my university diploma which i later acquiried.


YEARS LATER my uncle and aunty decided to move back to our home town, please note the home my mother stayed in was this my uncles home. It was the boy quarters, the main house was not even in sight as at the time i was returned to my mother. We did series of bush clearing and snakes killing lol. well my uncle returned home town after retirement and setup the main structure ( a 5 bed room duplex) and thats were they lived while i and my mother lived in the BQ.

I WAS very angry with myself that i happened to still live with them AGAIN, i needed to get out of their sight, my condition was bad. i was a mere teacher to some rickety school. In all of this my uncle's wife always ensured she knew what i was upto and she derived satisfaction when she knew i wasn't doing better than her kids who were all abroad. i turned to their errand boy again after years of neglect. i was very angry with myself and needed to save to get out of the house.

Well i did manage to save up and leave the house and i promised myself never to return to that house. i felt neglected, i felt they sent me away because the goodthings were coming and they couldn't bear to see me share in them because to me they were my parents.


YEARS LATER, my aunty was sick with cancer
please note before i left the home, my uncle and aunty always sent me to travel journeys to get them medicines from a monastry. i attended such trips severally and ran other seperate errands but i never dared to drive their car talkless ask for the key. i always washed their car in the mornings, i would never also dare to see myself in the living room of the duplex with the remote in hand. when they moved back to the hometown, that fear in my childhood started again but this time i was mature enough to know i would never m amount to anything in life if i continued this again hence the reason i needed to move out.

So my aunty sickness grew worse, the husband flew her to india and back but the sickness grew worse. in all of this cancer times i never went back to the house to see her. I only heard of her conditions from my siblings (my half siblings, my mother was married to 3 men in diffrent years and she had only me for my father, another for another man and 3 for another man, i was the lastborn of all).

Then my aunty died. The day she died, i saw her in my dreams and she was crying saying ''she forgave me''. A day or two later i went to my sisters store and she told me of my aunty death, i went to my rented apartment and cried profusely. i later summouned courage and maybe sympathy and went to my uncles house and i cried before my uncle and told him to forgive me too for all abandoning them all this while.

NOW ABOUT MY AUNTY SAYING SHE FORGAVE ME IN THE DREAM: i did not do her any wrong neither did i wish death on her. All her life her greatest fear was maybe i would become greater than her children. She loved these comparisms, i was never wicked to her, i never cursed her, i was never rude to her unless i some instances when she sends me errands and i tell her i have other things to do.... Otherwise i never was negative to her instead she is the one nobody likes, by nobody i mean my uncles family. Nobody talks good of her, they say she controls my uncle and also squandered his money but in all of this i never spoke of my experiences living with them and somethings they did wrong that made me feel diffrent, i did not even tell you guys neither have i told my mother ever. i don't see them as anything that would stop my growth in life. i hate to talk about the bad in people.

WELL BACK TO REASON THE TOPIC WAS CREATED, why do i keep repeatedly seeing her in my dreams even after her death and its always on a negative role. its either in the dream she still plays mother, or she is gossip about me in the dream or she is against me in the dream, just think of anything negative in a dream and she will be the mastermind. This is really beginning to worry me. Why is she still attached to me in the dreams?

After she died, her husband, my uncle started his own sickness but has been sick for years now, he is bed ridden. The family has repeatedly asked him if there is anything he and his late wife did in the past to amount such sickness were he is living in pain but refused to die and he would not answer. One time they said, he said ''it was out of ignorance'' and thats all he ever said about anything.

It will also be good to note that of all my 4 cousin brothers and i today, i am the most successful by far.

i just finished my house (a 3bedroom, 2 bedroom, 1 bedrrom bungalow)
january this year i bought my 3rd car.
i travel round the world effortlessly.
YES I DID TURN OUT FAR BETTER THAN MY COUSINS WHO YOU KNOW HAD THE BEST EDUCATION.

I don't want to talk of their conditions, lets concentrate on me.


So this is my much writeup... I had to skip many things so you can bear to read but please be free to ask me questions.

Why do I repeatedly see my aunty in my dreams.... just before this writeup, i had just woken up from another dream she was present in, she was whispering to the ears of a very good friend of mine and then the friends turned to me and was like '' ah cahrles na so you be''?...and i was angry and was like '' how can you believe something someone you just met told you against i your best friends word'' and minutes later dream ended and i woke up.

At this point i am thinking of going spiritual to know why this is happening but this will be a first in my life. There are two popular places i have never being in my life until lately last year... One is a shrine and the other is a police station. Last year was my first time to be in a police station.
I was driving my unregistered car. That was my offence.

Malawian:
Do you know that the other end of this head bridge at "Asaba" is actually still in Anambra state? The border of Anambra state and Delta state started even before the head bridge. You will still see the sign board there.

AsomughaChuks05:
No. The whole bridge is on Anambra soil. That's why it is called Niger Bridge Onitsha.

Dantepet3000:
First and foremost most girls don't realize that most men spend more than they earn. All in a bid to enhance affection towards them.

I dated her for two years until that faithful day she found my salary voucher on my bed. Tho I do other side hustlE that enabled me pay her bills.

I've always known that when she discovers the amount I earn in my company, she will be scared of the future between us. I remember the days in shoprite that I was only able to afford bread. Oh my God, I don suffer. Anyway I had plans for us despite my 45k salary of an MSC holder. There is no financial hole I did not help her block. Infact I did what guys who earn more than me couldn't do.

She started misbehaving towards me ever since she saw that pay cheque. What she didn't know was that I did not use my other professional qualification in the company and when she left me.

I decided to forward other qualification to our management. Like play like play my salary rose to 75k after 3months 100k after 6 months 120k, now I am a site manager and I earn 360k. I believe the whole graduates in her family don't earn what I now earn combined. I am not proud or beefing anyone. Am just reminiscing. By the special grace of God I will even go higher...

PS. Now I am spending my money on my mum and family. I thank God for another chance. Bless

covid2019:
I am in a dilemma worsened by this covid19.

I am a graduate male of 29 residing in the East. I still squat with a friend, not because I don't have money for house rent. But principally because I have been unable to figure out what I want to do with my life, hence renting a house feels like a commitment that might get me stuck.

I always feel I might move anytime soon-- to either another state or abroad for masters or just practice of my profession. Note that I didn't study a STEM course.

All these while squatting, I have been saving via my proceeds from hustles.

In the wake of this COVID19, I checked all my banks and found out that money I have in my account has lost so much value given the dollar rate.

I have 11.4 million, inclusive of my working capital, plus a rickety car valued at 350k. Each time, I need just 3-5m as working capital.

It seems that trying to save more is false economy and might be counter productive.

NOW, I AM CONSIDERING buying a plot of land and erecting a small house even if it's 3 rooms. This, I think will serve as investment that will keep appreciating and also serve as residence.

Or just open a domiciliary account to hedge against naira fall and continue saving.
What do you think please?


Building a house & buying lands will be a nice �� investment. There are new alternative methods of building stronger and cheaper houses.

brainz360:
Hello guys, as a fresh graduate with a 2:2 grade, which would you advice I do or would you rather opt in for among the three to have a successful career in the near future?

Profmarley:
Lol.. (Oppositional) Powers waiting for me at the edge of my breakthrough/success, what are you waiting for ............... If you know, you know..

akinjojo1234:
You mean the bus got HIJACKED

Adaibeku:
Did they pick up arms ? Hell no
Asaba people said they are not biafra ,that biafra is wicked , one Nigeria for life!
And now
Now where is nzeogwu from?


Fulani I remove cap for una , u people are only Igbo match in Nigeria other tribes are akamu